Chapter 28
MAGGIE
I tear open the envelope, unfold the paper and rest it on the counter. Above is a poster of Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman’s Practical Magic – tonight’s film.
His handwriting is full of loops and swoops and I take a moment to let the implications of this land. This took a lot for him to do.
Dear Maggie,
I have no idea if any of this will make sense on the page, but I’m hoping that Dr Levin is right and that all of these words are somehow buried deep inside my cortex.
I smile; he’s been to see Dr Levin. Jack’s trying to read again.
I’ve been thinking about how to say what I want two to say but…
I guess it boils down down to, I miss you.
I miss sitting next to you and watching your face light up at the screen.
I miss your laugh and the way your hair falls from behind your ears.
I miss the way you sea see me. But must most of all, I miss us.
I know things have moved quickly, and I know it’s wrong to feel this way about someone I’ve only known for a short time. But I’m happiest when I’m with you.
Help me understand.
Give us another chance.
We deserve that shot at a happy ever after.
Jack
I fold the letter over.
‘What happened?’ Romy prompts. ‘With Jack?’
‘I… tried to explain who I am and… It’s a lot. I’m a lot. I mean, you’ve seen him. He deserves to have a girlfriend who he can at least touch for Christ’s sake. Who would make his life easier. Not harder.’
His words circle my mind: Help me understand. We deserve a shot at a happy ever after.
‘Look. I might be the last person on earth to give advice on dating and finding romantic love, but I know a thing or two about people. I saw the way you two were together and I’ve only seen that amount of chemistry on the screen.
I spent my married life pretending to be someone I’m not, trying to force myself into a shape small enough to accommodate him.
Now, I know who I am, I know what I like, and if I ever felt like dating someone other than myself then it will be on my terms with a partner who fits next to me without either of us having to bend.
’ She reaches out a hand then drops it. ‘Show him who you are, Mags. But don’t bend.
You shouldn’t ever need to pretend to be somebody else. Now, go.’
‘But your date…’
‘My date can wait.’
If I could, I would kiss her cheek.
* * *
The air is rich with the smell of seaweed, the salt in the sea mist already clinging to my hair as I scan the streets.
I pull my pink fur around me, heading through side streets and along the narrow coastal road; to my right, the buildings lean forward like a crowd lining the streets to wave to an important visitor, each building different, some short and struggling to see beyond the taller forms. My lilac heels click as I make my way through town, until I see the creamy apricot light spilling out onto the kerb. I slow down and catch my breath.
It’s time I stopped running away from a chance of happiness.