Chapter 41
ELIZA
Eliza and Jez sat on some chairs left outside a little café called Boosalis, waiting for a taxi to take them to their hotel.
Jez’s arm was around her shoulder, and Eliza’s face felt tight from crying.
Despite his warmth and the humidity of the night, a coldness had taken hold in her heart.
A bar opposite was emptying out, customers laughing and heading home, arm in arm. An owl hooted in the distance.
‘There’s a flight back at ten tomorrow morning. The change fees aren’t too bad.’ She looked up from her phone. ‘Are you sure you don’t mind heading back so quickly? I’m really sorry, Jez, but I can’t stay now. And it wouldn’t be fair on Carrie if we bumped into each other.’
He held up his hand. ‘Beautiful as it is here, I didn’t come over for the sun and souvlaki. We were never staying longer than a few days. I only came here to support you, Eliza Woods.’
‘Perhaps I don’t deserve that,’ she said in a small voice.
He frowned, took her phone and put it on the table.
‘Okay, so it didn’t work out, but you’ve done your best. I wish you two could have patched things up but I get that it’s a big ask for her…
and it’s been a big thing for you, to put yourself out there.
’ He slid his hands into hers. ‘Please, be kinder to yourself, Eliza. You deserve everything.’
‘Except the sight of you in your Tropicana Beach swimming shorts,’ she muttered.
‘That’s more like it,’ he whispered back.
‘Never forget, you are dynamite, like your favourite song.’ Jez took his hands out of hers.
‘Several years ago I hired a great guy. John retired last year. He’d been an alcoholic for over twenty years and got sober just before I interviewed him – I didn’t know at the time.
Quickly we became friends. We had things in common – a love of music, a nostalgia for our youth, and a complete denial about bar snacks raising cholesterol levels. ’
Eliza gave a flicker of a smile. ‘He had a drink problem but went for a job in a nightclub?’
‘John said it wasn’t alcohol that was the problem – it was the reasons he drank, and he was working on those.
Seeing the state of some customers was actually a reminder to him why he gave up.
Anyway, yeah, we hit it off. We both worked hard, he was as punctual as a Rolex, and sometimes he’d stay behind after his shift for a tonic water on the house.
That first year at The Niterie, he did the twelve steps recovery programme.
It was really interesting, the process he had to follow – admitting his flaws, making amends to the people he’d hurt.
Some family members refused to listen and cut him out of their lives permanently.
He was upset, but his recovery group helped him realise he’d done everything he could, and that it was time to forgive himself. It’s about acceptance.’
‘I guess so.’
‘I know so. If John hadn’t accepted those family members’ decision to cut ties, he’d probably be an alcoholic again now, tying himself in knots.
Instead he’s leading a productive life. Last I heard he was volunteering at an addiction centre.
’ Jez took a bottle of water out of his rucksack and took a swig.
‘My dad taught me a lot about acceptance, too. He was a local councillor. He showed me that it’s okay if everyone doesn’t like you.
He demonstrated that sometimes you have to accept that things are out of your control and make the best of it.
He was a pioneer in terms of green initiatives, and back in those days the problems were similar to those of today, energy-reducing plans having to compete with the needs of urban development.
Most of the time things didn’t go his way and he had to work through the disappointments and challenges.
I learnt that “failure” often means changing course and aiming to achieve something in a different way.
’ He gave her a sheepish look. ‘Sorry, went off at a tangent there.’
‘No, you’re right, Jez, and it’s good that someone reminded me. It’s like Covid and lockdowns and having to get on with it. Looking back, it’s hard to understand how we managed, but we did…’
‘You’ll get through this, you will,’ he said gently.
Eliza booked the tickets and the taxi arrived. Once in the back she took out her phone and went into the group chat.
Hello Ariana and Rae,
I’ve told Carrie who I am. She could probably use some support if you two are able. I hope the three of you work things out.
Take care. Never compromise your principles or happiness for someone else, like I did. They won’t ever be worth it.
Eliza x
She pressed send, took a deep breath and went into the email app.
Dear Carrie,
Sorry for the unexpected visit today. I don’t blame you for the anger. I’ll never know exactly what you and Mel went through. Even a bouquet as big as the moon – of apology flowers, like white tulips and pink carnations – could never heal the hurt, I know.
I loved Mel so very much. She screamed louder than any other baby in the hospital ward, after she was born.
Her being vocal never stopped – standing up for school friends, answering Howard back…
It doesn’t surprise me that she brought up a daughter as wonderful as you, who’s faced adversity and embraced a new life like her mother did.
I would say I’m incredibly proud of you both, but I’ve not earned the right.
It’s been a privilege to get to know you, Carrie, over the last few weeks. I will always treasure this time.
I won’t contact you again – except to sort out what happens with Boo. It’s time I moved back to my bungalow. I will, of course, pay the rent on your old place until the current lease ends.
Take care. Never forget how strong you are.
When your mum hit the teen years and saw Howard for who he was, she’d glare at me if I put up with his nonsense.
In recent years, when I’ve faced challenges, such as Covid hitting the business or my health failing, I’ve pictured that glare and pulled myself together.
Perhaps you know which glare I’m talking about.
Remember the most important thing – whatever life throws at you, YOU DO YOU.
Love from
Eliza x
Eliza squeezed her eyes tight. No more tears. She pressed send, wishing she could stop crying inside.