Chapter 9 #2
“I don’t know. What if I have a bathroom emergency, and there’s no proper wiping material?”
“You think that’s going to happen twice a day, do you?”
“What about poison ivy? I don’t want my underwear back if I accidentally brush against it.”
“You think that’s going to happen every twelve hours too?”
“Dude, I have never been camping.”
“It’s not real camping, though.”
“All I’ve seen are movies.”
“Were those movies comedies, by chance?”
“Maybe. And horror movies, of course.” I refused to look him in the eye. “What does that have to do with anything?”
He laughed at my discomfort. “Come on. Let’s go through your stuff.” The first thing he picked up was the suit I’d laid out. “What do you think you’re going to need this for? All the formal bonfires they’ll be throwing?”
“I don’t know.” Why was I the one full of anxiety this time? “Why are you so calm?”
He lifted one shoulder. “I don’t know. I think maybe Bree has helped me.”
“With her magical vagina?” I asked dryly.
“No.” He gave me a pointed dirty look. “She talks things through with me. When I wanted to pack a fire extinguisher, she suggested they probably had some on hand that stayed with the cabins.”
“Ah. So she called you an idiot without really using that word.”
“No. She was rational and talked things out with me. She’s really a godsend that way.”
“I hate to say it—mostly because it will go to her head if it gets back to her—but she has been good for you. I don’t like that I’ve lost my best friend—”
“You haven’t lost me.” He gave me a dirty look. “I admit I’ve been a bit more distracted of late, but you’re still my best friend.”
“There was a time when I was your only friend.”
He rolled his eyes. “I’ll try to spend quality time with you at the retreat. How does that sound?”
“Like Bree wants to spend quality time with the other chicks there, and you’re going to be bored.”
“Knock it off. I’m being serious.” He carried my suit to the closet and hung it up, making sure it was straight on the hanger before turning back to me. “Have you ever considered, instead of giving me a hard time about my fiancée, that maybe you should find somebody to spend time with?”
“I do that most weekends.”
“That’s not what I mean. I’m talking about a real somebody.” He paused for one dramatic beat. “Maybe like Bella or something.”
Oh, geez. Did he think he was being smooth? I’d never seen anybody quite so heavy handed with ulterior motives. “Did Bree send you over here to talk to me about Bella before the retreat?”
“Of course not!” Brody sounded beside himself, something he obviously realized because he immediately adjusted his tone. “I was just wondering. You’ve gone above and beyond for her from the moment you met her.”
“So?” Defensiveness crept up my spine. “She needs help.”
“I don’t disagree. This whole thing feels… yucky.”
“Yucky? What an adult word choice.”
“What word would you use?”
“Bullshit,” I answered without hesitation. “It’s bullshit what he’s put her through. The biggest problem is that she doesn’t see him as a threat, just a nuisance.”
“Do you think he’s a threat?”
“Probably not physically. I would guess she’s right on that.
The other stuff, though.” I touched my tongue to my top lip, hesitating, then barreled forward.
“He wants to hurt her emotionally. He already has. She realizes it and thinks she’s already out from under his thumb, but he still has cards to play. ”
“And you think he’s going to use this retreat to play them.”
“I do.”
“And you’re not going to let him.”
It wasn’t a question, but I answered anyway. “I can’t just sit back and let him hurt her when I know I can do something about it. My mother was bullied by my father the same way he’s bullying Bella.”
“Do you see your mother in Bella? Is that why you were so quick to offer your services?”
“I lose nothing from pretending to be with her. She gains everything. I can’t sit back and do nothing while this guy terrorizes her. It doesn’t feel right.”
“I want to help her too,” Brody assured me. “It’s just… are you sure you don’t have a thing for her?”
“No. I don’t have a thing for her. I just don’t want anything bad to happen to her.”
“Are you sure? Because if you like her, I can totally be your wingman.” He puffed himself out. “Just like you were my wingman when I was courting Bree.”
“You did not just use the word ‘courting.’” I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.
“What would you call it?”
“Banging and boning.”
His expression turned dark. “I am not calling it that.”
I laughed because I couldn’t help myself and dropped my hands on Brody’s shoulders. “I appreciate you looking out for me. I really do. I’m not interested in a relationship, though. I just don’t want anything bad to happen to her. If I can help, I’m going to do it.”
Brody nodded. “Okay. If you change your mind, though, I’m so ready to be your wingman.”
“I will keep that in mind.” I turned away from him. “Just out of curiosity, did Bree make you come over here to ask that question?”
“Yeah. She’s got a bet going with Hayley that you and Bella will be—how did you put it? Banging and boning?—by the end of the retreat.”
“She says we will be?”
“Yup.”
“And what does Hayley say?”
“That it will be within the first three nights of the retreat.”
I snorted. “They are both idiots when they want to be.”
“Hey, that’s my future wife you’re talking about.”
“Maybe so, but they’re both romantic fools. Just because I don’t want to see somebody get hurt, that doesn’t mean I want to get horizontal with her.”
“Fair enough.” Brody held up his hands again in surrender. “I was just checking. We’re all going to be working together to make sure that Preston Martin Charles III doesn’t get what he’s looking for.”
“We need to scare him off from organizing future events too. He’s the reason we all got tricked into something we didn’t technically agree to.”
“I don’t know. I’m kind of looking forward to it. Bree and I plan to have romantic walks on the water and nights by the fire.”
“Gross.” I made a face. “You’re so disgusting now. How did that happen?”
“I have no idea.” His grin made him look ten years younger. “She just brings it out in me.”
“You’re gross. You need to realize that.”
“Oh, I do. Love makes it so you don’t care, though.”
“I’ll have to take your word for it.”
“Maybe for today. Eventually, you’ll see.” Brody grabbed a flannel off the bed. “Now, let’s get you packed so I don’t break out in hives from nerves.”
“Yes, we can’t have that.”