Chapter Twenty-six
Panic claws at me the second my back hits the mattress, and it takes everything in me not to scurry away from Sy’s probing gaze.
“Look at me,” he commands.
I do; I watch him slowly undress and as long as I can see his eyes, I’m okay. But even for the brief moment his face is obscured when he bends to push his pants down, is enough to send my panic skyrocketing again.
“Sawyer,” I plead.
“Yes, sweet bunny?” he rasps.
I don’t know what I’m asking for, so I don’t continue talking. Instead, I greedily run my eyes all over his gloriously naked body. From the top of his head, his intense eyes, chiseled jaw, and the way the ends of his hair caress his shoulders. Then I shamelessly ogle his broad chest, his dark, peaked nipples, the grooves and hard lines on his torso. The dark line of hair leading from his navel and down to the enticing V that’s pointing to his hard cock. Precum glistens on the purple tip, making it all shiny and tasty looking.
Without meaning to, I lick my lips. “Like what you see?” he asks, amusement dancing in his eyes.
“Yes,” I croak.
“Mhmm, me too, wife. Me fucking too.” He moves closer, slowly sitting down beside me rather than between my legs. “I love the way you shudder when I kiss you here.” His lips graze the column of my neck.
Slowly, he licks his way down to my tit. “Sawyer,” I moan as he sucks my nipple into his hot, wet mouth.
“I love the way you moan my name when I lick your nipple,” he rasps, moving over to the other one. My back bows off the bed as he closes his teeth around it. “And when I bite it.”
He continues to lick a fiery trail down my body until he reaches my mound. Rubbing his nose against it, he inhales sharply. “I can smell your arousal. Are you ready for me to eat you out?”
Each caress, lick, kiss, and nip, has made my fear dissipate, and as I lie there, panting beneath him, I want nothing more than his mouth on my pussy. “Y-yes.”
The way he made his way down my body has him almost lying upside-down, his ass is near my tits, so he isn’t between my legs. I want to tell him to crawl between my parted legs, but I don’t. I want to see where this is going.
Running my hand along his muscular back, I close it around the nape of his neck. “Do it,” I hiss, squeezing slightly.
Not needing to be told twice, Sy rubs my clit with his nose, making me moan loudly. When I buck, using my body to beg for more, he places his hands on my thighs, firmly holding them wide. Then he licks across the seam of my swollen pussy lips.
“Don’t tease me,” I whine, too horny to care how desperate I sound.
“Don’t rush me, sweet bunny. I want to savor your delicious cunt.”
Oh, fuck. Those words and the gravel in his tone make my inner walls clench, and I’m panting harder. “P-please…” I lose the ability to speak when he hardens his tongue and thrusts it into me. I reach for his hair, tangling my fingers into the mess while pressing him harder to me.
It doesn’t take long before I’m crying out his name, begging for his cock. “Please, Sy. Fill me. I need… fuck! I need your cock.” He doesn’t relent, licking my opening until I scream out his name, shuddering underneath him.
“I’m gonna lick your cum from your cunt, wife. Then I’ll fuck you until you can’t walk for days.” The deep timbre of his tone amps up my pleasure, and I’m on the cusp of asking him to stay down there when he greedily licks at my opening.
“Wait,” I pant. “Do it properly, Sy. I want you to eat me out with your head buried between my thighs.”
“My head is between your legs,” he replies before swiping his tongue over my clit.
I pull at his hair and use my arm to nudge him in the side at the same time. “You know what I mean,” I huff. “Please? I want to know what it’s like with you.”
He lets go of me and sits up, moving so he’s hovering above me with his legs around me rather than between mine. Making it look like he’s caging me in. He rests his weight on his arms and lowers himself until our bodies touch. “Are you certain?” When I nod, he growls, “Use your words, baby.”
“I-I’m certain.” I hate how unsure I sound when I’m in fact not. Sure, I’m scared, but that has everything to do with my past and nothing to do with my present. “Do it.”
Before I can verbalize my need again, he leans in to capture my lips with his. His tongue is merciless and persistent as it’s seeking mine, parting my lips, and granting him access immediately. I moan as I taste myself on his tongue.
Shifting, he places his hand on my side, slowly trailing up toward my chest. I arch my back, pushing my tits forward, causing a delicious friction when his chest meets them. Eagerly anticipating his touch, I’m getting frustrated when he keeps moving so slowly.
“Please,” I beg into his mouth.
Before I can ask again, he kisses his way across my jaw and down my neck. I squeeze my thighs together, trying to create some friction to satisfy the need for him.
“None of that,” he commands as he forces one of his legs in between mine. I whimper in protest, but it doesn’t do me any good. Lowering his head to my tit, he licks the areola, making me writhe beneath him. Moving my hands to his head, I let my fingers play with his hair. He starts moving down my body toward my pubic bone, and I’m practically trembling with anticipation of what I know is to come.
One of his hands cups my pussy, and I can hear his sharp intake of breath when he finds me soaking. “You’re even wetter now, sweet bunny,” he grits out before tracing a single finger through my wet folds. I lean up on my elbows so I can see the top of his head, which is now between my legs. He gently kisses the inside of both my thighs before running his face across my mound. “Mhmm, you’re so brave, baby.” The words make everything in me clench, both in fear and excitement, but before I can prepare myself fully, I feel his warm tongue licking between my folds all the way to my clit.
“Oh fuck,” I moan out loud and throw my head back. His dark and sexy chuckle reaches my ears.
With soft kisses, Sy slowly kisses up my left leg, making his way back to my needy core. When he starts licking slowly around my clit, I can barely keep myself upright. I still wanna see him, but the sensations each flick of his tongue sends through my body make it too difficult. I finally give up and sink back into the mattress with a loud moan, just as he pushes a finger into me.
“How are you feeling, bunny?”
Feeling? Oh, right. I realize that his words help me relax, assuring me it’s him between my thighs while reminding me I want this. “I-I’m good,” I rasp.
“Good?” he mocks. “I’m doing a piss poor job if you’re only good.”
Without meaning to, I burst out laughing. “I’m perfectly fine, Sy. It helps that you’re talking to me.”
Every time it feels like the orgasm is just within reach, he blows on my sex and it retreats once again. I’m a panting mess switching between cursing him out and begging for more. The smug fucker just keeps promising me it’ll be worth the wait.
“S-stop. No more. I have to… I want to…” I curse him out when he once again robs me of the pleasure I’m so desperate for. His dark chuckle lets me know that he knows exactly what he’s doing and that he’s entirely too pleased with himself.
“Baby, you’re so wet for me. Your pretty cunt is all glistening and swollen.” His husky voice sends shivers through me, and I instinctively want to squeeze my legs together. But with him mercilessly eating me out, I can’t.
“Yes,” I moan. I don’t know if I’m agreeing with him or reacting to the way his tongue works my clit. When Sy inserts a second finger into my dripping heat, my hips lift of their own accord, but he puts his other hand on my pubic bone to keep me down. “Fu-fuck, more, I need more, Sy.”
“What do you need more of, sweet bunny?”
His hoarse voice sends shivers through my body, and I try to answer him, but I’m unable to do anything but pant and writhe as he continues his slow assault on my needy nub. As he once again steals my orgasm from me, I cry out in frustration.
“I need you,” I scream, desperate and so fucking horny.
It feels like my arousal is seeping from my pussy, and I wouldn’t be surprised if his face is drenched in my juices, especially not with how long he’s spent down there. I have no idea what time it is, but I know it feels like he’s spent hours tormenting me.
Curving the fingers deep inside me while sucking my swollen nub into his mouth, I’m unable to hold back anymore. “Sy!” I cry out as the most intense orgasm I’ve ever had crashes through me, and I feel his tongue inside my pussy as I spasm around him. I don’t know when he replaced his fingers with his tongue, only that it feels fucking amazing.
My entire body feels like mush. I’m entirely too spent to move so I still can’t see him, but I feel him giving my pussy one more lick from top to bottom, before he kisses his way back up my body, making sure that almost no area of my hypersensitive flesh is left without his lips grazing it. When he reaches my lips, I can taste myself on him.
“We’re definitely doing that again,” I say, grinning lazily.
“I’m so proud of you, baby,” he rasps. “And you’ve never looked more beautiful than when you came all over my face just now.”
Pride shines in his eyes, and I think I fall even more in love with my amazing husband. He’s everything I never knew I needed, but that I now know I can’t live without. When I’m weak, he doesn’t overpower me. He lends me some of his strength, helping me stand on my own. And the fact that he just helped me… I don’t know what to call it. We didn’t rewrite history, and we didn’t erase the past. But together, we created something beautiful.
“I love you so fucking much,” I murmur.
“Now and always,” he replies, grinning down at me.
Pushing myself up, I gently bite his bottom lip. “Now get your perfect cock inside me, Sy. Fill my pussy up.”
I reach down, cupping his rock hard dick. Then I wrap my hand around the base of his smooth shaft. “Sweet bunny.” He squeezes his eyes closed as I cradle his balls with my other hand.
“Fuck me hard, husband,” I demand in a sultry tone.
Sy doesn’t speak, just leans down and kisses me again. It’s a toe-curling kiss that says more than he ever could with words. It makes me feel… I don’t even know how to describe how he makes me feel. All I know is that I wish I could freeze this moment between us. He looks at me as if I am his entire world, which is exactly how I feel about him.
The freedom I’ve craved for so long means nothing if I don’t get to share it with him. I still need to tell him more about the Senate. I didn’t get to it earlier as we got a bit… distracted.
Home is wherever he is, and I want this with him. I want to love him with my body.
Sy pulls me out of my head as he removes both my hands from his crotch and lets out a shuddering breath. When I look at him, he must sense my confusion because he hurries to explain himself. “I won’t make it inside you if you keep touching my dick. Seeing you come like that almost made me nut without being inside your sweet cunt.”
I do as he says and lie back down. Unable to keep the satisfied grin off of my face. Sy lowers himself to rest on his elbows. His lips are so close I could reach out to lick them, with his breath tickling me on every exhale. Feeling the head of his cock at my entrance, I lift my hips and spread my legs wider.
Claiming my lips once more, I almost don’t notice he is moving his hips ever so slowly, inching himself into me. I gasp at the welcome intrusion, and I lock my ankles behind his ass to give him better access.
Sy’s hands are trailing through my hair, his lips on mine as our tongues wrap around each other, locked in a heated dance. I feel my pussy stretch, making room for his dick to slide further into me.
“More,” I moan, high on the feeling.
Whispering heated words to me about how good I feel around him, Sy’s rough hands make their way to my heavy tits, and he begins kneading them. I feel the rush of lust taking over my body again.
“You still with me, sweet bunny?” I’m about to answer him when he rolls his hips, making me lose my words in a moan.
The way he feels inside me now is so fucking good. He starts thrusting into me more eager, and I tilt my hips up, taking him in even deeper, as I’m moaning out his name in sheer pleasure.
Taking a shuddering breath, Sy stops moving his hips, lowering his face to my tit, and softly licks and nibbles on my peaked bud. Tangling my hands in his long hair, I hold him as close to me as possible, moaning unashamedly.
When he reaches between us and finds my sensitive nerve bundle, my back arches off the bed, and my core squeezes him again, my legs tighter around him. I use my feet to try and get him even deeper, but since he’s already balls deep, that’s not really a possibility. Sy continues to play with my clit, and I feel the pleasure building within me.
“I’m gonna come,” I pant. My hands are on his back and I’m digging my nails into his flesh, fully focused on all the sensations I’m feeling.
As my orgasm crests, I pull his face back to mine, wasting no time in claiming his lips with my own. Our tongues tangle, and I’m panting hard into his mouth.
Once my core is no longer squeezing him as tight, he pumps his hips again. Still keeping a finger on my clit, I’m feeling so sore I can no longer tell the pleasure from the pain. “Don’t… it’s too sore, I need…” I don’t know what the fuck I need or what I’m even asking for. “Fuck me harder, Sy.”
Immediately answering my demand, he picks up the pace. Pulling almost all the way out of me, before slamming back inside. The burn he leaves in his wake is delicious, and I crave it as much as my next breath.
“I’m not going to last much longer, wife, you feel too amazing wrapped around me.”
His gravelly voice shoots straight to my center, and I involuntarily clench around him again. The deep and heavy groans falling from his mouth cause me to shiver while I fuse my mouth to his, wanting to taste the ecstasy on his lips.
Sy flicks my clit twice before I’m coming on his dick again. My pussy clenches around his hardness as I’m riding my pleasure. “Sweet bunny!” The way he groans my nickname, like a breathy plea, makes my inner walls flutter again. I feel him pump into me twice more before his cock jerks, and I feel the hot evidence of his release deep inside me.
“I love you so much.” I’m almost afraid to speak above a whisper, not wanting to ruin this perfect moment between us. Instead of giving him time to answer, I slant my lips to his, slowly stroking his tongue with mine and basking in the afterglow of what we just did. To say it felt right would be an understatement.
Sy breaks the kiss and collapses next to me on the bed. “The bed looks like a fucking crime scene,” he chuckles breathlessly.
I push myself up on my elbows and look around. He’s right. There is blood all over the sheets, and both our bodies. “Oops,” I laugh, running my fingers up and down the cut on my arm. “Guess we got carried away.”
Instead of laughing, Sy cups my cheek and turns my head so I have to look at him. “You’d tell me if you weren’t alright, right, bunny?”
“Don’t,” I hiss in warning. When he furrows his brows in confusion, I keep on talking. “Don’t ruin this by second-guessing me. Not when… not when I’m high on what we did. Not when I, for the first time ever, feel like my past isn’t defining me.”
I don’t know if my words make sense to him, but I can’t explain it any differently. That’s how I feel, and I don’t want him to put a damper on it even if he means well.
His eyes darken and he runs a hand through his unruly hair. Some of it still gathered in a messy semblance of a bun slash ponytail, but most of it has escaped. “I’ll never stop worrying about you, my sweet bunny. Never.”
“I guess I can live with that,” I say, doing my best to sound put out. Though the smile splitting my mouth in two ruins it.
Chuckling, Sy gets up and walks toward the bathroom. “Let’s get cleaned up,” he suggests. “And then we’ll get something to eat.”
I follow him to the bathroom, and while the shower runs, I shoot him a playful smile. “How can you be hungry when you just ate?”
Thank God Sy’s shower has multiple showerheads so we don’t have to wait for each other. It’s totally handy when we’re as dirty as we are. While wetting my hair, I watch as our blood mixes with the water and disappears into the drain. It feels symbolic, somehow. Like we’re washing away the past.
“What can I say, I need my food to keep up with you,” he laughs. It takes me a second to remember he’s answering my question from before we got under the water spray.
Even though I’m tempted to initiate another round of amazing orgasms, I focus on washing my hair and body. When we’re both done, we towel dry before seeing to our cuts. Neither of them are deep enough to need anything but some antibacterial ointment and bandages, which he keeps under the sink.
Afterward, I get dressed in one of his team t-shirts, but don’t put on any underwear. He puts on underwear but nothing else. Together we almost make one somewhat dressed person. Then we order Chinese food and lounge in the living room while we wait for it to be delivered.
The delivery guy does a double-take when Sy opens the door and even asks for his autograph. While Sy grumbles about privacy and just wanting to eat, I laugh loudly.
“Come feed me,” I call when the delivery guy keeps going on and on about Sy’s games.
I almost regret interrupting, because I like how awed the guy sounds. But I’m hungry, dammit. Besides, tonight isn’t just any other night; it’s special, magical almost. Getting up, I return to the bedroom, throwing drawers open while I look for things with the Sabertooths logo on it.
“Here,” I say, holding out a jersey and a cap for the young guy. “Take these.”
The guy’s eyes widen. “Really?” he asks, excitement making his voice high pitched.
“Really,” I smile. Then I hand Sy the pen I found and gesture toward the items. “Come find me once you’ve signed those.”
It doesn’t take Sy long to get rid of the guy, and when he does, he finds me waiting in the kitchen. “I should spank you for letting him see you like that.” He points at my bare legs before swatting my ass.
I squeal playfully. “If you’re good, I might let you do it later,” I laugh, waggling my eyebrows.
This behavior is so unlike me, but I can’t stop. Knowing that Sy doesn’t just know everything, but is still here, is making me giddy.
After dishing up the food we snuggle up in the living room. There’s no TV or music on, we’re alone with our thoughts, and I like it. It’s not awkward or forced. It’s comfortable and really nice.
I’ve just claimed the last egg roll when Sy says, “You never told me about the scars on your thighs, baby.”
The bite I’ve just taken gets lodged in my throat, making me choke violently. My eyes water and I reach for the wine I poured while waiting for him to join me. “W-what?” I croak, swiping the tears from my eyes.
Sy leans back, and I take the opportunity to stretch my legs across his. “I can wait if you’re not ready to tell me,” he clarifies.
I shake my head. “No, it’s fine. I wasn’t not going to tell you. It just didn’t feel right earlier.” Taking a deep breath, I ready myself for telling him. “Fabian liked to mix his punishments and rewards together. He said it was his way to balance the scales, to even things out so we didn’t linger on the past too long.”
Sy’s eyes stay on mine, and though I want to look away, I can’t. His dark orbs are like magnets keeping mine in place.
“Twice, he said I deserved his mouth on my… on me. But he also wanted to punish me for displeasing him. I don’t even know what I had done wrong and right, all I remember is the pain. There was never any pleasure. He didn’t… umm… lick my clit. He bit it, used it to keep me still while he sliced into my skin.”
I startle as the glass table suddenly breaks, sharp shards of glass spraying everywhere. Blinking, I look up at Sy, who’s standing in the middle of the carnage. It feels like my thoughts are moving in slow motion, and it takes me several moments to remember I was talking to him, not reliving the horrible memories by myself.
“I’ll fucking kill him.”
Red, hot fury rolls off Sawyer in potent waves that threaten to pull me under. No, that’s not right. Sy would never do that to me, so if anything, his anger is bringing me closer to him and further from my family.
I get up, careful not to step on any glass. Then I reach for Sy and he uses his bare feet to kick some shards away before coming to my side. “You can’t kill Fabian—”
“The fuck I can’t,” he spits. “He’s fucking nothing. It wouldn’t even be much of a fight.” His harsh words are a stark contrast to the way he gently rubs my skin.
Shaking my head, I clarify, “It’s not a matter of whether or not you’re physically able to. His life belongs to the Senate.”
“Fuck them, and fuck their rules.”
I pull Sy back down on the couch, and then I straddle him, placing my hands on his broad shoulders. “If we do anything rash, it’s our lives on the line. Don’t give him that power,” I plead.
“Fine,” he grinds out. “Tell me about the Senate.”
“I don’t know a lot about them myself. Until Remus came here, I didn’t even know they were real. All I know is that the rumors state they’re made up of the heads from the most prominent families in our… well, family.” I sigh when I realize how hard it is to explain.
“Go on,” Sy urges me, squeezing my hips.
“I suppose they’re Remus’ council, and on certain things he requires their votes. Like giving me my freedom.”
Sy’s quiet for so long I don’t know if he’s going to say anything else. But then he rolls his eyes and scoffs. “Fabian is part of the Senate, isn’t he?”
“Yeah,” I admit in a small voice. “But Remus assured me that their vote doesn’t have to be unanimous.”
Of course, Sy has more questions, but I’m not able to answer any of them. In the end, I promise we’ll call Remus tomorrow and demand answers.
“How long do we have to stay in Rome?” Sy asks.
Not liking the look in his eyes, I shrug. “I don’t know.”
“When you call Remus tomorrow, tell him we’ll go right away.”