Chapter 27 – Raelyn
Chapter Twenty-Seven
RAELYN
“Come out and play, sissy!” Erika calls from the terrace.
The yellow ribbons in her hair fly out behind her as she dances around, waving a wand made of pink and purple silk streamers.
I desperately want to play outside with her, but Papa told me to stay indoors.
It’s not safe outside under the sun. I can’t remember, but he’s told me many times how sick I get if I don’t obey. But Papa isn’t home.
Chessa whines for no discernible reason, and I roll my eyes as the governess attempts to distract her.
I try to focus on the puzzle in front of me, but my attention keeps getting pulled back to Erika dancing on the terrace with the wind in her hair, her skin aglow from the sun. It’s not fair.
“Why don’t you play outside with Erika?” the governess asks Chess.
“I’m bored. Take me to my dolls. Now,” Chess demands.
Gods, five-year-old Chess is almost more insufferable than four-year-old Chess,
but maybe this will work in my favor.
The governess mutters something under her breath as she leads Chessa toward her room. “Keep an eye on your sister,” she calls out to me.
As soon as she disappears, I rush to the door and poke my head out. A tiny part of me worries what will happen if I break Papa’s rule, but then again, the governess told me to watch Erika. I’m the big sister—it’s my responsibility.
I stick my slippered foot out the door, waiting for something bad to happen, but when all I feel is a pleasant warmth from the sun, I jump out onto the terrace.
“Sissy!” Erika cries and flings her arms around me.
“Do you want to dance with me? I’m pretending to be at one of Mama and Papa’s grand balls.
I’m the new princess!” She twirls around and around, and I can’t help but laugh and join her.
After the king stopped by with Prince Kian earlier today, she’s been convinced she’s going to be a princess someday.
She gives me a turn with the ribbon wand, and as I twirl it around me, it almost appears as if light is dancing off the ribbons. Prismatic rainbows reflect off the windows and the glass lanterns hanging around the terrace, and Erika oohs and ahhs at the light display.
“My turn!” she cries out and grabs the wand from me, but when she dances, the sun is no longer shooting out the beams of light.
She pouts. “What did you do? Did you break it?”
At a loss, I shrug and continue dancing around the courtyard, enjoying the warmth of the sun on my skin. How can this be bad when it’s so warm and comforting?
“Raelyn!” my mother’s voice shrieks from the manor. “Get inside this instant!”
“Sorry, Erika,” I say as I run back.
My very pregnant, very angry mother stands next to my puzzle, her hands on her hips and her eyes alight with fire. “Have you lost your mind?” she yells. “You know the rules! If your father were to find out what his child had done, he’d send you away.”
In a fit of rage, she sweeps the puzzle I’d been working on for days onto the floor, and I cry out in frustration. All my hard work is gone. I crash to my knees and attempt to salvage any pieces that remain locked in place.
“Go to your room,” Mother commands.
“But can’t—”
“Now!” she screams.
Tears stream down my face, and I try to brush them away as I rush toward the stairs.
Mother never has a kind word for me. Sometimes I think she wishes I’d never been born.
I’ve seen the way she dotes on the twins and the way she warmly rubs her belly.
What I wouldn’t give for her to hold me and explain why there are different rules for me.
Why does the sun make me sick? I look down at my skin, and other than being a little pink from the heat of dancing around, it looks normal.
Something warm and hard is around my waist. My eyes fly open, and I’m immediately disoriented, both from the strange dream that felt like a memory and my new location. Wasn’t I by the fire? My stockinged feet curl and flex as my body wakes up.
The extremely muscled arm banded around me and the silk pillow under my head tell me that I’ve been relocated to a bed—a very comfortable and luxurious one at that. One would think I’d panic at the fact that a man’s arm is around me, but instinctively, I know it’s Kian.
Why in Luna’s name he’s in bed with me is a question I will have to ask when he awakens.
For now, his soft, even breaths tickle the back of my neck, and I’m afraid to move for fear it will disturb him—and shockingly, I’m really enjoying this.
It’ll never happen again, but still, it’s not altogether unpleasant.
A low growl comes out of Kian, and I stiffen.
Did I move too much? He pulls me closer, and .
. . yes, that’s an erection pressing against my backside.
A flush of warmth heats my cheeks, but no.
That’s completely normal for men, right?
I try to think back to the stories Sera told me about her conquests, recalling how much they’d made me blush and also feel a tiny bit jealous.
Kian moves again, and I think I feel lips on the back of my neck. He moves his arm, and then there’s a hand pressed against my stomach. I’m a bundle of nerves and butterflies as his hand dips lower.
Okay! That’s enough. I grab his hand, fling it away from me, and promptly roll away from my husband.
“Rae?” a sleep-addled voice says. “Oh shit, did I do something wrong?”
I sit up and look down at my dazed and confused husband. “No, everything’s fine. I just need to get up to use the privy.”
Kian smiles sleepily and stretches his arms overhead. “I’m sorry for moving you without asking. I thought you’d be more comfortable here.”
I blush, pushing a strand of hair behind my ear. “It was very comfortable, thank you.” A yawn overtakes me, and I cover my mouth with my hand. “What time do you think it is?”
Kian glances at the window. “I’d guess it’s late afternoon by now.”
I laugh. “We must have been tired.”
“Well, it was an eventful night to say the least.”
“I’ll be right back,” I say and hop out of bed, running to the bathing room to take care of my needs.
My face is completely flushed when I look into the mirror. I feel lazy for sleeping the entire day away, but my body clearly needed it.
Oh hells. I palm my face. I completely forgot to take my tonic.
I’ll need to see about procuring more, but I have to admit, I’m not completely sure what’s in it.
I accidentally skipped a few doses here and there in the last month, and it didn’t seem to negatively affect me or make me feel all that different, which begs the question—why does my father insist on me taking it?
“Kian?” I call out as I re-enter his room. “Do you know where my satchel is?”
Kian responds from the sitting room, “It’s in here, love.”
I pad into the sitting area to find Kian lounging in a leather armchair, a drink in hand. “Would you like some?”
“No thanks.” I shake my head and glance around the room, finally spotting my satchel. After digging around, I pull out the single vial of tonic.
“What’s that?” Kian asks.
“My tonic.”
Kian chuckles. “A contraceptive tonic?”
My eyes flash to his, cheeks heating with embarrassment. “No! I mean, I don’t know?”
Kian frowns. “What do you mean you don’t know? You’re about to take a tonic and you’re not even sure what it does?” The incredulity in his voice makes me feel rather foolish.
I shrug, almost helplessly. “My father has been making me take it for as long as I can remember. He says if I don’t, it will make me sick . . . I’ve only missed it a few times and so far nothing bad has happened . . . but I’m not sure if I should risk it.”
Kian sets his glass of amber liquid down and strides over to me. “May I?”
I nod, and he holds the golden tonic up to the light.
“Perhaps one of our alchemists can determine what it’s for and replicate it if necessary. Who prepared it at home?”
“Our chef always had it for me, but I’m not actually sure where he got it from. I never thought to ask.”
“Ah, sweet Rae, so trusting now, aren’t we?”
Trying not to feel defensive, I roll my shoulders back and feign confidence I don’t really have. “Why would my father give me something I don’t actually need?”
Kian flicks my nose. “I’m just teasing, love. No need to get riled up.”
The truth is, after the lies Stepmother exposed, a part of me wonders what other falsehoods my father has told and if there are other surprises awaiting me.
My mind flashes back to my unexpected taste for blood, and with sudden clarity, I realize that all the strange experiences I’ve been having center on me either forgetting to take my tonic, tasting blood, or being out in the sun.
Is it all connected somehow? I’m almost afraid to think the words.
It’s utterly ludicrous. There’s no possible way.
“Where did you go?” Kian asks. “You slipped away.”
I shake my head. “I’m sorry . . . I’m just dealing with all of these changes, and it’s quite overwhelming. I’m also not really used to being with someone else this much. I was mostly left alone at home.”
“Already sick of me?” Kian winks. “Should I leave you alone?”
“Oh gods, no.” I blush. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel unwelcome in your own rooms.”
He laughs. “It’s quite all right.”
“Speaking of rooms . . . where might mine be? Are the maids preparing one nearby?”
“About that . . .” Kian winces, and I go on alert.
“What?” I hold my breath.
“I think we need to hold off on separate rooms for the time being. My father is quite suspicious of us, and if he finds I’ve stuck you in another wing of the palace already, our entire plan falls apart.”
“But I can’t seriously share a bed with you!”
“We already did. Was it so bad?” Kian asks.
“We were fully clothed and it was during the day!”
“So?”
“So . . . that’s completely different,” I stammer. He might be used to waking up next to women, but it was a whole new experience for me having him pressed up against me . . . his touch causing my pulse to race and invoking all sorts of other feelings we can’t act on.
Kian folds his arms and leans against his chair. “I’d love to hear your reasoning on this.”
“We’re not actually ‘together,’” I whisper-shout. “Marriage on paper only, remember?”
Kian frowns. “I’m trying to protect you from my father, Rae. It might be a little uncomfortable right now, but it won’t be forever. Soon enough, he’ll forget about us.”
I scoff. “Sure.”
He runs a hand through his hair. “I’ll keep my hands off, I promise.”
“Like you did today?” I throw back at him.
His eyes widen. “What did I do? Surely if I touched you, I’d remember.”
I roll my eyes. “You were asleep.”
“Well, that’s disappointing. I’m jealous of myself.”
I shake my head. “You’re ridiculous. My point is, how do I know you’re not going to keep doing that.”
“I didn’t realize my touch would be so unpalatable to you.”
I blush but try to cover it up. “That’s not what I said, and you know it. I just don’t want to confuse things between us. We made an agreement, and we should honor it. If you need to be close to me in public, that’s fine, but when we’re alone, hands off.”
Kian blows out a breath. “You’re a difficult woman.”
“Thank you.”
“That wasn’t a compliment.”
“It was to me,” I say.
His lips quirk into a half smile. “Well, we need to make an appearance at dinner tonight, so be prepared to be touched.”
“Why does that sound like a threat?”
Kian shrugs. “Take it as you will.” He downs the remainder of his drink, then nods at the door. “I’ll bring your tonic to the alchemist and see about making more for you if that’s all right.”
“Fine with me.”
He swipes it off the table and saunters past. I hate that my eyes are drawn to his incredible backside as he walks out the door.
I’m in trouble.
An hour or so later, there’s a knock at the door, and a familiar face peeks in.
“Sera?” I practically squeal.
“Raelyn!” she cries out and runs in, tackling me in an embrace.
“Gods, I thought I’d never see you again.” Emotion clogs my throat as I choke out the words.
“I almost didn’t believe it when the messenger came!
” Sera exclaims. “This job is a dream come true, Raelyn, thank you so much. You have no idea how much of a difference this will make for my family.” Her eyes are filled with tears, which makes mine tear up, and suddenly, we’re both crying, blubbering messes, trying to catch up on the time we’ve missed.
“Thank you so much for coming, Sera. It’s already more like home having you here.”
“Are you kidding me? I wouldn’t have said no for anything. Working in the palace? This is insane. I can’t believe you actually married the prince!”
“Yes, it’s quite shocking to say the least. I’m just relieved to finally be away from Stepmother. And also, can I just profusely apologize for any time I took you for granted? Your work is so incredibly challenging.”
Sera smiles, wiping a tear off my cheek with her thumb. “You were always loving and kind to me. You’re family, even if you need me to take care of you.”
I let out a weak laugh and pull her back in for another hug.
“Okay now, enough crying. I need to get you ready for dinner, right?”
I shrug. “I suppose so.”
“Well, let’s make you look like the princess you now are.”
My face blanches. “I forgot about that part. Will I have to wear a tiara?”
Sera laughs. “Don’t you worry about a thing, my lady. I’ve got you.”
“You know you’re my only friend, right?”
Sera sighs and pats my cheek. “I know, but I wish I weren’t. You deserve to have other people in your life who love and accept you for who you are. I think this change will be good for you.”
“I sure hope so.”