Chapter 1 - Lily #2
Lord Hayes didn’t seem to notice. He shook his head. "And where am I to find a replacement? What about Rebecca? Have you thought about her?"
Her tears threatened to catapult over her lower lashes. "I've thought of little else. I don't wish to leave her."
"Then don't," he said. "It's as simple as that. You should stay."
"I cannot disappoint my brother."
"Why does he require your presence more than we do?"
Lily thought that it would do little good to explain the full circumstances to Lord Hayes, that William had returned from India wealthy beyond measure, and now Lily and her seven sisters were to be presented--in slightly less-shocking batches of four--so that they might have a Season and find good noblemen to marry.
It sounded like a fanciful dream--something made up--even to her, and she was to live it.
Her silence only served to deepen Lord Hayes’ frown, to turn his expression into something truly foreboding.
“No. I forbid it,” Lord Hayes finally said.
He sent the letter sliding back at her across the polished surface. On instinct, she caught it before it hit the ground.
Lily’s eyes went wide. “Excuse me, my lord?”
“You are not excused. In fact, you’re not permitted to leave the grounds. Not until you tell me who you truly are.” He lowered his gaze to his ledgers and picked up his pen.
Lily stood frozen in fear, the letter of resignation clenched in her hands. When it became clear that Lord Hayes would say nothing further, she turned and let herself out of his study, closing the door behind her.
She stood there stupidly for long moments, their interaction rolling through her mind.
I should have you arrested.
The thought had Lily nearly running for the stairs. That’s undoubtedly what the man intended to do. Why else would he command her not to leave?
If he called for a magistrate, she would be questioned.
She would have to tell them the truth, under the burden of the law.
Even though she'd undoubtedly be acquitted were there a trial--she was nobility and she'd done nothing truly wrong--a trial would be public.
Her name, and her family's name, would be dragged through that special mud unique to England's finest gossips.
There would be no point to any of the Preston ladies having a Season after that--not when it was discovered that Lily had been living under the same roof as an unmarried gentleman for four months.
The ton had everything--money, prestige, a life of essential leisure--but what truly excited them were rumors.
And there was nothing quite as delicious to the gossips as a young lady gone astray.
It hardly mattered that Lord Hayes hadn't so much as brushed Lily’s hand.
Everyone would leap to the most salacious possibilities.
Her reputation would be ruined, and all her sisters' reputations along with it.
And not even all the gold in England--which Claire claimed William had--could shield them from the censure.
Lily ran up the stairs, using the balustrade to pull herself upward. Thankfully, she didn't see a single other servant, or they would have known something was terribly wrong. Lily's eyes were wide, her breath coming in pants by the time she made it to the small bedchamber attached to the nursery.
Rebecca was only five--she would be moved to one of the grand family bedchambers on her birthday the following month. It was nearly all she could speak of, and Lily's heart clenched that she wouldn't be there to witness the little girl's joy that day.
Lily locked the door behind her and pressed her back to the wall, surveying her bedroom.
It was a plain, whitewashed room, with a comfortable chair angled toward the small grate, a writing desk pushed beneath the narrow window, a small wardrobe, and a tiny antechamber--no more than a closet, really, for her more private needs.
For the last four months, this had been home, but it was home no longer. Now, it looked more like a prison cell. A moment later, she was on her hands and knees, dragging the old carpetbag from where she'd stored it beneath the single bed.
She pillaged the wardrobe. It took only a handful of minutes to pack, as she hadn't purchased a single item except for a new set of hairpins when her old ones had snapped in half. All the other funds had been sent to Claire in London.
Lily had thought she'd been saving her sisters when she came here. Now she wondered if she'd condemned them all.
She took a deep breath and glanced in the small mirror hanging above the washbasin.
She was pleased to see that other than a slight flush to her ivory cheeks and a rather grim set of her mouth, she wore no evidence of the calamity that had befallen her only minutes ago.
With effort she smiled softly and opened the adjoining door to the nursery.
As was customary, there was a large difference between the nursery and that of the governess's quarters. This room had two fireplaces so that the precious resident might never catch cold, as well as large, thickly paned windows that were opened to freshen the air.
For all his sour temper, Lord Hayes could not be faulted to the care he extended to his only child. He'd assigned a pair of maids to the nursery. Every day when Lily brought Rebecca downstairs, the room was aired, the linens changed, and each spare speck of dust cast away with extreme prejudice.
The maids were there now--Mary and Ofelia--each sitting in a chair near their respective fires.
Lily knew without looking that the buckets hanging from sturdy hooks out of child's reach on either side of each fireplace were filled with water.
There were also four large cans sitting in the hallway that were never to be used for bathing--they were for the risk of fire and fire alone.
When Lily had first arrived, she'd asked Mrs. Clark about the measures. The woman had shook her head with such a grim expression that Lily hadn't dared ask again. It was only later that Lily had noticed the scars on the woman’s hands.
And then, the first time she'd helped bathe Rebecca, Lily had understood more completely.
The darling girl had a gnarled, silver scar on her hip.
It appeared as if it had occurred long ago--the scar didn't pain Rebecca, and there was plenty of healthy pink skin surrounding it.
That might have been the moment Lily broke off a large portion of her heart and handed it over to the girl, much like a shared biscuit.
Rebecca's past suffering worried Lily--was the house prone to fires? But after a month, she had relaxed enough to sleep halfway through the night without rushing in to check on the little girl. The first time she'd done so, the night maids had nearly come out of their skin with surprise.
The little girl in question was now sprawled at the base of her grand dollhouse, pudgy hands carefully arranging the carved chairs around the dining set.
Lily thought it unwise that such precious furniture had been gifted to a small girl who was prone to accidentally breaking things.
However, every time there was a mishap with a diminutive chair or a dresser, an identical replacement took it's place within a fortnight.
Now, Lily was careful to smile at both the maids. "Ofelia, will you please order a bath and arrange for a tea tray to be brought up? And be sure to take a moment for yourself in the meantime."
Ofelia stood and stretched, shooting a grateful smile at Lily before exiting the room. That left Mary at the farthest fireplace. She wouldn't be able to hear what Lily planned on murmuring to Rebecca.
"Rebecca, darling." Lily couldn't help but run her hand lightly over the girl's dark curls. "Do you remember the book I read you, about Sir Vernon's grand adventure?"
Lily nodded up at her with huge brown eyes that were so much like her father's. "Yes."
It was a fanciful children's book, with ink drawings of a man travelling to far countries in a giant air balloon.
"Can you keep a secret?" Lily asked. When the girl nodded with bright eyes, Lily said, "I am to go on a grand adventure, too. I'm only telling you because you are the person in this entire household that I trust the most."
Lily knew that it was a blatant manipulation, but the little girl was terrible at keeping secrets.
She hoped that Rebecca would hold onto this one long enough for Lily to climb out a back window.
In any case, Lily couldn't leave without telling the girl goodbye, without offering some sort of salve for her absence.
"Can I come, too?"
"Not this time." Lily smiled and prayed that she could hold back her tears to keep from frightening Rebecca. "Someone needs to stay and take care of Mary and Ofelia and Mrs. Clark while I'm gone."
"And Papa, too?" she asked, quite seriously.
Lily nodded. "Your papa, too."
She wrapped the girl in a great hug and kissed the top of her head.
"When will you be back?" Rebecca whispered, shooting a glance down the nursery to make sure Mary wasn't listening.
"I'm not sure yet." Lily winced at the lie--she would most likely never return. "But I shall do my best to write you and tell you of all that I see."
"And you can tell me the rest when you get back?"
"Of course, darling. Now, I must go. Sir Vernon’s great balloon is waiting. But I had to tell you how very much I love you and how desperately I'll miss you while I'm gone. You must be extra good for me, won't you? For I will hear a report of your behavior from Mrs. Clark every day."
"I will." Rebecca's voice was muffled from where she pressed against Lily's chest, returning her hug with an earnestness that had Lily's eyes pricking with tears. "I promise."
"Very good." Lily set her back and smiled down at her. It cost her much, that smile. "Then let Mary and Ofelia bathe you and eat all the good things on your tray as a start."
"I will."
"I love you, Rebecca."
"I love you too, Miss Hughes."
Lily's heart very nearly broke then. It was a reminder that the basis for all of it had been a lie, even though her affection for the girl was very real, indeed.
She gave Rebecca one last hug and set her back before the dollhouse.
When Lily turned back at the doorway, Rebecca was rearranging her dining room once again.