Chapter 5 #2
She laughed, scooping him up despite his growing size. “Percy! You've shot up like a weed. You’ll be taller than your papa soon.”
“Will not!” Percy wriggled, grinning. “Papa says I’m to be a duke someday, just like him.”
Dominic stepped in behind, his tall frame filling the doorway, and his dark eyes crinkled with warmth.
Deena hadn’t seen him for months. She smiled at him as she remembered their last visit six months ago just before little Mary fell ill and could not travel again.
Everyone waited on bated breath for her recovery and Deen had never prayed so much in her life.
But Mary was a fighter. At just two years old, she was already showing signs of her father’s stubbornness. Percy, on the other hand, was five and adventurous, kind and friendly like Selina and his late mother.
“You finally decided to return to London,” Dominic said with a cocky smile.
“Not without Grandmother’s motivation.” Deena and Dominic laughed and her heart felt lighter in his presence.
When Dominic and his wife began trying to convince her to return to London, Deena receded into a shell and cut them off.
“Thank God for the dowager!” Just as she thought about Selina, she sauntered into the room, cradling little Mary who immediately stretched out her pudgy arms towards Deena.
She remembers me.
“Oh! It really is so good to see you all again!” Deena felt her eyes burn with tears.
She reluctantly set Percy down, who ran to his father and immediately took Mary, nuzzling her niece’s soft cheek. The toddler giggled in her arms. She smelled of milk and lavender, her dark curls tickling Deena’s nose, and she looked as healthy as ever.
She is growing up too fast, and I am missing it.
“How are you, sweetling?” She cooed.
“I’m good,” she replied in a small, sweet voice that made Deena’s heart clench.
Dominic enveloped Deena and Mary in a hug, causing the child to kick and giggle again. “It’s good to see you, Dee.”
“It’s good to see you too, Dom,” she gasped as the hug got tighter and the weight of Mary grew heavier in her arms, but she clung stalwartly, inhaling Dominic’s familiar scent of cedar and…fresh hay? “Dom, have you been in the stables a lot or have you become a farmer?”
He released her, holding her at arm’s length with a rare grin plastered on his face.
“Little Percy is learning how to ride, and I wanted to teach him personally,” he said proudly.
Deena was in awe of the man he was becoming. Selina nudged her husband aside and hugged her next, it was a warm, and genuine hug that she truly needed.
“We’re so glad you’re home. Mary and Percy need their Aunt Dee.”
Mary patted Deena’s freckled cheek, and Deena bounced her gently. “I’ll always be here for my babies.”
“How was Paris the last couple of months, Dee?” Dominic asked, and Deena noticed the guilt in his voice.
“It was great,” she lied.
“And how is your friend? Lady Pamela, if I’m not mistaken?” Selina asked apologetically.
“Her name is Lady Penelope.” A sense of dread washed over her. Deena choked on her words, cleared her throat, and smiled. “And she’s…doing quite well. Thank you, Selina.”
“Ah, yes, she is the daughter of the Marquess of Ravenshire?” Dominic asked as Percy ran circles around him.
“Yes, she is.” Deena’s mouth felt suddenly dry.
“Isn’t she unmarried as well? She should’ve joined you in this season’s Hunt!” Selina said brightly.
“She would have loved to join us, but she has…responsibilities to see to in Paris.” It was not a lie, but it was not truthful either.
When Deena moved to Paris, she was prepared to be alone and had no intention of making friends.
That was until Penelope bumped into her at a local cathedral.
Penelope stayed at a nearby convent with the nosiest nuns and Deena was not too far from her.
The girls bonded quickly over their shared loneliness and exile.
So much so that even their battles became one.
Percy tugged Deena’s skirt and pulled her from her thoughts.
“Did anyone tease you? Grandmama said some lady’s whisper. I’ll punch ‘em!”
Deena ruffled his hair. “No one’s teasing, brave knight. Everyone’s been kind.”
But her brother’s gaze sharpened. Dom always knew when she was lying.
“Truthfully? If anyone’s given you grief, just say the word, and I’ll set them straight.” Dominic raised a brow at her, and Percy mimicked him.
“No, truly.” Guilt twisted in her gut. The whispers at breakfast and Lady Ann’s comments paled beside the secrets she carried. She blinked, refocusing on Dominic’s concerned face. “I’m fine. I promise.”
“Let me take her off your hands. She is falling asleep already.” Selina took Mary from Deena and settled her on the bed with a toy horse. “Have you come back for good? No more exile?” she asked expectantly.
Deena hesitated, sitting softly beside the child. “I’m... here now. Grandmother insisted.”
“But do you want to stay?” Dominic pressed. “Greystone’s your home. And always will be.”
Percy climbed up, wedging between them. “Stay forever! We can ride together. Papa says you used to beat him racing to the old oak.”
Deena smiled faintly. “Cheating helped. Your papa never noticed the shortcuts.”
Dominic chuckled. “You had that devil pony.”
Selina watched them lovingly. “And have you considered marriage? Grandmother’s Duke Hunt must be a whirlwind. Any gentlemen catching your eye?”
Heat crept up Deena’s neck. “No. I’m not looking for a husband.”
Dominic frowned. “Still?”
“I don't fit here anymore,” Deena said quietly, her voice thickening with emotion. “The ton’s rules, the stares... Paris gave me independence, books, and my studies. But here, I’m just the scandalous sister again.”
Percy frowned. “What’s scandalous?”
“Nothing for little ears,” Selina said quickly, then chuckled softly. “Deena, I felt the same. I felt like an outsider. And your brother, who was titled the Stone Duke back then, was completely cold and unyielding.”
“Thank you, Selina,” Dom said dryly.
“Everyone in the ton whispered that I’d never thaw him.”
Dominic pulled Selina close, kissing her temple. “You melted me in days.”
Selina leaned into him. “I wish it were days! But I was terrified. I didn't belong, and I thought I’d never have any of this.” She gestured to Percy and Mary. “A real family. And a love that feels... safe.”
Deena’s throat tightened. They were so perfect. Deena loved this transformation. But deep down, fear clawed. They made marriage seem nice, and Deena briefly wondered if she could have what they have.
Why couldn’t I? Why shouldn’t I?
“You truly changed everything,” Deena murmured. “It’s... beautiful.”
Selina squeezed her hand. “It can be yours too. The right man doesn’t care about fitting in. He makes the world fit you.”
Dominic nodded. “Whoever he is, he’ll be lucky. You’re fierce, Deena. And as stubborn as me.”
“Not that stubborn,” Selina teased.
Percy yawned dramatically. “Can we go riding now? Please?”
“Pwease!” Mary echoed.
Deena smiled brightly. “After the Duke Hunt, I’ll trounce you all.”
Dominic grinned. “Challenge accepted.”
Selina gathered Mary. “We’ll see you on the lawn. Don’t let Grandmother pair you with anyone dreadful.”
As they filed out, Dominic lingered, hugging her once more. “I’m proud of you for coming back. I love you, Dee.”
“I love you too, Dom.” Despite the past, she deeply missed her brother, and she adored the man he had become when he met Selina.
He squeezed her hand, and the door clicked shut behind them. Deena sank onto the bed, exhaling shakily. To say she was overwhelmed didn’t cover it. The joy of their welcome clashed with guilt over her secrets. And their visits always left her aching and yearning for what they had.
She pictured Austin again, unbidden: him kneeling before her in his room, breath hot on her skin, whispering sweet nothings to her.
But as she rose to begin her day, the loneliness returned along with her reality.