Chapter 21
MOLLY
I can’t believe we are locked in. I mean seriously, what if there was a fire or something?
I suppose considering the whole front wall of the lobby is glass we would be able to get out easily enough in an emergency, but that’s hardly the point, A strange, trapped sensation curls around my ribs, squeezing the breath from my lungs.
I need to get out of here. I need to get home to Autumn.
I nod stiffly and follow Joshua back toward the elevators.
It’s not like there’s anything else I can do.
I won’t achieve anything just sitting in the lobby.
My legs feel weak, but I keep moving. My mind is already racing ahead—how late is it?
Will my mom be okay with Autumn staying overnight?
Obviously, she’s not going to throw her out into the street, but if she thinks I’m taking advantage of her, she might refuse to babysit at all and then I’m stuck.
The elevator doors open and we get in and Joshua presses the button for the seventh floor.
The elevator hums as it carries us back up to the office floor.
This ride is very different from the one going down.
On the way down, all I could think about was my proximity to Joshua.
Now all I can think about is Autumn. The elevator pings, announcing its arrival on the seventh floor and the moment the doors slide open, I check my cell phone and see the signal bars flicker back onto my screen.
Joshua is doing the same thing as we step out of the elevator.
"Cell reception is back. I’ll call the building superintendent," Joshua says, already tapping through his contacts.
"Ok," I say quickly, turning on my heel and hurrying toward the bathroom before he can ask me anything.
The second I push through the door to the bathroom my attention is on my cell phone. I go to my recent calls and find my mom’s name. I press it and then I press my phone to my ear and pace as I wait for my mom to pick up.
"Hey, sweetheart," she says when she answers. She doesn’t sound pissed off, but I haven’t dropped the big bombshell on her yet.
"Mom," I whisper, gripping the edge of the sink. "I can’t get out of the office. The doors are locked, and I don’t know how long it’ll take to get someone down here to let us out."
"Molly, breathe,” my mom says. Her voice is gentle but firm. "It’s fine. Autumn is already asleep. If you don’t get out until morning, it’s no big deal."
"I …" I start and then I stop, squeezing my eyes shut. My daughter is safe. My mom is with her. And she is perfectly fine about it. I need to calm down. "Are you sure it’s ok?"
"Yes, I’m sure. Now stop panicking."
That’s easier said than done for an overthinker, but I appreciate the sentiment.
I rub my forehead, exhaling slowly.
"Okay. I just … I hate not being there."
"I know you do. But you will be tomorrow. Just get through tonight."
I nod, even though she can’t see me.
"Ok. Thanks, Mom."
"Love you, sweetheart."
"Love you too."
I end the call and take a moment to breathe and then I stare at my reflection in the mirror. My cheeks are flushed, and my eyes are still open a little bit too wide, but at least I’m breathing normally again.
Get through tonight. That’s all I have to do. I can do that. I’m locked in my work building and Autumn is fine with my mom. There’s no disaster here.
Squaring my shoulders, I push open the door and walk out of the bathroom and head back toward Joshua’s office. He’s leaning against his desk, his cell phone still in his hand.
"The super is on his way," he tells me.
"Ok, That’s good." I say. I’m once more very aware of the fact we are alone together, and I get all awkward, unsure of what to do next.
Work is a safe topic, and it’ll also give me something to do with my hands which suddenly feel like they aren’t a part of my body, and I don’t know where to put them.
"Is there anything else to work on while we wait? "
Joshua watches me for a beat, then a slow smirk tugs at his lips.
"I think we’ve done enough for tonight, don’t you?" he says.
Before I can think of a response, he moves toward the cabinet against the far wall, opens it, and pulls out a bottle of amber liquid and two short glasses.
I’m pleased he doesn’t seem to actually want an answer to his question.
I mean what do I say? Yes makes it sound like I’m saying I’m done with this and no sounds like I’m brown nosing at best.
"Scotch?" Joshua says, smiling and showing me the bottle.
I hesitate. Drinking with my boss in the middle of the night in an empty office building?
It’s probably not the best idea, especially considering what happened last time we drank together.
I’m kind of worried that a couple of drinks in I will be asking him why he forgot me.
But I also feel raw, my nerves still stretched thin from the panic, and the idea of something warm and numbing is more appealing than I’d like to admit.
Ah fuck it. I can have one without risking saying too much.
"Sure, thanks," I say quietly, stepping forward as he pours the drinks.
He hands me a glass and lifts his own.
"To surviving an unexpected lock in," he says.
I huff a small laugh.
"To surviving," I repeat, and we both take a drink.
The first sip burns my throat and then all the way down to my tummy, but after a second, it becomes a pleasant kind of heat, warming me from the inside out.
Joshua watches me over the rim of his glass, and something about the way his eyes move over my face makes my skin tingle.
He really is handsome. If anything, he’s better looking than he was three years ago.
“Let’s sit,” Joshua says, and I follow him across his office to a small seating area consisting of a leather couch, two leather chairs and a low coffee table. I sit down on one end of the couch and Joshua sits on the other end. He turns slightly so he is facing me, and I do the same.
"So," he says, his eyes still on my face. "Why did you look like you were going to pass out when we realized we were locked in?"
My breath catches. I can’t tell him it’s because of my daughter.
He might ask how old she is and then he will put the pieces together and resent us.
But what can I say that doesn’t make me look like a weirdo?
Ahh. He’s still watching me, and I can almost feel the seconds passing by.
I need to think of something, and I need to be fast about it.
"I just don’t like feeling trapped," I say finally. It’s hardly an inspired thought, but it’s reasonable and pretty run of the mill.
It’s not exactly a lie, but it’s not the truth either.
His gaze lingers on my eyes then my mouth, like he’s weighing up whether or not to believe me, but then he takes another sip of his drink and lets it go.
I’m not sure whether he actually believes me or whether he has just decided it’s a bit too personal to push an employee into saying more.
"Fair enough," he says, ending the conversation.
He leans back against the arm of the couch behind him, looking far too relaxed for how fast my heart is beating. As we study each other’s faces. The air between us is charged and I’m sure I’m not the only one who can feel it. It is almost alive with need and lust.
I drain the rest of my drink and set the empty glass down on the coffee table with a quiet clink, trying to act normal.
Joshua watches me, then he pushes himself off the arm of the couch and he too empties his drink and puts his glass down and then he shuffles closer to me, closing the gap between us.
He has one leg up on the couch, bent at the knee and his shin is suddenly touching my thigh and God the touch of him is driving me crazy.
"You know," he says, his voice lower now. "I think you underestimate yourself."
I swallow loudly.
"What do you mean?" I say, barely making any sound.
"You’re always so worried about making mistakes, but you’re good at what you do, Molly. Better than you give yourself credit for."
I blink up at him, thrown by the sincerity in his voice. I’m about to tell him it’s just something I do but that I’m working on giving myself a break.
"I …" I start, but whatever I was about to say disappears from my mind and my mouth leaving me speechless and breathless when he reaches out, his fingers brushing a stray curl away from my cheek. My breath catches, and I’m even more aware of how the air between us is so charged, humming with something I don’t know how to name.
"Joshua," I say, about to tell him that nothing can happen between us.
I realize it’s the first time I’ve used his first name since starting work here, and it should probably feel weird or awkward, but it feels natural and it occurs to me that actually, calling him Mr Redfern is more awkward.
It also feels more intimate though which is the opposite to what I was going for.
I try to gather my thoughts, but it’s hard with Joshua so close to me, his eyes locked on mine, and before I can think of anything to say or do, before I can remind myself of all the reasons why this is a bad idea, his mouth is on mine, and I know right then I’ve lost the battle.
Joshua’s kiss is slow and deliberate, like he’s testing the waters, waiting to see if I will pull away from him. But I don’t. I can’t.
Heat floods through me, my fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt as he deepens the kiss, his other hand slipping to my waist. His touch is firm, steady, grounding me in the moment. And just like last time, his kiss awakens a hunger inside of me, a hunger that must be fed or I will go crazy.
When we finally break apart, my lips feel swollen, and my breath is uneven. Joshua’s eyes are darker now, locked onto mine, searching. I should say something. I should move back a bit. But I don’t.
Instead, I stay exactly where I am, waiting to see what happens next.