Chapter 36 #2
Kai could still see his face and his sneer when he’d thrown half the money he’d promised for a blowjob down at Kai, telling him he still had a lot to learn. He’d been in a suit and hadn’t even bothered to take off his wedding band.
“Liam put him on the ground, and we took everything. Told him if he said anything, we’d tell everyone he was fucking around with minors.”
Kai faltered when he got to the next part. He never talked about it, ever, but it was the most important part of the story.
“A few months after that, one of Liam’s regulars asked him to come with him to Montreal for the weekend.
He couldn’t take me with him, so he said I could stay with some friends of his.
They were into the same stuff we were doing, but they were also running drugs and Liam wasn’t into it, so we didn’t stay there much.
Right after he left, Liam’s friend, Tristan, told me there was someone asking for me.
I didn’t want to do it, because Liam had always been with me before but I felt obligated, kind of, because I was staying with him and it was more money than anyone had given me before. ”
Kai started to shake, the memory stirring terror in his belly, his body already fighting off panic. “The guy came over and it seemed okay, but I didn’t know they put something in my drink.”
He saw Nolan’s hands curl into tight fists.
Kai couldn’t say out loud all the things they’d done to him for two days, keeping him half drugged so he couldn’t fight back, and the scars that they’d left on his body.
“Liam came for me and took me to the hospital. I had to stay there for a bit, and when I came out, I heard that there’d been a fire and there’d been three of them. ”
Kai looked up at Nolan, willing him to understand the next part. Nolan was like stone, staring down at him, something scary coming off of him in waves.
“Two of them died inside. The police said they’d been doing drugs and the bed they’d been sleeping in caught fire. Tristan got out, but by the time they got the fire off him, he was too far gone. Liam never said anything, but I knew…
“I didn’t want to do that stuff for a long time after, but I felt bad because Liam was still taking care of me, so we changed up. We started finding people who would buy us stuff. There’s a guy we know who sells anything we bring him for forty percent of the cut, so we started stealing a lot more.
“Then COVID happened, and shit got really bad for us. We were with Jason and Justin by then. All of the guys we hit up for work sometimes didn’t have anything.
Our landlord was gonna kick us out, and the twins’ mom too.
He’s always threatening to call Children’s Aid on her, and we were desperate, so we started doing worse shit.
” He looked at Nolan again, because he needed to see his face when he said the next part.
“If we knew someone was doing something they weren’t supposed to do, we’d get dirt and use it against them. Mostly, they were cheaters, but the last time was the worst time.” His voice fell to a whisper. “This guy didn’t want his parents to know he was gay. He begged us not to tell.”
Kai felt sick remembering the scene. His name was Max, tall and skinny, and he’d cried when he’d seen the video.
Kai had chickened out, but Liam had looked at Max like he was a science experiment.
“I told Liam I wasn’t doing that anymore and I swear, I swear, I meant it.
” Kai shook his head emphatically. “I would never have done that to you. The day I was bratting, I airdropped the video to my phone. I was just being a dick. I was going to delete it and then I forgot. I swear.”
For a long, terrible minute, Nolan was stony faced and silent. “Is that all?” he asked finally.
Is that all? Kai looked around the room, searching his memory.
He’d momentarily forgotten that he was back at his grandmother’s house.
The person that he had been here and the person he’d been for the last eight years felt like two completely different people.
When he’d lived here, he’d still had some vestiges of innocence, despite the life he’d had with his parents, but the life he’d lived after had robbed him of every last bit of it.
Now it felt like he was back at the beginning all over again.
He’d literally come full circle, but now he felt battered and bruised in his soul.
He looked at Nolan, nodding, trembling with trepidation as he met his gaze. Was this more than he’d signed up for?
Nolan’s forehead was creased, his eyes sad as they combed Kai’s face.
“What do you want to do now, Kai?” Nolan asked quietly. Kai didn’t understand. Did Nolan mean right now? His confusion must’ve shown on his face because Nolan clarified. “With your life.”
“I want to put some good on my scale,” Kai whispered, remembering Matteo’s words.
“Okay.”
“Okay?” Kai asked, bewildered. That didn’t make sense at all. Nothing that Kai had told Nolan was “okay.”
Nolan brought his hands up to cup Kai’s face, drawing him in.
“Baby, in a couple of days, we’re going to talk about getting you someone to talk to, to help you process everything you just told me but I’m telling you right now, it doesn’t change anything for me.
It’s you and me until the end. If you want to put good on your scale, let’s go do it.
Just tell me what you need, and it’s yours. ”
“How can it not change anything?” Kai asked, still unwilling to believe that Nolan could just accept all the terrible shit he’d done.
The corner of Nolan’s mouth quirked ever so slightly, his eyes going soft. “I think you know.”
Kai surged forward, crushing their mouths together. Nolan pulled him up to straddle his lap, wrapping his arms around him so that they were flush, chest to chest. Nolan held him long after the kiss was over, until Kai started to believe, maybe, he could be this lucky.