Chapter 3
THREE
Morning
Claudia
Thankfully, I wake before Savannah even stirs, hand still on the car seat's handle. The room is dim, the first gray light of morning spilling through the slats in the blinds. I turn to my side and glance down, heart full, as I watch her sleep and listen to the sound of her breathing beside me.
When I finally lean over and unbuckle her from the car seat, she makes a tiny sound of protest, halfway between a sigh and a squeak.
Her little body stretches instinctively, arms reaching up, legs kicking weakly against the blanket.
Her fingers uncurl, slow and deliberate, before she brings one to her mouth, missing her thumb but trying anyway.
I feel guilty that she slept in the car seat all night, rather than in the crib I have in an online cart, waiting to purchase when I find our new home. But the seat is safer than the bed.
I smooth my palm over her hair, soft dark hair with the faintest curl starting to show, and whisper, “Good morning, my sweet.”
Her eyelids flutter lashes thick against her cheeks, and her lips purse in a sleepy pout. I lift her gently into my arms, and she gives another soft stretch, her tiny fist brushing against my collarbone.
When her mouth starts to search, her chin bobbing in that familiar way, I shift her in my arms and pull my shirt aside.
She latches almost immediately, her little brow furrowing in concentration before her whole body relaxes.
The sound that follows is the quiet, rhythmic swallow that’s become my favorite sound in the world. She’ll never be hungry.
Her cheeks are full and pink, her eyes still half-closed, lashes trembling as she drifts in and out of that drowsy space between hunger and comfort. One small hand rests against my chest, the other curls into the fabric of my shirt.
I brush my thumb along the curve of her jaw and breathe her in — that faint, warm scent that’s all baby, my baby.
When she slows, I lift her carefully to my shoulder, rubbing small circles on her back until she gives a soft, contented burp that almost makes me laugh.
“Good girl,” I whisper against her hair.
She stirs, eyes blinking open now, blue-green like shallow water under the sun in Maui. Her lips work silently for a second before she gives a small, sleepy smile.
“Hungry still?” I ask, even though I already know.
I settle her on the other side, and she nuzzles against me, patient but with purpose. She latches again, slower this time, her eyelids heavy but her little hand still gripping my shirt as if to make sure I don’t go anywhere.
“I’ll never leave you.” I promise.
When Savannah finishes, I lift her to my shoulder, rubbing slow circles on her back. She lets out a burp that’s far louder than her size should allow.
I laugh softly. “That was a good one, my sweet.”
From somewhere outside the door, Nalani laughs too, the sound warm and amused.
I smile and whisper to Savannah, “Guess you impressed your new auntie.”
Carefully, I pull the blanket over my shoulder and stand, stretching out my stiff legs before opening the bedroom door. Nalani is sitting up on the couch, swallowed up by the comforter, hair pulled up in a messy bun.
“I’m sorry if we woke you,” I say quietly.
She shakes her head, grinning. “You and I are going to have a long conversation about you constantly apologizing.”
I can’t help laughing. “Can we do that after I pee?”
“Oh my God, go,” she says, laughing harder now. “Gimme Savannah and pee, shower, do whatever you need to do.”
I hesitate, Savannah squirming lightly in my arms. “Are you sure?”
“Of course, I’m sure.” Nalani reaches for her, her movements confident and gentle. Savannah settles against her chest almost instantly. “There’s shampoo, conditioner, and body wash in there. Use as much as you want. I’ve got more coming with the groceries.”
“You’re the best,” I say, already halfway to the bathroom.
“There’s one fresh towel hanging up,” she calls after me.
I glance back and smile. “The absolute best.”
The bathroom door closes softly behind me, and am happy I can hear Nalani talking to Savannah, reminding myself to trust my gut, that she is safe, that Nalani is a good person, and a KET sister, one of the good ones.
“But who cares about that when I am holding you? I swear my heart is going to break for the third time when you and your mommy head onto the next chapter in your life.” Nalani says to Savannah. “You wanna know why?”
Of course she doesn’t answer.
“I’ve never held a baby before, and it had a lot to do with worrying I wouldn’t do it right, because I wasn’t raised by a woman who had one motherly bone in her body. But honestly, I’m not sure that would matter much—there is something so special about you.”
Like I said, she’s one of the good ones. Content that she is in good hands, I pee and then turn on the shower.
Steam follows me out of the bathroom as I tighten the towel around me. My hair is dripping, my skin still flushed from the heat, and all I can think about is finding clean clothes and hydrating.
Then I freeze.
There’s a woman I don’t recognize standing in the middle of the living room, holding Savannah like she owns her.
She’s gorgeous in a polished, effortless way — designer jeans, heels, a silk blouse that probably costs more than my entire suitcase, and an expression so sharp it could cut glass, and it’s directed at me.
I blink once, twice, trying to figure out what I’ve just walked into.
Nalani looks somewhere between apologetic and amused. “Hey, you’re out,” she says, far too casually for the fact that there’s a stranger in her apartment… holding my daughter.
I grip the towel a little tighter. “I—yes. Who…?”
“This is Sofie,” Nalani says. “She showed up while you were in the shower.”
Sofie tilts her head, assessing me the way someone might study an art piece they’re not sure they like yet. “You must be the mysterious Claudia.”
Mysterious. That’s one word for walking into a room half-naked to find a stranger cooing at your child.
“It took way longer than it should have to convince her that Savannah isn’t mine,” Nalani mutters under her breath, “and that you’re not my girlfriend.”
Sofie shrugs, “You have no idea how worried I was. Nalani being in my City, in this place? I thought she’d been kidnapped. Then this adorably baby and now you?”
I blink, not sure whether to laugh or apologize. “Sorry for existing, I guess.”
“She promised me,” Sofie says dramatically, turning back to Nalani, “that we’d be partners if we hadn’t found the right guy by thirty. Then I walk in, and she’s living with this beautiful woman and a baby.”
Nalani laughs so hard she nearly drops her coffee. “You’re ridiculous.”
Sofie smiles at Savannah, who is staring up at her. “A little.”
“We met on the plane. My hotel reservation was… messed up. She offered to let us stay the night. It’s been a long twenty-four hours.”
“That’s an understatement.” Nalani smiles.
Sofie gives me a look that’s half concern, half curiosity. “Your reservation was messed up?”
This woman is Nalani’s friend, it’s not like she’s not going to tell her at some point, so I do.
“I did a summer internship here in the city. I had a summer fling. I found out I was pregnant while writing my dissertation. When I realized I wanted to keep her, I contacted him, and told him that I wasn’t expecting anything, and wanted to tell her I used a donor. He agreed.”
“You’re kidding me,” she gasps.
“It was a fling,” I shake my head. “My choice. I can take care of her.”
“And then,” Nalani prompts.
“He wanted to meet her. I agreed to come, knowing he’s not in the position to be a father. He said he made a reservation, and well, he didn’t.”
Nalani glances at me, sympathy flickering across her face. Sofie, however, looks ready for battle.
“He hasn’t even called?” she says sharply. “Fuck him.”
I choke on a laugh. “I certainly hope she doesn’t repeat that anytime soon.”
Sofie leans down, all sweet affection again. “Aunt Sofie apologizes. I’ll stop teaching you bad words when you’re old enough to mimic me.”
Nalani clears her throat, trying not to laugh. “What do you ladies want for breakfast? I was going to make—” She holds up a bag of greens and frozen corn from the grocery haul she brought in.
Sofie’s face scrunches up. “You two are not eating that on your first morning in this city.”
Nalani rolls her eyes. “No, not this. I have eggs and turkey bacon. The salad’s for the Henny and Cock.”
“The what?”
Sofie’s eyes go wide. “I’m sorry, what?”
Nalani laughs so hard she has to grab the counter for balance.
“Oh my God, no. Not what it sounds like. Last night, when I came back down for the luggage, there was a hen just strutting around the hallway. I opened the back door to let her out, and there was a rooster waiting for her. It was adorable.”
I blink, torn between disbelief and laughter. “Chickens?”
Nalani smiles with a shrug.
Sofie points toward the door. “You need to move. This is not a farm. This is New York City.”
Nalani waves her off. “The whole reason I rented this place was because it has outdoor space. The hen house was the deciding factor.”
Sofie groans dramatically, pressing a hand to her forehead. “I came here to save you, and you’re out here adopting poultry.”
I can’t help it — I start laughing. “If it helps, they’re probably happier than most people in this city.”
Nalani grins at me over her coffee cup. “That’s what I like about you, Claudia. You get it.”
Sofie rolls her eyes. “You’re both insane.”
“Maybe,” I smile, already deciding I also like Sofie.
“Go get dressed.” Sofie orders and looks down at Savannah. “Then you, Mommy, me, and Aunt Nalani are going to get breakfast.”
“After we feed our new pets.” Nalani smiles.
“Whatever,” Sofie rolls her eyes. “Go get dressed.”
“I don’t know if I should be appalled or enchanted,” Sofie says quietly as she looks out over the small yard.
Nalani is halfway down the ramp when Sofie throws out a hand to stop her. “Tetanus!”