Chapter XIV
Mariam wakes the next morning in her own home for the first time in weeks. A clean, fresh-smelling Sable is sleeping below her on the floor. She smiles and reaches a hand down to gently stroke her hair.
Sable wakes almost immediately at the touch.
She stretches out her arms, giving a long groaning yawn.
Then she turns her head to meet Mariam’s gaze.
One of those rough hands gently cups her cheek, running a thumb over her cheekbone.
Mariam’s smile widens in response, and she kisses Sable on the knuckles. “Good morning, my Sable.”
“Morning, sweet. How do you feel?”
“Not too bad, honestly; I slept well considering… everything.” Mariam stretches her legs with a soft groan, then kisses Sable’s hand again. “I’m glad I don’t feel like I did when I first woke up from whatever he drugged us with, at least.”
“Was it bad?” Sable frowns in concern. Mariam nods.
“It felt like my head was splitting in two and I could barely get my legs to work. I had to use all the magic I could muster just to get on my feet.” Mariam sighs. “At least it’s over now.”
Sable turns away, letting her hand fall. “Is it?” She stands and begins to pace. “What if this happens again, Mariam?”
Mariam scoffs. “What if another mad High Fae decides he’s bent on killing us? I’m sure if there was another Caedren out there, The Champion would still have us at a safehouse.”
“Maybe not that, but my father…” She shakes her head, seeming unwilling to finish the thought. “What if me just being here puts you in constant danger?”
“And what if it doesn’t? And so what if it does?
I just got to see for myself how powerful you are.
And we have allies. If nothing else, I can almost guarantee The Champion would come to our aid again.
” Mariam sits up and lets her eyes follow the path Sable is wearing into the floor.
“We did it once; we can do it again if we have to. I believe in us.” Mariam sticks a foot out to touch her leg, drawing Sable’s attention.
Her eyes are dark, their normally vibrant color glinted out.
Sable sighs, then gets down on her knees in front of Mariam. “I hope you’re right, sweet. I want to believe in us too. I’m just so fucking afraid of losing you.”
Mariam remembers Sable’s story, remembers that she’s already lost everyone else.“You won’t lose me. I’m right here.” Mariam punctuates her words by kissing her forehead. “And I’m not going anywhere.”
“Promise?”
“Yes, of course.” Mariam cocks her head. “Something else is bothering you, isn’t it, Sable? I can tell. There’s more going on.”
Sable bows her head, her fingers wrapping around Mariam’s leg. “Yes. There is something important we need to talk about; something we should’ve talked about sooner, but I’ve been… afraid.”
“Afraid of what, honey? What’s got you scared?” Mariam cups her face with both hands and tilts her head to look up to her. Sable looks genuinely anxious; it does nothing to settle Mariam’s own nerves. “You’re worrying me now.”
Then she’s hit with an odd feeling, one she’s felt with Sable several times before, the same as the feeling that woke her up from Caedren’s sedative. It’s a soft tug in her chest, the sense of a warm summer day, when the sun playfully peeks between the clouds. “Do you feel that, Mariam?”
“That weird sensation in my chest? You know something about it?”
“I do.” Sable lets out a shaky breath. “It’s because we’re mates.”
~§~
Sable watches the war of emotions on Mariam’s face. Confusion, hope, and uncertainty… before she finally speaks. “What the hell does that mean?”
“The Spirits divine an ideal mate for each Fae at birth. Fae struggle to reproduce, and your mate is supposed to be whoever you’re most able to produce children with.
It doesn’t always work this way, but at least in our stories, it’s supposed to be someone uniquely compatible with you, someone you could spend eternity with.
Most Fae aren’t lucky enough to ever connect with their mate.
” Sable squeezes her leg. “Being mated to a human, a human of the same sex no less… I have never even heard of such a thing. Yet, here we are. The connection between us proves it’s possible. ”
Mariam’s expression is still difficult to read. She looks away. “How long have you known?” she asks softly.
“Since the first time we were together carnally. That is what triggers it: sex. I felt it after your orgasm. I… it’s why I just wanted to hold you after.”
“You’ve known that long and didn’t tell me?” Sable’s heart breaks at the hurt in her voice. She chews her lip as she chooses her next words.
“I thought maybe you knew,” Sable says. “It’s how we survived Caedren’s attacks. His poisons should probably have killed us both, but our bond made us stronger than we could be separately.”
“Well, yeah, I felt something,” Mariam replies, “but I had no idea what it was. You could have explained it.”
“I was afraid,” Sable says, looking down. “I thought… you might reject me.”
“And you aren’t worried about that now?”
Sable swallows hard. “I still am. But I realized… I needed to tell you. In case something happens again. In case something… happens to me. I don’t want there to be secrets unspoken.
I don’t want regrets.” Sable cups Mariam’s face and turns her to look at her.
“Mariam, I’m so sorry that I didn’t tell you sooner. I swear.”
“I believe you.” Mariam sighs, running a hand through her own mouse-colored hair. “I just… don’t know what to say. What, exactly, does being mates entail?”
“If we choose to accept each other as mates and undergo the union ritual, we’ll become connected: mind, body, and soul.
We’ll feel all of each other’s emotions, even be able to share thoughts if we focus on it.
We’ll be able to sense the other’s location no matter what.
Our scents will also merge together, meaning others will know we’re mates.
” Sable clears her throat. “Though, maybe not other humans. You don’t have our sense of smell, do you? ”
“No, I imagine not,” Mariam says, sounding perplexed.
“There’s one other thing you should know. Our very lives would become intertwined. If one mate dies, the other does too.”
A look of utter horror crosses Mariam’s face at that. Sable tenses, panic rising, ready for the rejection. Instead, Mariam says, “Most humans don’t live even a hundred years, Sable. If we did this, you’d be cutting your life short.”
Sable actually laughs at that. “No, no, you misunderstand, sweet. I mean, sure, there’s no precedent for a Faeral and a human being mates, but it’s not unusual for High Fae to be mated to minor Fae.
Normally, minor Fae age and die pretty much like humans, but not the ones who are lucky enough to have High Fae as mates.
They stop aging at the moment of the union.
I’m very sure it would work the same for us.
We could spend eternity together, if you wanted. ”
Mariam is silent for a moment. “Eternity?” She has a funny note in her voice, one that Sable can’t quite interpret. But she nods anyway.
“Yes. Faerals still have the lifespans of High Fae, despite what they did to us. We don’t age past maturity. We don’t die unless we’re killed, either by injury or disease. The same would apply to you.”
“I…” She curls her fingers and presses them to her lips. It’s only a few moments that she pauses, but the time passes so slowly. Waiting for her next words is torturous. “I love you, Sable, but I need time to think about this, y’know? This is a lot.”
“I can understand that.” Sable swallows the lump in her throat. “Do you… want time away from me?”
“Don’t be foolish,” Mariam scolds, finally meeting her eyes. “It’s the opposite. I want to be near you more. I want more time to get to know you before I commit to literal eternity with you.” She cocks her head. “Is there a time limit to decide?”
“No. Not at all. It’s pretty normal for Fae to choose to put off the union ritual for centuries, for any number of reasons.
” She pauses, remembering how little Mariam knows about what has been a basic fact of life for her for as long as she can remember.
“Well, I should say that there’s one downside.
Once mates have found each other, even before accepting each other as mates, they can’t enjoy sex with anyone else.
Even if we reject each other completely, that holds unless one of us dies. ”
Mariam’s eyebrows go up at that. “That’s pretty fucked up, Sable. That makes it feel like we don’t actually have a choice to end up with anyone other than each other.”
Sable frowns, looks at the floor, considers her words.
“I understand why you’d feel that way,” she says.
“The Spirits chose you for me centuries before you were even born. If I think about it like that, it’s like I never had any choice in anything that happened to me in my whole life.
The massacre of my clan, my father forcing me to hunt innocent Fae, getting exiled here, this whole nightmare with Caedren…
You could say all of that was fated from the day I was born, just so I’d meet you.
But like I told The Champion, I don’t believe in Fate.
Our lives are what we make them, Mariam.
Even if the Spirits, how do you say, stacked the deck… this is still your choice.”
Mariam blinks. “I’m not sure what to say.”
Sable reaches up and runs the backs of her fingers down Mariam’s cheek, marveling at her soft skin. “Are you upset with me, Mariam?”
“A little.” Mariam shakes her head. “But I can understand why you didn’t tell me earlier. It makes sense you’d be slow to trust. To feel safe with me. But no more secrets. Is that understood?”
“No more secrets. I can handle that.” Sable smiles and kisses Mariam’s leg gently.