Chapter 31 Wren
WREN
If I slam my phone down on the kitchen counter of the ranch house, it’s by design. Because if I don’t take it out on my phone and a lump of marble, I might hit someone or say words I can’t take back.
I hate the idea that action is happening without me, even though I understand why I’m here. Jackal and Shade offered to stay behind to add an extra layer of protection to the prospects cruising outside of the house.
“They don’t mean any offense by it,” Shade says, stepping behind me to put coffee in the filter before setting it to drip. The man is built like a tank. Short hair, wide shoulders, thick calves.
Jackal steps around the other side of the kitchen island. I can’t explain it, but I get tanned-vampire vibes from him. Maybe it’s the long dark hair and the slight widow’s peak. “It’s human nature to want to protect someone you love.”
Shade huffs. “So why don’t you listen to me more often when I’m trying to keep you safe?”
A wide grin breaks out on Jackal’s face. “Because who’s going to look after you if I’m not there?”
It takes me a second to realize what they are saying, confirming what I thought I knew.
“I wondered if the two of you were…”
“Going soft in our old age?” Jackal says, openly looking over at Shade in a way he usually tries to hide.
The corner of Shade’s mouth tips like it might just break into a smile, but it doesn’t. “I’d say we’re relying on the code that you won’t out us.”
“God, no.”
Shade moves next to Jackal on the other side of the counter. “Anything happens while you are here, anything at all, you can count on the two of us. A ride, a place to stay while you regroup. Our home is a safe space for you.”
“Thank you.” I reach across the counter and grab a hand each. Jackal’s fingers are soft around mine. “The rest of the club doesn’t know?”
“No,” Shade says. “Over time, people begin to suspect. Then, we usually move on.”
“This is the first club we agreed to stay with and take a permanent patch with,” Jackal says. “When we arrived in Colorado, it felt like home. For the first time, we both felt it was the place to try and put down roots.”
I glance out over the snowy fields beyond the ranch. “I know what you mean.”
“You feel like you belong here too?” Shade asks.
I give him a wry smile. “Define belong here.”
“There’s something about Colorado that speaks to your soul and you want to stay here long enough to figure out what it is, right?” His eyes tell me he knows what I was really saying. That people rarely fully accept me wherever I am.
“Yeah. Something like that.”
“For the record, there’s a low-key undercurrent of acceptance,” Jackal says. “Even though they fuck up on your pronouns, occasionally.”
The coffee pot bubbles and hisses, and I release their hands.
“Finish making the coffee, Wild,” Shade says.
Jackal shoulder checks him gently. “Only because you asked nicely.”
“Wild?” I ask.
“Long story,” Shade says without any further explanation.
There’s a quiet silence as Jackal makes the coffee, asking me how I take it, until the cups appear on the counter.
“I don’t like being left out of the solution,” I say. “It puts me in a box I don’t want to be put in.”
Shade looks over at all the equipment. “Then don’t stay in it. You’re more powerful with those keys than the rest of us are. Do your part.”
“Security. I said I’d set up a full security system with proximity sensors for the club and for Catfish’s mom.”
Jackal turns to smile at Shade. “Remember how you won my mom over?”
“Shut up, Wild.” Shade looks at me. “Not telling you that story either. We should go take a walk through the house, come up with some plans of our own.”
I take my coffee mug over to the table with my laptop on it and make a video call to Vex.
“How’s my favorite troublemaker settling in?” he asks when his face appears on the screen. He’s backlit by neon server lights and looks as though he hasn’t slept for a week.
“I’m taking you up on the offer of helping me help Colorado. I need to secure them.”
Vex’s shoulders relax, as if what I’m asking is less than he was expecting. “What do you need?”
“Everything,” I say, running my fingers over the handle of my coffee mug.
“Ground-to-sky coverage. Physical locks. Biometric gates so people can get in and out fast without having to worry about keys. Motion sensors. They’re lucky they have a long road up to the land the clubhouse is on.
Basically, a digital and physical fortress layered so deep that the NSA can’t make it inside. ”
Vex laughs. “I love it when you talk dirty. I’ll hook you up with an air-gapped system running the custom OS I built for our clubhouse. Real-time monitoring, facial recognition, the works. Do they have a generator?”
“Given the amount of snow we keep getting, I wouldn’t be surprised if they don’t have one as standard. But I’ll check.”
“Ask Grudge or Atom. I think we should also consider solar backups with battery storage. I seem to recall Colorado having the clearest blue skies in the summer. A combination of the two will help you live through a siege.”
Just as I’m about to ask another question, Calista throws her arms around Vex’s neck and places her chin on his shoulder.
“You couldn’t wait ten minutes before hijacking this call, could you?” Vex asks, patting Calista’s hands.
Calista’s grin is beautiful. “And let you have all the fun? Plus, you always forget the basics, like network segmentation, when you get overexcited.”
“That sounds dirty,” I say. “And there are some things a kid shouldn’t hear Mommy and Daddy talking about.”
Vex stands. “I’m gonna finish the specs and mail them to you.” He cups the back of Calista’s neck and kisses her. “Man, you taste good.”
The strong and formidable businesswoman I know melts. “I love you too.”
She watches him leave and then sits down in the chair he just vacated. Her mood shifts a beat as she settles into the camera, her posture softening. “How are you holding up?” she asks. “Really?”
“They’re different out here. Less connected than King and his men, but yet…they deeply care for each other.”
Calista smiles as if she can read my mind. “I didn’t ask about any of the Outlaws. I asked how you were.”
“I’m fine. Good, I guess.” I hesitate for a moment as I think about last night in the cabin. About the half-eaten snacks and the fire and the feel of his skin beneath my fingertips.
“Oh my God,” Calista says, noticing the shift in my tone. “Did one of them get under your skin?”
I reach for my coffee cup and take a hot gulp. “Maybe.”
“Wren!” Calista’s mouth is open for a second. “Who?”
“Catfish.”
“One second,” Calista says. She leans and looks over her shoulder, then starts tapping on Vex’s laptop. “I’m looking him up on Vex’s database.”
“You’re hacking his laptop?”
Calista laughs. “It’s not exactly hacking when he lets me sit at his laptop, then disappears.”
“Semantics.”
“Holy cheekbones, he’s a pretty one. Blond curls, blue eyes, shoulders that look like they could pump their own body weight.”
“That’s the one.”
Her grin softens. “You really like him.”
“I do. But it’s terrifying. He makes me feel safe, and that’s a feeling I don’t trust easily.”
“I hear you. Ending up married to a biker wasn’t something I expected either.”
I tilt my head as she raises her wedding ring to show me. “Can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“How do you do it, Cal? You’re this strong, independent, and more than capable woman. But you let Vex…lead. You belong to him. Wear a cut that says you’re his property. How do you let him have that kind of power over you?”
Calista doesn’t flinch at the question. Instead, she sits back in the seat and thinks for a moment.
“I do it because it’s not really about power.
It’s about trust. I choose Vex. Every day.
I let him carry me sometimes because I know he won’t drop me.
I know he’ll make decisions that always position my best interests at the center.
He doesn’t take anything from me, because I give it to him.
When it’s real, that kind of surrender has nothing to do with power or gender.
It’s not weakness. It’s trust and love and…
peace. And, God, now I sound like a John Lennon lyric. ”
My throat tightens at the explanation, because I feel it all the way down to my boots. “I think I love him, Cal.”
“Good,” she says. “Fall hard. Because if he’s really worth it, he’ll catch you.”
We end the call, and I place an order for all the things Vex sent in his email to stop myself from calling Catfish to see how he’s doing. It’s so tempting, but distraction can be deadly. And he doesn’t know what he’s walking into.
Jackal makes a pasta dish from food we had kicking around in the fridge. Some ham and eggs and a sauce he called a makeshift carbonara. It’s tasty, and we talk while we eat.
Well, Jackal and I do. I can see Shade doesn’t speak anywhere near as often as Jackal does, but, occasionally, he adds a few words here and there.
I feel an extra layer of safety beyond Catfish.
That I’m safe with people who understand me.
Even though our lives are different, there is overlap in our stories.
We all know how it feels to be hated for who we are, for simply living our lives.
When there’s a hammering at the door, Jackal and Shade transform as they draw their weapons. Without a word, they separate, Jackal approaching the front door, Shade, the rear.
It takes a moment, but then, I hear laughter.
“Who was it?” I ask Jackal as he walks back into the kitchen.
“Brace yourself, kiddo,” he says. “The reinforcements have arrived.”
“Hey, Wren,” Quinn says as she bounds into the kitchen after him, swiftly followed by more women.
Raven’s thick black hair is swooped up into a carefree bun, and a thick cream sweater hugs her baby bump.
Greer is holding a casserole dish and three bags of chips.
Ember is carrying two bottles of wine that I notice are alcohol-free. Lucy holds two more that aren’t.