Chapter 14
Chapter Fourteen
Relieved of the grogginess fogging up his mind, Perry saw everything more clearly.
Of course, he revealed none of his thoughts to the servants bustling around the room and feeding him.
Well-managed servants could be the effects of a trustworthy housekeeper, of course, but the way they seemed confident in their movements and routines was suspect.
This wasn’t a few servants tending to an empty home.
They changed the bedding and offered to help him use the chamber pot, to which he drew the line.
He was strong enough to manage himself. His arm throbbed, and he gritted his teeth as he adjusted himself back into the bed.
The doctor had given him a full inspection and was encouraged by the healing progress beneath the freshly replaced bandage.
The older man’s pleased hums and pokes caused Perry to hiss a breath through his clenched teeth in pain.
In a few more days, the doctor believed Perry would be well enough to travel away from Fermoy, if he so desired.
He was eager to leave this place, which evoked so many memories and stoked a familiar longing that had been banked for so long. It was making him unwell.
Obsessive almost.
He surveyed the empty room, quiet now that the servants had left him to rest. At least, that was why he had requested privacy. He needed a moment to gather his thoughts and make sense of these feelings swirling in his mind.
For reasons that escaped him, he had been shot by a mysterious blackguard that had been lurking in the shadows waiting for him—or perhaps it was a rogue bullet from a hunting rifle.
Leaning his head against the fresh linens, he was struck by how helpless he was.
He hadn’t kept his weapons on him and had been caught unguarded.
The sooner he left this bed, the faster he could investigate who had fired that bullet.
Had someone wanted to kill him? The idea was inconceivable, and yet, here he was, lying in bed recovering after being the target of a bullet.
Curling his fists into the sheets, he grunted with the pain.
It reminded him that his body wasn’t completely healed.
His vulnerability was humbling. At the mercy of all the servants living at Fermoy, he was pampered and coddled like a child. Safe, but struggling.
Plagued with dreams and so many memories he hadn’t touched for so long.
Parts of him ached, not from the bullet, but from a wound that had been freshly torn open when he awoke at Fermoy. The pain highlighted the depth of the sorrow that clung to his very bones. Unresolved feelings, questions that had never been answered.
Losing Charlotte had been painful, but his inability to find her, to say goodbye, to caress her skin one last time, tore through him. He had moved on—at least he thought he had. Truly.
For some precious moments, other women, alcohol, and travel with friends had helped numb the pain. Forget it, even.
Perry realized what a fool he had been. Being at Fermoy reminded him of those better days, evoked the memory of a tender touch he missed, and a sweet voice he believed silenced forever.
Had it truly been silenced?
Or had he—and all of society—been duped?
Tucked away in his luxurious bed for the last few days, with the laudanum keeping him quiet and mindless, he healed. Now, his legs pulsated with restless energy as his mind examined all the possibilities.
The woman caring for him in the night. The reverent touch across his brow. The familiar scent of gardenias haunted his feverish dreams. It was an impossibility that was somehow—possible.
Waiting for the truth to be revealed was not something Perry was willing to do. He was hungry for answers. On the verge of leaving this estate for the comforts of his own, he needed to know. To be certain.
A fire that had dulled to an indiscernible flicker of light within him was stoked into a raging blaze. Curiosity laced with anger. Had Charlotte been hiding here all these years?
How could she have been kept away for so long? If she was unwell—or at death’s door—as her father had told Perry, why was she tending to him in his moment of weakness? His breathing quickened as rage fed his spiraling thoughts.
No one lives here but us servants.
The servants were protecting a secret or…a person. Resigned to satisfy his curiosity, Perry pushed himself up in bed, turning to bring his legs to brace themselves on the floor. Once standing, he took a few careful steps around the room to ensure his stability.
Grateful for a thick, lined robe the servants had found for him, he secured the tie around his waist to cover his nightshirt and stepped toward the door.
His anger propelled him to discover the secret Fermoy was harboring.
Perhaps it was nothing, but he would carefully search each room for signs of her, if only to quell his madness.
Turning the knob silently, he held his breath, peering into the empty hallway.
With a relieved exhale, he stepped into the unfamiliar space, determined to search as many rooms as possible with his limited energy reserves.
Casting a glance to situate himself for his return to the room, he stepped quietly into the room across the hall.
Had this estate truly been waiting for the baron and baroness to return, he expected the rooms to have covered furniture and possibly, a fine layer of dust, depending on how often the servants inspected the unoccupied rooms.
With foolish bravery quietly humming in his chest, he opened the door to the bedroom closest to the one where he convalesced.
A wall of scent hit him, dizzying him in its familiarity.
Closing his eyes, he inhaled the delicate fragrance of gardenias blended with a perfume that was entirely Charlotte. His Lottie.
Could this be the touch of a ghost, whispering over his skin?
A shiver ran down his spine.
Cataloging the various bottles left on the vanity, the robe hanging on the door of the dressing room, the stack of books sitting by the bed, waiting patiently to be read, he noted how the space looked more like an unfinished sentence.
As though the woman who belonged in it had left and would return imminently.
This was not a room with covers protecting the furniture.
It was lived in. The air was not stale and damp as were rooms that were left closed for great lengths of time.
The trail of Lottie’s perfume was fresh, as though she had recently been there.
A thrill shot through him as the evidence confirmed his suspicions. Could another woman be residing at Fermoy who used a similar fragrance to his Lottie? Certainly. Perry would not rest until he uncovered the truth.
Exiting the bedroom, he made his way through the long hallway, checking each room as he passed.
Some were locked, some had covered furniture, indicating their lack of use.
Stopping to lean against the wall decorated with a delicate pink floral wallpaper, Perry took a moment to catch his breath.
His energy was waning. Cursing his weakness, he tried to conceive of which room would be the most likely where he would find her.
He remembered how much she loved the sunny library from when she spoke fondly of it to him so many years ago.
If she was not outdoors, she was researching, diving into the latest botanical journals and pamphlets.
Bracing himself against the wall with his good hand, he moved silently with the intention of hiding in the open rooms if a servant came upon him.
At least they hadn’t lied about the estate being inhabited by few people.
With tremendous luck, the stairs were empty of any signs of life as he drifted as quietly as a shadow.
Anticipation hummed in his chest as he guessed the best direction in which to walk to find the library.
He prayed that his selection would be correct.
There would be very little time to search before someone detected his presence.
He stopped for another rest, pressing his palm to the wall for balance. There wasn’t time to hesitate, if he waited too long, he would be caught.
The beat of relentless determination thrummed in his veins. He would chase her down every corner of the impressive home until she was caught. If his Lottie happened to be hiding at Fermoy, where their love story first began, he would lose whatever sanity remained within him.
Gripping the polished railing, he moved as quickly as he could down the luxurious staircase. Making a rapid decision, he crept down the mysterious, darkened hallway.
He paused to listen for signs of servants that might happen upon him.
Off in the distance, a soft voice could be heard. Following the voice, he let it guide his footsteps. Panic washed over him as it grew closer.
Mrs. Higgins.
Flattening himself inside a doorway, he closed his eyes and held his breath as the woman emerged from a room down the hall and scurried toward another area of the house. In her haste, Mrs. Higgins didn’t notice him. Perry exhaled slowly as she disappeared from view.
Perry’s heart hammered in his chest. There wasn’t much time.
Had he been discovered missing? Were they going to send all the servants out to search for him at any moment?
Keeping a sharp eye watching for movement of any kind, he moved along the hallway, determined not to waste any time.
Fear would not deter him. Not when he was so close to discovering the truth.
Was he truly ready to see his Lottie again?
Running his hand through his hair, he realized he must look a fright, but these were only distractions.
He needed to know the truth. Unafraid, he walked in the direction of the room that Mrs. Higgins had recently exited.
If the servant was speaking to someone, Perry would discover who that other person was.
His anger melted into something softer, and deeper, more painful as he moved toward the room. Rows and rows of books told him he had arrived at his destination.
Peering into the room, he took in the mysterious woman seated with her back to him.
With golden-brown hair carefully swept into a knot at the base of her neck, the woman leaned her head to the side as she read what he assumed was a book sitting in her lap.
He would know that hair anywhere. The color of warm toffee. Silky to the touch and irresistible.
Drawn to her, he entered the room on silent steps. The woman released a soft sigh, her head perking up just as Perry’s slipper brushed against the carpet.
Perry watched, rapt. His body was flooded with a mixture of confusion and relief.
She twirled an escaped curl around her finger. “Did you forget something, Mrs. Higgins?” Her light tone gave no indication that she knew he was in the room.
Turning her head, a tender smile turned to a gasp as her brown eyes locked with his.
Though he wanted to smile for having found his prey, there was no laughter in his throat.
Only the deepest despair choking his voice into silence.
A hunger coming to life that had been suppressed for so long, he had no idea it even lingered there.
Covering her mouth with her hand, Lottie’s eyes widened with shock.
A sheen of tears gathered in his eyes as his mind battled between needing to kiss her and wanting to shake her. “I’ve caught you.”
The ghost would not escape him now.