Chapter 14
14
Rachel
Z ane Bradford sits in front of me in all his bare-chested glory. His blue eyes are locked on mine, and that muscle in his sexy square jaw moves as he fights the urge to run.
He grips my upper arms, and I’m practically a puddle from rubbing my hands all over his gorgeous body. He’s a work of art from his broad shoulders to his narrow waist. He has the body of an athlete, with smooth skin and lines carving his biceps and triceps, pecs, abs, and those transversus abdominis muscles that form that luscious V leading into his boxer briefs. Shivers .
Now, I slide my hands up his muscled shoulders to the back of his neck, pulling him closer. I blink down to his full lips, remembering how incredible they feel pressed against mine. I’ve craved their touch since our very first kiss in the library.
It was so much more than a kiss.
He’s breathing fast, and I can feel it in the barely restrained heat radiating off him. I’m not letting him go this time.
Sitting on the table, his face is only slightly higher than mine. I lift my chin so our lips are a breath apart.
“Kiss me.” It’s a mixture of request and supplication to my angry god.
I don’t have to ask twice.
With a groan, his mouth covers mine. It’s rough, yet careful, and I open my mouth at once to allow him full access. Our tongues curl and chase, and a whimper escapes from my chest on a breath.
My fingers curl in the back of his hair, and my back arches. I press my aching breasts to his firm body, and his hands grip the fabric at my lower back before sliding fully around me.
He lifts one hand to cup the side of my face, tilting my head so he can take control. It’s control I willingly give him. My panties flood with heat, and I’m slippery and wet, wanting so much more.
I want everything from him. I want him to take me and teach me. I want him to make me scream and moan and beg for more.
He groans, and he moves his hand down to my waist, but when he reaches the hem of my shirt, he hesitates. I don’t want him to hesitate.
Turning my face, my lips are against his cheek. “Touch me.”
His fingers fumble with the edge of my shirt, and I decide to make it clear. Leaning back slightly, I grab the bottom and pull it over my head. He hisses, and his eyes narrow, gliding down my neck to my breasts wrapped in thin satin and lace.
He’s seen me naked, but it’s the first time I’ve seen him hungry. He’s so gorgeous fighting his need in nothing but black boxers.
“Rachel…” he groans. “We can’t do this.”
Reaching behind me, I unfasten my bra, and it falls away. I’m breathing fast, and my nipples are taut. His eyes darken, and I take his hands, placing them on my body. My eyes close, and I exhale a whimper.
“Fuck,” he groans, and his hands flex, lifting and squeezing them, rolling my nipples between his fingers in a way that I feel in my pussy.
“Yes…” I reach for his face and kiss him again .
He kisses me aggressively, and I hold his cheeks, meeting his lips with mine, tangling his tongue with mine. I’m burning alive, and I never want to stop. It feels so good.
His hands slide from my breasts around my back, and he pulls me flush against his bare chest. We groan at the feel of bare skin against skin, and I carefully slide my hand lower, to his stomach.
The muscles jump, and I keep going until I feel it. I lose my breath, and my head is light. He’s wearing underwear, but I feel the hard, long cock between his legs. A little explosion goes off in my brain, and I want to hold it in my hand.
“It’s so big,” I gasp, and he cups my face.
“You’re driving me crazy, Rachel.”
“I’ve never done that before.” Wonder is in my eyes. “At least, I don’t know if I have…”
My fingers curl and slide, and he groans like I really am driving him wild. With another low groan, he grasps the top of my hand, stopping me.
“Do you know what you’re doing?” He sounds feral, like an animal.
I’m sure it means something’s wrong with me, because it thrills me to my toes. He wants me, and I want him. My stomach trembles, and I can’t lie to him.
Shaking my head, I look down at the rod straining his shorts. My mouth waters.
“You’ll have to show me,” I whisper. “I’ve never done this before, but I want to learn.”
Strong arms surround me, and he pulls me to his chest again with a low groan.
In this crushed position I can’t play with his cock like I want to. I’m pinned against his bare body, which is amazing, but I want to move. I want to touch him, kiss him, do everything with him.
I’ve spent years studying anatomy, learning about the body, giving massages. It’s the first time I’ve ever had the most perfect specimen of male right here wanting me. A man who is fierce and grumpy and caring and helpful… and dark and strong and sexy as fuck.
I squirm, and his arms relax. He places his hands on my upper arms again, moving me back. Then he looks down at my bare breasts again and groans.
“Fuck, you’re so pretty.” I think he’s in real pain when he reaches for the sheet and wraps it over my shoulders. “Get dressed. We can’t do this here.”
“Zane…” I want to argue with him.
The grown woman inside me who has waited so long for this, who has dreamed of this moment, who spent years taking care of a sibling I love very much, but who is the biggest cock-blocker of all time… I don’t want to stop.
“Trust me.” His tone is final. “Your first time shouldn’t be on a massage table on Miss Gina’s patio.”
“I don’t know.” I press my lips into a pout as I hold the sheet over my body. “I think it sounds sexy.”
“Sometime maybe, but not your first time.” He stands off the table, and he’s still erect.
“What about that?” I nod down at him.
“I’m a grown man, Rachel. I can handle an erection.”
“Won’t you get blue balls or something?”
His brow quirks, and a sexy smile curls his full lips. “I thought you were a healthcare professional.”
“I am.” However, as I straighten my shoulders, I realize what I’m doing right now is as far from professional as I can get.
“Then you know blue balls are a teenage myth often used for nefarious purposes.”
Biting my bottom lip to keep from smiling, I exhale a sigh. “I don’t know. I might have blue balls right now.”
He chuckles softly, walking to where his clothes are folded neatly on a chair. The muscles in his legs flex, and his ass is toned and firm. How is he so perfect?
“I’ve got to check on those kittens.” He takes the bundle and heads for the small bathroom behind the greenhouse without looking back. “Thank you, again.”
I sigh watching him go, then I look down at my bra and shirt on the floor. “You’re welcome.”
He’s gone, so he doesn’t hear my pouty reply.
I fasten my bra and restore my clothing. Miss Gina might have given me permission, but he’s right. I’m a professional, and while we’re not exactly coworkers, we have a Christmas tree coming and relatives for which to prepare.
But it sounded like he left the door open for a first time somewhere , right? I’m certain he did.
“This way!” I hold up my hands as the workers guide the tree on giant hammocks through the doorway. “Careful. Don’t hit the walls.”
Miss Gina doesn’t want the furniture rearranged in her house for obvious reasons, but we had to make a path for the tree to enter.
Zane and I worked together to move everything out of the way, and I put tape on the floor so we could be sure we put every piece back where it originally was. We’ve been the absolute picture of professionalism since our lapse earlier at the massage table, which isn’t to say we haven’t exchanged heated glances or covert smiles.
My stomach is a zippy tangle of knots, and I don’t know what to think is going to happen next… or when it might happen.
“We’re coming around the left side!” The delivery guy waves his hands.
I duck and reach for a tiny ceramic figurine I’m not even sure Miss Gina knows exists. It could’ve belonged to her parents, and I don’t know. Someone might care for it.
Doing my best to protect her things, I fuss at the guys and make sure they get the twelve-foot tree in front of the window like our dear employer wants.
I’m not sure what got into her head this year to want a tree, but she’s sweet to all of us. She gets what she wants.
After what feels like an hour of jumping and ducking—which was probably only twenty minutes—the big, beautiful tree stands proud in the front window.
When we’ve got the delivery guys safely away, Zane helps me put every bit of furniture in its original position. Then I go and find her.
“Doesn’t it smell amazing?” I hold her arm as we carefully enter the living-room-library.
I guess this entire wing is a library, considering how many shelves there are.
“My goodness. It’s so fresh!” Her brows rise, and I can tell she’s moving cautiously through the familiar space.
“Zane helped me put masking tape on the floor so we’d know where everything belonged after the men left. Not a thing is out of place.”
Her wrinkled hand grips the back of a chair, and she nods, smiling. “You did an excellent job.”
I glance over at Zane, who’s standing back watching. His eyes soften when they meet mine, and I almost forget to breathe. He’s never done that before.
Up to now, every time he looks at me, it’s been angry or impatient or worse, disinterested. I carefully smile, and the side of his mouth rises. Heat rushes through my veins at the sight.
He smiled at me.
“Tomorrow we can string the lights.” Miss Gina’s head tilts. “I think that’s something I can help you do, isn’t it? Since Zane is off on Thursdays.”
“Definitely! I’ll get the ladder, and you can help me wrap them around the tree.”
“I don’t like you on a ladder when I’m not here.” He uses the stern voice I know so well. “You could get hurt. ”
“Don’t worry, we’ll be very careful.” I give him a little eye roll.
“I’ve seen you faint.” His tone turns impatient.
“I told you, that never happens! I was in a hurry, and I should’ve just taken a beat, grabbed some candy?—”
“What’s this about? Why would you faint, Rachel?” Miss Gina grasps my hand. “Are you ill?”
“It’s nothing serious.” I slide my hand over the back of hers. “I have hypoglycemia, and if my blood sugar gets too low, I get light-headed. It’s so not a big deal.”
“It’s a big deal if you’re on a ladder.” He is not letting this go, and I make a stop it face.
“I’ve got it under control.”
His jaw tightens, and my favorite muscle moves with his annoyance. Good to know some things haven’t changed. I’ve kind of grown to like his sexy grumpy face.
“In that case, I’ll be sure we have plenty of sweets and cookies and soda…”
Miss Gina is listing all the sugary items she plans to have when the door opens with a knock. “Hello?”
The voice precedes a woman who would be my mother’s age if she were alive. It’s a woman I kind of recognize from when I was in high school. Very formal, tweed wool topcoat, St. John suit, and Hermès handbag.
“Claudette?” Miss Gina’s brow furrows. “What in the world are you doing here? I thought Alexis was coming.”
“Alexis is busy with her children. I made the drive myself.” The woman removes her coat, straightening her suit. “My goodness, what is going on here? Who are these people?”
Her tone is sharp, and she sizes up me then Zane like we’re robbers holding Miss Gina hostage.
“Mrs. Rosario, it’s so good to see you again. I’m Rachel Wells?” The woman frowns at me like I’m a bug, and I continue. “I went to high school with your daughter Alexis in Birmingham.”
Her upper lip curls, and her eyes narrow. “That must’ve been when Alexis had that unfortunate term in public school.” She turns to Miss Gina. “It was your brother’s idea. He thought she was losing touch with the common man.”
She waves a hand like that’s such a ridiculous notion. I haven’t seen Alexis in a while, but she seemed nice in school. I hope she hasn’t turned into her mother.
“Jameson was such a good brother.” Miss Gina smiles thoughtfully. “I miss his laugh.”
“I hope your loneliness hasn’t led to you making poor choices.” She turns suspicious eyes on Zane and me.
That gets my defenses up. “I have a degree in sports medicine from Auburn, and I came here on your daughter’s recommendation.”
“Is that so?” She seems skeptical. “I’ll have to ask if Alexis remembers you.”
My jaw drops, and Zane straightens, crossing his arms. From the flinty look in his eye, I’m pretty sure he’s as offended by this snobby woman as I am, and I appreciate him ready to spring into action.
“I’m sure Alexis will remember my dear Rachel.” Miss Gina’s calm voice cuts the tension. “She’s an amazing companion, and this is Zane Bradford. He’s one of the Newhope Bradfords—a very good family. I’ve known him most of his life.”
Claudette lifts her chin, and her helmet of auburn hair doesn’t budge. “And what does this fine young man do here?”
“I’m the new Stephen.” His tone is flat, and I bite my bottom lip to keep from laughing.
Claudette Rosario had better not push him.
“I see.” She crosses her arms, squaring her stance. “Well, young man, I’ve come to check on things. My sister-in-law is very kind-hearted and trusting, and I intend to make sure everything is in order and nothing unusual is occurring.”
“What in the world are you implying, Claudette?” Miss Gina walks to her sister-in-law, and I hold her forearm, helping her reach her goal. I wouldn’t say Miss Gina is angry, but an edge is in her voice. “I’ve been taking care of myself a long time.”
“Perhaps we’d better speak about this in private, Gigi.” The woman pats our employer’s hand. “I’m planning to spend the night, so I’ll just get my bag out of the Bentley while you finish up what you were doing.”
She turns and stalks out the front door, and I look over at Zane. His expression is difficult to read. He seems concerned, but he doesn’t seem angry, which annoys me. For a minute there I’d thought he was defending me.
I’m furious at this rude woman calling my high school “unfortunate,” and I don’t like her implying we’re doing something unusual here. I’m about to say as much when our old friend beats me to it.
“Claudette has always been a bit over the top.” Miss Gina reaches for my hand, and I pull hers into the crook of my arm. “I suppose you two had better head on out, and I’ll take care of getting her settled and easing her mind. Have a lovely evening.”
“Are you sure?” I slide my hand over hers. “We didn’t get to do any of our exercises today.”
“Oh no,” she cries, putting a hand over her eyes. “That means I’m going to be extra sore on Saturday!”
“I’ll take it easy on you.”
Zane steps forward, placing his hand on her shoulder. “I’ll see you Friday. Remember what I said about the fainting.”
“Don’t you worry,” Miss Gina nods. “I promise I’ll keep an eye on our favorite therapist. She won’t faint on my watch.”
He shakes his head, and I know he’s thinking what I’m thinking. How is a blind lady going to keep her eye on me?
I follow him out the patio door to collect my things. He picks up his tool bag, and we walk down the brick path that leads to the wrought-iron gate at the side of the yard.
“She’s got a lot of nerve,” I grumble, crossing my arms as we follow the walk around to the circle driveway. “Acting like we’re doing something wrong when we’re legitimate employees. Acting like we’d take advantage of Miss Gina.”
“I don’t know.” His tone is thoughtful, and my lips part in surprise. “Miss Gina’s old. She’s blind. She has a lot of money, and she lives in this big old house all by herself. I think it’s nice her family checks on her. I was starting to think she was all alone in the world.”
“She’ll never be all alone in Newhope. Everyone loves her here.”
“It’s true, but her family doesn’t know that.” We walk up to where our vehicles are parked. “Logan let you drive his rig?”
“Jack needed his truck. I wasn’t there when he left, so I don’t know how much Dylan had to do with it.”
He chuckles softly, and my cheeks heat. I’m starting to feel like Dylan had everything to do with me being here in Logan’s very expensive vehicle.
“You’ll ride with me from now on, like before.” He says it like there’s no room for debate.
“Yes, sir.” I tease, and his eyes darken.
Opening his door, he puts his tools in the back seat before taking my arm and escorting me to the Rover. He waits as I fumble to unlock it and stow my things on the passenger’s side. When I finally get it started, he steps back and closes the door.
I immediately roll down the window, but he only pats the top of the door. “See you back at the house.”
Gazing into the side mirror, I watch his attractive form saunter to his vehicle and climb inside. It’s not until I see the engine start that I put it in drive and head out to the street.
Eddie has never been much for sharing his feelings, but I can tell by the light on his face being with Allie today boosted his confidence.
“I’ve pretty much mastered the Dewey Decimal System.” He notes as we brush our teeth before bed. “Apparently a monkey learned it in a matter of hours.”
“Is that true?” I squint at him, leaning forward to spit .
When I straighten, he does the same. “It’s the most useful method for organizing small collections. Large, academic institutions are more likely to use the Library of Congress system.”
“Interesting.” I got nothing. “Did you meet any kids today?”
He shakes his head, walking across the hall to his bedroom. “I saw Austin, and Miss Dylan stopped by to say hi. She was dressed in ballet clothes.”
“She teaches dance as a PE option.” He doesn’t respond, and my chest is tight. “Did you like being at school?”
“It was okay.” He walks over to his bed and picks up the dog-eared copy of The Outsiders , his favorite book.
I chew my bottom lip, because it’s his go-to when he’s feeling stressed, kind of like my drag queen music. “You’re reading The Outsiders ?”
He turns the book and looks at the cover. “I was thinking about bleaching my hair.”
Pressing my lips together, I nod slowly. “In that case, we might get some new shirts… if we’re changing things up, I mean?”
“Maybe.”
Inhaling slowly, I don’t know if this is progress or not. It feels like progress, but I’ve learned to be cautious with my excitement where my brother is concerned. Three steps forward, two steps back.
“Well, don’t stay up too late reading, okay?” He nods, and I lean down to touch my lips to his forehead. “Stay gold, Ponyboy.”
He exhales a noise like a laugh, and I return to the hall, pulling his door shut. I think I’m making the right decisions for him now. He’s an almost-teenage boy, and I have no fucking clue what can of worms puberty will open for us.
But I think I’m doing alright. I press my hand to my chest and swallow the air in my throat. We had a bump in the road, but we managed it. Now we’re here in this place of community, and it feels so good. Hope is such a seductive emotion, and it expands so big in my chest, my ribs ache .
It’s been a while since I needed a mantra, but the one on my mind at this moment goes, Have gratitude now, while boldly waiting for what’s to come.
I wrap my arms around my waist and hug myself like I used to do in those days when I had no one else to give me a hug. Gratitude .
My eyes blink open, and I see the light under Zane’s door. Tiptoeing over, I knock softly. His low voice calls for me to come in, and I open it, stepping inside and quickly shutting it behind me.
He’s sitting on the bed in joggers and a tank, and I press my lips together at the sight. Damn those muscles, that sleeve of tattoos. Damn those broad shoulders and that light dusting of dark hair on his chest.
He sits straighter, when he sees me, putting the book aside. “Everything okay?”
He actually sounds concerned, and I almost exhale a laugh-sob. His first impulse is to help me, always. As is Dylan’s, as is Allie’s, as is Jack’s… All of them.
“Yeah, I um…” I look around for an excuse to be here. “I thought I heard a noise.”
His brow relaxes, and his lips press into a smirk. “It was probably Logan and Dylan. They can be loud.”
“I’m sure you’re right.” I nod, even though I made it up.
The house is quiet as a church.
His voice turns firm. “I really don’t like you climbing ladders when I’m not around, especially to decorate a twelve-foot Christmas tree.”
“I told you I’ll be fine.” I step closer to where he’s sitting. “I’ve been managing my condition since I was a teenager.” Looking around, I see the acupressure mat I left him. “Did you try this?”
“Yeah, what kind of sick joke is that?” His voice rises, and I huff the laugh I’ve been holding. “And you called me a psycho. It’s like a torture test. ”
“It’s supposed to be relaxing.”
“Are you able to relax on that thing? It’s like lying on a cactus.”
Chewing my lip, I recognize the book he’s holding. “You’re still reading it?”
He turns the light-blue paperback over and growls. “Goddamn Archer. Nobody is this fucking perfect. It’s like setting every man up to fail.”
“You sure are grumpy tonight,” I tease.
“Fair warning, I’m not going to notice whether you like folded chips or not.” He says it on a snap, but it sets off a kaleidoscope of butterflies in my chest.
“Okay.” I take a second to calm my internal squealing. “But you might notice something else?”
His jaw muscle moves, and his blue eyes look past me as if he’s thinking. “You really like grape candy.”
“Grape is definitely the best candy flavor. I don’t know why more people don’t recognize it.”
“And strawberry Pop-Tarts.”
“They’re the only ones that don’t taste artificial.”
I’ve stepped closer to him. Close enough that I could slide my fingers through his silky, dark-brown hair if I wanted. I could lean down and kiss his lips.
Instead, he rises to stand, and shit. At his full height, he towers over me with me in my bare feet.
I lift my chin, arching my neck to look up at him. “You’re so tall.”
He puts his hand on the desk beside me, bending lower. “Better?”
“Mm-hm.” This time I do reach up and thread my fingers in his hair.
I pull his face to mine and cover his lips with a kiss. He scoops his free arm around me, lifting me higher, closer, and our mouths open. Our tongues chase and curl, and that’s all it takes for us to be off to the races .
Our hands are everywhere, touching, grasping. I want to climb him like a tree—I almost do. My fingers curl against the side of his face, and I exhale a noise of pleasure. So much pleasure.
He groans, and it’s a deep vibration against my chest. It feels so good.
Lowering me, he stands higher, moving away. “Give me your phone.”
Frowning, I take it from my pocket and hand it to him. He taps quickly, and in a second, I notice a buzz on the desk.
“Did you text yourself from my phone?” I arch an eyebrow as if I disapprove.
I don’t disapprove. I’m thrilled.
“So I can check on you.”
Pressing my lips into a smile, I meet his blue eyes. “I like this protective side.”
Large hands grip my waist, and he pulls me to him roughly. “Get used to it.”
Leaning down, he starts to kiss me, and I’m on my tiptoes meeting him halfway. Looping my arms around his neck, I press my body fully to his. His hands slide down to grip my ass, and I’m off my feet. Two steps and my back is pressed to the wall.
His waist is between my thighs, and with every rock of our hips, energy surges in my core. I’m hot and wet and needy.
This amazing man, this strong, grumpy man who helps me so much and kisses me like he can’t get enough of me. I can’t get enough of him.
He tastes like minty toothpaste, and he smells like sandalwood and soap. Moaning, I pull up his shirt, raking my fingernails over his bare skin. His fingers thread in my hair, and he pulls my head back as he devours my neck, teeth scraping my skin.
One large hand finds the hem of my shirt, lifting it to cup my bare breasts, squeezing and kneading.
“Fuck, I love your tits.” Leaning down, he covers one with his mouth, and a moan escapes me on a hot breath .
Reaching up, he puts a hand over my mouth before moving to the other side, kissing, sucking, biting. It’s all so much, my head spins.
His cock is hard against my stomach, and I rock my pelvis, increasing the friction and heat between our most sensitive parts. Flexing my thighs, I ride him, rising higher on every wave of pleasure.
I’ve got to be quiet. I’m going to wake Edward, but my mind has tunneled. I want him inside me.
“Dammit.” He moves his hand from my breast to my ass, lowering me to my feet and pushing off the wall to get away. “Go to bed, Rachel.”
We’re both panting, and my brow furrows.
I blink my eyes open to look at him. “What?”
Please say I misunderstood him.
He grips my arm, moving me to the side so he can open the door. “You have to go to bed. Now.”
His tone is firm, but I’m dying. “But… But you’re… You can’t!”
At this point, he’s practically lifting me off my feet by my upper arms and placing me in the hallway. “Goodnight.” It’s a rough growl.
“Goodnight…?” I want to cry, beg, demand. No!
He’s standing in front of me breathing like the Hulk, and I shake my head, doing my best to use my words after that kiss, that grinding session.
“But what about you?” I nod at the erection straining his pants, my core tingling. “You can’t keep doing this. It’s not healthy.”
“I’m not going to fuck you in my bedroom.”
“Ever?”
I reach for him, but he catches my hand, moving it again to my side. “Not tonight.”
“Even if I say please?” I force a little smile, blinking up at him .
Another low groan. His fingers close around my hand, and he pulls it to his lips for a brief kiss. “We’d wake the whole house.”
“We might not.” I want to argue I can be good. I can scream into a pillow.
His eyes travel darkly over my body, lingering on my breasts, my tingling, tight nipples. “When I fuck you, I want to hear your loud moans, your screams. I don’t want to be restrained by anything.”
Oh .
My knees have officially melted.
“I want that, too.”
One last, long glance, and he steps forward, threading his fingers in the side of my hair and pulling my bottom lip with his thumb. “You said you trust me.” He leans down to kiss me again, briefly. “Sleep now.”
Releasing me, he closes the door, but my entire body is vibrating. Energy zips in my core, and I know for a fact I won’t be sleeping tonight.