Chapter 18 - Reality Dawns
Chapter 18
Reality Dawns
Monday
Noah wasn’t sure he closed his eyes as Cora Lee Buchanan slept in his arms in her apartment above his bookshop, and he didn’t care. He held Cora against him as they listened to the rain. They were cocooned in her grandmother’s quilt, but unlike last night they were kissing and touching. Now and then they rested and told each other childhood stories they’d never told anyone.
Noah felt half drunk on coffee. Every time he pulled her close and the talking stopped, they went deeper into passion. During relaxing they shared their dreams and fears.
She’d got up twice. Once to lock the door and once to see if it was still storming. When she came back, he smelled mint toothpaste. So, before she could cuddle next to him, he vanished to her bathroom and had a short debate whether to use her toothbrush or his finger.
The toothbrush won out.
He thought of suggesting they sleep together before dawn, then part before the world found them, but he wanted the loving to come slowly so he’d remember it all. The beginning was so sweet he didn’t hurry anything.
It took an hour to kiss her just right, then he moved her hair back and kissed her neck for a while, loving the way she tasted and smelled. Even in sleep she made little sounds of pleasure. He didn’t take off any of their clothes but he learned the lines of her body with a light touch.
He kissed her tenderly as he held her against him. She might be sleeping but her body responded to each kiss, every touch. When he finally pulled away, he saw her eyes were open. “You all right, my Cora?”
“Yes,” she answered in a sleepy voice. “Don’t stop. I feel like I’m dreaming but my eyes are wide open.”
His hand moved down her back, bolder than before. His fingers moved, featherlight over her hips. “I’ll kiss you until you tell me to stop.”
“That will be a long while.” She blushed. “I want more, please.”
His lips moved over her face as he followed her order. When he finally broke so she could breathe, he said, “If you don’t mind, I’d like to touch you . . . and kiss you . . . and taste you while you sleep. I’m suddenly addicted to you.” His hand moved over her hip once more and patted her lightly. He wished her jeans were missing, but she deepened the kiss as he patted her again.
They were learning to communicate without words.
“Suddenly you are my world, and somehow, in a blink, I know I’ll never be whole without you,” he said. “I’ll treasure you until my last breath, Cora.”
She smiled and wiggled closer. Her lips were swollen and open as he tasted them while his hand rested over her breast once more. “I’m hungry for one more full-out kiss before I let you sleep. Any objection?”
She opened her mouth in answer.
He kissed her like he’d never kissed a woman, as he rolled on top of her. He felt her moving beneath him, settling in, making little cries of pleasure as he learned her body. When she broke the kiss, she turned away but exposed her throat.
“More?” he whispered against her ear.
“Yes,” she answered.
His mouth moved down her neck and picked the next place to kiss. Then, as fast as the storm had raged inside of him, it calmed. He rolled on his back, pulling her atop him. She was with him and he realized he couldn’t let her go.
Noah pressed light kisses across her face and over her neck. He gently pushed her hair back. He could feel her rapid breathing but he needed to see her face.
“You all right, dear?”
Her words came slow and hoarse. “I’ve never been kissed like that.”
“I feel like I stepped into heaven with you, Cora.”
Those big green eyes looked at him with wonder. “What does it mean?”
He studied her as his logical brain returned. “We could go through months talking, even years of moving slow, but I’m thinking it means you’re mine. I want you as my girlfriend, my partner, my mate. I want you by my side. I want you next to me every day and night. I feel like a caveman showing up at your cave. I don’t know what to say, but you are mine and, whether you want me or not, I’m yours.”
Noah frowned for a moment. He was either the worst lover or he was speaking from his heart. He always thought love grew over time, but loving Cora seemed to hit him in the head like a lightning bolt.
She wiggled a few inches away. “I know we’re not kids, but is this too fast? Shouldn’t we think about what we’re running into?”
Noah, always a logical man, figured his brain had died and his heart had taken over.
He tried to let reason rule. “We could date for a year. You could meet my parents. We could plan a wedding. We could date other people.” As he made his list, he could sense Cora’s see you later breakup speech waiting in the corners of his brain.
Only he had never felt so alive. If she ever said those three words to him, he’d crumble.
While he stared at her he pulled another list into his thoughts. All the things he did wrong. Moved too fast. He should have told her how pretty she was, how smart, she was kind. He’d been watching her for three years.
And worst of all, he hadn’t treated her like a lady. Cora was a gentle soul. He should have taken her to a fancy restaurant.
He tried to look into her eyes. “I’m sorry. You’re right. Maybe I should go date wild women until I learn how to treat a lady. Or, lock myself in after dark.” He couldn’t look at her. He started moving away from the only woman he’d ever been crazy about. He had a feeling he’d be addicted to her the rest of his life.
Without a word she relaxed in his arms as he said gently, “We need to sleep now. From this moment I will not feel alive unless you are near.”
Cora whispered against his ear, “Why don’t we begin running toward what we both want? I’m afraid, but if I step away, I will not be able to breathe.”
He held her for a long while as they watched the sunrise. They both knew the world had already changed.
She rested her head on his shoulder. “You are my Noah. You always will be. How could I not love a man who plays Harry Pratt’s detective game of reporting every petty crime and lets the old ladies use your counter as a locker? You let half the town steal coffee. The mailman even brings his own mug so he can steal more.”
He kissed her nose. “My Cora, I’ll stop all that if it bothers you.”
“No, I love you for it. Don’t change a thing.”
He lay back with his eyes closed.
“Are you all right, Noah?” she said.
“Better than all right. You said you loved me. Did you mean it?”
“Yes. Why would I come to listen to my sister so much? I like seeing you and talking to you. I love it when we move to the stacks and talk about the new books.”
“Stop!” he almost shouted. “I love you too. I just can’t believe it. I want us to have a forever kind of love. I’ll never leave you. If you can put up with a sister who complains, and Bear, who wanders off all the time, maybe you can put up with me.”
“Should we tell anyone?”
He shook his head. “I want you all to myself for a while. But I want you to know I won’t change my mind.”
“Me either. I’d like to learn to make love. I’d like eating dinners together and kissing in the stacks when no one is looking. I’d like to sleep with you.”
“You are off to a great start. How about we shower together and start this secret life?”
“I can’t do that. I’ve never . . .”
He laughed. “Me either.”
They grinned at each other. “What an adventure we’ll have,” she said.
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
He felt like he smiled all the way to his toes. “Me too,” he said.