Chapter Eight
Eight
Simon
I had no idea why I found this so offensive, but I did. Me? A lawyer? Did I seem like the litigious type? Maybe it was because I was so beaten down by the corporate rat race I’d been living in for the past eight years.
At the time, I’d assumed I’d be able to pursue my art as a side hustle, that the job was just temporary until my art paid me enough to survive and provide for Charlie, but somehow there was never time for that.
“You say ‘attorney’ like it’s a bad thing, O’Malley,” Hannah said, bringing my attention back to her.
I tipped my head to the side. “You essentially called me an ambulance chaser. How could that be construed as a good thing?”
“I did not!” she protested, yet her grin was wide and her eyes glinted with mischief. “How was I to know you had such preconceived negative feelings for attorneys? Maybe I’m one.”
“Didn’t you tell me you live in your van and post about it online?” I asked. “That doesn’t seem like a successful law practice.”
“Nice to see you’re a good listener.” She propped her chin on her hand. “I truly meant no offense.”
Thunder boomed. Lightning flashed. I wondered if it was the universe calling her out in a fib and would have said so but Dude started to wail and shiver and my attention was diverted.
I wrapped my arms around him, trying to soothe him.
Poor guy. Hannah left her spot and joined us.
She sat beside me, so close that the coconut-lime scent of her shampoo flirted with my nose.
She was deliciously curvy and the press of her soft body against my arm caused my brain to fritz. How long had it been since I’d dated a woman for more than the occasional hookup? Longer than I could remember. Well, that was depressing as hell.
Dude wriggled across my lap until he was on Hannah’s as well. We held him tight and whispered soothing words. His shivering eased but as the storm overhead raged, he let out a beleaguered moan that pulled at my heartstrings.
“I think we should sing him a song,” Hannah said.
I lifted my eyebrows. I refused to get bamboozled by the riot of dark curls that surrounded her heart-shaped face.
With her big eyes, upturned nose, and wide smile, she looked guileless in the candlelight, but I wasn’t fooled.
Hannah Spencer was the sort of woman who snuck into a man’s heart by inches and the next thing the poor guy knew he was smitten and doing all sorts of dumb things, like singing to a dog in the middle of a housebreaker of a storm.
I opened my mouth to flat-out refuse but what came out instead was, “Does Dude like rock and roll or is he more of a pop guy?”
Hannah’s grin about split her face in two. “He loves Taylor Swift.”
“Of course he does.” I rolled my eyes. I didn’t believe her for a hot minute. Still, I accepted it for the challenge it was, cleared my throat and sang about rain in the bedroom, as it seemed appropriate, and everything being wrong.
“Ah!” Hannah cried. “That’s from ‘Forever & Always’! O’Malley, are you a Swiftie?”
“No, absolutely not. However, my baby sister is and she has been since 1989 came out. Anything I’ve picked up is entirely her fault because I was in a hostage situation driving her to and from school, but given our current circumstance, it seemed on point.”
Hannah laughed and then leaned down and crooned the song in its entirety into Dude’s ear and damned if he didn’t relax against us, making him even heavier and cutting off the circulation to the lower half of my body, which, given how it was responding to Hannah’s nearness, wasn’t a bad thing.
From that song, we stayed with the rain theme and moved on to “Here Comes the Rain Again” by the Eurythmics, “Purple Rain” by Prince, “Umbrella” by Rihanna, and “November Rain” by Guns N’ Roses.
It was quite an eclectic mash-up, and when we didn’t know the words, we hummed until Dude met our duet with a deep snore.
We glanced at each other with our mouths open in a silent whoop of success. Hannah leaned closer to me and whispered so softly her breath stroked my ear. “We did it, O’Malley. Also, I think his gummy kicked in.”
It was impossible not to smile at least a little. My life had offered me a lot of challenging moments, but singing a Great Dane to sleep with this woman in the middle of a storm was one of the better ones. I found myself softening toward her but immediately checked the feeling.
“I think the worst of it has passed.” I shifted, putting some space between us. “You can take the bedroom upstairs. I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“How do I know you’re not hoping another tree will hit the house and take me out?”
I put my hand over my chest in mock pain. “You wound me.”
A small smile curved her mouth but it disappeared as her gaze narrowed. “Just so you know, I have a gun and I’m not afraid to use it.”
I looked her up and down. Over the years, working in insurance, which did not bring out the best in people, I’d come to read my fellow man and woman pretty well. Hannah gave off a be kind vibe the likes of which I rarely met in my line of work.
I scoffed. “You don’t have a gun.”
“All right, fine. It’s a T-shirt cannon that a friend gave me for protection, but I do know how to use it.”
That was unexpected. I blinked and then an actual huff of amusement came out of me, causing Dude to snuffle and snort in his sleep. Hannah kissed his head and said, “I’m going to grab some stuff from the van. Will you stay with Dude?”
“Sure.” It was still raining but the thunder rumbles and lightning strikes were few and far between. “Do you need help?”
“Nah, I’m just grabbing some dinner for Dude. Speaking of dinner, how do you feel about peanut butter and jelly?”
“PB and J? Huge fan,” I said. “Of course, right now I’m hungry enough to eat belly button lint and toenail clippings so…”
She gagged. “Sorry, I’m fresh out. You’ll have to make do with an Uncrustable with apple slices on the side.”
“My taste buds will endeavor to adjust.”
She wiggled out from under Dude and strode for the door.
As it closed behind her, I rubbed Dude’s soft ears and thought about how different the past few days were from what I’d expected.
I’d thought I’d be alone dealing with the cottage and my grief.
Instead, I had a Great Dane in my lap and a feisty woman offering me PB and J sandwiches.
Dude let out a satisfied yawn and his eyes rolled back as I continued to rub his head in small soothing circles and crooned nonsense words of comfort to him.
I glanced at the carving of the bluebird on the table and the bird’s expression was so like Gramps when he was feeling particularly cantankerous that I felt a sharp stab of missing him spear my chest. I knew without a doubt that he would laugh his ass off at me, sitting here on the floor of his cottage with Dude while trying to manage a wild-haired woman who was not at all on board with my plan for the house.
I was about to heave a beleaguered sigh when the door banged open and in strode Hannah.
Her arms were full and I pushed Dude off and rose to help her.
She had two camping lanterns and a bag of groceries that had two enormous dog dishes poking out of the top.
I had no idea how much Great Danes ate but judging by the size of these bowls, it was impressive. I grabbed the bag.
Hannah set one of the lanterns down on the coffee table and switched it on. “Let there be light!”
The entire room was immediately bathed in a soft yellow glow. It was then that I noticed the rocket launcher she had strapped to her back.
“You were serious?” I gaped.
“I never joke about my T-shirt cannon,” she said.
She swung it around and pointed it at the ceiling while she braced her other hand on her hip, striking a pose like a military leader calling out maneuvers.
With her curls framing her face and her tank top hugging her impressive curves, she was seriously the hottest thing I’d seen in a very long time.
I shook my head, trying to clear her image from my mind.
Nothing good would come of me being warm for the form of my new housemate.
“I will maintain a healthy perimeter.” I raised my hands in a surrender gesture.
“I’m sure you will.” She grinned and set the cannon down, propping it against the back of the couch. “Come on, Dude, it’s dinnertime.”
Dude glanced from his safe space to her, obviously feeling conflicted. She patted her thigh and coaxed him with encouraging words but he didn’t move until she said, “Sirloin tips.”
He rose and pressed up against her side, pushing her toward the kitchen while maintaining contact with her at all times.
“Not to be a complainer,” I said as I followed with the bag of groceries. “But why does he get sirloin tips while we’re having PB and J?”
Hannah reached into the bag I set on the counter and pulled out a can of dog food. “I’m sure Dude wouldn’t mind sharing if you’d like.”
The can was a gourmet brand of dog food that was labeled “sirloin tips in gravy.” My stomach actually growled. I would have been embarrassed but I was too hungry to care.
“Here.” Hannah handed me a box of premade sandwiches with the crusts cut off. “Eat before you become faint with hunger.”
She didn’t have to tell me twice. Still, I had manners. While she found a can opener and prepped Dude’s food and water, I scrounged plates and divvied up the sandwiches and sliced the apples, trying to make a meal out of what I would normally consider a sad kid’s school lunch.
When Hannah patted Dude on the head and left him to his bowl of chow, I handed her a plate. She glanced at the arrangement of apple slices around the sandwiches. “Oh, fancy, O’Malley.”
Inexplicably, I felt my face grow warm at her teasing. “It’s all about presentation, Spencer.”
I led the way back to the living room. We sat on the recliners and used the coffee table to hold our plates. Hannah doubled back to the kitchen and returned with two bottles of water.
The storm continued to rumble intermittently overhead. I picked up one of the round crustless sandwiches and took a bite. I managed to devour it in two and had to admit it was tasty. I held up the second one. “Where have these been all my life?”
“They’re my go-to when I just don’t feel like cooking dinner,” Hannah said. She went to take a bite of hers and out of nowhere an enormous maw opened and snatched it out of her fingers.
“Dude!” she cried, holding her hand in the air as if she couldn’t believe that it was empty. “That is completely unacceptable behavior, mister.”
Dude lowered his head, looking abashed even as he tried to work the peanut butter off the roof of his mouth.
Hannah pointed to his pillow fort. “You’re in timeout.”
The big boy skulked around the coffee table to the mound of pillows and used his snout to nudge one aside so he could belly-crawl under it. Thunder boomed and he scooted faster. Because he was next to me, I reached out and patted his hindquarter, letting him know I was here for him.
“Don’t let him snooker you,” Hannah said. “If he’s brave enough to snatch my dinner, he’s not that scared.”
She picked up her remaining sandwich and took a bite. I split my second in half and plopped it onto her plate. She smiled at me and said, “Thank you.”
“No need.” I polished off my half. “Without you, there’d be no dinner or dessert.” I bit into an apple slice.
“I suppose we’re going to have to figure this all out.” She tapped the stack of papers Vincent had left.
“Maybe we’ll have a clearer picture of what we want to do when we survey the storm damage tomorrow,” I suggested. What I did not say was that I planned to make it as discouraging as possible.
“That’s fair.” She nodded. We finished our apples and I took our plates to the sink. Given the lack of light, I figured they could wait until tomorrow.
“You can have the bedroom upstairs,” Hannah said. “I don’t think I’m going to be able to get Dude out of his pillow fort until after the storm passes.”
She said it pleasantly enough but I knew when I was being dismissed.
As a woman alone in a small house with a strange man, I imagined she figured it was best to keep me contained on the upper floor while she and her dog and her T-shirt cannon staked out the room closest to the exit.
I could respect that. Survival of the fittest and all.
I checked the time on my phone and discovered it was later than I’d thought. I took the lantern Hannah offered to light the way upstairs. I was halfway up when Dude let out a mournful moan. I stopped and spun around.
Hannah shook her head. “He’ll be fine.”
As if to mock her, thunder cracked overhead at a sonic-boom level and Dude let out a howl that rivaled the storm. “Okay, okay, I’m coming back.”
I jogged down the stairs. Dude wagged his tail so hard it thumped against the couch, doing triple time. Hannah looked at Dude and then at me. “Flip you a coin for the couch?”