Chapter 8 #3
She closed her eyes as if to block out what she was going to say.
“He was going to kill me and then demand my dowery from Ross. He said he deserved the dowery for the pain he’d suffered on the trip home from Gretna Green.
” She paused, then looked at him and admitted, “But, now it’s me who cannot heal. Me who carries the shame.”
She continued to cry quietly before she confessed. “I can’t have children.”
“I know.”
“My son. He’s not my son.”
He nodded, too afraid his voice would crack if he tried to speak.
“I was traveling to London to get the girls. Forrester had written to me about them and I felt their plight so deeply,” she took a large shuddering breath.
“On our journey, my driver stopped at the same inn where William and I had stayed on our way to Gretna Green. William was such a gentleman that night.” Then her face crumbled in pain.
“He acquired two separate rooms, but what I didn’t know was that he ravished the inn keeper’s daughter the very night I dreamt of him becoming my husband. ”
“Are you certain your son is Bredlebane’s?” It wasn’t that he doubted the man was guilty, but the child wouldn’t be the first bastard someone claimed belonged to a gentleman.
“Yes. She was just sixteen and innocent. She did not consent. He raped a girl younger than Robbi.” She admitted. “The girl and her parents didn’t want Dorian. The girl couldn’t look at him or hold him or care for him. He has William’s eyes.”
He’d heard many a lady extolling the virtue of Bredlebane’s blue eyes. It was as if they believed the color of a man’s irises determined the goodness of his heart. If that were the case, his own soul was black as the deepest loch in Scotland.
“Are you going to raise him as your own?” he asked.
“He was born of my sin, and William’s. I will not let Dorian suffer for our actions.”
“You committed no sin.”
“But don’t you see? I did. I brought evil to that young girl’s doorstep.”
He shook his head, unable to believe what he was hearing. “That was no sin of yours. Bredlebane committed the heinous act. Don’t accept his sins as your own.”
She nodded slowly in acquiescence, but he knew she didn’t believe it. Not yet.
“It’s a crime to pass a bastard off as a legitimate heir.” He knew all too well the dangers he faced with his own lie about Sébastien. He was very aware of what he was doing. But he needed to warn her.
“The real crime was what William did to that girl, yet the ton would never look down upon Bredlebane. I am merely attempting to atone for his crime.”
“You bestowed an allowance on the girl, didn't you?” He asked.
“I gave her a dowry of sorts. Her parents had arranged for a marriage to a good young farmer who was caring and had loved the girl for some time. He will take good care of her.”
“Was she injured as you were?”
“Not as badly, no.”
He gazed at the white expanse of her delicate neck where the pulse fluttered ever so gently.
He lowered his head to that spot on her creamy skin.
She was as soft and decadent as he’d ever imagined as he closed his eyes and savored the taste of her on his lips.
When he pulled back and looked into her eyes, he was lost as she stared at his mouth as if she wanted to taste him as well.
The water to his bath was getting cold, and his shoulder was aching from the way he was supporting her weight. As if sensing his discomfort, or perhaps feeling a bit of her own, Caillen gave him a weak smile. “You can release me, Simon.”
“To be honest, I’m not sure I can.” He looked down at her wet dress, molding to her beautiful form. “I’m afraid you are soaked to the bone.”
“I will clean up the mess I make.”
He scowled down at her. “You will not. I will tell the staff to clean it up.” He shifted her body. “There, put your hand on the edge of the tub and pull yourself up while I assist you at the same time.”
Within seconds she was standing over him. It did not escape him the way her eyes traveled to his manhood before she turned her back on him.
“You won’t say anything about Dorian, will you?” She asked, pausing as she began to dry her gown.
“It will be our secret, but does anyone else know? You showed no signs of being in a family way while you were at my mother’s residence and you had servants with you.”
“I trust my maid, Jane, explicitly. As for my driver and the outriders who were your footmen Charlie and John, they were paid handsome bonuses for their discretion and were advised that my son had been cared for while I recovered. The innkeeper and his wife were very grateful, and their daughter has been hidden away since they found out she was with child. She is very fragile at the moment, but she’s with a patient man who loves her. ”
“Do you believe that to be true?”
“I believe her parents love her and they believe it to be true. I can only trust in that.”
He nodded in agreement, although she did not see it as she wrapped a linen around herself and continued to soak up the water from her skirts.
“If you’ll excuse me.” Caillen walked into his bedchamber, and he began washing the rest of his body while wondering if she’d continue walking right out of his life for good.