12. Finn
Jax and I are meeting Ryker at the studio this afternoon, but he calls and asks if I’d grab lunch with him first. Knowing how much it takes out of me to finish a song, I eagerly agree.
He chooses a restaurant on the edge of town with the best French dip sandwiches, or so he says. Once we settle into the booth with our food, he stares at me instead of digging in right away, which is odd. This man always has an appetite.
“Something on your mind?” I ask after taking my first bite.
“You and I’ve gotten close this last year on tour. In fact, you’ve become one of my best friends. I don’t want to make this weird, so I’ll come straight out with it. Will you be my best man?”
I’m not sure what my expression shows, but I wasn’t expecting this.
Before I can respond, Jax continues, “You’ve become important to both Sloane and me on tour. We couldn’t imagine not having you included in our special day.”
Clearing my throat, I quickly say, “Uh, yeah. Of course. I’d be honored.”
Jax’s grin is infectious. “Great. I’m gonna ask Ryker and Ryan to be my other groomsmen.”
“Do I need a tux?”
Thankfully, Jax shakes his head. “No. We’re not wearing them. Apparently, Sloane only needs to know your sizes, and she’ll take care of everything. We’re going for a casual beach wedding, where we’ll wear white shirts and dress pants.”
“Really? I thought she’d want something more formal. With Sloane being the epitome of being a planner.”
“I know, right?” Jax laughs. “But I think with all the planning for Lanie and Ryan’s wedding, she wants to keep it simple and fun, with very little stress for everyone involved.
” Then he shakes his head. “If you think she’s not planning everything to a T, you clearly don’t know my future wife…
Huh… wife… I love the sound of that.” Jax’s expression turns gooey, and I swear the man has stars twinkling in his eyes.
“She’s perfect for you.” I grin at seeing how smitten he is with her. Then I admit, “I hope one day I’m as lucky as you are to find someone so special.”
Why the hell does Raven’s beautiful face pop into my brain at this moment?
Surely, it’s because we’re talking about Sloane, and they’re identical twins.
That’s gotta be it, right?
No, dumbass, you’re clearly thinking of Raven. Let’s face it, you’ve hardly stopped thinking of her since the day you met… and now, you’re stuck pretending to be her boyfriend during some of the biggest moments of her family’s lives.
Fuck, will they all hate me when things between Raven and I end?
Clueless to my internal freakout, he grins widely. “I really hope that for you, man. It’s the best feeling in the world.”
I’m sure it is. Maybe someday I’ll experience it.
“As the best man, are there any other responsibilities I should know about? What about a bachelor party… a speech? You know I’m down to help with anything you need.”
“Ah… we’re all going out for beers on Wednesday for Ryan.
I’m good with that.” He’s quiet for a moment as he finally takes a bite of his sandwich.
When he’s done chewing, he chuckles once.
“Ha… I’m probably the least rockstar-like-groom on the planet.
All I want is to make music and spend my time with Sloane.
I could give two shits about anything else. ”
“That kind of attitude will keep you successful at both,” I encourage.
I’ve seen plenty of people in this business lose focus on their priorities, leading them on the shortcut to disaster.
Jax, well, he’s the real deal. He loves music, but if he chose to walk away from it, I’m positive he’d land on his feet.
“That sure is the plan. I love her, and I’m thrilled her family is on board with our impromptu wedding.” Taking a sip of his soda, he chuckles. “Hell… I half-expected her dad or someone in her family to ask if she were pregnant… She isn’t, for the record… But I wouldn’t blame them for asking.”
“Y’all had a valid reason to keep things on the down low. The moment you step back on stage at the Seaside festival, and we release our first single as a band, you’re gonna be back in the spotlight for the foreseeable future.”
“Uggg… don’t get me wrong. I want to make it big with our band.
But I won’t deny I loved my low-key life in Seaside.
Sure, I get recognized by locals, but they knew me before fame, so they don’t treat me much different from before.
Besides, it’s such a tourist town, I can still stay on the fringe of being recognized. ”
“This new album we’re working on hopefully will change that for all of us.”
Lifting his glass to mine, he clinks it. “Here’s to the success of Ruby Frax!”
“Hear-hear,” I agree, taking a drink. Then return to my sandwich.
Damn. This is delicious. Before I know it, I’ve eaten the entire first half of the French dip and a good majority of my fries. There’s something so good about dipping the crinkle fries into the house fry sauce that I can’t get enough of.
Jax’s phone buzzes on the table.
Immediately, I know it must be from Sloane, if the goofy grin on his face says anything. When he looks up, he asks, “You in for a bonfire with the Lancasters tonight?”
“I… uh… haven’t really been invited,” I admit.
Rolling his eyes, he types something into his phone, then looks to me. “This is me inviting you.”
“But Raven…” I start, however Jax quickly interrupts.
“Please don’t take this the wrong way. But as one of my closest friends, there’s something you need to know.”
Chewing on his lower lip, he waits until he has my full attention.
The longer he stares, the faster my heart rate increases. Fuck, does he know our entire relationship is a farce? Does he know something about her I don’t?
When his silence nearly kills me, I prod him along. “Out with it, Jax. I’m sure there’s not much you can say that I don’t already know.” Well, there is, but nothing I’d be surprised over if I’m being honest.
“Again… this has nothing to do with you,” he assures me. “But… geez, how do I say this? Well… Raven… she… uh… doesn’t let a lot of people in. She’s more of a short timer when it comes to relationships.”
“Okay…” I draw out, wondering where he’s going with this.
“Well, the two of you… your paths are gonna cross frequently. I’d just hate to see you hurt.”
“Wait, you’re more concerned that she’s gonna break my heart?
Shouldn’t your warning be the other way around, given that you’re marrying her sister?
” I ask defensively, though who I’m defending at this point is still up in the air.
I know he’s only trying to warn me, but I don’t like him talking shit about her either.
Oh, what a tangled web we weave…
“Man, I’ve seen the way you look at her when you think no one’s watching. You like her.”
“So what if I do?” There’s no point in denying it. If he’s got an in with her, maybe he’ll help me convince her to eliminate the fake part of this relationship.
“Raven… well… she’s been known to keep guys at bay. She’s not a player… more of a serial monogamist… but she doesn’t let guys get too close.”
Cocking my head to the side, I scrutinize his expression as I ask, “Why are you telling me this?”
“Well…” Jax takes a moment to consider his words. “One, you’re my friend. Now that we’ve formed Ruby Frax, you’re gonna be around. It’s evident you like her, and I don’t want to see either of you hurt. But two … if I’m right… I think she likes you, too. But she won’t admit it.”
What the fuck? Are we in middle school?
Why the hell does this bit of information suddenly give me hope?
Should I break her confidence and just tell him about our arrangement, or do I get his take on getting her to consider more? I really like Raven and even though we had an explosive start, I know it goes far beyond a physical connection.
That last thing he said though… I need to know more.
“What makes you so sure she likes me?”
Jax suddenly looks as if he’s sucked on a lemon; his face scrunches and almost looks pained. “Please don’t take this the wrong way, but you’re spending time with her outside of a bedroom. You’re more than just a physical connection for her.”
Rage infuriates me. Instantly, I come to her defense. “Do you really think that little of Raven?”
Now it’s his turn to backpedal. “God, no. I love her to the ends of the earth. But she’s been known among her sisters for being open to sex-only situationships.
She’s not promiscuous, and exclusive while they’re together, but she doesn’t stick with any guy long-term.
And before you say anything—” he cuts me off.
“There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Trust me, I don’t have any double standards when it comes to men and women enjoying each other and playing the field. You’re all single and what you do is your business—no judgement here.”
“What is your point?” I grind out through gritted teeth. My patience is running thin, and he’s skating on very thin ice when it comes to my tolerance for talking about Raven’s sex life. He’s right. It’s none of his business.
“Look, man…” His tone softens. “Next week, I’m marrying Sloane.
She’s not only her twin sister but her best friend.
Sloane knows Raven better than anyone. But she also worries that Raven will never open herself up to love.
She has no idea what her hangups are but as one of my best friends , I don’t want to see you get in too deep, only to have her cut you loose, if you know what I mean.
Raven’s a bolter… and I… well, I guess this is my way of giving you fair warning. ”
“Any suggestions on changing that for her?” flies out of my mouth before I realize what I’m asking. What the fuck? We’re supposed to be fake dating. I wait on bated breath as he ponders my question, not knowing why his answer suddenly matters so much.
“I know you’re good with casual. Hell, you’re a musician who travels all over the world.
We’re known for being the kings of casual.
But if things are going in the different direction, like I think they are, if I wanted more with her, I’d keep showing up.
Keep making her laugh. Keep making her see there’s no reason to run when things get real.
Hell, show her things are real. I don’t think anyone’s ever done that, according to Sloane.
Raven always finds one excuse or another to keep guys at bay.
I personally like you for her and hope things work out. ”
Thoughts twist through my mind like a tornado.
Is what we have just casual? Do I even want more with Raven?
This isn’t supposed to be serious. Hell, we are FAKE DATING, I practically scream at myself.
But why does the thought of losing her make me feel as if my insides are being ripped out by a bulldozer?