Chapter 13 #2
“Not exactly.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “They’re referring to Auntie Hanifa’s potluck. Not sure if you remember…”
“The kiss when we were teenagers?” Now it was her turn to feel heat rising to her face.
He gave her a sheepish half shrug.
“Someone reported that to the police?” Then, in a smaller voice—“Someone saw us?”
“Big Auntie is always watching, right?”
Their kiss was a lifetime ago. During one of the lowest moments of her life.
Mere weeks after her father’s death, her mother had dragged her and Lulu to a dinner party, insisting enough was enough—it was time to move on.
But Hena couldn’t bear to be around the easy banter and chatter while her emotions were churned up and spinning.
Seeking a reprieve, she’d wandered outside after dinner and sat on a bench overlooking the retention pond.
Haris had found her there. Asked if she was okay—the only person who had.
And when she cried, he’d sat beside her, silent, his arm around her shoulders.
He hadn’t said much. Hadn’t tried to fix anything.
He just listened. She couldn’t even remember how the kiss had happened, exactly, except it had been sweet.
By the following year, she was with Nasir. They never spoke of it again.
But someone had spied on them all those years ago. Someone had stored up the memory, and they decided now was the time to share it?
“That’s sick,” she muttered.
“It’s ridiculous,” Haris agreed. “Milcheck knows it. He’s just fishing. But we do need to discuss some things. Later, when you have the headspace. I know you’re already dealing with enough.”
“No, go ahead,” she said.
He hesitated. “To be clear, if you’re not comfortable discussing it, I completely understand. Just know whatever you do tell me stays between us. Attorney-client privilege.”
“I appreciate everything you’ve done,” she told him. “Ask me anything.”
“They can’t access your financial records without a court order, so no need to worry for now,” he said.
“But if they do gain access, and the transactions indicate the money withdrawn was yours, I want to warn you it’ll get messy fast. So if any money was exchanged, it would be better to tell me sooner rather than later, so we can get ahead of it and plan accordingly. ”
Her eyes slid to the pavement. She had told Haris he could ask her anything. She couldn’t talk about this, though. She couldn’t.
They were silent for a few moments, and then Haris spoke again.
“In case it helps,” he said gently, “I’ve lent him money too.”
She looked at him with a start. Of course. And the way he was looking at her—he already knew.
“There was this person,” she said, her voice catching. “Someone Nasir owed money to. They’re the one who…who started it all, really.”
“Nasir told me someone was harassing him,” Haris said. “He’d clam up when I asked for details. Said he didn’t want to put anyone in danger.”
“He wouldn’t tell me much either,” Hena said. “They’re the ones who got him caught up in the high-stakes tables. When Nasir lost, they gave him credit. Over and over again. I didn’t know about it for years, until he was in too deep.”
She pressed her back against the car, trying to steady herself.
“I don’t know why he kept going back, even after he’d swear he was done.
I told myself if he wasn’t done, then I was.
I must’ve made that promise a dozen times.
But when it came down to it, how could I leave him?
And how could I say no when he needed money?
Especially when it was a matter of life or death by the time he came to me. ”
She shivered, remembering the black eyes. The dislocated shoulders. The broken ribs. Unlike her father, Nasir didn’t have a mean bone in his body. It was what had drawn her to him. It was also what had made him such easy prey.
“But he was done with all that. He’d moved on,” Haris said. “Work was going good. We were hitting the gym every week. I saw it in his eyes. He was getting his life back on track.”
“I thought so too. It’s why we set our wedding date. I believed him.”
“Of course you did. From what I saw, I think he believed it too. Look, you don’t need to feel bad for lending him money. It’ll raise questions with Milcheck because it wasn’t disclosed earlier, but it’s understandable why you were hesitant to share. And giving him money isn’t a crime.”
This was the painful part to admit. Even to Haris. Especially to Haris.
“I didn’t lend him the money this time.”
Haris tilted his head.
“You didn’t lend him the money,” he repeated. He paused for a moment. When he spoke again, his voice was lower, as though he was afraid to say the words. Afraid to hear the answer. “Are you saying he stole it?”
“I don’t know if it’s stealing.” She wrapped her arms around herself. “We were going to be married soon, right? He didn’t clean me out completely. I’d transferred a bit of my trust into an account for the cottage we were about to close on. He knew where I kept my log-ins and passwords.”
“How much did he take?”
She paused. Then—
“All of it,” she whispered. “He emptied the account.”
The corner of his mouth twitched. He took a second before speaking.
“Unbelievable,” he said. “Even for him.”
“I should’ve been more vigilant. I knew he had a problem. He didn’t mean to—”
“Hena…no. This was a bridge too far. I loved him too, but this?”
“Something was off with him all week. I should’ve dug deeper,” she said. “He was getting paranoid. Looking out the windows constantly. He started talking about getting a gun. Can you imagine Nasir with a gun? I pressed him on it, but he swore he wasn’t gambling anymore.”
“But he emptied your bank account. So…”
“Someone was after him,” she told Haris. “The person who tried to kill me—he said the attack was a message.”
Haris exhaled. He gazed at the road in the distance.
“He really fucked up,” he said quietly.
“He tried so hard. I know he did. He couldn’t kick the habit.”
“I meant with you, Hena.” His eyes locked onto hers. “What more could he have wanted? How could he throw it away? He betrayed you in the worst way possible. It’s unforgivable.”
Hena moved to speak, to defend him, but she stopped herself, afraid she might start crying.
Haris was right. Nasir may have had his reasons, but there was no getting around the fact he had betrayed her.
Over and over again. She had loved Nasir, loved him with everything she was, and love had blinded her to the truth of the situation.
Love had fooled her into thinking it was enough. And it wasn’t.
She laid her head against Haris’s chest. He put his arms around her shoulders, resting his chin on her. He was warm. Comforting. He smelled like lemons. Her thoughts drifted back to their kiss beneath the lemon tree.
It was a road not taken, wasn’t it?
What if she had taken this road?
How different would her life have been?
She started. The thought felt treasonous. To whom? To Nasir? The man who walked away three years ago and never looked back?
There was no use dwelling on what-ifs, she reminded herself. It was too late for all that.
Still, with Haris’s familiar arms around her, the ache in her chest eased. Not gone. But for now, a little easier to bear.
And for now, it was enough.