Chapter Twenty-Six
They rode through the night, heading westwards along the banks of the River Clut.
They had been forced to stop briefly early on to fashion a sling for the cubs when it proved impossible to ride as fast as Arne wanted to while carrying the basket.
Now, Gemma had them tied against her chest, while Arne kept the sleeping boy in front of him.
It was low tide as they approached Loch Garw, so they crossed it at the spit which led to Nevyth.
Knowing they were so close to Kirkjaster filled her not only with a sense of relief but also something she had never expected to feel – a sense of coming home.
Arne slowed his horse to a walk as they made their way up the side of the stream to where the abandoned church building lay. “Maybe we should stay here for the rest of the night.”
“Don’t you want to get home?”
Arne took a deep breath and held it for a moment. Then he swallowed and stared up the road to Kirkjaster. “Once we’re there… After I’ve spoken to Tormod, told him about Einar, it might not be home for either of us. I don’t think I can face having to go any further without resting.”
“You really think he’ll want you to leave?”
Arne sighed and her heart hurt for him. He’d kept his secret for all this time, and now he would have not just a secret to confess but also his reasons for keeping it. And it wasn’t just Tormod’s reaction that mattered, it was Einar’s.
“Whatever happens, at least we’re together.”
“I don’t want to ever be apart from you again,” he said. “I should never have left you there.”
She hadn’t known what would happen when she saw him again, if she saw him again, but as soon as she had, she knew she would do everything she could to make sure she stayed by his side this time.
He was the only man who had ever been so honest about wanting her, not for her status or the heirs she could provide, but simply because he wanted her.
But she wouldn’t let him feel guilty about what had happened, about the choice she’d made to return to Perthawc.
“I should have been safe with my family,” she said.
They looked at each other and grimaced.
“And if I hadn’t gone back, I’d always have wondered if I had done the right thing for Caelin.”
“And now you know?”
“Now I know.”
They followed the burn until they reached the church. She shivered as she looked at it, dark and cold in the moonlight.
“I don’t want to stay here,” she said. “We should keep going. There’s no point delaying the inevitable.”
“No.” Arne sighed again. “Whatever happens, whatever Tormod decides, we will live with it.”
She frowned at him. “I won’t let him part us.”
He jerked his head back to look at her. “No. No, that’s not an option. I only meant…” He ran a hand over his face. “If Tormod forgives me, then we will remain here. If he does not, then the four of us will leave. Together.”
She nodded and smiled, happiness pooling inside her – happiness that couldn’t be altered by Tormod’s decision. Either in Kirkjaster, or in the north, she and Arne would make a life for themselves. Together.
The horses walked on quietly for a while and they reached the crest of the hill.
Even in the darkness she could see the edge of the land curving around and the light of some fires still burning in the houses in Kirkjaster.
When they reached the outskirts of the village, they slowed the horses and stopped.
She prayed Tormod and Einar would accept what Arne had to say, although they may still have to leave.
Her presence here, Caelin’s presence here, was now as much of a risk as Arne had worried it might be in the past.
“What will Tormod say about… us?” she asked.
“I hope he will wish us well.”
She looked down at her hands. “What if he… those men… the ones who told Rhun about us. They just… they made it sound so sordid. What happened between us.”
“But it wasn’t. We know the truth, and nothing else matters. Once we speak to Tormod, everything will change.”
“It’s time for it all to change, Arne. More than time. Your son needs to know who his father is. Tormod needs to know the truth and go on with his life knowing the truth. And we’ll move on if necessary. Go north. To the new lands of Thule. Start again. So long as we are together,” Gemma said.
“I love you,” Arne said, reaching towards her. She urged her mount to sidle closer and interlaced her fingers with his. “Marry me? No matter what happens here?”
“I will,” she promised.
For this moment, in the quiet of the night, it seemed as if they were the only people around, free to choose their own futures. And no matter what lay ahead of them, they would face it together.