Chapter Forty
LUKE
Twelve Weeks Before the Anniversary Party
‘What do you think?’ He pushes his iPad across the desk so she can see better.
She twists the case to avoid glare from the bright March afternoon sun coming through the office windows and concentrates on the image in the centre of the screen, then flicks through a few more.
‘It’s our tenth anniversary, and tin didn’t seem very sexy, so I did a bit of rooting around on the internet and found this artist who does one-of-a-kind pieces in pewter.
I was blown away, it’s just … ’ How does he say this without sounding disloyal or pathetic?
It’s a point of shame for him that he used to be so good at knowing what Jess wanted, what she’d like, but now he can’t seem to get anything right.
‘This is a bit out there. I suppose I just need a second opinion, and I thought you’d be the perfect person to give it. ’
Hannah smiles at him. ‘Luke … This is stunning! So different. I know I’d love to receive something like this.’
‘But what about Jess? Do you think she’ll like it?’
Hannah studies the images again. ‘I … I think so. Like you say, it’s hard to tell with her sometimes.’
He nods slowly. That’s his problem. And it feels important that he gets this year’s present right. He found last year’s pottery figurine behind the weed killer in the understairs cupboard the other week.
For some reason, it feels as if he and Jess are about to reach a turning point. He doesn’t know how and he doesn’t know why, but there’s been a steady gnawing in his gut that only intensifies as the date of their tenth anniversary grows closer.
‘Hey,’ she says, catching what must be a bleak expression on his face. She comes around the desk and rests a hand on his upper arm. ‘What’s up?’
He lets out a frustrated sigh and runs his hand through his hair, shaking his head. ‘I don’t know. Do you think … do you think I make her happy?’
Hannah pulls back, her hand dropping away. Her face a picture of shock, as if she couldn’t imagine any other reality. ‘Of course! Why wouldn’t you make the person you’re with happy, Luke?’
But she doesn’t feel the gaping distance he feels even when he’s in the same room as Jess. She doesn’t know the feeling that Jess is in a boat floating away from him, and all he can do is stand helplessly on the bank and watch the current take her.
He clears his throat. ‘Ten years is a long time … people grow apart.’
Hannah frowns. ‘But not you and Jess, surely?’
He feels bad he’s said something now. After all, this is Jess’s best friend. But he’s got used to opening up more during his chats with Elena, and now it seems it’s happening with other people too, even if he doesn’t plan on it.
He shakes his head and laughs. ‘Ignore me … It’s just been a busy year, what with my dad retiring from the business and me taking over the reins fully.
And I suppose having a big anniversary coming up has got me thinking back over the years, how things used to be.
But we don’t stay the same, do we? We change. We mature.’
She slings her arm around him and gives him an one-sided, slightly awkward hug. ‘You’re being too tough on yourself, Luke. Honestly.’
He gives her a grateful smile. ‘Thanks, but I suppose that’s why I’m hesitating over this present.’
She moves back around to the other side of the counter and wakes the iPad up to look at the images of the sculpture a second time.
‘Well, I think it’s stunning, and if you’re not a hundred per cent sure, since there seems to be an element of …
personalization … needed, I can help, if you like.
Then you can always blame those bits on me if Jess doesn’t like it! ’
‘Would you? That would be amazing!’
She gives him a cheeky look. ‘What’s a Girl Friday for, if not for moments like this?’
‘You’re sure? I don’t want to impose.’
‘Of course. Actually, I have some things at home that might be perfect for ideas. Shall I bring them in for you to see?’
‘Hmm. Best not. Jess drops in occasionally and, let’s face it, I’m not the best at keeping my desk tidy, especially when it’s busy. I don’t want to give the game away before the big day.’
‘Then pop in for a coffee some time; I’ll show you what I’ve got, and we can have an in-depth planning session.’
‘Okay, thanks. I’ll order it later and then we can get to work.’ He catches sight of the clock on the wall and switches gears. ‘Okay, right … I need to be getting off now. I know it’s a bit early but I’ve got a … meeting … to go to.’
He grabs his iPad and sticks it in his bag and grabs his phone and his wallet, while Hannah heads back outside to her own desk.
‘Meeting … ?’ she says, as he dashes past, one arm in his coat and trying to shrug the other on. ‘I don’t see anything in your diary.’
‘I’ll fill you in another time,’ he yells over his shoulder, even though he knows he may never make good on that promise.
Half an hour later, he spots Elena, waiting for him.
She’s back in the blue armchair again, leaving Luke to his usual seat opposite her.
She’s taken up knitting and has brought some with her to while away the next couple of hours.
He’s not going to say anything, but whatever she’s making …
well, let’s just say he hopes it isn’t a present for him.
He has enough monstrosities that his grandma makes him.
She looks tired. He slumps into the chair opposite her, definitely not feeling as weary as she does, but as if he’s running on five per cent battery, and everything could flicker out at any moment.
‘Life is crap, huh?’ she says, but she’s still smiling, despite everything.
He smiles back at her, genuinely lifted by her presence. ‘Yeah. Life is crap. Sometimes.’
‘Thanks for coming. I appreciate it.’
He shrugs. ‘No problem. It’s what friends do, isn’t it? Help each other?’
‘Yes,’ she replies quietly. ‘It is.’