Chapter 38
Nolan had turned his alarm off the night before, knowing that he didn’t want anything to wake Kai before he absolutely needed to be awake.
Yesterday had been such an emotionally loaded day, paired with early workdays and a stressful month, so Nolan was right back to making sure Kai prioritized rest at every chance possible.
Still, waking up habitually at five-thirty every morning for over a decade meant he was never going to be able to sleep much later than that.
It was a little bit before six when he drifted into wakefulness, sunlight hitting his face from the windows.
Kai was draped half across him, his soft hair tickling his chin and his warm breath puffing against his chest.
Memories of the night before floated back to him: eating dinner in bed and then fucking and cuddling until they could barely keep their eyes open.
Kai telling him he loved him after they’d made love the first time, and then again right before he’d drifted to sleep.
Nolan’s heart expanded, a smile curving his mouth before his eyes were even open.
He opened them now, looking down at his boy, making sure he was real and that yesterday hadn’t been a dream.
Kai was very real. Nolan could tell by the lack of feeling in his right arm where Kai had slept on it all night.
As far as problems went, he would take this one every damned day for the rest of his life.
His smile expanded even as he winced, shifting positions ever so slightly to give his arm some relief and then freezing when Kai lifted his sleepy head, gazing up at him through bleary eyes.
Then he crawled right on top of him to drop his head onto the other side of his chest. Nolan stayed absolutely still until Kai’s breathing evened out again before pulling the duvet back over him.
How the hell had he gotten this lucky? He’d prayed for it every day since he’d lost Kai, but part of Nolan had lived in fear that he’d lost him for good.
Still, yesterday hadn’t been all sunshine.
Kai’s confession would haunt him forever.
Yes, he’d known that there was every likelihood that Kai had seen some shit, but hearing him say those words, knowing he’d experienced one of the worst things that could ever happen to a child, fucked with his head in ways he couldn’t imagine.
He didn’t believe that he could ever forgive Liam for what he’d done, but now?
Liam had a pass for life. He’d taken care of Kai when he was barely old enough to take care of himself, in unimaginable ways, and now, Liam was under Nolan’s protection forever.
Nolan wasn’t going to forget his promise to Kai either. In a few days, when things settled a bit more, they were going to talk about therapy, and he was going to make sure that Kai received the help he needed.
He was well and truly stuck under Kai now, and since he had no intention of moving, Nolan sighed, closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep.
“I don’t know what I should do?” Kai ’s tone was quizzical as he peered up at Nolan like he had all of the answers in the world.
They’d finally gotten out of bed a while ago, showered and had breakfast. Kai was never out of arm’s reach, and Nolan fully expected his clinginess might last a bit longer than normal.
A half-built Lego phoenix was strewn across the coffee table, and Nolan didn’t mind in the slightest. He’d missed finding a trail of Lego wherever Kai wandered.
He’d taken a break to perch on Nolan’s lap on the couch, where they had started talking about Kai’s house.
Sure, there were still some legalities to take care of, but as far as Nolan was concerned, that house was Kai’s to do whatever the hell he wanted.
“Wait. That’s not true. I do know. I just don’t know how to do it,” Kai corrected.
“Tell me what you want, and we’ll get it done.”
“I think I want the guys to move there, but I want to get rid of everything that’s in there first. Like a clean slate, you know? I just… it kind of creeps me out thinking of my aunt and uncle being in there.”
“I think that’s fair. We can have someone go in and purge everything, or we can do it ourselves.
Do you want to make sure there’s nothing of your grandmother’s that you want to keep?
” Given that Kai still had that old cellphone his grandmother had given him upstairs in his backpack, Nolan was certain that there were other mementos Kai would want to hold on to.
“Yeah. No. I want to go through it. Just in case.” Kai fell silent, and then his brow creased with concern. “What about the twins though? I can’t leave them behind. And what about Liam?”
Nolan’s heart squeezed. “Have you talked to him lately?”
“No. Not since…” Kai trailed off, colour flooding his cheeks.
“He came here a couple of weeks ago.”
Kai’s gaze jolted to Nolan’s, surprised and alarmed. “What did he want?”
“He returned the money. Well. Most of it.” The corner of Nolan’s mouth quirked up in a smile at the confusion on Kai’s face. “He didn’t actually say he was sorry, but I think he was.”
Kai scoffed, but his incredulity morphed into alarm. “Shit. Maybe he’s dying or something.”
“Actually, he said he was jealous. He accused me of stealing his family.”
Kai’s shoulders sank and he shrank into himself. “It’s my fault. I fucked it all up. I was so scared he was going to ruin this for me and he’s so stubborn all the time. I handled it all wrong.”
Nolan pulled him down so that Kai could rest his head on Nolan’s shoulder. “You did the best you could. I think I understand him a little better now though. He’s loyal, and I think he cares about you a lot. He’s still a menace though.”
Kai huffed out a soft laugh.
“You don’t have to make any decisions right now. If you don’t want him there, that’s fine but if you do, that’s also fine.”
“I do want him there. I want him to be safe so he knows he doesn’t have to do fucked-up shit to get by anymore.”
“And what about you?”
“Me?” Kai asked.
“Yeah. Where will you be?” Nolan’s heart picked up its pace as Kai pulled away to look at him, confused. He wanted to demand that Kai move in with him, but the whole point of securing his grandmother’s house for him was to give him autonomy and a sense of security.
Still, there was a difference between demanding and making his wishes known. “For the record, I told you two nights ago that when I got you back here, I was never letting you go and I meant it. I want you here with me. For the rest of our lives.”
Kai’s throat worked, his eyes growing damp. He nodded frantically, wrapping his arms around Nolan’s neck and kissing him hard.
“I love you,” Nolan whispered when he finally pulled away. The smile that broke out on Kai’s face was beatific.
“I love you more.”
So they were going to be that couple. Nolan wasn’t mad about it at all.
They went over to Kai’s house shortly after that, and this time they walked in together, hand in hand.
There was none of the trepidation that Nolan had seen on Kai when he’d watched him walk in here on his own the day before.
Even though he’d sent Myles with him, Nolan had worried about Kai’s panic attacks and he’d wanted to be nearby just in case.
He’d been grateful for that decision when he’d walked in the house and seen Kai on his knees, weighed down by grief.
Today, Kai was quiet but eager to get started.
He walked Nolan through the space, telling him what he wanted to get rid of while Nolan kept a running catalogue in his head.
They’d sell the furniture and use the money to rip out the old carpet and put in new floors, but most everything else was in good condition.
Nolan would have been happy to fund it all, but he knew Kai would want to minimize how much Nolan had to spend if he could.
They grabbed a giant box of garbage bags from under the kitchen sink and began loading up bags for donation.
The master bedroom was easy. Downstairs, they found that half of the basement had been converted into a fully equipped gym area while the other was storage, rammed from floor to ceiling with boxes and bins and things stacked on top of each other. Kai looked immediately overwhelmed.
“Come on. Let’s deal with upstairs for right now. We don’t have to rush through it all.”
Kai nodded. “I think we need help.”
“Why don’t I call Chris and you call the guys and we’ll get a little clean-up party going.” Kai nodded again, looking immediately relieved. They headed back upstairs, each of them pulling out their phones.
“Hey man,” Chris answered when he picked up.
“What are you guys doing today?” Nolan asked in case they had plans.
“Not much. What’s up?”
“I’ll supply the food if you and the guys can supply some heavy lifting for a bit.”
Chris chuckled. “You at Kai’s?”
Nolan felt a flare of vindictive pride hearing Chris refer to this place as Kai’s. “Yeah. Just trying to get it cleared out.”
“Shoot me the address and we’ll come through.”
“Great. Texting you now.” But his attention was caught on the frown on Kai’s face. He’d already hung up with Chris when he caught the tail end of Kai’s conversation.
“Alright. Just stay there until we get there.”
“What’s going on?”
“Dom’s on some shit, and the twins are freaking out. Every time he gets like this, something bad happens. Can we go?” Kai said, worry etched into every line of his face.
“Yeah, come on, let’s lock up and get going.”
They hurried out the house, leaving everything the way it was, and jumped in the car. Kai looked tense the whole time, and when Nolan reached over to take his hand, he gripped it tight.
“It’s alright, baby. We’ll deal with whatever’s going on together, okay?”
Kai nodded, but Nolan could feel his nerves fraying as they maneuvered through thirty minutes of bumper-to-bumper Toronto traffic.
Nolan’s stomach sank as they neared the park, and bright red and blue lights raised the alarm.
The scene was crowded with people from neighbouring trailers, but Nolan spotted Jason, Justin and the kids immediately.
Kai cursed at the sight of two police cruisers and an ambulance parked out front of the trailers and was out of the car as soon as Nolan slid it into park.
“Kai!” One of the boys, who’d been hiding behind Jason, spotted Kai first, running over to him and throwing his arms around his waist. Kai hugged him back, and he was probably the only reason Kai didn’t launch himself at the man pinned on the ground beneath two officers.
Nolan recognized the look of rage on his face.
The man on the ground was cussing up a storm, trying to throw the officers off as they struggled to get him into cuffs.
“What the fuck did you do, you piece of shit?” Kai hollered at him. Nolan tugged him over to where Jason and Justin stood, Justin with his arms around the other boy.
“What happened?” Nolan asked Jason, taking in the laceration across his cheek and his busted lip.
Jason gritted his teeth. “He was on her ass all day, and I was going over there to tell her to come stay with us when he lost his shit.” Jason looked down at the boys and then to Nolan, shaking his head again.
“Don’t worry, you little shits. Daddy will be home in no time,” Dom sneered at the twins, lunging at them, even as the cops tried to haul him away.
Nolan stepped in front of the little group, locking eyes with Dom as the cops dragged him over to the cruiser and manhandled him into the back.
They were distracted by the door to the trailer opening, another officer leading a paramedic at the bottom end of a stretcher.
Nolan felt a surge of rage, his stomach clenching against the sudden blow of seeing Riley emerge on the stretcher.
Her face was raw and swollen, the skin broken on her lips and cheeks and brow.
Her left eye was swollen completely closed, and blood matted her hair on the left side of her head.
“Mom!” Casey and Callum screamed simultaneously, rushing to her side, both of them immediately bursting into tears as they tried to hug onto her. It was only then that Nolan noted the sling around her right arm as she tried to comfort them. Justin, Jason and Kai all rushed forward.
“Where are you taking her?” Jason asked the paramedic.
“St. Mike’s. Are you sure you don’t want us to take a look at that?” She nodded to his face. He shook his head.
“No. It’s good. We’ll meet you there.”
“You guys stay with Jason and Justin. I’ll be right back,” Riley said, her voice hoarse as she kissed each boy.
The twins allowed Kai and Justin to pull them away, even as tears streamed down their faces as they watched her get loaded into the back of the ambulance.
Nolan had never felt so helpless in his life.
“Come on, let’s go. I’ll take you guys down there.”
“Are you sure, man?” Jason asked.
“Yeah, of course. Does anyone have a key to lock up her place?”
Jason nodded and disappeared into the trailer.
“Hey, come help me,” Nolan said to Kai. Kai relinquished the twin he was holding to Justin and followed Nolan over to the car. Together, they pulled up the last row of seats in the SUV to make room for all of them.
“Are you okay?” Nolan asked quietly. Kai shook his head. Nolan pulled Kai into him, and he sagged against him.
“He’s going to fucking kill her one day,” Kai muttered into him, frustration and grief weighing on every word.
“Is it always like this?”
“No, this is really bad even for him.” Officers were still talking to some of the neighbours, but others were trickling away. Nolan tightened his arms around Kai, relieved that Kai was escaping this grim place.
“Okay. Let’s get to the hospital and see what the doctors are saying, and then figure out where we’re going to go from there.”
“Okay. Maybe this is the answer though.” Kai looked up at him hopefully. “Maybe she’ll finally leave him and come with us.”
“Maybe. Talk to her before you say anything in front of the twins. Why don’t you tell everyone to pack some gear and come stay with us tonight? We’re closer to the hospital, and they can probably do with a bit of a break hmm?”
Kai’s leaned up to press a kiss to Nolan’s mouth. “Thank you, Daddy.”
“Go on now.” Nolan pressed one more kiss to his mouth and then turned him back towards the trailer. Fifteen minutes later, they were all piled in, subdued but on their way.