22. Penelope
Ican tell I’ve shocked him. Honestly, I’ve shocked myself. I’m not sure what he was expecting me to say, but clearly, he wasn’t anticipating me verbalizing all the garbled angry thoughts that have been swirling around inside of me for the last two days into one single word. Revenge.
Parting his lips, he starts to speak, but before any words come out, he turns into the marina parking lot and slows to a stop. Unclipping his seat belt, he turns to face me, his brow furrowed in consternation. “Revenge?” he asks.
Gulliver’s huge SUV pulls up beside us, and our chance to talk privately is lost in a flurry of doors opening and people converging toward the boat. Sighing, Hawthorn climbs out of the driver’s seat and circles around to my side. I’m not sure if he intended to open my door, but I’m already standing beside the car, the door closed behind me. Taking my hand, he leads me up the gangplank and into the boat, while the rest of the group files in behind us.
Kicking off my shoes, I sit down in the armchair and curl my legs up beneath me, wishing I’d never asked to speak to everyone in the first place. A quiet one-on-one chat with Izzy would have been much easier than having to face this group of friends.
My plan this morning was to confidently assuage the school gossip by acting like a badass, then speak to my sister and ask if she and the others would be willing to meet with me. I thought I’d have the rest of the day to psych myself up to talk to them all. Only instead of things going like I’d anticipated, Hawthorn was there, and all my badass melted into a puddle of want and lust and need for him.
Instead of strutting away in my short skirt with my sexy new hair flowing behind me, I ended up jumping into Hawthorn’s arms and telling the whole school I was sleeping with him.
It takes me a few minutes to realize that the room is silent, and when I look up, five sets of eyes are all staring at me expectantly. I am not a stranger to groups of people looking at me. I’ve been paraded in front of rooms full of eligible bachelors like I was cattle at the market almost daily for years. But this feels completely different. I’m not playing the role of innocent heiress, and I have nothing anyone here wants—except Hawthorn, who just wants me.
When I catch his eye across the room, he must see the panic in my expression because he marches over to me, picks me up out of the chair, and sits back down with me in his lap.
“Penelope and I fucked to break the will,” he announces calmly. “I like her, she likes me, and now we’re together. Anyone got a problem with that?” he asks boldly, looking between his friends and waiting for them to say something.
Turning, I glare at Hawthorn, but he just shrugs at me completely unapologetic.
“But she’s a bitch, she’s the enemy,” Davis hisses angrily.
A part of me wants to sink into the seat and let the cushions smother me, because he’s right, I am the enemy. “You’re right,” I say.
“No, he’s not,” Hawthorn argues.
“He is, though. I’m an awful person. Some of the things I’ve done?—”
“Stop!” my sister shouts, interrupting me and garnering everyone’s attention. “Penelope, you don’t have to explain yourself to him or anyone else. You saved me, you saved both of us, and as far as I’m concerned, we’re good, you’re my twin,” she says imploringly.
Ignoring everyone else, I lean forward in Hawthorn’s lap and focus on my sister. “I’m so sorry, Izabella. I don’t think I’ve actually told you how sorry I am. But I am. I’m so, so sorry for how I treated you. It’s not an excuse, but our entire life, I was so jealous of you. You were smarter, nicer, and prettier. Mom and Dad were rarely home, but when they were, Mom would gush over how much everyone loved you and how they always talked about how special your eyes were. Then Great-Grandfather died, and he named me in his will, and suddenly they were interested in me. For the first time ever, I was important,” I tell her, tears filling my eyes.
Scoffing self-deprecatingly, I shake my head. “I know it’s pathetic, but I really wanted to be important to them. Overnight, I went from being the boring, stupid, ugly twin to being special, and I loved it. Suddenly, Mom and Dad said they weren’t going to travel anymore. They said I needed them to help me, and they started lavishing all this attention on me. The more compliant I was and the more I did as they said, the more attentive they were. I know it sounds like a lie, but after a while, I started believing everything they said. I believed them when they said it was okay to do things I knew were wrong. I believed them when they said we all had our roles—that mine was to be the perfect little virgin, to woo everyone on the list until they picked a husband for me, and that yours was to pick up my slack and be me when I couldn’t. I lost myself to the bullshit lies they told me because I was so desperate to be loved by them, and it wasn’t until that day, when they attacked you, that I woke up and saw how toxic our relationship with them was?—”
“It’s okay,” Izabella says, cutting me off.
“No, it’s not,” I protest.
“It is,” she whispers. “Because I think I would have done the same if I’d been the one named in that will,” she admits, getting up from her chair and moving toward me.
Compelled, I stand too, meeting her in the middle of the room. “No, you wouldn’t,” I say, accepting the hug she offers me, carefully wrapping my arms around her, and taking the comfort she’s giving me, even though I don’t deserve it.
“Penelope is going to move in here with me,” Hawthorn announces, his posture relaxed as he lounges in the chair I just vacated.
“She’s what?” Gulliver shouts.
“I’m what?” I cry.
“You’re moving in here with me,” Hawthorn says, rising out of his chair and strolling toward me, his eyes daring me to argue.
“No, I’m not.”
“She can come and stay with us,” Gulliver says, pulling Izzy into his chest and wrapping her in his arms while she softly cries.
“She’s not moving in with me,” Davis says, beneath his breath but loud enough that we all hear him.
Hawthorn’s eyes narrow, and instead of reaching for me, he steps past me, pulls back his fist, and punches Davis in the face. “Enough,” he snarls. “If Izzy can forgive her, then you need to shut the fuck up. She’s apologized for what she did, and none of us have any fucking clue what it was like for them both in that house with their parents. So, you don’t get to be her judge, jury, and fucking executioner. If you can’t put your issues and your smart mouth aside, you can get the fuck out of our home.”
Clutching his nose in his hands, Davis’s eyes widen in shock as he stares up at Hawthorn like he has no idea who he is. “Fuck, fine.” Turning to look at me, Davis shrugs. “I’ll keep my mouth shut.”
Nodding, I fight the urge to tell Davis I deserve every ounce of all of their hatred, but I know Hawthorn doesn’t believe that, so I stay quiet.
“Princess, you’re moving in here,” Hawthorn says again, his tone brooking no argument. “You hate being at the hotel, I hate you being at the hotel, and we’re together now, so you’re moving in with me.”
I start to protest, but he arches his eyebrow, silently warning me to do as I’m told. A rush of heat bursts inside of me, and when he crooks his finger, I willingly go to him, letting him wrap me in the safety of his arms.
“I think you moving onto the boat with Hawthorn is a great idea,” Izzy announces, a sly smile spreading across her lips.
“You do?” I ask.
“It’s perfect,” Izzy says, flashing a conspiratorial grin at Hawthorn before turning her attention back to me. “Is that what you wanted to talk to us all about? You and Hawthorn?”
“No,” I blurt, suddenly remembering why I planned this meeting to start off with and how ridiculous it all feels in the cold, rational light of day.
“So, what did you want to talk to us about?” she asks, sitting back down beside Gulliver on the couch.
Exhaling, I let Hawthorn guide me back to the chair we were sharing, sitting down in his lap. “I wanted to talk to you about Mom and Dad,” I say quietly, feeling the tension build in the room just from the mention of our parents.
“What the fuck about them?” Gulliver growls, pulling my sister into him protectively as if he can shelter her from whatever it is I plan on saying with his arms.
“God, this all made so much more sense last night. It seems a bit ridiculous now,” I mutter, running my fingers through my hair, absentmindedly trying to make it smooth and perfect.
“Have they been in touch with you?” Izzy asks.
“No. God no, and I doubt they will,” I say quickly. “But last night, I got to thinking, and really none of this seems fair.”
“Life isn’t fair. Please tell me we aren’t here because you want us all to feel sorry for you,” Davis hisses, his lips twisted into an ugly line as he stares me down.
“Give it a rest, Davis. She’s Izzy’s sister, and Hawthorn’s girl,” Kip says, his tone an unexpected warning. “You already got a knee to the balls and a punch to the face. Why the fuck are you acting like such an asshole today?”
“Look, Davis, I know you think I deserve to lose everything, and I’ll be the first to admit that everything I’m dealing with now is probably karma’s way of getting its own back on me for all the shitty things I’ve done in the last few years. But I’m here trying to make amends, to put my life back together, now that my entire future has been changed,” I say.
“You saw how wrong things were and you started to put them right, constantly blaming yourself isn’t going to help anyone,” Izzy says, reminding us all why she’s the nice twin and I’m not.
“But that’s the thing,” I announce. “I didn’t get to run away from everything I’ve done. I’m trying to make amends while I figure out how to put my shambles of a life back together, and they’ve gotten off scot-free.”
“Who? Your parents?” Hawthorn asks.
“Yes. We were kids when all this started. I’m not trying to say it was all them, but they coached me, they drilled those rules into me over and over until they were so ingrained, I’ll never be able to forget them. Mom told me what to do, what to say, and how to behave. She conditioned me to believe that all of our lives would be ruined if we didn’t play our part in securing all our futures,” I tell them, looking between the faces of the guys in the room, before moving back to my sister.
“They did it to me too,” Izzy says, her voice quiet and meek. “They made me believe that if I stopped doing what they said, that we’d lose the money and it would all be my fault.”
“Exactly, and if we stepped out of line, they doled out consequences.”
“They hit you too?” Hawthorn growls, his voice hard and lethal.
“No,” I say, shaking my head.
“They did other stuff, didn’t they?” Izzy asks, her voice barely above a whisper.
“It doesn’t matter,” I say, crossing my arms over my chest.
“They starved you,” she gasps. “And humiliated you and ignored you. I remember…” Izzy breathes, her voice cracking as she covers her mouth with her hand. “Oh my god, they did all of that to you, and I forgot. I was so angry at you that I never did anything. They treated you that way for years, and I never said a word.”
“I want revenge!” I shout, needing to silence her, to make her shut up about the things I don’t ever want to think about again. “It’s not fair that they just get to walk away from this. It’s not fair that they get to just pretend we don’t exist, that they weren’t as complicit in this as I was.”
“Penelope,” Izzy says, moving toward me on wobbly legs.
“No,” I shriek, panic-stricken as I lift up a hand to ward her away, to stop her from bringing all those memories down on me. “I want them to feel at least a little of what we felt. I want them to understand that they don’t get to just forget about us. I want revenge,” I cry through a broken sob.
“But they’re not here,” Kip says quietly.
“I know, and they’re still playing with us from the other side of the world. Because of them, we can’t go into the house we grew up in—the house we’ve spent more time in than either of them. Because of them, we’ve had to start over with almost nothing. Because of them, we don’t have parents, we don’t have a family, and it’s not fair.”
“It’s not fair,” my twin agrees, nodding her head, even as tears stream down her face.
“I want them to suffer, even if it’s only a bit, even if it is only a blip to them. It’s not fair that they just get to forget us and everything we’ve done. I want revenge, and you should want it too,” I say, imploring her to understand, to feel the way I do.
She nods, slowly to start, then gets stronger as she reaches out and takes my hand. “What do you want to do?”
“I have no idea,” I say, the sound half laugh, half sob. “But I can’t just let them walk away without knowing that I’ve done something.”
“We can do it,” Gulliver says, moving to Izzy’s side, physically supporting her with his arm around her waist.
“Hell yeah, we can, we’re the future generations of five of the most powerful old money families in the country. Between us, we can make them feel this,” Kip says, jumping up and coming to join us.
“Oh, this is going to be fun,” Davis says, laughing maniacally.
“Let’s make them suffer,” Hawthorn growls, curling his palm possessively around my nape.
“I want to piss them off. I want to annoy the hell out of them and make them hurt in every way possible. I want them to suffer, I want revenge,” I pant, letting my body melt into Hawthorn’s and knowing without question that he’ll hold me up, that he will be there and be strong for me.
“Together, we can do this. Together, we can make them regret being the shittiest parents ever,” Izzy says, squeezing my hand tightly.
The will of a dead man ruined my life, and now somehow, it’s helping me put it back together again. Money is power, and I lost a fortune, but maybe I found something much more valuable.
They say revenge is sweet, but the best form of revenge is to be better than those you seek justice from. Perhaps when this is all over, I might be able to feel that way, but for now, I’m looking forward to using all those lessons my parents taught me to reap a little of what they helped me sow.
My name is Penelope Emerson Rhodes, and I’m not a good person. I’ve done things I’m not proud of, but I have a sister, a boyfriend, and a life I’m ready to start embracing.
My parents spent most of my life ignoring me and my twin, then they spent four years using us. Now they think they can just walk away.
They’re wrong.
* * *
My body starts to wilt as I watch the retreating forms of my sister, Gulliver, Kip, and Davis disappear down the gangplank and away from Hawthorn’s boat. Today has been intense, and all of my adrenaline-filled bravado is starting to dissolve. It’s barely even seven p.m., but I’m exhausted.
This afternoon has been a lot, but I did it. I made peace with my sister, admitted my feelings for Hawthorn, and managed to rally everyone together to take a stand and exact some revenge against my parents. It feels like I’ve crammed a few years’ worth of action into a few hours, and now I need to sleep for a month to recover.
“You hungry?” Hawthorn asks, prowling toward me with his predatory walk that makes me want to beg him for attention.
I shake my head. “Do you ever think of anything other than food?” I tease.
“I think about sex,” he says with a smirk.
“We already had sex today, several times,” I say, stifling a yawn.
Curling his strong arms around my waist, he lifts me into the air, cradling me in his arms as he holds me close to his chest. “Let me feed you, then we can go to bed.”
“I need to go back to the hotel,” I argue, but even I can hear how weak my protest is.
“Let’s watch a movie in bed, naked,” he purrs, completely ignoring my suggestion that I leave. “Gulliver’s going to call into school in the morning and let them know that we’re not going to be in for a few days. Tonight, we can snuggle and eat takeout, and tomorrow we’ll start plotting your revenge.”
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I rest my head against his shoulder as he carries me into his bedroom, peels back the covers, and places me gently down in the middle of the bed.
“I don’t have any clothes here,” I protest weakly.
“You don’t have any at the hotel either.” He laughs, stripping me out of my blazer and blouse. “And you do have clothes here, because I had Fitzy bring back all the stuff you picked the other day, it’s all in the closet.”
Yawning widely, I lift my butt and pull my skirt off, leaving me in just my bra, panties, and socks. Hawthorn’s eyes heat, and bending down, he presses a hot kiss against the swell of my breast, moving lower and sucking my nipple into his mouth through the delicate lace of my bra.
A mischievous smirk lifts one side of his lips as he pulls back and shucks out of his own uniform, dropping it to the floor until he’s naked, his hard dick glistening with precum. “I can’t wait to get used to having you here. In our bed every night.” Climbing onto the mattress, he crawls between my legs, positioning himself so he’s caging me in, his dick rubbing against my panties.
Reaching up, I wrap my arms around his neck. It feels strange to be touching him this freely, but everything that’s happened today has changed things between us. I don’t know how long this will last, or if I even deserve a happily ever after, but for the moment, I want to make the most of being his.
“What do you want for dinner?” he asks, unfastening my bra as he grinds his dick against me, leaning down and pressing a kiss to my neck.
Inhaling sharply, I close my eyes, indulging in the feeling of his lips kissing a path along the sensitive hollow where my neck meets my shoulder. “You,” I say on a half gasp when his teeth replace his lips, nipping me, then soothing the pain with his tongue.
“You want to eat me?” he asks, his voice a seductive growl.
Heat barrels through me, tinting my cheeks red as an erotic image of me taking Hawthorn’s dick in my mouth fills my mind. I’ve never given a blow job before, but even as the fear of the unknown scares me, a sense of power follows.
Lifting my chin, I lock gazes with Hawthorn and nod, watching as his lips twitch into a salacious grin. “You sure?”
I nod again, and his smile gets even wider.
“Panties off, then on your knees, Princess. I want to watch as I feed you,” he growls, his voice low and raspy.
Lifting off me, Hawthorn moves to stand at the side of the bed, his hard dick gripped tightly in his hand. He watches as I slide my panties down my legs and drop them to the floor, then sink to my knees at his feet. An intense sense of humbling submission engulfs me, and a tremor of intense arousal pulses through me. Running his fingers along my jaw, he guides my face up so I’m looking up at him, and I can see my own need reflected back in his eyes.
“Fuck, Princess, the sight of you like that is…” He trails off, like he can’t even find the words.
Exhaling shakily, I watch his muscles clench as he squeezes his length. “Do you want my dick, Penelope?” he asks gruffly.
I nod.
Sliding his fingers that are cupping my jaw to my mouth, he presses the pad of his thumb against my lower lip and drags it down.
“Open,” he orders.
Parting my lips, I keep my eyes on his as he pushes his thumb into my mouth.
“Suck.” His gravelly voice takes on a rough, dominant tone that makes goose bumps rise on my arms, and my sex clenches excitedly.
Curling my tongue around his thumb, I suck, tasting the salt of his skin and groaning when he pulls it free from my mouth and rubs the wetness across my bottom lip.
“Perfect,” he praises. “Now open wide and let me feed you.”
Doing as he asks, I open my mouth, and he guides his dick onto my tongue. The thick head forces me to open wider, and he pauses, biting at his lip, his eyes hooded while he watches me take his cock into my mouth.
With our gazes locked together, he swallows thickly, and I know he’s waiting for me to do this on my own. Lifting my hands to rest on his thighs, I lean forward, taking as much of his cock as I can, before the head hits the back of my throat and I gag.
“Easy,” he warns, tangling his fingers in my hair and taking control.
Guided by instinct and an intense desire to please him, I lick and suck on the head of his dick, letting him move my head forward, then guiding me back until I’m bobbing on his dick, laving his velvety smooth skin with my tongue as my hands grip his thighs.
His fingers tighten in my hair, and the sound of his low growl fills the air. “Jesus, Princess. That feels so fucking good. I want you to take more of me.”
God, I love it when he tells me what to do. It’s like my thoughts settle and a wave of calm washes over me. Pushing forward again, I suck more of his length into my mouth. He’s so big there’s no way I could take him all, but I try, gagging again when the head hits the back of my throat.
“Fuck,” he hisses, pumping his hips in rhythm with me as I suck and lick at his dick like it’s my favorite treat. I never expected to enjoy this, but I am. My clit is pulsing, and heat bubbles at my core every time he groans and rasps.
“I’m going to fuck your mouth, Pen,” he warns, tightening his grip on my hair until it’s just on the verge of pain. Holding my head still, he carefully pumps his dick in and out of my mouth while I hollow my cheeks and suck, trying not to gag as he pushes deep, holding his cock in place, before retreating again. I want him to come, I want to taste him, but before I get a chance, he pulls his dick free, his eyes blazing with heat as he lifts me off the floor and sits down on the edge of the bed with me in his lap.