Chapter 7
Harper
Me: Your brother is an arse.
Phe: Ugh. What has he done now?
I lean against the cold brick of the alleyway and stare at the screen of my phone. I’m messaging in the shared group I have with Phe, Zoey and Grace.
It is my second week on the job.
If I hear my jerk-ass boss say 'make it again, three more times’ in that gravelly voice, I swear I am going to have a nervous breakdown.
I hate him for the number of times he makes me cook every dish until he deems it ‘Adequate.’
I busted my guts to deliver that menu revamp in the impossible timeframe he set. Did he acknowledge it?
Of course, not.
He exhausts me. He also leaves me aching in ways that have nothing to do with fifteen hours on my feet.
If I'd slept with him five years ago, he would have ruined me for anyone else.
But he decided for me that I couldn't handle it. That choice should have been mine.
There was something real between us. He never gave it a chance. That's what upsets me.
I tighten my fingers around my phone.
In the sliver of time between wrapping up lunch and starting the dinner prep on the first day, I managed to sneak out into the alley behind the restaurant and message my friend group. I needed to let Phe know that I was working with her brother.
Zoey: Is the Ice Commander too frosty to handle?
I’ve already mentioned his nickname to them.
Phe: Don’t sugarcoat it on my account. He can be difficult. I overlook it because he’s family.
Me: That’s an understatement. He is a nightmare boss. Extremely demanding. There is no making him happy.
Zoey: Ooh, you sound pissed off.
Me: I am.
Phe: Are you going to quit?
I sigh and tuck a loose strand of hair back into my cap.
He irritates me with his bossiness. Frustrates me with how exacting he is. Challenges me at every turn.
I want to stay angry. But the truth is, I’m cooking better than I ever have. His pressure sharpens me.
And beneath it all is that constant tension humming between us. I am so aware of him that working beside him all day is a test of focus.
Which is entirely inappropriate, since he is my boss.
Phe was there the night James and I met. She introduced us. I sensed the chemistry between us right away. And I think Phe did, too. She practically threw us together. But even then, I worried that anything between us could complicate my friendship with Phe.
In the end, nothing happened. And then I didn’t see him again.
Still, I’m not comfortable talking to her about how aware I am of him. If, by some twist of fate, something started between us and ended badly, she’d be stuck in the middle.
I don’t want to risk that.
Me: I am learning a lot from him. So, maybe it's worth it?
Phe: He wasn't always so obsessed with his job. He had time for me and our brothers. Now all he does is work.
I frown at the text.
He was still in the Marines when I first met him. He cut a dashing figure with his Jeep Wrangler, and was spontaneous enough to take me to his favorite spots in London.
He played classical music when he drove, bought me ice cream, then took me to his favorite bar, and a little Italian restaurant he loved.
When I mentioned to him that I went to culinary school, he told me that he, too, had wanted to become a chef, but had joined the Marines instead.
The chemistry between us built up all evening. And when he kissed me, it felt like he touched my soul.
He’s more focused now. Definitely more demanding. More emotionally unavailable.
I can’t imagine him being open about his feelings.
Me: He has to be obsessed to make it in the restaurant business.
Zoey: Ooh, are you defending him?
Me: Of course not. I’m simply stating a fact.
Phe: You two are more similar than you realize.
Me: What? No. We are completely different. I cook for the soul. He cooks for perfection. For me a sauce is perfect because it tastes right, but he’ll reject it because the reduction took three minutes longer than his plan allowed.
I glance up from my phone and sigh.
He goes out of his way to test me. But every time he challenges me to go beyond my comfort zone, I deliver results that are better than I thought I could.
I find myself jumping to do as he commands. And I keep going back for more.
Every day I spend with him; I improve as a chef. Besides, I want to prove myself. My pride won’t let me give up so easily. My stubbornness relishes a challenge. Maybe even, secretly enjoys being tested by him.
Phe: I mean both of you want to make it to the top of your profession. You are both hardworking and stubborn and don’t give up easily.
She is right, I suppose.
"Harper, prep is starting." Mark pops his head around the back door. "You don't want to be late."
There’s no sense giving His Royal Grumpiness another chance to find fault with me. I straighten and head back into the restaurant.
Me: Gotta go.
Zoey: Hang in there, bish.
Phe: Big hug. I’ll come by the restaurant and check in on both of you.