Chapter 4
On the drive to her condo, Elise felt edgy. Despite the low-key dinner, the atmosphere in the car felt…charged. Maybe it was his scent, so woodsy and male, or the way his talented hand rested on the gear shift, so close it brushed her knee. Dear God in heaven, she wanted him to touch her.
Her leg. Her hair. Everywhere.
They reached their destination too quickly. The driveway was dim. No one was around. She didn’t know what to do with arousal simmering inside of her and all these feelings craving to get out.
He turned off the car. “We’re here.” Did his voice sound husky?
“Um, yeah.”
His hand fisted on the wheel and he stared out the windshield. Then he turned to her. “I’m sorry Elise, but I don’t want to let you go.”
“I—” Her voice was hoarse. “I don’t want to let you go either.”
“We got too close at dinner.”
“Maybe it’s been building. For me, at least.”
A long pause. A long, long pause. They looked into each other’s eyes and neither moved.
Then, he said, “Fuck it,” and hit the release on his seat. His chair flew back, making enough room for her.
“Fuck it,” she repeated and climbed on top of him. His hand went to her hair and fisted there.
Her fingers dug into his shoulder.
Their mouths met. Mated. His tongue found hers and they dueled. The kiss wasn’t gentle. She didn’t want it to be. She felt her breasts tingle and she shivered. He kneaded first one, then the other. Her moan was loud.
“That feels so good.”
His fingers fumbled as he unbuttoned her dress. Pushed it off her shoulders. Unclasped her black lacey bra. Then he took a nipple in his mouth.
She bucked, grabbed his shoulders. Wanted more. Needed everything.
Finn was inflamed by her reaction to him. His erection pressed cruelly against his pants, straining to be free. As if she read his mind, she moved back some. The belt jingled as she released it. The zipper rasped as she slicked it down. His erection was granite hard when she grasped onto him.
“No, don’t, I’ll come.” He swallowed hard. “Your panties.”
“Get them off!”
The scraps of lace ripped easily and he tossed them to the side. “Now, Finn, please.”
He thrust inside her. His head practically exploded. He thrust again. He felt her spiral, then his climax was upon him. Colors burst in his brain. The sound of fireworks blocked everything else in his mind.
And then there was just pleasure.
They breathed like bellows as they came down together. She laid her head on his shoulder. He managed to raise his hand to her nape and cradle her through the silky dark locks. After a minute or so, she drew back…and burst out laughing.
That was the last thing he expected.
She said, “I’ve never done anything like this before. It was so great. So raw. So wild.”
He laughed with her. “I feel like a teenager in the back seat of my father’s car.”
“Not with your skill, buddy.”
They laughed some more. Then she nestled back into him and he held her tight. Had he ever felt this content? This strong afterglow following sex? Time passed before she moved off him.
He raked a hand through his hair, then pulled up the seat.
He shook his head. “We shouldn’t be laughing.”
“Because of professional connection?”
“Yes. That’s why I tried like hell to resist you.
I violated my ethics.” He saw her frown.
“I wanted it, Elise. Making love with you meant the world me. But facts are facts. Even if you get someone else to work with you for your headaches, for infertility, I still did this…” He stopped abruptly, then pounded the steering wheel. “Oh no, we didn’t use protection.”
“I wouldn’t worry about that.”
He didn’t respond.
“D-do you feel guilty, Finn?”
“I don’t know. I should.”
“That makes me feel bad.”
“I’m sorry.” He grasped her hand. “I loved being that close to you.”
“I loved it too.”
“Then let’s take that with us.”
“That sounds like an ending. Spell it out, Finn. Do you plan never to see me again?”
“I don’t know. I’m not thinking clearly. I have to figure this out.”
She felt anger rise. “I see. Well,” she said opening the door. “Let me know when you do.” She climbed out and hurried into her condo.
* * *
Dear Elise,
I would like to say I don’t know what I did last night to make you angry, but I try not to lie to myself.
I diminished what happened between us by breaking it down to something to be figured out.
What we did was so urgent and primal it could only be felt.
But because you’re a client, I had difficulty handling it.
Please don’t be angry with me. I’m sorry.
Dear Finn,
You don’t play fair, mister. I want to stay mad at you.
I want to yell at you. I know why. I felt too much for you.
And you’re right, I compromised your ethics.
But I’m not sure what we can do about that from here.
It seems to me like it’s impossible to backtrack from a physical relationship.
But I can’t help wanting to see you again.
Dear Elise,
Maybe it’s not impossible to backtrack. We could still have a professional relationship. I know I can help you with self-healing for the migraines. And for infertility. Please give me another chance.
P.S. I compromised my ethics. You didn’t do it for me.
Dear Finn,
Professional, huh? I have to admit I’m anxious to hear what I can do on my own to deal with these terrible monster headaches. I tried to look it up online but got all confused…Reiki 1…Reiki 2… I lose track of what they’re saying.
Dear Elise,
When are you next free?
* * *
Finn treated a few clients the next day, did paperwork, and tried to keep his mind off Elise.
Around four, he decided he’d go visit Fiona.
A dose of his sister always cleared his head.
He found her sitting at the table outside, staring blindly at the pool.
Something was wrong. He could hear the TV from the playroom adjacent to the living room; the boys were watching a movie so he went right to her.
The sun was bright so she sat at an umbrella table.
“What’s wrong?”
She looked up. Bit her lip. He could see now that her eyes were swollen and red from crying. And her hands trembled.
“Is someone sick?”
“No, no, nothing like that.”
“What could be this bad then?”
“It’s Tim. Fuck him, Finn, he’s having an affair.”
“Tim? Your Tim? He’s one of the best guys I know.”
Moisture filled her eyes. “I thought so, too.”
Though he wanted to punch her husband in the face, none of that would help her now. He sat down across from her and held her hands. “Let’s talk this out. Is the affair over with?”
“He said he was going to see the woman and end it. He left a bit ago.”
“Fuck.”
“I’m not even sure what I want now. How can I ever trust him again?”
“People get over infidelity. They can go on after it happens if they both truly want their relationship to work.”
She closed her eyes briefly. “I thought I had the perfect life.”
“You know now nothing’s perfect.”
She shivered. “How could I ever let him touch me again? The thought that I made love with him while he was sleeping with another woman makes me ill.”
He studied her face. “Are you getting a headache?”
“My head’s pounding. I don’t know if it’s a migraine.”
“Want me to help?”
“You mean reiki? Now?”
“Why not?”
“It can’t hurt.”
“We’ll do it right out here. Stay seated. Relax as much as you can.”
She snorted. “Seriously?”
“Yes. Close your eyes.”
He stood and circled her chair. A warm breeze came up and rustled the trees, making the water lap softly. He put his hands at her ears. Concentrated. Soon, his hands warmed and he felt the blockages. He willed the flow of energy through the first one. Held it there for six minutes.
He waited. Then he put his hands on her crown. Soon, those blockages began to move. The throat chakra was next. This one was stubborn, but eventually, his hands got hot and they tingled. Finally, energy began to flow there, too.
When he finished, he said, “We’re done. You can open your eyes.”
She blinked. “I feel better.”
“I think we caught it at the onset.”
She reached up and squeezed his hand. “Thanks.”
He sat back down. “Want to talk more? It might help to get it all out.”
“It’s been going on for six months. Six months!” She shook her head. “It’s such a cliché. He met her at the gym.”
“Did he say why he did this?”
“He gave me the shit you’d expect. He’s feeling older. He’s having trouble at work.” Tim had a high-paying job at a large IT company. “And the boys clamor for his attention.” She waited. “The worst thing is he thinks our relationship is stale.”
“That one sucks. You go out together. Take trips without the boys…”
“It must be me. Have I let myself go?”
“No, honey, look in the mirror.”
She shuddered. “What if he doesn’t break it off with her?”
“You won’t stand for that. You’ll kick him out.”
“How will I know?”
“I’m not sure.”
They could hear the side door to the garage open and close. Tim came to the doorway to the porch. “Terrific. Your twin.”
Finn looked up at him. He couldn’t keep himself from saying, “Yep! Now I’m added to the mix. You’re a piece of work, Rayburn.”
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that.” He stepped onto the deck. “I’m am sorry, Fiona. My excuses are bullshit. I don’t know why I did it.”
Finn stood. “You two need to talk. I’m going to take the boys out to dinner. For what it’s worth, I recommend counseling. I have connections to get you in to see someone soon.”
Neither spoke and Tim sat down.
Finn went into the house and down to the playroom. “Hey, guys. Want to go for supper with me?”
“Yeah.”
“Yeah. Where?”
“We’ll decide that when we get in the car.”
Jason looked up at him. “Is Mommy okay?”
“She’s sad. And upset. So’s your dad. It’s grown-up stuff.” He almost choked on that statement. “Now, let’s go!”
* * *
“Take two!” John Gorman called out.