Chapter 17
SEVENTEEN
Iwas her literary crush? That was just… well, I had no idea how I was supposed to feel about it.
I hadn’t considered it until Taffy Oakley—and there had to be a story behind that name, one I was determined to hear, eventually—had just blurted it out as if it weren’t a big deal.
It somehow felt important, even though I couldn’t immediately ascertain why.
Bella had run into the bathroom as if her hair were on fire. I’d let her go, even though I had questions, to give myself some time to think it through.
Bella had read my books? Of course she had. In hindsight, it was ridiculous that I hadn’t realized that. She loved horror movies. That would naturally spread to horror fiction. Not always, but often. She was an author. Every author wanted to write what they loved.
So knowing that, why hadn’t it occurred to me that Bella would have actually read my stuff?
Preston had tried to shame her with the movies and even suggested she was just with me because I could help her write what she really wanted to write.
We weren’t really together, but he didn’t know that.
Still, I was curious why Bella hadn’t brought it up.
I walked to the kitchen sink and splashed some water on my face.
Then I combed some through my hair to cool down the sudden heat coursing through me.
I’d been impressed by how honest Bella had been with her mother.
I had never considered being that truthful with my father.
Heck, when she’d still been alive, I hadn’t been that honest with my mother either.
Now, so far removed from her death and what could have been, I was angry at myself.
But nothing could be done about it. Still, Taffy Oakley had to be the most honest parent I’d ever interacted with. The condoms thing was hilarious.
I was still leaning against the sink, considering how I could use that in a book, when Bella exited the bathroom. She regarded me leerily.
“Ready for dinner?” she asked in a worried voice.
“Yes.” I could have let her off the hook, but I decided to take a page out of Taffy’s book instead. “Do you want me to sign something for you since you’re such a fan?”
That was the exact right way to phrase it because she gave me a dour look. “Do you think you’re funny?”
“Yup.” I grinned. “It’s okay that you’ve read my stuff. I’m not going to make a big deal out of it, even if I am your literary hero.”
“Geez.” She folded her arms across her chest and jutted out her chin. “That is ridiculous.”
“Just admit you love the way my mind works.”
For a moment, just a split-second really, an emotion I didn’t recognize sparked in her eyes. If I wasn’t very much mistaken, it was heat. But it was gone, walled away behind annoyance, before I could think too hard on it.
“Just because I introduced you to my mother and she spouted off a bunch of nonsense, that doesn’t mean you’re special.”
There was no stopping my smirk. “I happen to think your mother is pretty great.”
Her expression softened. “Yeah. I got lucky there. She hung around even though I mistreated her.”
“Something tells me she knew it would be worth it. You’re a good person, Bella.”
“Not always. I was a bad person for a long time. I allowed Preston to turn me into a bad person.”
“Stop that.” I vehemently shook my head. “You cannot take the blame for what Preston did. Yes, you made mistakes. There was no malice involved, though. With you at least. As for him…”
She nodded. “I understand what you’re saying. Also, I’m sorry I didn’t warn you that I was going to tell my mother the truth. I can’t lie to her. Not again.”
“You don’t have to lie to her.” I meant it. “I’m fine with whatever you want here.”
“I know. That’s why you’re so great.”
“I believe your mother said I was your literary crush.” I delighted in the way her eyes narrowed. “It’s okay,” I added hastily. “You can crush on me all you want.”
“Keep it up,” she warned, sweeping toward the door.
I fell into step behind her. “I’ve always wanted to be somebody’s literary crush. There’s a group of women on Facebook who call themselves Nathan’s Nymphos. You should join that group. You probably have a lot in common.”
She scalded me with a look over her shoulder. “Why do you always do this?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know. I just find it funny.” I pressed my hand to the door before she could open it. “If you want to write horror, you can always bounce your ideas off of me.”
She made a face. “I’m fine writing what I’m writing.”
“I know that. If you ever want to branch out, though, I’m here to talk about it with you. I have been through it all before.”
“Don’t you think I should do the smart thing and write what I know can make money? I left my relationship with Preston with nothing. I didn’t even get severance because I walked off the job with his father and gave no notice.”
“That goat scrotum.” I muttered. “He still has to give you what you’ve earned even if you do walk off the job. Are you telling me he didn’t?”
Bella looked caught off guard. “I don’t… how do you know that?” she asked finally.
“Because my father has talked about workplace law to me so many times I’ve lost count. He’s been caught in several lawsuits because he’s a jerk. I know exactly what somebody can get away with, and what you’re describing is not one of those things.”
“Huh.” Bella looked genuinely perplexed. “It’s not worth going after now,” she said finally. “That will just bring Preston Martin Charles II in, and you don’t want to meet him.”
I had no doubt she was telling the truth. I wouldn’t let it go, though. “I’m getting you your severance.”
“You can’t. Preston doesn’t have the power to grant that to me.”
“Oh, I’m betting he does.” I pulled back my hand so she could open the door. “I’m being serious about the writing. I get that you have a plan you’re following. When you’re ready to branch out—and that will happen when you feel more financially secure—I’ll be here to help you.”
She paused before stepping over the threshold. “How can you be sure that you won’t get sick of me between now and then? You might not even want to be my friend after this retreat.”
My heart tugged at the earnest expression on her face. She was braced for people not to care about her because her father, and then Preston and his family, had taught her that was the way the world worked. Well, I wasn’t going to do that to her.
“I will always be here to help you, Bellarino,” I promised her. “Not everybody leaves.”
“That’s the weird thing,” she admitted. “I left Preston, and before I even realized it, but I’m still on shaky ground with him. I’m not sure what I’m afraid of there.”
I knew. Now wasn’t the time to discuss it, though.
“He can’t hurt you, Bella.” My voice was soft.
“He’s trying, but he can’t do it because you’re bigger than him.
That’s the reason he wanted you in the first place.
You were always larger than life, Bella.
He wanted that power for himself.” I took a deep breath before finishing it out.
“He wanted to take that power from you so he could feel powerful himself.”
She considered it. “I just want him to leave me alone. Why won’t he just go away?”
She sounded so vulnerable I did the only thing I could and pulled her into my arms for a hug.
I was rocked by the way she felt pressed against me. She was so short, so tiny, that I could wrap myself around her completely, and nobody would be able to touch her. She was warm, delicate, and she giggled with her face against my chest.
“You’re such a moose,” she said out of nowhere.
I smiled as I rubbed my hands over her back. Touching her felt somehow inevitable. It was a bad idea—a terrible idea, really—but I couldn’t stop myself. “I am not abnormally large.”
She lifted her eyes, amusement playing in them.
“Actually, I am abnormally large when we’re talking about that,” I said pointedly, unable to let the moment pass without making light of it. “You’re just pocket-sized.”
“You’re exaggerating.”
“I’m not.” To my surprise, and clearly hers, I pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Come on. We should get to dinner. It will probably take me forever to eat ten steak medallions because he has to go small whenever he thinks he’s going big for food.”
“Yeah.” Bella pulled away, an unreadable look on her face. Was the forehead kiss too much? “Will you be offended if I drink too much at the bonfire tonight? I feel the need to get a little rowdy.”
That elicited a full smile from me. “I believe I can be persuaded to join you in that little endeavor.”
“Yeah?” Her beautiful smile was back. “Remind me to tell you about the time my mother made a Witchy Sour for Preston on one of the few times he could be bothered to visit Salem in October. She dosed it with an herb that gives people the runs.”
I barked out a laugh. “Your mother sounds crazy.”
“She is, but it’s the good type of crazy. I used to think she didn’t realize they were belittling her. She did. She just refused to react because she knew that would bother them more than any mean thing she could have said to them.”
“Your mother is a goddess amongst men.”
“My mother is everything. I wish I hadn’t forgotten that.”
“You won’t forget it again.” I gave her shoulder a squeeze. “Now, come on. We need to carb up if we’re going to drink.”
“I like the way your mind works.”
I watched her walk down the stairs, a soft smile playing on my face. I liked the way her everything worked. What was I supposed to do with that sudden realization? Neither of us were in a place to try to make something of this.
What if you are ready, though? My inner voice was a nag. This time, I couldn’t silence it. All I could do was wonder.
Maybe I wasn’t as far gone as I thought I was from the future Bree and Brody had predicted.