Chapter Ten
Kull
My stomach churned when I heard Siv’s voice. I gritted my teeth and rose to my feet, as did Typhon. For the moment we had to ignore Ambrosia’s words, although she had given me a lot to think about. Of course, Typhon was going to deny everything because he didn’t want to think that the precious Alpha could ever do anything wrong, or that they were treating us unfairly. He still believed we were playing by the same rules as them, when we were playing a different game entirely.
“Go away, Siv,” Typhon and I cried out in unison. He ignored us and took our words as an invitation to come in. He swept away the blanket and strode into our alcove. He was bigger than us, always had been. Seeing him made tension prickle beneath my skin. My thoughts were filled with memories of him hitting us over and over again, taunting us for not being the warriors we were supposed to be. He used his superior strength to belittle us, always reminding people that we were failed experiments. His mocking laugh often echoed around my mind, haunting me in my nightmares. I could still taste the metallic tang of blood that his fists always caused.
“That’s no way to greet an old friend,” he said, spreading out his arms. It didn’t take long for me to realize that he wasn’t here for us, as his gaze quickly fell upon Ambrosia; and he became intrigued immediately. “I heard about your little plea to Vance. It’s funny that you keep trying to make this happen, when it’s never going to. You should be happy with your lot in life.”
“We don’t need you to tell us that, Siv,” Typhon said.
“You don’t know what you need. That’s always been your problem. So, this is the human,” he said, ignoring Typhon and approaching Ambrosia. She stiffened with fear, and I started towards her, not wanting Siv to take liberties. He touched her hair and looked her up and down. “What a fine specimen she is. You’re not completely without your uses, are you,” he murmured. “I think there’s a lot we could learn.”
“Vance doesn’t think so,” I said.
“Sometimes he can’t see the true potential of things. I could imagine many uses…” he trailed away, and the implication of his words made me sick. They had the same effect on Ambrosia as well, who looked towards me for help. I sidled up to them and glared at Siv.
“It doesn’t matter what you can imagine because we found her. We brought her back here. She’s ours.”
Siv laughed. “Have you already forgotten that whatever you bring here is for the pack? You don’t deserve to have belongings. You especially do not deserve a prize such as this. You wouldn’t know what to do with her anyway, or how to appreciate her properly. No, I think it’s best if I take her off your hands,” he took Ambrosia’s wrist. As he did so, I stepped forward and hissed at him.
“Get your hands off her,” I said, feeling a protective and possessive instinct surging through me. Siv arched an eyebrow.
“Are we really going to do this dance again? I’ll take what I want, or do you need to be reminded of what happened when we were younger?”
“She is ours by right, Siv,” Typhon said, flanking Siv. “If you want to try and take her you will be breaking the rules of the pack. You may not think we have any rights, but are you willing to put that to the test?”
Siv narrowed his eyes and gazed at us in turn. Eventually he let go of Ambrosia’s wrist. “I will speak with Vance, and you will be left in no doubt about your rights,” he hissed. “Perhaps you could use a timely reminder about your role in this pack. I shall return, so keep her safe,” he jabbed a finger towards Ambrosia and spoke as though he already owned her. Then, he turned on his heels and marched out of the alcove.
Typhon and I cursed at him.
“Who was that?” Ambrosia asked.
“An old childhood friend,” Typhon replied ironically.
“He used to beat us. He wanted to prove to everyone that we weren’t better than other wolves. He did so time and time again,” I added.
“He never gave us any peace.”
Fear flickered on Ambrosia’s face, and I could tell that she was terrified about what he might do to her. “We won’t let him take you,” I said gently. Typhon turned towards her and added to my words. “You are here because of us, and we will not let anyone take you. You don’t have to worry about Siv.”
“Good, that just leaves me with a hundred other things to worry about. Can’t you see that I’m not made for this life?” she pleaded but her words fell on deaf ears. We weren’t going to let her leave. We couldn’t. That would make us seem even weaker than we already were.
“I’m hungry,” Typhon announced. He left to fetch us some meat. I could see hope flit across Ambrosia’s face, but it was only fleeting.
“You thought we were going to leave you alone here, didn’t you?” I said.
“It crossed my mind. I suppose it was too much to ask.”
“We are not fools, even if we are treated as such,” I muttered.
She studied me for a few moments. The way her shimmering green eyes stared at me made my heart thrum powerfully. I thought of how sweet she tasted, how wild her passion had been, and I wondered if we would be able to share something like that with her again.
“You understand what I’m saying, don’t you? About your past. You can see things in a different way to Typhon.” The more she spoke, the more it became clear that she was not bluffing about her skills. The insight she possessed was alarming. It was as though she could see into my very thoughts.
“Typhon has always been blinded by his ambition to become what they wanted us to be. He takes it as a personal failing that we are treated as we are. He believes that if we can prove ourselves to them then things will change. I know they won’t, because it doesn’t matter what we do. They will always see us the same way.”
“That’s a mature way to approach things. You can never define yourself by what other people think, because what they want is arbitrary and even when you think you’ve done what you need to do, they shift their expectations and suddenly you have an entirely new problem.”
I nodded, feeling pleased that I could gain her respect like this. “Unfortunately, Typhon cannot seem to grasp this no matter how much I tell him. He clings to this idea that one day we will be given a small pack to command and that people will respect us. Sometimes I think it’s the only thing that keeps him sane.”
“What makes you different?” she asked. The question took me by surprise.
“What do you mean?”
“You and Typhon are so similar, especially in appearance. You were born together, presumably bred from the same genetic material. But experiences shape people differently. People can go through exactly the same event, and yet come out of it different people. You don’t seem to hold Vance or the rest of the pack in the same reverence as Typhon does. So why is that? I noticed how you reacted when Typhon mentioned someone, a woman. Who was she?”
I scowled as she hit her target. There was something unerring about her words. I clasped my hands together and began to pace around the alcove.
“You might as well tell me, Kull. At best I can help and at worst it kills time and fills the silence,” she said. I remained silent for the moment. “If it helps, I’ll tell you something about myself.”
I stopped pacing and stared at her. She had an earnest look in her eyes. I supposed there was no harm speaking about it considering that it was old news.
“Her name is Hana. You saw her today with Vance.”
“The one who struck me?” Ambrosia lifted her hand to her cheek as she asked this question.
I nodded. “Indeed. We grew up together. She was different from the others. She used to smile at me. When we were alone, we would share things together. As we grew older, we used to run into the forest and steal moments together. Things seemed wonderful. I used to tell her about how things used to be for us, and how I wished that they could be different. She told me that it didn’t always have to be this way. She held my hand. She kissed me. I fell in love. I thought that everything was going to be fine as long as we could be together. She was the one person I trusted other than Typhon, but she hurt me.”
“What did she do?” Ambrosia asked.
“She asked me to meet her near a waterfall. She said that it was going to be special, that she wanted to share something precious with me. She told me to wait for her naked. I rushed out and sat on a rock near the waterfall. I could feel the spray of water on my back. I waited and waited, until Hana appeared. She wasn’t alone. She had brought other wolves, Siv among them. They pointed and laughed at me, humiliating me. They said I was stupid for ever believing that a real wolf would want to sully themselves by being with me and they parroted some of the secrets I had told Hana. From the very beginning it had been a lie. Everything we shared and spoke about had all been some ploy to taunt me. I confessed my heart to Hana, but she had never been interested in me. She had been put up to it by the others. It was just another way for them to bully us.”
“That’s horrible,” she gasped.
I closed my eyes. I hadn’t thought about this acute pain for a long time. “That’s when I realized something that Typhon never has. This pack is cruel and they’re never ever going to see us as equals. We are always going to be lesser to them. There’s no coming back from being treated like that.”
“So why do you stay?” she asked.
“This is our home. We have nowhere else to go and if we did leave how would that look to Vance? They would chase us down and, finally, they would have a reason to attack us without holding anything back. It would be a death sentence.”
Ambrosia had a troubled look on her face. “I’m sorry Kull. I really am. Hearing what you and Typhon have been through… nobody should ever have to go through that.”
“Even though we captured you?” I asked. The corner of her mouth was tugged into a slight smile.
“Part of my job is having empathy for people no matter what. I think you and Typhon need to ask yourselves what you really hope to accomplish, and what shape you want your lives to take. Nobody has to spend their life in misery. Only you have the power to change things for the better and you have a responsibility to yourself to make it happen. Nobody else is going to do it for you.”
I thought about her words carefully and found wisdom in them, although I wasn’t yet convinced that it was possible for things to change.
“Tell me about the man who was with you,” I asked. Ambrosia gnawed her lower lip and looked a little shaken.
“There’s not much to tell,” she spoke meekly and averted her gaze.
“He was not your mate?” I asked, frowning. I wasn’t displeased by this notion as anyone who would leave her like that was unworthy of her.
She laughed dryly. “Certainly not. No, let’s put him down to a mistake. I just had an idea that… well… I thought I could let off some steam. I thought he could give me something I needed. Instead, I found it somewhere else,” her voice dropped to a sultry tone and there was a warmth to her eyes. She referred to the things that we had done together. Heat bristled beneath my skin as I remembered the way her lips felt as they were locked around me, how her body glistened with sweat and looked as beautiful as the world when it was drenched in morning dew. I turned my body towards her, feeling tension crackle in the air. Her breathing was shallow. I could smell the fear on her, but it was mixed with something else, a look of yearning in her eyes. I came closer to her.
“For a human you are attractive,” I growled. There were rampant feelings inside me that had not been indulged as often as I would have liked. They pulsed within, hammering against my heart and making me feel as though I was going to explode if I didn’t experience them again. Hana had driven me crazy. I didn’t believe we were brought into this world alone. I craved the touch of another just as fiercely as Typhon craved respect.
There was something about Ambrosia that awoke something within. The way she gained insight in my mind made it feel as though she truly knew me, and I appreciated the way she empathized with our situation. It was hard not to be drawn in by the flaming strands of hair that lay against her milky skin, or the green eyes that promised so much allure. My gaze was drawn down to her breasts, which were barely contained in the tight fabric of her clothes. Beauty and arousal poured out of her and to my mind she would have been wasted on a human male. My lips curled as we came closer and closer. Then, I reached out and ran my fingers through her hair. She did not recoil. It was brave of her to give herself to wolves. I could see the longing in her eyes. I could feel the way she trembled with desire and all I could think about was how much I wanted to give in to her.
I pulled her close and kissed her madly, losing myself in her intoxicating taste. It was sweet and overwhelming, flooding into my mouth as our tongues warred together. I closed my eyes, and I was able to forget my surroundings and my troubles. There was only her, soft and adoring, with a wild streak that was most uncommon for her kind.