Chapter 28
ELIZA
It was almost five by the time Eliza left the bungalow, having given it a much-needed clean, dust and hoover.
She’d thrown away some food she’d forgotten about in the fridge, and grabbed a tin of soup for lunch with half a frozen garlic baguette.
Needs must. It was a good thing she had her work bag in the car as her shift began in an hour.
She’d drive straight there. After saying goodbye to the builder – Tom, as she now called him – Eliza drove off, arriving with just enough time to change.
It wasn’t often that she rued her age – back in the day she’d never believed she’d live so long, not with Howard – but she missed being able to hurry at full pelt, such as run into The Niterie and change into her uniform, then pop to the loo before grabbing a glass of water in the staff room.
Everything like that took longer and routines had crept in over the years, like folding clothes neatly and washing a glass up immediately after using it.
It was bang on six when she reached reception, a little out of breath and perspiring.
Jules opened the doors and high-fived Eliza as she came back inside and walked past, their habit now.
Carrie’s job gave Eliza’s day a new structure – dinner late at nine in the evening, home in the early hours for a hot chocolate before bed, when the rest of the street was asleep, and she now got up at nine in the morning.
At first her digestive system complained, but had since got used to it.
What with working on and off at the florist’s, she was sleeping more soundly than she had in years.
Eliza smiled at the first customers, Bob and Jim, straight in from the office.
They worked in insurance and played golf on the weekends.
When it was quieter, she liked to get to know the regulars.
As her shift heated up, Eliza recalled the quiet evenings she’d have at the bungalow, when she wasn’t seeing friends.
Now she was up and about and meeting different people, and she felt that physical sparkle that used to make her feet spring to life at ballet and tap classes; that sparkle that, weirdly, lit her up every time Jez laughed.
Jules came to give her a break at nine and she headed into the staff room, past security who were removing one young man.
A group of women stumbled past, towards the chillout room, one of them carrying a fishbowl cocktail and spilling it.
Another was crying and had panda eyes from smudged eyeliner.
Eliza hesitated and then stopped in front of her.
‘Hope I’m not speaking out of turn, but is everything all right?’ she asked in a kind tone.
The group of them stopped.
‘Her ex-fiancé is here with his new girlfriend,’ a woman with a silver bandage dress on said, slurring a little. ‘It’s the cow he left her for and had been seeing secretly for months.’
‘All right,’ hissed the woman who was crying, and she glared at her friend who mouthed sorry and put an arm around her. She gave Eliza a sheepish look. ‘It’s bad enough that I got cheated on, without the whole world knowing as well.’
‘Lucky you found out sooner rather than later what a fool he is,’ said Eliza, and passed her a tissue. ‘I got stuck in an unhappy marriage for years. Trust me, if a man’s an idiot, it’s best to find out before life gets more complicated.’
What was happening? Eliza had never even met these people before. But being more open about her past… wow, how liberating.
Eliza’s face softened. ‘But I’m sorry, love, you must feel so very hurt, and with good reason too.’ She went up to the bar and spoke to the bartender. Minutes later she entered the chillout room and went over to the group of friends. She handed the jilted woman a packet of crisps.
‘Cheese and onion flavour. Always hits the spot. Now don’t you let the buggers get you down! You’ve picked yourself up and are out and about and with good friends, by the looks of it. That’s amazing. You go, girl!’
A tear-stained face morphed into a smile and the woman lifted her chin a little.
Having lost ten minutes of her break, Eliza hurried away into the staff room.
Jez was in there sipping a black coffee, a small gold cross earring hanging from one of his ears.
He now had his break at the same time as her.
‘There you are!’ he said. ‘Not manhandling any troublemakers, were you, and giving them a K-pop kick to get out?’ Jez grinned.
‘No. I save those steps for later on.’ Since she’d started, Jez had made her favourite song, ‘Dynamite’, the last play of the night, instead of the usual ‘Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go’ by Wham!
Couldn’t be anything to do with her. Had to be a coincidence.
Nevertheless, it gave her a cosy feeling that would last until she got home and into bed.
She’d shake her moves, as the youngsters would say, and Jez would clear nearby tables, giving her the thumbs-up, whilst Jules and other staff joined in.
His eyes would twinkle at her across the room, brighter than the starlight in the dance floor, a twinkle that meant so much after her years of lack of trust when it came to men.
And before taking on this job, Eliza had kept busy but had never known she had quite so much energy.
But then Jules had encouraged her to buy a juicer and sometimes brought her in a quinoa salad.
If people decades younger paid more attention to their health, certainly Eliza should pull out the stops.
She sat down in front of Jez with a green smoothie and vegetable stew she’d heated up in the microwave.
Jules had given her the recipe. Jez pulled a face.
‘Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it,’ she said and passed him the bottle, their fingers grazing, Eliza very aware of his proximity, in a good way, wishing that perhaps he would come even nearer.
Their friendship must have stepped up a level if she was happy for him to share a straw.
He swilled the liquid around in his mouth and swallowed.
‘Actually, not so bad,’ he said. ‘What’s in it?’
‘Spinach, kale and seaweed, for starters – various fruits and a big chunk of ginger.’
‘The ginger saves it.’ He flexed his arm. ‘So do I already look like Popeye?’
‘Um…’
They both laughed.
‘Good for you, though,’ he said and patted his belly. ‘I should cut down on the bar snacks.’
This was nice. Howard always laughed, but not in a nice way, when Eliza tried anything new.
Like when she’d crimped her hair in the eighties, he’d sneered that it wasn’t a classy enough hairstyle for his Queenie and what was she thinking?
As for her seventies flares, or the time she’d taken up crocheting which was written off as a hobby for old ladies…
Shortly before he’d died, she’d taken up jogging.
He lost his temper when she came back from a run wearing tight leggings and accused her of wanting to attract the attention of other men.
Whereas Jez was prepared to join in with her new interest and, despite his cynicism, offered encouragement.
‘Have you heard from Carrie?’ he asked. ‘I read online that it’s set to be forty degrees in Greece this week.’
She put down her drink. ‘That reminds me, yes! I got an email from her this morning but haven’t had time to open it.
’ She went to her locker and pulled out her phone, sat down again opposite Jez and tapped into the email.
Oh, what lovely photos of… of a place called Parikia, the capital, apparently.
The pastries in one photo looked delicious.
Eliza settled in her seat and started reading…
So, Carrie was feeding stray cats in Paros.
Perhaps Boo would like lumps of cheese… She wanted the dirt on Jez!
Ha! Eliza blushed but there was no dirt, definitely not; their relationship was as clean as her detoxifying smoothie…
Eliza read on. Oh. That meant a lot, Carrie said she was talking to Eliza like she used to talk to her mum and…
her eyes skipped to the end where she saw the word ‘connection’.
Oh. Her eyes pricked. Carrie felt a bond between the two of them.
She backtracked to read the lines she’d missed.
Eliza’s eyes focused and she swallowed, all warm, cosy feelings extinguished, due to Carrie talking about her grandparents, and how they’d let Mel down, about Mel at the end and…
her daughter forgiving Eliza? And… Carrie’s grandmother having not been there when it mattered.
Seeing the words on the screen felt hard and cold, like Carrie apparently assumed her grandmother to be.
She froze and re-read the words again. Her breath caught until, without warning, her face crumpled and a wave of emotion built in her chest until it ripped out.
Under Jez’s horrified gaze, Eliza covered her face with her hands, racked by great big shuddering sobs.
Jez didn’t speak; didn’t move either. He let her sob for several minutes, then he got up and moved into a chair by her side. He gently pulled her towards his chest and held her tightly.
‘That’s right, let it out,’ he said softly. ‘You’ll feel better.’
‘I feel like shit, as certain worse-for-wear customers say at the end of the night,’ she said in a muffled voice and leant back, managing a smile, despite her eyes being full of tears and blurry.
‘Here if you want to talk. Here if not,’ he replied.
She picked up the napkin she’d packed with her dinner and noisily blew her nose. ‘I’d better get back.’
‘No way,’ he said. ‘Jules will be fine for a little while longer.’ He took her hand and squeezed it, oh so gently. The tenderness of his touch almost made her cry again.
‘I’m okay,’ she said. ‘It was the shock.’
‘I don’t know what Carrie’s said but she’s one of the good ones, and wouldn’t want to hurt you, I’d bet my life on that.’
‘The email… she had every right but… it’s complicated.
’ Eliza dabbed her eyes. She shook herself and took her hand back, even though it had felt so nice.
It had been a long time since she’d held hands with anyone.
Oh, Howard had often taken hers, when they were out, but the act was more like a symbol of possession and, in the end, it meant nothing to Eliza; in fact, she grew to hate it – whereas Jez had held her fingers oh so gently, rubbing his thumb over her palm, as if he wished he could erase her pain.
Noisily, Eliza finished her drink.
‘Eat up that equally disgusting-looking stew, madam,’ said Jez. He sat opposite her and folded his arms.
Another tear trickled down her cheek but…
a happy one, and totally unexpected. No one had ever cared for adult Eliza like that, in terms of making sure she ate.
If she fell ill, Howard had always moaned and asked how he was supposed to make his own dinner.
Her secret girlfriends had cared but never saw how bad things were behind closed doors.
And after leaving him, after becoming independent, it had become her mission never to depend on anyone.
Jez, the way he behaved with her… this was new.
Did she dare imagine…?
‘Are you free on Sunday before your shift here?’ he asked.
Eliza nodded.
‘How about meeting for a walk in Bramhall Park? That’s near your florist shop, right? Never been before but I hear it’s beautiful and got a decent café.’
Her heart pounded in a happy way. This was sounding very much like a date. With an urge to skip, carefree and happy, she mulled over what to wear. Would they get on? A sense of excitement built inside her, unfamiliar and rather wonderful.
She leant forwards. ‘I’d love that. Thank you, Jez.’
He gave a thumbs-up. ‘Great, because I’d like you to meet a very special lady who might be able to help you. I finally met someone who understands me. We’ve been together for almost a year now. Darling Pepsi has changed my life.’