Chapter 27
The drive to Jamie’s childhood home was usually relaxing. Usually. Today, rain hammered the windshield, and traffic slowed to a crawl thanks to a wreck up ahead. Caleb thought British people would be used to driving in the rain, but… apparently not.
“I still think it would be completely professional if you sent an email, at the very least,” Jamie said sternly. “I drafted one to Halcombe. I’ll show you when we get there…”
Caleb exhaled slowly, tightening his fingers around the steering wheel.
It had been almost two weeks since Halcombe told Caleb that he was a “bad influence” on Nate, and, apparently, Jamie and Sally were still furious about it.
He understood their anger about it—truly, it was bullshit—but, at this point, Caleb just wanted to let it die.
The season was nearly over, and he wanted to get to summer camp without blowing everything up.
He kept his eyes on the road. “Jamie, sweetheart, I know you mean well, but I already told you I’m not saying anything.”
“Why not?” Jamie dropped his phone into his lap, frustrated. “You can’t just let this arsehole go around being a homophobic prick—”
“I know that. I know what he said was wrong. I know he’s a dick. But summer camp’s coming up, and I have to work with him.” He tried to swallow down the anxiety that crawled up his throat. “I just need to get through the next few weeks, alright?”
Jamie reached over and rested a hand on his bicep. “I know the kids’ camp is important to you, Caleb. But is it more important than standing up for yourself?”
Caleb hesitated. “Camp is my only shot at working with the kids.” His gaze flicked to the rain-streaked window, suddenly embarrassed. “And I’ve been thinking about maybe going back to school. It would look good on my resume to… you know, work with kids. If I want to study pediatrics.”
A surprised intake of breath as Jamie’s hand slipped back to his own lap. It was the first time he’d admitted out loud that he’d been considering applying to medical school, and Caleb could practically hear the gears turning in Jamie’s brain.
“Oh,” Jamie said quietly. “So you think if you upset Halcombe, he will pull you from camp? And then you won’t have that for your resume.”
“Maybe.”
“But that’s precisely the problem, isn’t it?” Jamie’s hand returned, this time settling on Caleb’s shoulder. “He’s saying this stuff because he knows he has power over you. It’s…” Jamie huffed, and Caleb wanted to kiss him for caring so much.
“It’s not the same as my dad, J.” A lump rose in Caleb’s throat as he slowed down to turn into Jamie’s childhood neighborhood. “It’s really not.”
Silence filled the car as Jamie stroked the back of Caleb’s neck with gentle fingers.
“I told you I’d protect you, Caleb. And this man is hurting you.
He’s attacking who you are and using it to control you.
” His thumb brushed the skin at Caleb’s collar.
“Will you just read the email? That’s all I’m asking. ”
They pulled into the driveway as the rain eased to a drizzle and the familiar house came into view. The lump in his throat loosened at the sight of Jamie’s childhood home.
As Caleb parked, he let the engine idle for a second. “Fine. I’ll read it.” Kicking himself for putting a damper on Jamie’s birthday celebration, he added, “I promise.”
Before anything else could be said, the front door flew open, and the entire Collins family poured outside, rushing toward the car and effectively ending the conversation.
“Oi!” Benji and Sam slapped Jamie on the shoulder and dragged him into a crushing brotherly hug as a chorus of happy birthday and you’re so old, ya wanker filled the driveway. Through the chaos of rowdy Brits, Jamie caught Caleb’s eye, his expression clearly saying: This conversation isn’t over.
Maggie swooped in next, wrapping Caleb in a hug that smelled like sage and fresh bread. Over her shoulder, his gaze drifted to the window boxes—dead flowers drooping sadly over the brick.
Jamie inherited his black thumb from his mother. The neat row of giant blue recycling bins along the side of the house, however, was proof of something else Jamie got from her: his fierce love for the environment.
Despite the lifeless flowers and the rain-soaked bins, the house itself looked beautifully charming in the drizzle.
From the moment Jamie had brought Caleb here to meet his family, he’d fallen in love with the quaint brick house.
And it hit Caleb then, standing there in the rain, that the last time he’d been here, his life felt like it was ending.
This house had once felt like the safest place in the world—a place he could openly love Jamie.
After the accident, it had felt like a waiting room for loss.
Every visit had carried the debilitating fear that it might be the last time Jamie let him stay.
That Jamie would heal and move on without him.
But now Jamie was laughing, getting crushed in one of Pippa’s bear hugs, curls damp and glasses fogged up by rain.
Caleb let out a slow breath. None of the bullshit with Halcombe, or even his dad, mattered the way this did. If he had Jamie, he could survive the rest.
“Y’alright, Caleb?” Maggie asked softly as she pulled back from the hug. “Things seem to be going a bit better, yeah?”
Her gaze flicked to Jamie and back again. Caleb nodded, blinking away the sting behind his eyes. “Yeah, Maggie. They’re great.”
“Here.” Jamie shoved his phone into Caleb’s hand before he could escape. “Read it.”
Caleb let out a heavy sigh but took it. “Jamie…”
“Ah! You promised.” Jamie pointed his finger sternly. Even with the skeptical look on his face, Caleb’s eyes began scanning the screen, and Jamie couldn’t stop the hopeful smile tugging at his mouth. At least he was actually reading it.
Jamie wasn’t one to put his foot down very often—JB always said he let everyone walk all over him—but it was only because he trusted Caleb. Jamie was happy to follow his lead.
Not today, though. Jamie would be damned if he let some arsehole walk over his man.
As Caleb scrolled, Pippa plopped down beside Jamie and leaned dramatically into his arm. Shifting his weight back, he reached his arm around her shoulder and gave her a squeeze.
“Ya having a good birthday?” she asked.
He lifted his jam tart in a little cheers. “The best, obviously.”
“Well,” she said, drawing out the l, “we have one more surprise for you out back. Actually, Caleb does.”
“Way to keep it a surprise, Pip,” Caleb muttered without looking up from Jamie’s phone. The email was clearly longer than he’d expected. Pippa elbowed Jamie in the ribs and waggled her eyebrows before hopping off the couch when Maggie called her into the kitchen.
Jamie turned back to Caleb, who was now scratching at his stubble.
“So?” he asked, unable to wait another second. “What do you think?”
Caleb looked up slowly.
“It’s really well written, J.” He sounded genuinely impressed. A warm flutter sparked in Jamie’s chest. “Honestly. It’s professional and clear and…” He hesitated.
Jamie’s jaw tightened at the flicker of doubt in his expression. How dare Halcombe make his confident, capable Caleb be so unsure?
“Do you think…” Caleb trailed off, frowning down at the phone. A series of emotions flickered over his handsome face, and Jamie sat back, letting him go through his process. Eventually, his eyes cleared and, as if coming to a decision, he dragged his tongue along his top teeth and gave a small nod.
“Okay. I’ll send it.”
Jamie blinked. “Really?”
“Yeah.” Caleb blew out a breath. “It’s respectful. It’s straightforward. I can stand behind it.”
Relief flooded Jamie so fast he nearly sagged with it.
“Brilliant.” He leaned forward and pulled him rather forcefully into a kiss.
Caleb startled for half a second, then melted, hand coming forward to squeeze Jamie’s waist. The kiss was soft and sweet, and Jamie felt a heady rush of gratitude that he got to do this whenever he wanted.
Pulling back, Jamie grinned. “You send that, and I’ll go help Mum with dinner.” He stood, smoothing down his shirt, then shot Caleb a mischievous look. “And then… I’d quite like my surprise present.”
He rushed through dinner prep and met Caleb in the backyard. where a brand new blue Cannondale Topstone 3, with a basket big enough for Jamie’s briefcase, waited for him. It was officially the best day ever.
“Caleb,” he breathed, staring at the bike. If he could feel his hands, he was certain they’d be shaking. “You…I—these are bloody expensive.” His jaw hung slack as he stared. “Why did—? You can’t just…”
Strong hands slid around Jamie’s waist from behind, pulling him back into Caleb’s solid chest. A soft kiss brushed his neck.
“I can,” Caleb murmured. “And I did.” The low timbre of his voice vibrated his chest in the sexiest way imaginable. Along with a brand new bike and being wrapped in Caleb’s strong arms, Jamie felt like a goddamn king.
However, his entire family was standing right there, so Jamie absolutely refused to get turned on. Refused.
After his brain started working again, he noticed that his favorite canvas tote bag was hanging from the handlebars—the one with the carrot on it.
As if sensing his question, Caleb answered. “Oh, I bought you a bike lock for it, too. So you can ride to work.”
“I… you didn’t have to—”
“Sweetheart.” Caleb’s voice was a low rumble in his ear. He needed to stop immediately. “I’ve been wanting to give this to you for months. Are you happy?”
Jamie spun in his arms and dragged his face down to eye level. “Are you kidding? I’m so fucking happy.” Caleb smiled against his lips as Jamie kissed him.
“Language,” his mum muttered, while Pippa added, “Yeah, who says fuck, am I right?” earning an immediate “Pippa Louise!”
Jamie laughed breathlessly and then found himself staring into Caleb’s brown eyes, chest full and tight. It wasn’t just the bike—though he was absurdly thrilled about it. It was this. His family, his Caleb, all together after everything.
A light breeze lifted his curls into his eyes, and Caleb reached up and brushed them away, a soft, fond smile lifting the corner of his mouth.
God, he loved him. It felt stupidly obvious now. His brain felt dizzy when Caleb looked at him like that. Something inside him had finally clicked together—the part of his mind that had been fighting him, finally linking up to the signals in his body that had been drawn to Caleb the entire time.
Rising onto his toes, he kissed Caleb again. A chorus of exaggerated gagging noises sounded as his family retreated inside, but Caleb didn’t move. His hands slid up Jamie’s back to hold him there.
“Thank you,” Jamie whispered against his mouth.
“Anytime,” Caleb breathed, tugging him closer. His hand slipped lower, settling at Jamie’s back. If they didn’t stop snogging in his mum’s garden, he was absolutely going to get a hard-on in broad daylight. He pulled back instead and just… looked at Caleb.
A crease formed between Caleb’s brows. “Everything okay?”
Heat flooded his cheeks. “Yeah. Yes. More than okay. You are just… nice to look at.” Cringing at his sappy words, he tried to save it. “And the bike… I can’t wait to try it out. Thank you so much.”
Caleb smiled, relieved and a little amused. His eyes slid to the bike and back. “Good. I’m glad you like it. I had to ask the woman at the shop for help. Did you know there are about a hundred types of gravel bikes, all with different—”
“I love you,” Jamie blurted. The words came out louder than intended, and his eyes widened as he realized that he’d practically just shouted something that was supposed to be sweet.
Caleb froze, hands tightening on Jamie’s back. A frown formed between his eyebrows. “You… you—?”
“Love you. Yes. I love you, Caleb.” He squeezed his eyes shut.
“Which I probably should have said ages ago, because I think I’ve loved you for—” He opened them, glanced up at the sky for a moment, and then huffed a shaky laugh.
Now that he’d said it, he felt like an idiot for not saying it sooner.
“All I want is you. For you to be happy, and taken care of, and to know that you’re loved.
In fact, love feels like an incredibly inadequate word for how I really feel.
Because…” He met Caleb’s eye once again.
“Because of course I love you. I don’t think I ever stopped loving you. ”
For a long second, Caleb just stared at him. Sometimes, Caleb was so hard to read, the only truly expressive part of him being his eyes. Right now, they were guarded.
“You don’t…,” Caleb started, then swallowed. “You don’t have to say that because I bought you a bike.”
Jamie snorted. “Don’t be ridiculous.”
Caleb searched his face, probably looking for the uncertainty that had lingered for so many months after the accident.
Shoving away his nerves, Jamie held his gaze, willing himself to stay perfectly still.
He would show him that there was no doubt left to find. “I’m so sorry I didn’t say it sooner.”
Caleb’s hands clenched and unclenched at his waist, still unsure.
Or perhaps, in shock. Which sent a sharp pang of guilt through Jamie for everything he’d put this man through.
But staring at Caleb now, with a drizzle of rain making his brown skin a bit damn, his lips downturned in a disbelieving smile—it all clicked for Jamie.
All of it. And it felt so good to not be so fucking afraid.
He wanted to be his forever. He wanted Caleb to wear a ring that showed the world he was Jamie’s. It felt wrong that there wasn’t one there right now. He wondered if their rings were still in Caleb’s nightstand. Shaking the thoughts from his head, he tried to focus. “Caleb, really, I—”
His words were cut off as Caleb pulled him into a fierce kiss.
“Fuck, J.” Caleb cupped the back of his head. “I love you so much. So, so much.”
Jamie brought both hands to Caleb’s jaw, wanting nothing more than to show him how precious he was. How loved he was. He pulled his mouth away for a moment, resting his head against Caleb, before going right back for more.
They kissed in the garden, whispering their love against each other’s lips, and Jamie realized he didn’t give a fuck if his family saw.