Chapter 15 #2
I see your irony there, Universe. Well played.
“And if Jason finds someone else for the position in the meantime?”
My heart beat faster for a second because I hated to lose, but when I thought about not working at Rubicon, I didn’t feel a sense of panic or sadness.
I yawned. “If he hires someone else, then it wasn’t meant for me. I deserve a job that I’m excited about.”
“Good.” Knox pulled me against him and rubbed a soothing hand down my back. In no time, my eyes shut, and my mind drifted.
In that hazy space between sleep and wakefulness, Knox’s lips brushed my forehead. “Don’t settle for anything less than perfection, love,” he whispered.
Or maybe I dreamed it.
The next time I woke up, it was to a cold bed and a milky-white morning light. I threw the covers back with a groan and eased myself out of bed, stretching my hands up to crack my spine.
“Knox was right. Old age does stalk me,” I muttered to the empty apartment.
The distinct chill in the air had me running toward the bathroom to turn on the hot water in the shower. Once I was clean and feeling marginally more human, I put on Knox’s big Hannabury sweatshirt, jeans, and boots, grabbed some toast from the kitchen, and clomped downstairs to the office.
It seemed like the sky couldn’t commit fully to being cloudy or sunny and had stopped in this nebulous place that was neither.
I understood that on a spiritual level, because I felt like I should be happy—I’d been offered a killer job that I might still end up taking, I’d had six orgasms in thirty-six hours and my body was practically humming with endorphins, and breakfast was probably waiting for me in the farmhouse—but I couldn’t quite get there.
Despite all the sex, or maybe because of it, I felt kind of fragile.
I knew I needed to take a giant step back from Knox but also wanted him to, like, give me a giant hug and console me about that necessity, which would probably be counterproductive.
“Well, someone got out of bed early—” I began as I threw open the office door, but I broke off quickly because the office was empty.
Weird. Knox usually waited to walk to breakfast with me.
Maybe he was feeling off after last night, too.
I buried my hands in my pockets and walked across the parking area to the farmhouse. The wind sent dried leaves skittering across the gravel and whipped at the zombie army in the front yard.
“Morning, Gage!” Drew called from his stool by the kitchen island as I shut the back door. “Pancakes?”
“Yes, please.” I’d clearly missed the breakfast rush, because Drew and Webb were the only two Sundays in the room.
“We missed you at supper yesterday,” Webb said from his spot at the table. His words were easy, but his voice sounded concerned. “Knox said you were tired. Everything okay?”
That was a matter of opinion, wasn’t it?
“Oh, yeah. Everything’s fine,” I assured him, heading for the coffeepot. “Just a long day.”
“Knox wasn’t giving you a hard time, was he?” Webb stroked a hand over his beard the same way Knox sometimes did. “He likes you a lot, you know. I think he just… doesn’t know how to express it sometimes.”
I imagined the look on Webb’s face if he’d seen just how well Knox had expressed his like a few hours before.
“It’s okay, Webb. I promise.” I sipped my coffee. “Speaking of which, have you seen Knox this morning? I wanted to go over a couple things.”
That sounded way more profesh than saying I wanted a hug, right?
Webb and Drew exchanged a look.
“Knox went out to Jack’s place,” Webb said, and I expected him to get that smug little matchmakey look he usually got whenever he referred to Jack and Knox in the same sentence, but he didn’t.
“Ah. Working on the ramp?” I asked brightly, taking a seat across from Webb.
Webb shook his head. “That’s at his mom’s house.
No, Jack has a money pit of his own. He says he’s renovating it, though I’m pretty sure he’s just delaying its eventual collapse.
” He rolled his eyes with teasing affection.
“He doesn’t usually let anyone but Hawk come near the place—probably since Hawk’s too timid to tell Jack he should tear it down and start over—but they’re calling for October snow this afternoon and tonight, and there are a couple holes in the roof that need to be tarped over, which is a two-person job.
I would’ve gone, but I have another attorney meeting this morning. I offered to reschedule, but—”
“But neither Jack nor Knox would want that,” Drew said firmly, “which was why Knox volunteered.”
“Right. Aiden comes first,” I agreed, pretending the idea of a day without Knox to distract me from… Knox… didn’t leave me feeling completely blah.
“So, Knox said your interview yesterday went well?” Drew limped toward the table in his boot and set a huge stack of piping hot pancakes in front of me. “Apple cinnamon.”
“They smell terrific, thank you.” I took a huge bite and chewed it with total concentration, hoping Drew and Webb would move on to discuss something else, but they both watched me expectantly.
I swallowed. “Yeah, it went well. The company sounds amazing, but I had a couple concerns. Like, they would want me to learn to do things their way, which is fine, but…”
“But you don’t wanna become a cog in The Man’s corporate machinery.” Drew nodded approvingly. “Right on.”
Webb rolled his eyes. “You and Gage can go tie-dye something later, Uncle Drew. Let him finish.”
“No, he’s right. I just don’t know if I’m gonna get what I want out of the job. You guys have spoiled me, you know?”
“I think it’s great that you’re being particular,” Drew said.
“And not just because it means we get to keep you until the end of the year and have you finish our Pipsy app. Speaking of which, I’ve had a couple thoughts about that after talking with Norm Avery and Kathy Tinson—you know, from Tinson’s Berries.
Can I talk to you about that later today? ”
“Yeah, of course.” God. I wanted to stay for a few more months.
I liked everything about Little Pippin Hollow—this family that had adopted me, the food, the nice people in town, the food, the mountain views that were so different from home but had become familiar so fast, the work I was doing here, the food, and Knox.
More than anything, Knox.
But if I got any more comfortable here, how would I ever leave when it was time?
My phone chimed with a call, and I retrieved it from my sweatshirt pocket, hoping it was Knox and knowing it wasn’t.
“Oh.” I frowned when I realized it was Jason calling from Rubicon. I quickly explained to Webb and Drew before excusing myself to step out of the room. “Jason, hi.”
After a few pleasantries, Jason got right to the point, explaining that his boss was impressed enough with me to consider making some exceptions… as long as he could meet me in person.
Jason lowered his voice. “Between you and me, I think Max was impressed that you didn’t accept immediately. I think he might ask you to go to New York right away after all.” Then, more loudly, he said, “Would it be possible for you to come in for a second interview. Maybe today?”
I looked at the giant clock on the bookcase beside the television in the living room.
It was just after ten, which meant I could be there by two at the latest…
but I found myself curiously reluctant. I was supposed to meet with Drew in the afternoon to talk about Pipsy. And Knox would be back by then…
But he still wouldn’t be picking me to have a relationship with, I reminded myself firmly.
Not when he had his career to get back to.
Which was why I needed to rip this Band-Aid right the fuck off while I still could.
And what better way than by giving a second chance to the company that had picked me?
“Yeah, I could come down,” I agreed. “Maybe by two thirty?”
“Perfect,” Jason said. “We’ll see you then.”
I turned back toward the kitchen and found Webb and Drew standing in the doorway, watching me avidly.
“So? What’d he say?” Webb demanded.
“They want to improve on their job offer and allay my fears.” I snorted, still not totally able to believe it. “I’m going down to meet with them today.”
“Today?” Drew frowned. “Alone?”
I smiled gently. “I drove the whole way here from Florida, remember? And if I might be moving to the city, I should probably bite the bullet and learn to drive there, right? It was nice of Knox to take me the last couple times, but he, ah…” I swallowed. “He won’t be doing that forever.”
Drew shook his shaggy head. “It’s gonna snow in a couple hours, kiddo. Not the best day to be independent.” He was usually so easygoing that his worried expression gave me pause.
But then I pushed right through it. “Nah. I’ll be nearly to Boston by the time it starts snowing, and I’ll plan to get a hotel down there tonight. I’ll be back tomorrow or the next day. It’ll be a good thing,” I assured him. “You’ll see.”
Now I just needed to convince myself.