Chapter 5 #3
Hawk chewed on his lip for a long moment and was quiet for most of the hike back down the trail. When we got to the final half mile, he spoke up, and I could tell by his firm jaw that he’d thought himself around in circles until he’d ended right back in the angry place where he’d started.
“I understand what you’re saying about the money.
I know that’s a very real issue. But you’re letting that blind you.
You talk about oversight, but it feels like I’m the only one who’s bothering to look closely at this while everyone else is telling me to sit down and be quiet.
Letting Evola move forward with a proposal that has the word clear-cutting in it isn’t the right way to save the town or the mountain.
The development needs to be stopped before it ruins this place that my dad…
and lots of other people… love so much.”
I tried to hide my sigh of resignation. It was clear he was going to dig in and pick this as the literal hill to figuratively die on. He was expecting me to rethink my position but refused to rethink his own.
“Okay, then,” I gritted out.
His nostrils flared. “Don’t patronize me, Jack Davidson Wyatt.”
“Oh, we’re middle-naming now?” I ran my tongue over my teeth. “Fine. You’re spoiling for a fight, and I’m not gonna give it to you, Henry Hawkins Sunday. You can’t just keep things the way they are indefinitely because you’re scared that something bad could happen. That’s not how life works.”
“Well, I say it is.”
“And I said okay.”
Hawk lifted his jaw mulishly, and I wished I didn’t notice and appreciate how gorgeous he was even when he was being a stubborn ass, but I did. It seemed I couldn’t help noticing anymore, damn it.
I could tell Hawk wanted to argue until I agreed with him, but I refused.
Hawk was stuck in his own head. By his own admission, angry about everything on Earth.
And with our rock-solid friendship suddenly seeming incredibly fragile, getting into a rip-roaring debate was the last thing I wanted.
The town would make their decision one way or another in a few weeks, and maybe then Hawk could accept it.
“You heading home?” I asked when we reached the trailhead. “I’m planning to go back to the house and chill for the rest of the day. I think Death Comes to Pemberley is on tonight, and if you want to come over, we could—”
“Thanks, but I have plans.”
“Oh.” I stewed over this for several paces, then asked, “Date-type plans, or…?”
“Better.” Hawk paused long enough to give me a wide smile. “Crys and I are throwing knives.”
I nearly stumbled over my own feet and caught myself on the hood of my truck. “At each other?”
He snorted. “No! Honestly, your face right now. At a target. Crys knows a guy who knows a guy. He teaches courses and stuff. Should be fun. Even better than jiujitsu. Get that aggression out, like you said.”
“But…” I blinked. “You’re a pacifist. You hate weapons.
You cringe at the sight of blood. You cried at Hunger Games.
During the knife-throwing scene in Divergent, I thought you were going to vomit up the Skittles and popcorn you’d scarfed down while drooling over Theo James.
In that one Pride and Prejudice variation, Wickham held Lizzy at knifepoint, and it took two pints of mint chocolate chip to calm you down. ”
“Yeah, but this time, I’m the one with the knives, and that feels… different, somehow. It’s called broadening my horizons. About time I did that in lots of ways, don’t you think?” Hawk bumped his knuckles on the side of my truck twice before heading toward his own car. “See you tomorrow, boss.”
I watched uneasily as Hawk got into his car and drove away.
I didn’t want to be Chicken Little about the situation, but I couldn’t help thinking Hawk was having some kind of quarter-life crisis.
Picking fights? Planning to lose his virginity, possibly to a random stranger on a hookup app?
Turning down a viewing of a Pride and Prejudice-related movie so he could go knife throwing?
Someone needed to keep an eye on him. Someone besides me.
Someone like… Webb.
Yes. Webb would be perfect. I mean, okay, he’d lose his shit if he heard about Hawk’s cherry-popping plan, but rightly so because that plan was terrible. He’d sit Hawk down and…
I groaned. He’d probably try to put Hawk in a time-out or send him to bed without dessert like he was four instead of twenty-four. I didn’t want Hawk humiliated in the name of protection. Not to mention, Webb had zero experience with gay hookup apps.
Maybe Knox would be the better big brother to approach. Knox was experienced and levelheaded. He’d lived in Boston, for goodness’ sake. Surely he’d done the hookup thing dozens of times, if not hundreds. Maybe even… thousands.
I hesitated again.
Okay, possibly Knox had too much experience.
Gage, Knox’s boyfriend, would be the best bet.
Gage was Hawk’s age, so he wouldn’t treat Hawk like a kid.
He’d used hookup apps in the past, but he was also in a committed relationship with Knox, so he’d be able to explain the difference in a way I couldn’t.
He’d tell Hawk to slow down and not rush things. For his own good.
I started my truck and headed for Sunday Orchard, but instead of pulling into the main driveway between the farmhouse and the barn they’d converted into a gift shop, I headed around the back and parked in front of a small orange cottage at the rear of the property.
The Pumpkin House was at least a hundred years old—maybe older than the farmhouse where the rest of the family lived—but it had sat vacant for most of the time I’d lived in the Hollow, and I’d always thought it looked a little sad.
Now, though, the cottage was full of life, with freshly painted shutters, white curtains riffling in the summer breeze, and long columns of brightly colored flowers marching up the path to the front door.
In the side yard, Gage Goodman sprawled on a folding lounge chair in a pair of bright pink surf shorts and nothing else while his boyfriend mowed the lawn around him.
“Hey, Gage? Can I talk to you?” I asked above the loud buzz of the mower.
Gage opened one eye and peered at me. “Jack? Everything okay?”
“Yeah.” I hesitated. “Probably.”
Knox lifted his eyebrow at me from across the stretch of overgrown grass, but I shook my head and pointed at his boyfriend before taking a seat in the lawn chair next to Gage.
He reached for an iced coffee that had been hidden in the shade under his chair and took a deep slurp. “What’s up?”
“Well, the thing is…” Now that Gage’s dark eyes were on me, I shifted awkwardly.
Hawk would not be happy if he knew I was here.
I was trying to protect him, but he’d see it as me interfering or viewing him as a child when that was the opposite of my problem these days.
“If I tell you something, will you keep it between us? And, uh, Knox, I guess?”
Gage frowned. “Okay…”
“It’s Hawk…”
“Ohhh.” Gage sat up in his chair eagerly, lips tilted in a knowing smirk. “Oh, god, finally. I’ve been waiting months for you to open your eyes, man.”
I frowned. “You’ve noticed what’s going on with him?”
“Dude, the whole town has. Pretty sure only you and Webb have had blinders on. I think even the cows in the field know and are placing wagers with their bovine bookies about how long it would take you to catch on.” He looked at me seriously.
“Don’t let their big eyes fool you. Those cows are criminals.
Remember what happened when O’Henry Brush’s cattle got loose this spring? Tip of the iceberg, man.”
“Riiiight.” I began to doubt whether Gage had been the correct person to approach about this after all.
“You know there’s not a person in the Hollow who doesn’t adore Hawk,” Gage went on.
“He’s the heart and soul of this town. He deserves someone who appreciates all of him…
I mean, I don’t need to tell you, right?
” He chuckled and slapped my leg playfully.
“I am very on board for Hawk to get his happy ever after. How can I help?”
“Well.” I blinked. “I was thinking he could use a non-brother friend to help him navigate the, ah… the dating scene.”
Gage’s smirk faded into a confused frown. “The dating scene.”
“Yeah. That’s what we’re talking about, right? Hawk’s going through something right now that’s got him all twisted up, and he’s decided he needs to lose his… I mean… he’s decided he wants to try hookup apps.”
Gage’s jaw dropped, and he stared at me in blank horror.
I nodded grimly. “Thank you! At least someone understands how serious this is. I’ve tried to tell Hawk it’s a terrible idea, but he won’t listen. He’s confused. He actually…” I hesitated, then admitted, “He actually said he wants to sleep with me.”
Gage’s eyes widened comically. “He told you that? Hot damn, Hawkins.”
“He did. And I said no. Obviously.”
“Obviously,” Gage repeated faintly. Across the yard, the mower cut off. “Uh. Just so I understand… what’s so obvious about you saying no?”
“I’m too old for him. He works for me. I’m friends with his brothers.
And… I’ve never seen myself in a committed relationship.
That way lies madness.” I winced as Knox slid onto the lounge chair behind his boyfriend, wrapping his grass-coated arms around Gage’s waist and nuzzling the back of his neck.
“I mean, not madness for everyone. Not madness for you guys. Or Webb. Or… other people. But for me.”
“What’s going on, Goodman?” Knox mumbled into Gage’s hair.
“Oh, nothing much.” Gage linked his fingers with Knox’s. “Jack was just telling me he can’t sleep with Hawk because Hawk’s much younger than him, they work together, and he doesn’t see himself in a committed relationship.”
“Is that right?” Knox lifted his head and fixed me with a hard, green gaze… which was when I remembered that Gage Goodman was fifteen years his junior, and they’d met when Gage came to work for Sunday Orchard.