Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Seventeen
JESSA
D on’t tell Penny and Tally, but Ellie and Cooper’s wedding was the most beautiful ceremony I’d ever witnessed. Their weddings were beautiful too, but this one felt different. And as I watched the way they looked at each other when they vowed to spend the rest of their lives together, I realized the difference was in me. My calloused heart felt softer, my emotions were hovering closer to the surface, and I found myself tearing up, overcome with happiness for my friend. And when I looked over at Ethan, wiping away tears of his own, I knew it was impossible to go back to the way things were before the storm. Everything had changed, whether I wanted it to or not, and I was hopeful about the future for the first time in I don’t know how long. Now, I needed to figure out how I truly felt and where to go from here.
After the ceremony, we made our way to the tent for the reception, and the pressure was off. We’d made it through without the paparazzi showing up, and I could tell Ellie was feeling lighter and less stressed.
After the meal, Penny and Bentley gave their Matron of Honor and Best Man speeches, then Ethan stood and walked to the end of the table.
My heart did a funny fluttery thing when he took the mic and glanced over at me before addressing the crowd.
“For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Ellie’s brother Ethan.”
“Baby brother,” Ellie interjected.
“We’re only two years apart, but still, I’m the baby.” He shrugged.
Ellie bobbed her head, and everyone laughed.
“My birthday was kind of an inside joke in our family, actually, because I was born on April Fools Day. My dad didn’t believe Mom was in labor since it was a month before her due date. He thought she was pranking him. And Ellie, being less than two, mixed up my name with the month and called it Ethan Fools Day.”
The tent filled with laughter, and Ethan and Ellie smiled at each other.
“I mean, it was kind of accurate,” Ellie said.
“She’s not wrong. I’ve always been the funny one, the jokester. I don’t take things too seriously. And I love to laugh, so I’m pretty sure I was meant to be born on the biggest pranking day of the year.”
More laughter.
“And while I was always the family clown, Ellie was the romantic. She loves love and romance. If you ask her about any romantic comedy movie from the past thirty years, she will probably tell you she’s seen it. Multiple times.”
Ellie nodded, as did all of us girls.
“For as long as I can remember, Ellie has been in love with Cooper. But before they were a couple, they were friends. They were in each other’s lives for years.” His eyes found mine. “But their love happened suddenly and unexpectedly.”
My face burned and remained on fire even after he turned his eyes back to the crowd.
“Ellie never thought she’d lose her job and end up going on tour with Cooper’s band as their tour manager. But if she hadn’t gone, they might never have fallen in love. Things don’t always work out how we plan, and I’m constantly amazed at the way God has a better one.
“We’ve been through a lot together, my sister and I, and through the good times and through the loss, our faith has sustained us. Ellie, Mom and Dad would be so proud of the woman you’ve grown to be, and I’m equally proud to have been here to witness it all and so thankful for the bond we share.
“And Cooper, I’m so happy to officially welcome you into the family, even though you’ve been like part of this family for years.”
Ethan held up his glass.
“To Mr. and Mrs. Cooper Mason.”
Everyone toasted to the happy couple, and Ethan gave me a wink before taking his seat at the opposite end of the table.
Ellie and Cooper took to the dance floor for their first dance to “Hometown Muse,” the song Cooper had written for Ellie during his tour last year. I’d never thought about what it would be like to dance with my husband at our wedding since I pretty much never thought I’d experience that in my life. But in that moment, I wanted it. I wanted someone to look at me the way Cooper was looking at Ellie, knowing I belonged to my husband and he to me. Secure in each other’s love.
But a question stuck in my mind. Was forever love just an unrealistic fantasy?
As the final notes of the song played, Cooper spun Ellie around and brought her in again, dipping her back for a final kiss, and all the guests cheered.
Ellie danced with Ethan next, in place of the Father/Daughter dance, to “My Wish” by Rascal Flatts. More than a few people were sniffling on the sidelines or wiping away tears, including Ellie and Ethan.
Cooper’s band took to the stage next and played while Cooper shared a dance with his mom, then he took to the stage to perform the sweetest song he had written Ellie for their wedding day. It was the kind of song that, if released to the public, would become a favorite for weddings for years to come. And there wasn’t a dry eye in the house.
Before the dance floor opened up for the guests, there was one more dance that I’d been nervous about all night—the wedding party dance. I’d have to spend four minutes in Ethan’s arms in front of everyone. Part of me dreaded it. The other part longed for it.
As the band played, Ellie made her way into Cooper’s arms again, and I looked around the edge of the dance floor for Ethan, but he wasn’t there. I scanned the room as the other pairs headed onto the floor but came up empty.
Penny and Lloyd circled in front of me, and she gave me a questioning look.
I simply shrugged. My dance partner was nowhere in sight.
Then Ellie saw me, and I saw her gaze dart around the room for her brother.
I should’ve been relieved not to have to deal with these pesky feelings, but I was disappointed that I’d been forgotten.
Just when those feelings were beginning to morph into anger and my thoughts were turning to what I was going to do to Ethan when this dance was over, strong hands took hold of my waist. I found myself being rotated around to face Ethan, and he took my hand to lead me onto the dance floor.
“Where have you been?” I snapped, trying to hide my relief.
“It’s a surprise.”
I raised an eyebrow at him. “What kind of surprise?”
“If I tell you, it won’t be a surprise anymore.”
I smirked, and he slid his hand around behind my waist and drew me close.
He took my hand he’d been holding and placed it against his chest with his palm resting atop it and moved us further onto the dance floor, swaying gently to the music. The warmth of his body against mine, the pressure of his hand holding me near, and the feeling of his heart beating wildly beneath my palm had my stomach all a mess.
“This is weird.” I looked around the room, checking to see who was watching us.
“It’s not like we haven’t danced together before.”
“The Sawmill’s different. Nobody’s watching there. Everybody’s focused on themselves.”
He tilted his head toward the guests. “So are all these people.”
I noticed several couples had moved onto the dance floor to join in the dancing—Grandma June and Hal, Cooper’s parents and grandparents, and … Jimmy and Vonda. My eyes shot to Ellie’s, and I pointed in their direction. Her eyes widened, and she grinned as she waved her arms back and forth in the air triumphantly. She had long believed Jimmy and Vonda from the diner were a thing, and it certainly appeared she was right by how close they were dancing.
“You know, this isn’t the first time we’ve danced together in front of the whole town,” Ethan said.
I wrinkled my nose at him. “What are you talking about?”
“That year Ellie made you try dance with her, I joined too, and we had to do that dance together for the recital.”
I lowered my head. “Those were dark days.”
He grinned. “I remember it fondly. Dancing with an older woman.”
“Yeah, I was robbing the cradle.”
“How did Ellie even talk you into that?”
“I have no idea. I’m sure she bribed me somehow. I have vague recollections of that time in my life. I’ve blocked it out from the sheer embarrassment of it all. I do remember you doing The Worm, though.”
He laughed. “Oh, yeah, I had mad dance skills.”
“Oh, for sure,” I replied sarcastically.
“You don’t believe me?” His eyebrows raised. “I’ll prove it.”
He let go and dropped to the floor before I could stop him and proceeded to do The Worm in the middle of the slow song, while everyone around us backed up to give him space.
I covered my mouth and laughed into my hand at his antics.
He hopped up and gave a bow, soaking in the applause, and came back into my arms with a smug grin on his face.
I leaned my forehead against his chest and groaned.
“How was that?” he spoke close to my ear so I’d hear above the applause.
I kept my head down. “You are too much.”
“That was my big move to impress you.”
I lifted my head and laughed. “That’s your big move?”
“Back then it was. I wanted to make you see me. To make you laugh.” He wasn’t joking now.
“We were just kids.”
“And I liked you even then.”
His admission rendered me speechless. I had no idea that he was that concerned with my attention at that time in our lives. He was always trying to get me to watch what he was doing, but I ignored him, snapped at him, or told him to go away.
A new song began, and I had no desire to stop dancing with him.
Penny and Luke danced their way over to us, and Penny held her phone out. “Jasper just sent me this.” She showed us a picture of the paparazzi holding up their cameras, taking pictures of the fake bride and groom coming out of the fake wedding. “He said they took off in their cars after the limo, which will be driving them around in circles in the opposite direction of town.”
We cracked up laughing and high-fived each other.
“Excellent plan, Jessa,” she said.
“Glad I could help.”
“You’re amazing,” Ethan said as he hugged me close.
Luke leaned toward us. “Vroom vroom.”
“Get out of here, dude.” Ethan pushed his arm, and Luke roared with laughter as he danced Penny away.
My curiosity was piqued. “What was that all about?”
Ethan shrugged. “Beats me.”
Hours later, after the cake had been cut, the dancing had gone on for hours, and the bouquet had been tossed—purposely in my direction, causing me to duck, might I add—we headed outside to line up for the happy couple’s departure. We lit sparklers, and Ellie and Cooper came running out as we cheered, stopping at the end of the line for their photographer to take a few kissing photos.
Then the sound of brass instruments and drums stole our attention, and we all looked across the lawn as the high school jazz band played “L.O.V.E.” by Nat King Cole, directed by Mr. Bateman, Cooper’s former jazz band teacher.
“No way!” Cooper’s smile lit up his face, and he and Ellie laughed and hugged. “This is awesome.”
“I love it.” Ellie beamed.
We moved closer to listen, and I elbowed Ethan as we walked. “Is this the surprise?”
He grinned. “One of them.”
The remaining guests crowded around the band, and several couples began to dance right there on the lawn as the fading pink and purple sunset gave way to the dark star-filled sky. Among them were my three best friends and their spouses.
My heart sank a little. That’s it. I’m the last of us. The last Solo Sister.
A warm hand wound around mine, and Ethan was there beside me.
“May I have this dance?” His head was tilted a little, causing his hair to fall to one side in a way that made me want to reach up and push it back in place. He had a twinkle in his eye, and one corner of his mouth was turned up.
I pressed my lips together and tried not to react, but it was no use. I found him incredibly attractive when he smiled like that, and I wanted nothing more than to be close to him.
When I moved toward him, his eyebrows raised, and he opened his arms to me. “I expected a little more resistance.”
“I’m too tired to resist.”
He brought me flush against his body with his arms around my waist, and I wrapped mine around his upper back as I rested my chin on his shoulder and leaned my head against his.
“You must be tired,” he said. “If I’d tried this any other time, you’d have kneed me in the groin.”
“The night is still young.”
His laughter vibrated through my body, and I burrowed closer. He didn’t laugh after that. He tightened one arm around my waist while the other hand slowly traveled up and down my back. His fingertips slid under my hair and skimmed across my skin, sending pleasant tingles everywhere.
I couldn’t stay still any longer, so I moved my hands higher, burying my fingers in the hair at the base of his neck. His breath was hot against my neck as he turned into me.
“That feels good,” he whispered.
“Your hair is softer than I thought it would be,” I said.
“You’ve thought about my hair?”
I tugged on it hard enough for him to react.
“Ow!”
“I thought it would be crunchy like Ross on Friends. ”
He laughed, but I shut him up by raking my fingers against his scalp, and I liked the little groan that caused.
“You’re driving me crazy right now.” His voice sounded strangled.
“I didn’t have to do anything. You were already crazy.”
His arms clamped even tighter around me. “You know exactly what I’m saying, Jessalyn.”
I raised my head to scold him for using my full name, but the desire in his eyes seared through me, and I felt ready to burst into flames.
His gaze dropped to my lips, and I swallowed hard.
“Ethan.” I wanted to tell him to stop. Everyone we knew was dancing feet away from us. I wasn’t sure I was ready for this to go public.
“I have to kiss you.” His eyes locked with mine, and he leaned in slowly as if waiting for my permission. When I didn’t respond, he closed the distance and pressed his soft, full lips to mine.
It was the perfect amount of pressure, our lips perfectly melded together. Long seconds later, his lips parted from mine, but he kept them close, softly brushing back and forth against mine until I gave into him, and we breathed into each other as we kissed again.
I wasn’t one to swoon like Ellie, but I felt a little lightheaded as he swept his fingers through my hair and held my head in place with his palm to the back of my head, deepening the kiss. I raised up on my tiptoes and gripped the back of his suit coat, desperate to be as close as possible. I got lost in our kisses and nearly forgot where I was.
“Get a room!” Luke cried.
“Woohoo!” Penny cheered.
I was snapped back to reality and tore my lips from his. My cheeks were on fire as our friends cheered loudly, and I was embarrassed by how out of control I felt. I’d never made out in public before, but that was basically what we’d done. It was like nobody existed but us, and that felt dangerous.
Ellie rushed straight over and wrapped her arms around both of us, pulling us together. “This is like my dream come true.”
Ethan was beaming with joy and refused to let go of me, even when I pressed against his chest to remove myself from his embrace.
At that moment, the jazz band finished the song, and there was a loud pop and then whistling sounds followed by bursts of white sparkles in the sky above.
“Fireworks? Who did this?” Ellie cried as she stared up at the glittery display and then ran into Cooper’s arms. “I love this so much.”
“Surprise part two, I presume?” I asked Ethan.
He simply smiled.
“If the paparazzi didn’t know they’d been conned by now, the fireworks will probably give them a clue.”
He shrugged. “Maybe so, but we did it. My sister is hitched. And I got to make out with my crush.” He drew me close again, which had me wiggling to get away, not wanting to give our friends another show. “I’d say it’s the best day of my life so far.”
“Wow! Best day, huh?”
He leaned close to my ear. “You’re a really good kisser.”
“Seeing as you’re the second person I’ve ever kissed, that’s high praise.”
His head jerked back to look me in the eyes. “Are you kidding?”
“Why would I kid about that?”
“I feel honored or something.”
I avoided eye contact. “It’s not a big deal.”
“Yes, it is.” He tilted his head, trying to get me to look at him. “Jessa.”
I pushed against his chest again, and this time, he loosened his grip and let me go to stand beside him. He didn’t let me get far away, though. The back of his hand brushed against the back of mine just before his fingertips skimmed the inside of my wrist, then my palm, then between my fingers until he was holding my hand.
I swallowed hard at the rush of emotion. With my hand in Ethan’s, I felt wanted and secure. He cared for me, and I knew he would never play games with my emotions like Cody had. The realization that I might be ready for a relationship again struck the iceberg encompassing my heart like the Titanic, sending a gigantic chunk plunging into the ocean of my past heartbreak.