Chapter Twenty-One
Hagen
The next day, Hagen had spent most of his time on patrol, looking for evidence of the men who’d attacked Hildi and Brynja. They were nowhere to be found. He’d gone to MacQuarie land and talked with Thane, and he’d seen nothing.
Brynja had spent the day at Hildi’s side, but Hildi hadn’t awakened yet. Brenna had told him quietly that the longer it took her to awaken, the worse her chances were that she would recover.
He couldn’t imagine living his life as Brynja had. She’d watched her mother and aunt die, been kidnapped, escaped to a nunnery, and lived there.
Alone except for Hildi.
Oh, she’d made friends. Sheona and Simone and Magni and Beatris, but no family but Hildi.
Only one cousin.
Hagen sat by the hearth thinking on that one thought.
Jowell came in and took a seat next to him. “What are you thinking on? I can see the steam coming out of your ears.”
“Cousins. How many cousins do you think we have?”
Jowell’s eyes widened as he chuckled. “More than I can count?”
“I’m going to try. You, Alaric, Paden, Eli, Alick, Eli, Alasdair, Merelda…”
“Maryell, Broc, Chrissa, and then there are the Ramsays who we consider to be cousins, Ysenda, Errol, Thea, and then Brin… I could go on and on. What’s your point?”
“Brynja only has one—Hildi. Her mother’s dead, her aunt is dead, and that’s it. She lives in a nunnery. What the hell would it be like to only have one in your family?”
Jowell tipped his head in thought, steeping his fingers in front of him. “Ask your mother what it’s like. Didn’t she only have Claray when she met your father?”
Hagen scowled. “You’re right. I hadn’t thought of that. Both her parents were killed. Shite. What an awful life to live.”
Jowell stared at him. “You’re going to be careful with her, are you not?”
“What do you mean?”
His voice dropped, taking on an edge. “She’s not some prize to be won, Hagen.
She’s not a challenge or a diversion. She’s a woman who’s been broken and put herself back together with spit and rage.
And she deserves someone who sees that. Who understands what it cost her to trust anyone again. Don’t play with her feelings.”
Hagen forced himself to breathe. To think before responding. Because Jowell wasn’t wrong to be protective. If anything, Hagen respected him more for it.
“You’re right,” Hagen said quietly. “I’m beginning to understand why Grandda was known for protecting women.”
“Absolutely true. Now that we’re clear on that, I’m going to bed. Paden is already there.” The three shared a chamber with three beds in it since there were so many living or visiting at Duart at present.
“I’m going to check on Brynja, then I’ll be up.”
Hagen headed to the healing chamber, opening the door slowly in case anything that required privacy was happening, though he’d seen Brenna take her leave earlier. “Brynja?”
She sat next to Hildi, the saddest expression he’d ever seen on anyone’s face—a look of loneliness and defeat. “Brynja, may I come in?”
“Aye, please.”
“How is she?” he asked, entering and closing the door behind him.
“No change. She’s sleeping.”
“She’ll probably sleep all night, do you not think so?”
Brynja’s gaze went to her friend, and she reached over to brush a few wild strands of hair back from her face. “I suppose she will.”
“Would you go for a quick stroll with me? I’d like to show you something.”
She sighed and stood. “I do need to stretch my legs.”
He held the door for her, and they stepped into the great hall.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
“To a special place I’d like to share with you.” He pointed to the staircase.
She scowled. “Not your chamber. Your cousins are there.”
“Nay.” He laughed. “My sire would kill me first and then my mother. The parapets. They are spectacular here because of the Sound of Mull.” He led her up the first staircase, then down the passageway to a door at the end. “May I take your hand? It’s a dark staircase.”
She nodded, so he tucked her hand in his and led her up the stairs, pushing against the heavy door and holding it for her. There was a slight breeze that greeted him right away and he smiled.
“This place makes you happy,” she said.
“The smell of the sea does. It’s so different than our castle in the Highlands. It’s why we stay. There’s something about the water.” He led her around the parapets until they overlooked the Sound of Mull.
“It’s chilly. I should have brought my mantle.”
He said, “If you’ll allow it, I’ll tuck you in front of me and you’ll be protected from the wind.”
To his surprise, she agreed, stepping in front of him.
He wrapped his arms around her, yet making sure it wasn’t too tight.
He didn’t wish to frighten her. “I’ll tell you a story.
My grandfather always loved the parapets.
It’s where he spent much of his free time.
But he would also come up whenever he had to decide on battle plans, or whenever he had to decide who was to be in charge of certain things.
He loved it so much that it was one of the last things he did before he passed.
My father would carry him up to the parapets where they kept a chair for him.
He loved the wind in his hair, but his favorite part was the view.
He swore he could see all the way to the edge of the land of the Scots, though I doubt it. ”
She scanned the area from one way to the other, a sight she’d never seen before. “It’s beautiful. I’ve never seen anything like it, Hagen. My thanks for bringing me here. Tell me more about your grandsire. How did he meet your grandmother?”
“He was out patrolling, something he loved to do. He always wished to know who his neighbors were. He was a distance away with one of my uncles when he stopped at a manor home, but the owner was not friendly. They went inside, decided to spend the night, and he claims to have been compelled to open doors in the middle of the night. Said he came upon the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen in a chamber, sound asleep, but he knew he could never leave her. ”
“Why not? She was sleeping.”
“She’d been badly beaten. He left because her maid chased him out with a broom, but he couldn’t leave her. He and his brother were sent out by the owner, but they snuck back inside later, and he caught him whipping her, so he stole her away.”
“And they married right away?” she asked.
Hagen chuckled. “Nay. She didn’t trust him, but she didn’t trust any man. She was quiet, reserved, and afraid of men. Grandda said it took him forever to convince her that he would never hurt her.”
“And your sire found Sela, also someone held against her will. And they married.”
“That took him a while too. She stayed in an abbey because she didn’t think she deserved to marry Connor Grant. But he convinced her.”
“She’s so happy now.”
“Oh, naught makes my mother happier than grandbairns. She keeps hinting at me and Astra that she needs more. Morgan is too young yet.”
“How many summers are you?”
“Two and twenty. And you?”
“Eight and ten. Old enough to leave the abbey, but I have nowhere to go.” She stared out over the landscape and asked, “Have you been to all those places out there, Hagen Grant?”
“Nay. I’ve visited many, but not all. You?”
She smiled and said, “None. This is my first time on Mull. I’ve only been to Tiree and Iona.”
He stood back and turned her around to face him. Cupping her cheeks, he said, “Brynja, I’ll take you wherever you’d like to go. But may I kiss you first?”
She smiled and nodded.
His lips melded with hers, slowly and cautiously at first, not wanting to frighten her.
It was clear to him that she hadn’t been with a man before.
Everything about her was hesitant. His tongue teased hers and she opened for him, giving him access to the sweet cavern inside.
He teased and taunted her until her curiosity got the best of her, dueling with him until he was panting with a need he hadn’t felt in a long time.
A need to know more about her, taste her, make her his.
She surprised him by leaning into him, her curves fitting against him so perfectly it was as if they were made as one. Her arms slipped around his neck, and he deepened the kiss, growling with a need that was so fierce he feared what he would do.
He ended the kiss and she whispered, “You growled again.”
He laughed and kissed her forehead. “All your fault, lass. You inspire me.”
The door opened around the corner, and he moved enough to see his cousin there. Paden held the door open and said, “Hildi’s awake. Aunt Brenna woke me up.”
Brynja squealed and headed down the staircase, Hagen right behind her. “My thanks, Paden. Go back to bed.”
Brenna was already at the bottom of the stairs waiting for Brynja.
How he prayed her cousin was healed.