Chapter 11
Chapter Eleven
Awarm smile teased Charlotte’s lips as her eyes rested on Aurelia, placing her doll gently in the wooden carved bed next to her own. Holding her elbows, Charlotte watched, mesmerized, as the child spoke to the toy in dulcet tones, stroking her hair and caring for her as would a real mother.
A shuffling sound drew her attention to the hallway behind her.
Holding her skirts, Aamina rushed toward her, alarm painted all over her flushed skin. Stealing a last look at her daughter, Charlotte turned to her maid.
“Miss Charlotte! There is a situation to which we must attend!” Aamina whispered urgently, her breathing rapid as she collected herself. “My apologies, I came as fast as my feet could carry me.” The maid nodded toward the hallway, indicating to Charlotte that this matter required privacy.
They strolled to a nearby bedroom, the door snicking softly behind them.
“Lord Spencer has awoken,” Aamina said as she searched Charlotte’s expression for signs of distress.
Relief flooded her chest at the thought of Perry having survived his terrible fever. The emotion was quickly replaced with a sense of alarm.
“Has he asked for anyone? Do you think he is aware of my presence?”
“No, Miss Charlotte. He asked about another woman, and we convinced him there was only us servants. He had no reason to question us,” Aamina explained, wringing her hands. “You must be careful. We will keep our little mistress hidden away in her room. I will alert Ann.”
“Yes, Aamina.” Charlotte worried her bottom lip with her teeth, saying a silent prayer for her wonderful and extremely loyal servants.
“I will stay close to her, as will Ann. Aurelia must be kept comfortable and innocent of his presence in the house. It might arouse her curiosity. We know well how inquisitive she can be.”
Pressing her lips together, she paced the length of the room, ruminating over the best strategy to keep everyone hidden.
Safe.
“What if he discovers you?” Her maid’s brows gathered in worry.
“We will stay out of sight until Lord Spencer is sent home,” Charlotte reassured.
Her eyes locked with her maid’s wide brown eyes.
“He may have questions, but you will ease his mind. To maintain that it is only servants residing here, you will ensure he is kept to his room. He mustn’t be allowed to wander. ”
With a resigned nod, Aamina tilted her mouth up to the side. “The laudanum should help.”
Stroking her chin, Charlotte gave her a pointed look. “I will move to a different room until he is well enough to depart. You keep him well-dosed with medication if he needs it. For his recovery, of course. Rest is the best medicine. We will do as the doctor has ordered.”
Aamina quirked a brow. “I will ensure he is very well rested. Once he is well enough to move about, we will send him to Bodmin and the secret will be safe.”
They shared a conspiratorial smile. Charlotte pinched the bridge of her nose and nodded. All would be well, as long as they kept to their plan.
* * *
Blessedly dreary weather forced them to stay indoors. It made keeping Aurelia contained far easier. If they were to venture outside, they might be more easily discovered by Perry.
A hard rain drummed against the windows, and they enjoyed a quiet morning in the library with her favorite gardening tomes.
Even though it seemed a crime, Charlotte loved to annotate her gardening journals.
Underlining important passages and leaving small tabs of paper to help her come back to the articles of significance.
She was quite scientific about her gardening and loved gathering information about which plants could benefit from being planted close to each other and which would keep the rabbits away from her more delectable varieties of flowers.
The notes were kept organized so they could easily be shared with her daughter.
Aurelia spent some time with her in the library, where they sat on the sofa and read through the latest pile of books her parents had sent for their granddaughter.
Aurelia was captivated by the stories and begged her to continue reading far past the time they usually sat to have their luncheon.
Charlotte looked forward to reading each book with her daughter, treasuring every moment they spent together.
Charlotte had been blessed with a child who brimmed with enthusiasm for novel situations and brought much excitement to what would otherwise have been a dull life of isolation.
Those were the moments she was most thankful for the decisions that had brought her to this point in her life.
Aurelia was a child born of love. Though that love hadn’t survived more than one magical summer, Charlotte was convinced it gave Aurelia a special ability to love deeper and in a more uninhibited manner than one born from a serious, less affectionate coupling.
A pang of guilt flashed through her as she considered the implications of Perry’s awakening.
Would he discover her? How could she prevent him from discovering all the secrets the Townsends had hidden away in the country at Fermoy?
If he were awake, he would be well enough to travel to his estate soon.
They would have to be extremely careful.
Bring the doctor in to declare him well enough to travel to precipitate matters.
With a heavy sigh, she watched Aurelia, sitting on the floor in her white muslin gown, a book in her lap.
Her daughter was more precious to her than anything.
Perry’s recovery was good news, yes.
But it was concerning as well. They would have to be more vigilant.
Keep Aurelia in her rooms for a few days until Lord Spencer could be moved safely to his estate.
Of course, it bothered her a little that he would never know his daughter. There were reasons why decisions had been made in the past and it was too late to change them. Nothing could erase the fact that he was married to another.
Charlotte wasn’t a fool. She had overheard clever ways she could fake the state of her virginity for her future husband.
The old man could be easily deceived with a small cut swiped along her thighs.
There had been a plan for that. There had not, however, been a plan for becoming with child, besides passing the baby off as the viscount’s.
The idea sickened her deeply at the time.
A beautiful child, born of a tender love, passed off as the offspring of such a horrid man.
A shiver passed through her at the thought.
In the end, the decision was easy.
Whilst she lay in the country, fighting for her life through a lingering illness, her betrothed had grown impatient.
Infuriated by the delay in their marriage plans, he had broken the engagement in favor of a woman who was more readily available.
And in better health. Though the image of the viscount rutting her like a beast left a sour taste in her mouth, when Lord Dewberry left her, Charlotte was well and truly ruined.
A broken engagement, a slow recuperation from sickness, and the realization that she had missed her monthly courses.
Hopelessness filled her memories. That woman was desperate and utterly abandoned. Frightened to the very core.
There were few solutions at her disposal.
Upon learning of her condition, her father approached the Duke of Bridgewater, horrified at her ruin.
But the die had already been cast. The much-anticipated marriage between Peregrine Spencer and Eliza Hood had taken place, though she had missed the details of the event during her prolonged illness.
Their only consolation had been a petty offering by the elder duke.
A sum of money to keep the Spencer child a secret, even from their father.
The funds were enough to keep Charlotte and Aurelia comfortable for the rest of their days.
Her father begged her to take it and be free.
They would maintain the ruse of her illness until the whispers of the ton quieted completely.
She was forgotten. As good as dead. In a way, she was free.
Her only concession was to never return to London.
The duke told them to make no other contact, unless the child was a boy.
A baby girl had absolutely no value to him.
It was a cruel fate to have to live through the pregnancy, the birth, and the emotions of having a child, all on her own.
Her family visited and supported her as best they could, of course.
Once the direness of the situation was clear, they elected to keep her hidden where she would be most comfortable.
A familiar place where they knew she could stay for a long time.
A remote location that kept her out of sight.
Only Aamina could be trusted to stay with her at Fermoy, along with the loyal servants that already resided at the estate.
Some servants would have abandoned her, knowing the truth of how far she had fallen.
Aamina stood by her with steadfast determination when given the choice, helping lift her mood when possible, and holding her hand during childbirth.
To Charlotte, she was more than a servant; she was a friend.
She hoped to one day be able to repay the generosity with which Aamina had given her support and friendship.
After having Aurelia, the heavy burden of loneliness cut deep.
Regardless of the kindness and love from her family, she was alone and confused with warring feelings of overwhelming joy for having known her daughter and deep shame for having ruined what might have been a very different future. One she would never know.
Each time she stared out the window into the distance, she would wonder if he would come for her. If, perhaps he would leave his wife and follow his heart. A lone rider arriving at the estate, frantic to be reunited with his true love. It was a fantasy, of course.
Charlotte shook her head. Such hope was a meal only great fools could indulge in.
After several years of waiting and longing, she had accepted her fate.
She was not the first woman to care more for a man than he did her.
He would not come to rescue them. She cared little about her ruin or the scandal.
The most injury came from missing his love and the great hollow in her chest losing his friendship had left.
Resolute as much as she was lovelorn, Charlotte filled the emptiness the only way she could.
Growing her confidence as she nurtured her independence, she shared moments with her beloved child, spent long days in the garden and tended to estate matters.
There would always be work to do on the estate and many ways to be useful.
Her father bemoaned her skills being wasted on such an isolated estate, but Charlotte accepted her fate. After almost a decade caring for Fermoy, she was comfortable with her life and resigned to live the most fulfilling existence she could, away from society.
Perry’s arrival had destroyed the peace she had achieved. Trained to deny her existence on the estate, the servants would be of no help to him. It was for the best to stay hidden. Forgotten. Keep her presence a secret and protect the simple life they reveled in at Fermoy.
If he discovered her, Peregrine might start making demands.
She would not bow down to her fate as her younger self had.
She was determined to choose her own path.
Should he realize Aurelia existed, he might cast Charlotte aside and take the child to live in the city.
She would have no means to fight his power.
As a ruined woman, she had no weapons against his powerful family.
Though it made sense to give Aurelia the best life she deserved, the cost seemed too high.
In her vision, Charlotte would use a portion of the money they had received from the elder duke as a dowry to help secure Aurelia a marriage in the future.
A sum that would help any suitor forget the mystery surrounding her daughter’s lineage.
Perhaps they would even introduce her as a distant cousin.
Charlotte had a solution for everything, except having her daughter taken from her.
Selfishly, Charlotte feared losing her child and loathed the thought of another woman raising Aurelia. His proper wife.
Closing her eyes, Charlotte inhaled a calming breath.
No.
She refused to let it happen.
The servants would help her.
They must continue to keep the secret until Peregrine left. It was the only way to keep her life as it was.
Safe.
Alone, yet in control of her own destiny.