Chapter 14
Bianca
Regret.
I once regretted drinking too much on my twenty-first birthday. My girlfriends had taken me downtown, and we had the VIP section of a nightclub. Champagne flowed all night, and I ended up losing my virginity to a stranger. I wanted to give it away so Gino couldn’t have it. At the time it was fun, but the next morning I could barely open my eyes. Every sound hurt my head, and I promised myself I would never do anything so stupid ever again.
Regret has a funny way of creeping up on you. At the time, you love what you’re doing, and never want to stop.
Like now. A huge part of me doesn’t want Costi to stop touching me. I’ve fantasized about this for so many years. I’ve imagined his hands on me. Rough. Needy. I’ve pictured it countless times throughout my past. This is so much better than any dream I’ve ever had.
One thing I never imagined, however, was the next morning. Will I regret it?
I don’t know.
I slide off his lap. “We should slow down.” It’s astonishing I just uttered those words.
He stands, repositioning himself in his pants. “I’m sorry. I got carried away.”
I turn, not really sure what to do. “Well, we should head back.” The sun is disappearing rather quickly, and I hustle down the path we came, my nerves threatening to expose themselves the longer I’m around him. I don’t want him to know I’m nervous.
But I am.
Every moment that passes, my palms get sweatier. There’s a rollercoaster in my stomach. I’m not even sure why. I just know there’s something monumental forming between us right now, and I don’t know if I can fight it much longer.
We make it down the mountain in record time, and once inside Costi’s house, I nearly sprint to the back bedroom, shutting the door to be alone with my thoughts.
“Slow down, right? I can slow things down.” I think back to the hike and the way Costi’s eyes held a certain possessiveness.
“No, this is silly,” I whisper to myself. “He probably has millions of women banging his door down.”
“Bianca,” Costi yells through the door, rattling the wood, shocking me that here he is, trying to bang down my door. “Can I come in, please?”
I swing it open, and he gazes at me the same way he did when we were out on the hike. With longing. With desire. Passion.
Raw fucking need.
“We need to talk,” he growls out.
I open the door further, allowing him into my room. “Ok, sure.”
He stalks toward me until his body presses against mine. “I’ve thought about you for a long time, Bianca. Since the moment I left Miami. I’ve thought about everything .” He sweeps his thumb along my jawline. “I don’t know if I can go slow. I feel like I’ve been going slowly with you for years.”
He brushes a stray strand of hair behind my ear, and a cascade of chills erupt down my spine. “I’ve thought about you too,” I whisper.
His eyes widen and I can only describe his lopsided grin as wicked. “You’ve thought about me?”
“I just said I did.”
“Did you think about me late at night? Touching yourself? Making yourself come?”
I swallow. I don’t know how to answer him. My heartbeat pounds in my ears. I want to scream yes to him, but his half-smile says he knows I have without me saying a word.
“Have you, Bianca?” His voice is decadent, like creamy chocolate, as his dark eyes roam over my body.
“Maybe.”
“I’ve jerked off thinking about you for so many years.” He sits on the edge of the bed, guiding me to straddle his lap. “We’re gonna take this nice and slow.”
The idea of him jerking off to thoughts of me turns me on. Makes me yearn to see it again.
I nod as his hardness grows beneath me. “Ok.”
“You’ll be in complete control.”
I like the sound of that. The look in Costi’s eyes has me rocking my body against the enormous ridge in his jeans.
“Slow,” he breathes out, like he can’t handle much more of this.
He leans in and captures my lips. His eager tongue traces along mine as I grab at his shoulders, rocking into him one more time.
He grips my hips, stopping my movement. The need for me to move intensifies.
“I thought I was in charge.”
Costi releases his hold on my hips. “Show me how you’d move on my cock.”
My eyes widen, and I do as he says, slowly moving in tempo with the beats of our hearts.
“That’s right. Show me.” His voice is raspy, deep and low, like he’s barely hanging on by a thread.
I grip his shoulders, moving, so turned on.
“How does it feel?”
Incredible. My body climbs toward a peak it can’t quite reach, but needs to so badly. I continue to rock, moving my aching center over his hardness until I’m grinding against him.
When I lean my head back in pleasure, Costi lathers kisses up and down my neck, turning me on even more.
“I need it,” I whine.
My raw passion is at an explosion level when Costi murmurs against the shell of my ear, “Come for me, Bianca. I want to watch you light up.”
Within mere seconds, I’m coming. It’s exquisite. And let the record show, I’ve never felt anything this extreme in my life. The beating of my heart reverberates in my ears, and my insides explode into a billion tiny pieces. It feels like every single nerve ending is bubbling with excitement. My chest expands with ragged breaths, trying its hardest to contain my thumping heart and calm my vibrating body.
Once my body returns to normal, I attempt to move off Costi’s lap, but he doesn’t release his hold on my hips.
“Bianca, that was the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen,” he says, his eyes glazed over, before kissing me.
His arms wrap tighter around me, making me feel loved and safe.
But I’m not loved and safe with him.
“That was a mistake,” I say, instantly regretting everything we just did. I stand, fixing my clothing and hair.
Costi rises, adjusting the large ridge in his jeans. “Don’t say that.” He reaches for me, but I recoil from his touch. Costi rakes his teeth over his bottom lip, and the dejected look on his face pains me. I instantly feel an ache in my chest from hurting him.
He recovers quickly, shuttering the vulnerability. “I’m going to feed you, and then I’m going to show you how this wasn’t a mistake at all.”
I blink, not really sure if I can resist this chemistry much longer.
My body has yearned for him since I saw him at the party. I hate to admit it, but it’s true.
We make our way to the kitchen, where Costi prepares us prosciutto sandwiches.
“Do you have a plan?” I bite into the crusty roll full of my favorite ham.
Costi’s eyebrow raises as his eyes rake over me. “Oh, I’ve got plans for you and me.”
“I meant about Bishop. You’re not really going to hand me over to him, are you?”
Costi sets his sandwich down, leaning against the counter. “Bishop will never lay one finger on you.”
I breathe a sigh of relief. “Promise?”
He traces a gentle path down my cheek with his forefinger. “You need to trust me, Bianca. I won’t let anyone hurt you.”
“Promise?”
“Promise, B.”
I forget food as he lifts me into his arms and carries me away from the kitchen, down the hallway to the master suite.
He kicks open his door with such power and force it nearly breaks from its hinges. He sets me on the bed, his breathing ragged. “I need to be deep inside you.”
His eyes lock with mine, and I can’t look away. Gorgeous. It makes my insides sizzle with heat, and I squirm on the soft comforter.
It’s enough for Costi to take notice.
“Am I turning you on?”
I squirm again, trying desperately to get some relief. “Yes.”
He steps closer, dominating, removing his t-shirt. “And I haven’t even touched you yet.”
I study the grooves of his abs and lick my lips, wanting to run my tongue along the carved ridges.
“You’re a needy little thing, aren’t you? I bet you're so wet for me.” His voice is doing things to me. Making me feel naughty. Alive. On fire. Completely and utterly turned on.
Feeling brave, I lie back and reach for him, wanting him on the bed with me. No, needing him on the bed with me. “Why don’t you come and find out.”
He grabs my ankle, tugging me further down the bed. “Careful, B. Don’t ask for something unless you’re ready for me to do it.” He removes my socks and shoes, tossing them onto the floor. “Are you ready for this?”
I don’t know.
Am I?