Chapter 20
Anna was pulling on her clothes while simultaneously stealing peeks at Owen as he dressed. She couldn’t help herself.
With a low laugh, Owen shook his head and pulled her into him, pressing his cheek to the top of her head. “The way you look at me sometimes, it makes me feel like Superman, you know that?” He pulled back to see her face, his smile softer now. “You make me feel special, Anna. I honestly can’t remember the last time that happened.”
She felt her heart squish around in her chest, which she tried to ignore because this was how it had to be. “Don’t get too attached to me,” she managed to say lightly, in a teasing tone. “Wouldn’t want you pining away for me or anything.”
He didn’t smile. He wasn’t playing. “Remind me again why this has to end?”
She stared at him, feeling panic clog her throat. “What other way is it going to end? People leave, Owen. In fact, I’ve met three of your exes by complete accident, so even if this was somehow real—which we both know it’s not—it’s only a matter of time before I’m the next ex.”
He let out a long exhale. “Anna, this is real. At least for me.”
She shook her head. “We said—”
“I know what we said, that this is just until the case is over. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t real.”
She opened her mouth to argue the point, but... she wasn’t sure she wanted to. If he wanted this to be real until it was over, then who was she to try to convince him otherwise? Because deep down, and maybe also not so deep down, she wasn’t in a hurry to let go of the way he made her feel.
“Look,” he said. “I don’t have to be at work until one. I don’t usually work on Saturdays, but we’ve got a big group to take river rafting today. I know you said you don’t have to be at work until nine, which means we have nearly an hour. Can I take you to breakfast?”
Her stomach growled, making them both laugh. It’d been midnight before he’d made them a chicken stir-fry, but those calories were long gone. “Mari texted me while we were in the shower. The meeting’s been moved to another day.”
He smiled, slinging an arm around her neck and reeling her in, pressing his mouth to her temple. “Let’s feed the beast.”
They got caught in beach traffic on Lake Drive. Stopped with nowhere to go in a hurry, she turned to face him, feeling like she knew him so well in some ways, but in others, he was still a mystery.
He glanced over with a what’s-up expression.
“Humor me,” she said. “Your Kentucky Derby horse name is an emotion you’re not good at, plus the last thing you ate. Go.”
“Love You.”
Her heart stopped. “W-what?”
“An emotion I’m not good at—love. The last thing I ate...”
Her.She felt her face heat, and he laughed at her expression. “I’ve had my mouth on every inch of your body and you can still blush about it? Cute.”
She rolled her eyes. “For the last time, I’m not cute.”
“You’re right. You’re the sexiest, smartest, funniest woman I’ve ever had the pleasure of pleasuring.” He grinned when she groaned in embarrassment. “And you?” he asked. “Your Kentucky Derby name?”
“Same as yours,” she admitted, and he laughed again.
They hadn’t moved an inch, and she pointed at him. “You’re up. You get to ask a question now.”
He thought about it for a minute. “What was awesome as a kid but sucks as an adult?”
“Birthdays,” she said instantly. “Not because I don’t want to get older. I don’t mind that. I just don’t like being the center of attention. You?”
“Waking up in another place than you fell asleep. As in when you fell asleep in the car and got carried to bed without remembering, and then panicked when you awoke, because how did you get there.”
This made her laugh. “Yes! And eating large quantities of candy in a single serving. Oh, and staying up until two in the morning.”
“I’d agree with you, but last night...” He flashed her a sexy smile that brought back the night before, the memory of how his mouth had felt on hers, his hands gliding over her body, the way his voice went all low and sexy whenever she touched him...
He glanced over at her. “Now I have to know what you’re thinking about,” he said. “Your eyes heated.”
She opened her mouth, but luckily for her, traffic began to move. And two minutes later, he’d turned off the main road.
He pulled up to... “A food truck?” she asked, staring at a red-and-white truck parked at an out-of-the-way beach she’d never been to before.
“Best breakfast burritos on the lake,” he promised.
They ordered, then took their food to the beach, where they sat on top of an empty picnic bench and ate.
“Okay,” she said around a mouthful. “You’re right. This is the best breakfast burrito I’ve ever had.” And so was the view, both the lake and the man at her side, sprawled out in faded jeans, a T-shirt advertising some dive bar in Mexico, and mirrored sunglasses that were sexy as hell.
“How did you find this place?” she asked. “I’ve lived here all my life and I never knew it existed. My dad’s buried at the cemetery across the street, and I’ve visited him a bunch of times and never even realized this was right here.”
He’d stopped chewing, swallowed, and pushed his sunglasses to the top of his head to look at her with an odd expression.
“What? Do I have something in my teeth?” She covered her mouth with a hand. “Dammit—”
He caught her fingers. “You don’t have anything in your teeth.”
“Then what?”
“I found this place when visiting my mom. She’s also across the street.”
They stared at each other in surprise at the very odd connection. They’d had so many of those she was starting to think the universe was trying to tell her something.
Owen took his last bite, then crumpled up the wrapping from his breakfast burrito and made a three-pointer into the trash bin fifteen feet away. He then took her trash, crumpled it as well, and made another basket.
“Nice shooting,” she said.
“We’ve got a basketball hoop behind our building, and the guys and I play at lunch. How have we never run into each other across the street? Or anywhere.”
“I don’t know. Maybe...” She bit her lower lip on the thought she’d been having for a while but had buried because it felt so foreign.
“Maybe what?” he asked. “Maybe it wasn’t meant to happen until now?”
Yes. Exactly...
He was still just watching her, thoughts hidden. After a moment, he looked like he wanted to say something.
“Since when do you hold anything back?” she asked.
He gave her a small smile. “You think you know me.”
“I think I’m getting there. For instance,” she said, “I know you’re about to tell me what you were just thinking about. And then after that, you’re going to kiss me.”
Leaning in, he kissed her. When she was breathless, he pulled back with a smile.
“First of all,” she said in a been-kissed-stupid voice, “just because you switched the order doesn’t mean I don’t know you. Now spill.”
He took her hand in his. “When Ruby got her dementia diagnosis a few years ago, she said something to me I wasn’t ready to hear. I wanted to move in with her and help out, but she refused to let me, insisting instead on memory care. She wouldn’t tell me why, but I knew it was because she didn’t want me to give up my life for hers.”
Moved, Anna felt her eyes sting. “She loves you very much.”
He nodded. “She does. And it’s her greatest wish to see me have what she always wanted. Love. A family. She told me I was going to meet someone who was going to change my life, who’d fill a spot inside me that was empty, hollow.”
She felt her heart skip a beat. “What did you say?”
A corner of his mouth quirked, his voice wry. “I said I didn’t need that. I was fine as is. She told me that was true, I didn’t need love in my life to survive, but she knew that deep down, I wanted it. Craved it.”
Everything around them seemed to vanish. The breeze, the sounds of the water, everything.
“I denied it,” he said. “I was frustrated with her trying to fix my life, which I didn’t think needed fixing.”
Anna realized she was holding her breath. She told herself she didn’t know why, but she did. “And now?”
His eyes never left hers, letting her see everything he felt as he felt it. It was humbling, how he always let her in, even when it wasn’t comfortable for him. “And now,” he said quietly, bringing her hand up to his mouth, brushing a kiss to the sensitive skin of her palm, “now I think I was full of shit for not admitting that she was right. I’m surrounded by great people, and yet I still get lonely. And... someone really great did come into my life.”
The air in her lungs whooshed out.
His mouth curved. “Don’t panic.”
“Why would I panic?” She winced as her voice came out two full octaves higher than usual. “Who’s panicking? Not this girl.” God, she was such an idiot, and tightened her lips together before more words escaped her.
Owen grinned, but then he let it fade as he looked at her for a long moment, his usual calm patience in play. “Would you like to visit your dad while we’re here?”
“If you’re up for a visit to your mom.”
He smiled. Standing, he pulled her up as well, then kept his hand in hers as they walked across the street.
Caitlin’s words echoed in Anna’s mind—every week he’d visit his mom’s grave site and never take me. Not one time. He had invisible barriers protecting him that kept me on the outside looking in. Fact is, I wanted more and he couldn’t give it to me. He can’t give it to anyone.
But he was taking Anna.
A guy was selling flowers outside the gates of the cemetery. Owen bought two bouquets and offered one to Anna. “I’ll leave you to it,” he said quietly.
Anna took her time taking the curving path through the beautiful property. It was odd to think of a place where the dead lay as beautiful, but the gently rolling grassy hills dotted with pines and outlined by the stunning Sierra mountains could be described as nothing but.
She looked around and didn’t see a soul, not even Owen.
She’d been here many times with Wendy, but she’d never come alone. As she stepped off the path and dropped to her knees in front of her father’s gravestone, she sighed. “Hey, Dad.”
Throat tight, she set the flowers at the base of his headstone. “So... Wendy’s about ready to pop.” Her dad would’ve loved being a grandpa. “I’ll be there for her,” she promised. “And I’ll tell the babies all about you.” She paused. “But I think I’ll leave out some things, if you don’t mind.” A half laugh that was far too close to a sob escaped her. “I wish you were here, Dad. I’ve got so many questions. Like, how in the world did I never see Shady Joe for who he really was? And why were you friends with him? And... why were you in possession of a coin that belonged to a woman who’d owned the whole set and a million-dollar necklace—all of which are still missing?”
Still on her knees, she drew a deep breath. It was quiet out here, only a slight rustling of the trees and the occasional squawk of a bird. “I love you,” she said. “Nothing will change that. But I’m learning some things about you that I wish I could unlearn. Your past...” She closed her eyes. “You were funny, kind, adventurous, and giving... so giving. You were capable of so much: being a great father, a brilliant businessman, brave in the face of the disease that forced you into a wheelchair... But never in a million years could I have guessed your bio included being a thief.” She paused. “I didn’t want to believe it, still don’t, but you’ve got a record.” She pressed the heels of her hands to her eyes. “I don’t get it—you hated injustice of any kind. You hated it so much that I could’ve passed a lie detector test claiming you would never, ever have stolen a penny from another soul.”
She swiped at a rogue tear and kept her eyes squeezed shut. “I want to trust you weren’t like Shady Joe. I want to believe that your early past ‘mistakes,’ as Sonya called them, stayed in your past, that you didn’t steal the Ruby Red and the coins. I know I just told you that I still love you, and I do, but...” Damn. She couldn’t even say it out loud, that if she found out he’d done this, it would, at the very least, tarnish that love—
A hand covered hers where she’d fisted it on one of her thighs. She didn’t startle because she recognized not only the touch but the way she felt in Owen’s presence.
Safe.
He dropped to his knees at her side, slid an arm around her waist, and brushed a kiss to her cheek. “It’s okay to love him how you remember him,” he said quietly. “Don’t let what we’re doing taint those memories.”
Turning her head, she looked at Owen and realized he had all the incredible characteristics her dad had possessed. Kindness. Patience. Adventurousness. Easy generosity. He was strong, both physically and mentally, and never seemed to give in to the doubts that constantly plagued her.
Owen took in her dad’s gravestone. “Sir, my name’s Owen Harris. I’m a friend of your daughter’s. If you’re anything like my mom, you worry about her and Wendy. I want to assure you, they’re amazing, capable women, but I’ll be here if they need me. For anything.” He brought his and Anna’s entwined hands to his heart and held them there, and for that moment in time, almost unbearably moved, she could almost believe they might actually have a shot together.
Almost.