Chapter 14
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
KNOX
After my brother left, Gage decided to put Sally Ann on a leash and walk back down the driveway to the main road where the bus would drop Aiden off.
I could tell by his twitchy eyebrow and stiff shoulders that Gage didn’t want company, and I was tempted to push the issue, but I didn’t.
Not knowing what was going on in his head was driving me crazy, though.
Having Gage so close but so closed off was like the sun going behind a cloud. I hadn’t realized how bright and warm his presence had made my life until that light had dimmed.
And Jesus fucking Christ, since when had I become the sort of person who thought shit like that? Since the day Gage had walked into my life, that was when.
I clomped up the steps to the farmhouse kitchen and let myself in the back door.
The room smelled like vanilla candles and something cooking in the crockpot.
A few dishes were piled in the sink, and one whole end of the table was covered in papers and Webb’s laptop.
The place looked homey. Lived-in. Comforting.
Or it should have been. But something was off. It wasn’t as comforting as it usually was.
“Knox! You’re back early,” Uncle Drew said from a stool at the island where he sat chopping apples with his foot propped up. “How’d Gage’s interview go?”
“No idea.” I poured myself a mug of coffee from the pot on the counter.
Uncle Drew frowned. “No idea? But… he didn’t tell you? That’s not like him. Is he upset?” I felt the weight of Drew’s stare on the back of my neck. “What did you do?”
I took out a spoon, mostly for the satisfaction of slamming the drawer. “I don’t know why you assume him being upset is my fault.”
“And what about you being upset?”
“I’m not. I just… have a lot of things on my mind.”
This wasn’t a lie. I did have plenty of stuff to worry about.
For example, I’d called Rick when Gage was doing his interview, but he hadn’t answered or returned my call.
Since I’d been calling to reassure myself that I was still a crucial member of the Bormon Klein Jacovic team, that hadn’t exactly been reassuring.
But from the moment I’d picked Gage up and seen him so distraught, I hadn’t really given my own career—or anything else—another thought.
I wanted to pull out my phone and text Jason, but I didn’t think Gage would take too kindly to me saying, “What the fuck did you do to the guy who calls himself my boyfriend that made him not speak to me or act like my boyfriend anymore?”
Instead, I slid onto the stool across from Drew.
Gage couldn’t have been upset about the interview, I was almost sure. His references were stellar. His academic record was flawless. And Jason had been one tiny nudge from hiring Gage sight unseen.
Gage had said it was sorta my fault, so had Jason told him something bad about me? I couldn’t imagine what. Gage knew I was bi and that I wasn’t remotely a virgin, and anyway, Jason didn’t know the stupid shit I’d done in my twenties, unlike…
Fuck me.
Myles.
I took out my phone.
Myles, did you happen to see Gage today?
His reply was immediate.
Myles
Yup. He told me your apartment is on the market? Dude, since when? And where will you live in January? Are you and Gage getting a place? He seemed unsure.
Ah, fuck me twice.
We’ll catch up soon.
First, I needed to talk to Gage.
Aiden burst in the door a moment later, and I stood up, ready to drag Gage out to the barn apartment, but Aiden ran through the kitchen without a word and clomped up the stairs to his room.
“What’s up with him?” I asked Gage, who trailed after him.
He knelt to unleash Sally Ann and seemed to hesitate for a second, and then he sighed. “Aiden’s mom was there. Out by the road.”
“What?” Drew demanded.
Gage looped the leash around his hand in a tight coil.
“I had my phone out to track Aiden on the Pond App while he was on the bus, mostly to see how well it worked. And the bus got to the end of the driveway before I did, because Miss Thing here had to smell every blade of grass. So I expected him to start walking and meet me… but he didn’t.
Instead, he walked west a hundred feet or so.
When I got to the road, he was talking to a woman with Connecticut plates.
I called his name, and he got startled. He ran toward me, all bug-eyed, and begged me not to tell his dad.
” He grimaced. “He said he knew better than to go in the car with her anymore, and he didn’t want his dad upset like he was last time. ”
“Ugh,” Drew said. “The poor kiddo.”
“Well, we can’t keep it from Webb,” I told him.
Gage rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I know.”
“I mean, I get what Aiden’s trying to do, and it’s sweet, I suppose, but man. So misguided. It’s not his job to protect Webb. Webb is an adult.”
“Yes,” Gage said with an edge to his voice. “I know.”
“And the situation is dangerous. I know Aiden loves his mom, but that doesn’t mean he should be with her. She could be endangering him. Like, actually physically endangering him. And she’s for sure endangering his mental health.”
Gage tilted his head to the side. “Do we really want to talk about secrets that endanger our mental and physical health, Sunday?”
I opened my mouth to retort, found that my brain had absolutely no retort coming, and shut it again with a clack.
“Uncle Drew, Gage and I have things to discuss.” I grabbed Gage by the elbow and dragged him to the door. “Would you fill Webb in about Amanda when he gets home?”
“Excuse me, what if I don’t want to discuss anything with you?” Gage demanded once we’d reached the porch.
“Too bad. You’re wrong, and I’m going to set you right.”
Gage laughed, and it was an ugly sound. “I was wrong about something, that’s for damn sure.” He yanked his elbow away from me. “Fine. Let’s do this.” He stomped up the stairs as loudly as Aiden and threw open the door so hard it slammed against the wall.
“Okay, first off,” I began before he could. “My situation with my family is nothing like the situation with Aiden and his mom.”
“Bullshit,” Gage said, arms folded and nose in the air.
“It’s more similar than you want to admit.
You lied to Webb so he wouldn’t worry. You want to go back to a job that is incredibly unhealthy for you mentally and physically, even though the whole reason you came here was because your doctor advised you to! ”
“That’s only partly true, and I never meant for the move to be permanent.
” I ran both hands through my hair in frustration.
“You wanna know how I ended up back in Vermont? I was at my condo, on day three of my hundred-day sabbatical, and I was already about to bang my head against the wall out of sheer boredom. You know I don’t have hobbies, right?
I don’t have guilty pleasures. And all of a sudden, I didn’t have a single fucking purpose in my life either.
Legit, nobody needed me for anything. My friends were working, I’m pretty sure my job thought I was a liability, and I felt worthless.
Like my life was over. And that feeling was worse than the panic attacks, because that felt fucking permanent. ”
My hands shook, and I curled them into fists. Gage was still giving me a folded-arm glare, but his eyes had softened in sympathy.
Sympathy was way too close to pity, though, so I turned away and stared out the window at the sky beyond the orchard and the hay bale maze.
“That morning, Uncle Drew called. He’d hurt his ankle, and he couldn’t get out to the office to do the bills.
Webb was already so busy, and the finances were complicated, and could I recommend someone to help them out?
And I… I saw a way that I could have a little value to someone, at least, while I was taking my sabbatical.
So I told Drew and the others about my panic attacks.
I said I needed to leave the city and destress.
I asked if I could stay here, and they said, ‘Hell, yes. Of course, come home.’”
“Because they love you.”
I nodded without turning around. “So I packed up my car and ran back here, and after one look at the books—and I mean literally one peek before Webb was all, ‘No, Knox, you’re here to relax and recuperate’—I saw that Sunday Orchard was standing at a financial precipice.
The business had been profitable, but I told you about Webb’s divorce, right?
When Webb had to pay off Amanda, he had to take that money from the business, which meant that he was operating without a safety net, with no money to do the kind of upgrades he’d need to stay competitive.
I needed to give him the money without making it seem like a gift, since you know how fucking proud he is, so I…
” I stumbled over my words. “I got the idea to tell him I wanted to buy back into the business. My dad left Sunday Orchard to Webb, because this place has always been Webb’s baby and he deserved it more than I did, but I told Webb I’d changed my mind.
That I wanted to pay to have a share again. ”
Gage sucked in a breath.