Chapter 7 #2
Bella’s smile was forced. Having to be back in that space with its new memories was something she might well try to avoid, but she was hardly likely to forget because she knew how hard it would be.
It was even harder than she’d imagined it would be, but in the turmoil of thoughts and feelings that even walking past the treadmill engendered, something happened to move her forward a step.
A new notion presented itself and it grew slowly over the next day or two, especially when Oliver relaxed a little as the normal routine of his life was re-established, uninterrupted by any challenge from Bella to revisit their impulsive connection.
When he could actually meet Bella’s gaze and exchange more than a few words with her, as though nothing untoward had even happened.
He’d sounded almost pleased to be talking to her today, in fact, when he’d been telling her about Wally’s surgery and how well it had gone.
The elderly man hadn’t regained consciousness yet so they couldn’t know whether there would be any lasting effects but, at the moment, things were looking good and they may well have given him a good few extra years.
Bella had been thrilled to hear the news, of course.
So thrilled that her plan took final shape and was clearly the way forward for her because it meant she would be able to retain her pride.
With a bit of luck, it might mean those little cracks in her heart from the pressure of unrequited love might heal as well.
The plan was centred on the fact that Bella was doing an exceptionally good job with Lady Dorothy.
Oliver would notice her record-keeping. He would notice the progress his mother was making over the next while, too.
Progress that could well speed up with the arrival of all those assistive devices that had been ordered with no expense spared.
Bella had no doubt that she could earn Oliver’s professional respect and, more importantly, his trust by doing her job so well that she would also be showing him she wasn’t about to run away from a challenge. Or the humiliation of knowing that she wasn’t appropriate.
Maybe that was because it wasn’t that humiliating. Bella knew perfectly well that there was no way she would ever fit into the Dawson world – but he’d proved she wasn’t undesirable and that more than made up for it. In a way, it gave her the power to control the feelings she had for Oliver.
Yes, they were inappropriate and couldn’t go anywhere but there was no doubt that there was a most delicious sexual frisson in the atmosphere every time Oliver was in the same room as she was.
It was there faintly from simply being in his house and while it was frustrating, it wasn’t unpleasant.
A bit like window shopping, perhaps, when you allowed yourself the pleasure of imagining that you were going to win the lottery soon and could actually buy anything you wanted.
Last night had been the clincher. Oliver had come out into the garden to visit his mother and Bella had excused herself to give them some time alone together. Had it been deliberate to squeeze through the gap between the chairs so close to where Oliver was preparing to sit down?
She’d been close enough to hear the way he sucked his breath in, anyway.
And she had felt the way his gaze had followed her back to the house.
She’d felt it all the way down to her bones.
Bella had stopped just inside the French doors of the conservatory and taken a backward glance, just in time to see him turning his head towards his mother.
But she knew. Oliver was feeling the same sexual tension that she was.
He couldn’t avoid her completely because she spent so much time with his mother. He couldn’t fire her because she was employed by Lady Dorothy and, anyway, why would he fire someone who was helping his beloved mother so much?
There was something else he couldn’t do anything about either, and that was if Bella teased him with that new awareness.
Just a little. Just enough to make sure they both knew what it was they really wanted.
She might not be appropriate and Oliver might be quite right in thinking he didn’t want her in his life on a permanent basis, but he wanted her now and when she’d leave in a few months’ time, Bella had a new determination to make sure that he realised what he’d missed out on.
* * *
Getting away to Australia for a few days to attend a conference in Melbourne had been the best idea Oliver had had for some time.
Professionally, it was stimulating. Personally, it gave him the space to deal with the uncomfortable blip in his life that his encounter with Bella had caused.
That upheaval in his private life was more than two weeks ago now. Clearly his mother had no idea that anything untoward had occurred between her son and her private nurse, and life had returned to sit within its normal, albeit new, parameters.
Oliver was quite confident that he could go back to doing the best job he was capable of at St Patrick’s, ensure that his mother was as comfortable and happy as possible and keep up his social obligations when it came to the charity work that was synonymous with the Dawson family name.
That confidence was still with him when he arrived home that evening from the airport. He found his mother in her study and Oliver’s confidence went up a notch when he saw what she was doing.
The modified keyboard had been a brilliant idea of Bella’s.
The motivation to keep up with old friends and current events had seen his mother overcome the initial challenge of the movement her hands and fingers were required to make.
Thanks to Bella’s encouragement, she had persevered to the point where the contact with the outside world was so enjoyable that the exercise was proving very beneficial, and her range of movements seemed to be increasing daily.
‘Lovely to see you home, darling,’ Lady Dorothy said. ‘But I’m awfully busy getting the organisation for this new fundraiser under way. I gave Bella the night off so I could get on with it. Maybe we could have breakfast together?’
Oliver went off to unpack his back with a smile on his face.
Things were all as they should be at home.
Better, even. No doubt about it. Bella was doing an exemplary job as Lady Dorothy’s private nurse and there had been no more incidents with the diabetes control.
Oliver had kept a tight watch on things up until he’d taken the risk of going away for a few days, but everything had run just as smoothly at home while he’d been away.
Finally, he knew he could relax and trust Bella to look after his mother.
He could trust her not to say anything about what had happened that night, too, and that was a biggie.
It wasn’t that his mother would have been appalled; she was far too open-minded for that.
Quite the opposite would have happened, Oliver suspected, and he would find all sorts of cunning plans put in motion that would leave him alone with Bella.
And it had been hard enough to be in her company even when they weren’t alone.
For those first few days he’d been acutely aware of everything about her.
So aware he could have sworn he could smell her hair from the other side of a room.
He could certainly taste her kisses when he awoke alone at night after some of the most erotic dreams he’d had since his teenage years.
He’d proved he could handle it, however, and this new level of confidence made him think he was over the worst. He’d probably be able to spend time with Bella without even thinking of ripping her clothes off.
The confidence lasted until he went downstairs to his own suite. It lasted precisely a heartbeat as he walked past the open door of the gymnasium and saw Bella climbing out of the swimming pool.
Water was cascading off every inch of her gorgeous, golden-brown skin.
The tiny bikini she wore might as well have been invisible for the effect it had on Oliver’s body.
He should keep moving and remove himself from the sight as soon as possible, but his feet were refusing to comply.
His chest seemed to be having trouble following even a subconscious directive to breathe.
Reaching for a towel that was draped over the handrail at the top of the steps, Bella looked up and saw him.
‘Oh… God… sorry!’ she exclaimed. ‘I thought you were still in Melbourne.’
‘No.’ Oliver’s throat felt like sandpaper. He cleared it. ‘I’m back,’ he said.
Bella grinned. ‘So you are.’
Oliver’s reaction to the teasing about his redundant statement was an odd mix of annoyance and… delight? Who else in his life teased him the way Bella did?
She was wrapping the towel around herself. Coming towards him.
‘I’ll get out of your way,’ she said. ‘I can have a shower in my own room.’
She was so close now Oliver could feel her warmth. A steamy, damp kind of warmth that made him think of sex.
God… Bella always made him think of sex.
He had to fight to make sure his hands stayed by his sides and didn’t reach for Bella as she went past him in the doorway. It would have been so easy to touch her. Just a soft brush on her arm maybe. And she would stop and look at him and… and there would be no going back.
Oliver pulled in some oxygen to try to kick-start his brain. Move, it ordered. Now.
* * *
It was like that moment before that first kiss all over again.
There was space between their bodies, but the air was crackling with such intensity that they might as well have been skin to skin.
Bella could feel the heat melting her bones. Like an out-of-body experience, she could almost see herself slowing down. If she paused for just a moment, whatever it was in the air would ignite and she would find herself in his arms again without being aware of quite how it had happened.
Except… Oliver was moving away from her. Towards the rooms that were even more of a private sanctuary than the gymnasium. The bedroom Bella had never been invited into.
Okay, she’d had a peek in there while he was away.
Stood in the doorway of the vast bedroom that had a bay window with the same gorgeous view of the ocean that the best rooms in the rest of the house had.
The sight of the vast bed with its masculine, burgundy cover had made her pulse skip a beat and Bella had been very tempted to go and bury her face in one of the pillows to see if she could catch a hint of Oliver.
The scent of his skin, maybe, which she would recognise instantly.
Bella kept moving herself as well. Heading for her own room upstairs because dealing with moments like that in a mature and responsible fashion was part of behaving herself with the most decorum she had available.
Sticking to her plan and obeying all the new rules that came with it.
Making up for the most irresponsible lapse she’d ever had.
She’d taken that morning-after pill. She still had the pregnancy test kit that had come with it, along with the instructions to use it three weeks after taking the pill. Just in case.
It was nearly three weeks now, wasn’t it?
If Bella went and got that responsibility out of the way, it was possible she could relax a bit more.
Maybe even bend the new rules so that things might work out a little differently if another opportunity presented itself like the one that still seemed to be exerting a magnetic pull that made her want to do a U-turn and tap on Oliver’s door.
The longing was overwhelmingly powerful. Forbidden and delicious, and Bella knew she would be feeling its subtle aftershocks for hours. Probably for the rest of the night.
But a remarkably short time later, the memory of that sexually charged moment had been completely obliterated and the aftershocks Bella was experiencing were very, very different.
And definitely very unpleasant.
Horrific even.
Shortly after that, Bella slipped out of the Dawsons’ house. There was only one place she could think of being when life threw this kind of a curved ball at her. Only one person she needed to be with.
Kate.