18. But You Will
EIGHTEEN
But You Will
Harry
I t was unsurprising when Harry woke up the next day, he saw Lillian’s head on his shoulder, and he knew she was already awake.
It had been so long, he gave himself a selfish moment to savor the feel of waking up with a beautiful woman pressed to him in bed. To feel her softness. Smell her scent. Support her weight.
In the night, they’d moved only so he’d fallen to his back and she’d cuddled to his side, but their legs were still tangled, and he had his arm around her, she had hers resting along his stomach.
This was probably why she sensed him awake and tipped her head back.
“Hey,” she said softly.
He turned to his side and into her.
“Hey,” he replied.
“Sleep okay?” she queried.
He nodded.
“Worth me wasting breath to ask if you did?” he inquired.
“Not really,” she mumbled.
“Honey,” he whispered.
“Though, it’s been an enjoyable few hours, watching the sunrise illuminate your chest,” she quipped. “You’re pretty built, Sheriff Moran.”
The position of the sun was a problem.
He’d slept in.
Harry didn’t mention that. “That’s good, since I work hard at it.”
“I can tell.”
He smiled at her.
“You make plans with Ronetta today?” he asked after what he overheard in snippets the evening before.
“Yeah,” she said. “I have a couple of clients coming into town this weekend. Ronnie’s coming with me to do a little tidying at their places. Then Jenna needs help at one of her greenhouses, so we’re going to go over there.”
This was the Lillian he was getting to know. She preferred to be busy.
“Want me over tonight?” he asked.
She gave him a squeeze. “Yes, please.”
“Then I’ll be over tonight.”
Her expression turned thoughtful. “Maybe I should go to you. Even pooches think that Daddy is better than any filet mignon.”
“If you’re cool with it, I can bring them here.”
He knew the answer. She’d already invited them. He just didn’t remind her why they didn’t come.
But he was surprised at how her eyes lit up. It wasn’t her usual blinding radiance, but he’d take it.
“That’d be awesome,” she agreed.
He nestled her closer before he had to say, “I can tell by the position of the sun I’m running late, so I need to get going.”
“It’s good work is only a five-minute walk away, then,” she replied.
This was something interesting to consider, and blindsiding him, Harry found himself considering it.
He didn’t live far from the department. Fifteen minutes, if traffic was good. Twenty if it was tourist season or the equivalent of rush hour in Misted Pines.
But twenty to thirty extra minutes in any day was a boon.
Lillian took him out of his thoughts when she made a move, saying, “I’ll go first in the bathroom so I can brush my teeth, then make you coffee.”
He kept her where she was.
When her gaze landed on his, he ordered, “You stay here and try to sleep more.”
“Harry,” she said quietly. “I’ll never get back to sleep, and I’m better when I’ve got something to do. Let me make you coffee. And toast? Maybe some eggs?”
Since he already knew this about her, he acquiesced. “Something in my stomach would be good.”
She nodded, moved in for a swift kiss, then she rolled out of bed.
Harry didn’t.
He used that time to fully take in her space. The wanton femininity of it. The muted floral pattern of the curtains at the window. The ornate gilt on the small vintage mirror on the wall. Not one but two dried flower arrangements on the white chest that served as her bedside table. The big, soft spray of the massive dry bouquet in its creamy pot on the windowsill. The elegant sweep of wispy white drapes that hung on the wall at the sides of the headboard to frame the bed.
The soft sheets.
The plethora of pillows.
Lillian made every inch of her space… Lillian .
It was her, so easy to look at, so pleasing to the eye, you missed how much work she put into making it what it was.
Harry was a guy. He didn’t want to worry about taking off his boots or smoothing a bedspread just right.
But somehow he knew he’d break his back to keep what Lillian made Lillian just as it was supposed to be.
On this thought, he heard her call, “I’m out,” and he knew the bathroom was free.
He rolled out of bed.
Rus hadn’t only packed Harry’s toothbrush, paste and floss, he packed his shampoo, shower wash, shaver and comb.
Definitely a deft hand with a go bag.
Harry took his uniform and an extra pair of skivvies to the bathroom, did his morning thing, dressed, left his bathroom stuff where it was, took his pajamas back to the duffle, shoved everything in, pinned on his badge and tucked his pens in his breast pocket, grabbed his boots and duffle and walked out.
He dumped his stuff by the couch and moved to the kitchen.
Lillian had a mug waiting for him by the coffeemaker.
He claimed it, took a sip and headed to where she was scrambling cheesy eggs at the stove. There was a plate with buttered toast at the ready.
“Looks good,” he said.
“I like that you’re here and I get to cook for you.”
Harry accepted that velvet blow gladly.
She tipped her head back to look up at him. “But I’m going to lose my feminist card having said that, so don’t tell anybody.”
“Are you a feminist?” he asked.
She appeared confused. “Well…yeah.”
He smiled at her. “Don’t worry, sweetheart. I liked you at my place so I could cook for you too. All equal.”
“ Shoo ,” she joked.
He kissed the side of her head.
She let him, then took the skillet off the burner and scraped all the eggs on the plate by the toast.
“None for you?” he asked.
She handed him the plate and reached for her mug. “I’m just going to have toast.”
He didn’t argue, it wasn’t the time. And anyway, Ronetta would soon be in the picture, the handoff complete, and she would look after their girl.
He took his food to the table. Lillian came with him.
He ate. She sipped coffee.
He used that time again to savor. Savor having someone close as you went about your morning. Savor sitting at a table eating while she sipped her coffee. Savor the fall of her hair on her shoulders and the way her cardigan had slipped off one.
But Harry knew this was something else for her, having him there.
And he savored that too.
She waited until he was done and washing it down with the last of his joe before she asked, “When can I get them back?”
He reached out and took her hand before he told her about the rest of the conversation he had with Lynda.
“The police have processed everything they need to process, and they’ll be released within twenty-four to forty-eight hours. The minute we get word, I’ll be dispatching Wade Dickerson, one of my best deputies, to go get them.”
Wet trembled at the edges of her eyes, as did her voice, when she said, “Thanks, Harry.”
“They’re also investigating this.”
“Okay.”
“We’ll be giving them everything we have, and we’ll be investigating here.”
She nodded.
“And I have Jason and Jesse Bohannan in Idaho. They’ll be turning over rocks too.”
Her brows slid up. “Cade Bohannan’s boys?”
“Yes. They’re private investigators. Sometimes, they work as consultants with my crew.”
That last wasn’t a lie, it was just that it wasn’t the department that was going to pay their invoices this time.
“I hear about cold cases being solved these days,” she fished.
His hold on her tightened. “I’m not going to encourage you to hope, I’m also not going to tell you there is no hope. What I’m going to say is that sixteen years puts law enforcement at a significant disadvantage, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible.”
She studied him a beat before she said, “Thank you for being honest.”
“Always.”
“Can I be needy for a second?” she requested.
He moved his hand so their fingers were laced together and chided, “You’re not being needy, honey. This is as serious as shit can get. Just tell me what you need, and I’ll do what I can to give it to you.”
He watched her fight to control her emotion, before she said, “Okay, then, can you pack heavy and bring a ton of dog food? I don’t…” She popped her head to the side like she got a sudden pain in her neck before she finished, “It’s soothing, having you around.”
“And you want to be home.”
“I want to be in our home.”
He knew what she meant.
“You didn’t move into their room,” he whispered.
“I haven’t touched their room,” she whispered back.
Goddamn it.
Honed her talents with denial.
Knowing this, Harry mentally pledged to keep an eye on her. She was like a prey animal, adept at hiding vulnerability.
“I’m here as long as you need me.”
“Thanks, Harry.” She was still whispering.
He got up and moved to her, savoring again while he watched her tilt her head back as he bent low to touch his mouth to hers.
“I gotta get going,” he said, wishing he didn’t, but important shit had to get done, and with the most important of it, they’d already lost sixteen years. They couldn’t lose another day.
“Do you want me to make you another coffee in a travel mug?” Lillian offered.
“No, Polly will have an Aromacobana for me.”
“Okay.”
“I’ll check in during the day.”
“You don’t have?—”
“It’ll be to look in on you, but mostly it’ll be for me.”
She studied him for another few beats then said, “Stuff happens to you that really sucks, at the same time stuff happens that’s really awesome. It’s confusing, but whatever. Thanks for being so awesome, Harry.”
“I don’t think you’re getting this,” he told her.
“What?” she asked.
He didn’t answer.
He said, “But you will.”
He gave her another kiss, then went to put on his boots. He grabbed his duffle. Returned for one last kiss and a “See you later.”
He waited for her eyes to warm at his words, and only then did he walk out the door.
He didn’t saunter to the station. In fact, it took effort to stop himself from jogging.
Polly met him at reception.
She handed him his coffee.
He handed her his duffle and requested, “Can you drop that in my office?”
“Sure thing, Harry. How is she?”
“Demolished, but getting on with it.”
“That’s Sonny and Avery,” Polly mumbled and bustled away.
Harry went direct to Rus’s desk, their eyes locked the short journey.
“Wanna take a field trip?” he asked his detective.
“Where we goin’?” Rus returned.
“I’m feeling a convo with Leland Dern.”
Slowly, Rus smiled.