Chapter 38
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Juliet prepared two coffees at the breakfast bar in her kitchen, worrying at the inside of her cheek.
She hadn’t really ever planned this. And even though she’d played through the conversation in her mind all of the previous night, nothing felt quite right in the light of day.
She turned toward the kitchen table where Robbie sat, staring up at her with his eyebrows lifted slightly, his lips ticked up into the smallest of smiles.
“Here.” She put his coffee down in front of him, unable to not grimace at it.
Robbie drank so much sugar in a single cup of coffee, it was a wonder his teeth were still in his head.
Clearly knowing what she was thinking, as they’d had that conversation many times before, he flashed his pearly whites at her.
“Thank you very much.” He reached out, wrapping one of his hands around the mug but not lifting it to his mouth just yet. “So… as far as I’m aware, we still have our schedule planned through the end of next month.”
It was all he needed to say, to prompt her. Because this was weird for them.
“Right,” she agreed, feeling oddly nervous.
She considered Robbie one of her closest friends. But… Juliet’s genuine inner-circle was limited to her fake boyfriend and her assistant, so it wasn’t like he had much competition.
For the last eight – almost nine – years, they would meet every three months at Juliet’s house, have coffee, and arrange their schedules for the following twelve weeks.
What events they had on the docket, what made sense to do together, what they could reasonably skip.
What would have the best, most lasting impact.
But Robbie was absolutely correct; they weren’t due for a coffee calendaring date for another month.
Juliet never felt nervous around Robbie, because she had nothing to hide from him.
But she felt very nervous right now. Because, for the first time in almost a decade, she was going to do something that would totally change his life.
Strangely, their relationship felt very real right now. In the “break up.”
Robbie sent a knowing look. “It’s not me, it’s you?”
Juliet leaned heavily back in her chair, hands going slack where they were wrapped around her mug. “What?”
She hadn’t expected him to know.
Robbie sipped his coffee, slowly lowering the cup back to the table. “I figured I’d beat you to the punch. That’s what we’re having this meeting for, right?” His lips twitched into his signature, charmingly crooked smile. “You’re breaking up with me, Juliet Jacobs.”
God, it sounded so… surreal. She was ending her relationship with Robbie. No, it wasn’t “real” in any true romantic or sexual sense.
But it had been a part of her since she’d been eighteen.
She’d entered into this relationship with him and hadn’t ever had a plan for when it would end.
Juliet had known, at some point, it would.
But that point had never been something she could visualize.
It hadn’t made sense to her to even contemplate it before. That was a post-fifth album reality.
And Juliet hadn’t let herself dream about that, before. That reality had been so far out of her grasp and she couldn’t do anything to speed up the timeline. It only served to make her mad and sad and claustrophobic when she’d thought about it. Trapped.
However, the dream was very much alive, now. It was alive and glittering, dancing at a distance so close she could almost hold it.
“How’d you know?” she asked.
“Uhhh, the premiere?” Robbie barked out a laugh. In fact, he laughed so hard, he almost started crying. “After all this time together, do you think I’m actually an idiot?”
She hummed, teasingly, before sobering. “No. I don’t.”
Robbie wasn’t the most well-read person in any room, but he was far from stupid. Especially when it came to reading people.
He released a soft sigh, holding up his hand, his index finger and thumb an inch apart. “You were this close to telling Kerrington Kosta to fuck off and back away from your woman.”
She groaned, dropping her head back. For a few seconds, she held her breath, simply feeling her heart beat. Then she released it slowly, admitting, “I know.”
With a quiet, embarrassed laugh, she shook her head. God, that was exactly what she’d felt like.
Juliet lifted her head back up, staring imploringly at Robbie. There was this gnawing, guilty feeling in the pit of her stomach that she just couldn’t kick.
“I’m sorry.” Her voice was so quiet, as somber sounding as she felt inside. She drew up her shoulders in a tight shrug. “You and I have been a team in this for over eight years. And now…”
“And now, you’re part of a different team. With Darcy,” he supplied for her.
She blinked back at him, slowly nodding. “Yeah. I guess I am.”
And Robbie was correct in the way he’d said it: it was already done. She already was locked in with Darcy, and that was where she wanted to be. Even if she felt bad about throwing Robbie’s life into the unknown, even though she was nervous to jump into it for herself.
Robbie leaned back more heavily against the chair, readjusting his feet on the floor into a slightly wider stance. “Can’t say I didn’t see it coming.”
“Since when?” She wanted to scoff at him, but mostly, she was just plain curious. When – how – had it been clear to him, even if it hadn’t yet been to her?
“The Country and Folk Awards.” He informed her, simply, before he took another sip of his coffee, tilting the mug far back, finishing it.
Juliet swore she could hear the record scratch in her mind. She whipped her head around to face him, completely. “What?! That was… that was in October.”
No way he’d known back in October; there hadn’t been anything to really know, then! Not – not really.
He let out a satisfied ah sound, putting his mug down on the table for the final time.
“Yeah. But you were staring. Like, in a way you’ve never stared at anyone, before.
” He arched his eyebrow sharply up at her.
“Think about it, Juliet, I’ve known you throughout every hookup you’ve ever had.
I know what’s your typical behavior and what isn’t.
Darcy hasn’t been typical since day one. ”
She sat with that, turning away from him and staring blankly across her kitchen. She couldn’t argue with that.
Darcy had been different, in every way. Everything about her feelings for Darcy from long before they’d started hooking up ran more intense, more passionate, than she’d ever felt for anyone else.
It was precisely as Darcy had said yesterday: they’d been one another’s since the very beginning.
“Yeah,” he said, tapping his knuckles lightly against the table. “So, I’ve seen this coming for a while, now. Been planting the seeds here and there.”
Juliet’s mouth fell open, aghast. “You’ve been what?”
And, admittedly, she was a little impressed.
Robbie’s role for the last nearly eight-plus years had been listening to Juliet’s machinations, and then going along with them.
Make no mistake, he went along with them very well.
He was a great performer. But he was definitely not the one who came up with the plans.
His smile returned, cocky and annoyingly charismatic.
“Nothing overt,” he assured her. “Just mentioning in some one-on-one conversations that we haven’t been as close lately. Made sure to tell people that neither of us was to blame, that nothing was going wrong between us. Just wanted to lay some groundwork.”
She reached out and pushed at his shoulder, rolling her eyes.
“Hey, clearly it was a good idea,” he defended with a chuckle, holding up his hands.
“Clearly it was,” she agreed, softly. She stared down into her own coffee, looking at her reflection, before she looked back at him. “Since you’ve been thinking about your plans, what are you going to do, now?”
Unlike Juliet, Robbie wasn’t under anyone’s thumb. Not even the label; he didn’t have any morality clauses in place. But Juliet knew from their talks over the years that – again, unlike Juliet – he had every intention of keeping his sexuality firmly under wraps, long term.
“Well, I’m definitely not going back to hooking up with women for real.” He snorted.
She echoed it, because… wow. Yeah, she’d forgotten that he’d done that in the past.
Robbie shrugged. “The last eight years have really…” He trailed off, giving her a stare that was far more serious than she’d expected. “It’s really taught me a lot. About myself. And life. And – funny enough – about relationships.”
She understood exactly what he was saying, nodding thoughtfully in agreement.
Their romance might have been fake, but they’d been each other’s most constant relationship for a long time.
She’d had Robbie even before she’d had Laura in her life.
And managing their arrangement had required a lot of clear and open communication.
It had also called for a lot of showing up for one another, being loyal to their commitments.
The Robbie she’d met when she’d been eighteen had been very different than the man he was, now. Barely twenty, he’d occasionally hookup with women for real, like he’d said. Even though he wasn’t attracted to women at all, he was petrified of being found out. Even more than Juliet had been.
They’d learned how to navigate all of this, together.
“I’ll probably, eventually, try to find a different sort of arrangement.” He gestured between them, capturing her gaze with his, as he stated softly, “But there won’t be another Juliet Jacobs. That’s for sure.”
Unexpectedly emotional, she reached out and put her hand over his, squeezing tightly. “No. There won’t be.”
She’d meant to say it in a light, glib tone. But it came out unexpectedly serious, because it was how she felt about him. They’d both found one another, been what each other needed, at exactly the right time. And, she imagined, their lives might have been a lot messier if they hadn’t.