Chapter 29 James
James
James was going to kill him. He was going to fucking kill that one-balled prick and he was going to make it hurt.
“Plotting ways to escape?” Carlo tipped the bottle, swallowing the last few mouthfuls.
“That is my favorite thing about you, James. Everything has gone so utterly wrong for you, every aspect of your life has been torn apart, and yet you refuse to concede. You can be killed but never, ever broken.” He gestured to Ahnna with the wine bottle. “Unlike this one.”
Moving around the fire, Carlo knelt next to her still form, and James tensed.
The Beast leaned over Ahnna so that his cheek hovered just above hers, then closed his eyes.
“I can feel the will to fight fading from her. She knows that everything she does makes Ithicana’s situation worse, and I think that I’ll have to take measures to keep her alive to deliver her to Mother.
Do you think it’s possible to die from a broken heart?
Because Ahnna’s heart has most surely been broken.
” Carlo snickered. “I did not factor you as a breaker of women’s hearts, dear nemesis.
What other things will I learn about you on this journey? ”
James didn’t answer, only watched as Carlo sighed and moved back to sit on his rock.
“If it makes you feel any better, Mother kept all these secrets from me as well,” he said, then picked up a stick to poke the fire.
“All these long years, Alexandra has been Mother’s darling protégée—and not once did I suspect, not even when they schemed together with Silas Veliant.
Do you think Silas knew about Alexandra?
I suspect not. Information is power, and secrets are the greatest information of all. ”
“I’ve no interest in your mutterings.” James lay down, curling around the spike that bound him to the ground.
His whole body ached to the point it was hard to tell the difference between the pain of injuries and the pain of muscles pushed far past what they could endure, and the cold seeping up from the frozen earth made it all the worse.
Then warmth pressed against his back.
Revulsion pooled in James’s gut, because Carlo had sat next to him. Was using him as a fucking backrest.
“How quickly the tides change,” the Beast murmured, leaning an elbow on James’s ribs.
“You pursued Ahnna with the righteousness of justice and the fires of hate fueling your every step, but now you stew in the sourness of guilt wrought by the clarity of truth. How does it feel to have wrongly condemned your lady love, my friend? How does it feel to have hurt her because you allowed yourself to be a pawn in Alexandra’s game? ”
“The worst of what I’ve done, I did of my own volition,” James replied. “I don’t deserve the absolution of being deemed a pawn. Now fuck off, Carlo. I’m tired.”
“What does it say about you that you are not brought low by such truths?” Carlo’s voice was dreamy. “It is as though the darkness that resides in your heart drinks misery as if it were the finest wine.”
“Spare me your bad poetry.”
“My words are a song to which all others dance.” Carlo sang the words in falsetto. “Dance until their minds or their bodies break.”
There was no sense arguing with him. If James was to be awake, he was better off using the time to plan how he and Ahnna might escape.
Tuning out Carlo’s humming, James tested the length of rope between his wrists and the stake that had been hammered into the ground, which was sadly insufficient to get around the Beast’s neck.
It wouldn’t just be a matter of getting free of the ropes and making a run for it.
Without weapons or supplies, there was every chance they’d escape Carlo, only to freeze to death or be eaten by the Blackreach lions.
They needed to secure a few necessary items in their flight, and James set his mind to determining what they would need and what they could survive without.
You won’t need much given that Ahnna will stab you in the heart the first chance she gets.
The thought reared, sending his mental lists spinning into the ether, and James grimaced.
Your father plotted to overthrow her brother, his conscience whispered. He aimed to make you king of Ithicana—which you sat back and did nothing about. And then there is Taryn—can’t blame anyone but yourself for that.
James grimaced as Carlo’s humming increased in volume, hating the warm press of the other man’s back against his.
He needed a bow. Arrows. A knife. Some rope.
You destroyed her life while making her believe you were her friend. While trying to make her your lover.
James twisted his face into the rough wool blanket, and Carlo patted him soothingly, humming a lullaby.
Don’t worry about food. Leave the horses—you’ll never get them over the avalanche debris.
Convincing Ahnna to leave Dippy might take some doing, but hopefully the chance to escape Carlo would be enough motivation.
So your plan is to take her back to Harendell? So that William can execute her? Because no one is going to believe this story. They’ll think you’re trying to protect your lover.
James grimaced, every muscle in his body as tense as a board.
Maybe it was better to steal back the horses. They could escape into Amarid, then ride north through the Lowlands and over the border to Cardiff.
To Cardiff. Right into the arms of your family, who has already tried to murder Ahnna once. Besides, she wants to go to Ithicana.
The food in his stomach churned, because would Ithicana be any better?
Would Aren protect his sister if it meant war?
Could Aren protect her given the force of arms that William would bring to bear once the calm season arrived?
The only real option was for Ahnna to flee south, beyond Valcotta, to the southern nations that cared little for northern politics.
Except she’ll never agree to run.
James’s hands balled into fists, the ropes digging painfully into his skin as the tendons in his wrists flexed.
“Easy, easy.” Carlo patted James again, and his temper snapped.
He slammed his elbow into the Beast’s kidney, then twisted and caught hold of his coat. James shoved Carlo to the ground and tried to reach for his throat, but the ropes binding his wrists snapped taut.
Cursing, James caught hold of Carlo’s clothes again and pulled him closer to the stake, trying to knee him in the side, but his ankles were tethered to the same stake. So instead he elbowed him in the gut, the attack frenzied. Hopeless, because soldiers were running toward them.
And Carlo was laughing.
As the Amaridians pinned James down, the Beast slowly got to his feet, a wild grin on his face though he had to be in pain. “Easy, friends, easy. It is good to see that the bastard of Harendell still holds on to his spirit. Let him sleep so that we might have more games tomorrow.”
He strode away and disappeared into a tent.
Not caring if it was a waste of energy, James fought against the soldiers trying to pin him down. “How can you follow him?” he snarled. “He’s fucking insane. A sadist. You should do the world a favor and put him down.”
“A mad dog he might be, but he’s our mad dog,” one of the Amaridians answered, then slammed his fist into James’s stomach. “I’ve lost comrades to your blade, bastard. You’ll find no friends among us.”
They held him down while one of the soldiers hammered the stake even deeper into the frozen ground, then they threw a blanket over James.
Aching and exhausted and furious beyond measure, James stared through the flickering fire and found Ahnna staring back at him.
Her face was expressionless, but her eyes held dull resentment that James knew was for him and him alone. He waited for her angry words, for her hatred, for her threats, but instead Ahnna turned her back on him.
Which was so much worse.
Merciless dawn came early, along with a cheerful Carlo who sang an aria to the rising sun while pissing on a campfire.
Not an inch of James didn’t hurt, but he did his best to ignore the pain while he ate and drank what was given to him, all his focus on Ahnna.
She was pale and dead-eyed, listless as she picked at her food, and she refused to meet his gaze. Carlo had stolen the spirit out of her with his words; the sadist was a master at knowing exactly what would hurt the most.
Nothing mattered to Ahnna more than her people’s welfare. Knowing her efforts to aid them had been used to damn them was bad enough, but being powerless to do anything about it was torture.
“Are we ready to start our day?” Carlo asked as he approached. He held out a gloved hand to Ahnna. “I do so love a ride in the snow. Especially with a beautiful woman.”
Ahnna didn’t look at him, only stared blankly at the ground. Making a noise of exasperation, Carlo reached down and closed his fingers around her broken arm. A sob of pain tore from Ahnna as he hauled her to her feet, the sound of it nearly throwing James’s tenuous control over the edge.
“Enjoy your exertions today, James,” Carlo called over his shoulder as he pulled Ahnna toward the waiting Dippy. Then he skipped and kicked up a cloud of snow. “It’s getting so deep! How fun!”
“He doesn’t understand the meaning of that word,” one of the soldiers restraining James muttered when Carlo was out of earshot. “He’s going to accidentally kill you and then she’s going to have the rest of us flayed for allowing it to happen.”
James didn’t recognize him from the night prior, so he asked, “Why do you put up with him? Tear out his throat and say it was the lions.”
The grizzled Amaridian soldier huffed out a breath.
“Katarina would only flay us for not keeping him safe. Of all her jewels, Carlo shines the brightest in her eyes.” His eyes flicked up to meet James’s.
“I’d think you’d be familiar with such a dynamic given the way Alexandra dotes on your simpering whelp of a little brother.
All of us hate your bastard self, but none of us would deny you’re the better man. Must be the Cardiffian in you.”