Chapter 20 Retreat and Regroup
Retreat and Regroup
Harper
“I really need to go home.” I’m pretty sure that’s the twentieth time I’ve said that this morning. Caden’s chef made a breakfast spread for us. I’m curious how many females have enjoyed this everything breakfast buffet, but I’m not about to ask.
Fortunately, I slipped an extra pair of panties into my purse last night, knowing the guys’ obsession with collecting them. But I’m still in my dress, which is a bit much for first thing in the morning.
“Eat first, little nympho.” Caden has me trapped on his lap with a plate full of food in front of us. The others are seated around the huge table.
“It’s Sunday. Why the rush, princess?” Luke’s gaze lifts to mine, and I blush.
You’d think I’d be done blushing after the past few nights, but this morning in the shower, well… Everyone joined in, and I lost track of who was touching what or who my mouth was on or who I was touching. It was deliciously disorienting.
But Luke has been persistent all morning. I’ve had his cock in my mouth or in my hands more than the others. And Caden is just as bad, but he wants his mouth between my legs. I squirm in my seat, which happens to be Caden’s lap. His chest rumbles behind me, and I swear I’ll never be dry again.
“Want me to ease that ache, little nympho?” Caden whispers in my ear, sending a riot of need cascading through my system.
Dammit, I desperately need some distance from these guys.
“Mom expects me home.” I pick up some toast and eat a few bites. “I don’t usually stay out all night.”
“We don’t have school tomorrow.” Jack looks at me hopefully. “We can play all day, sweetheart.”
My insides soften and heat at his words. I’m so screwed when it comes to these guys. Everything they do and say makes me want them.
“I need to go home, change, and check in with my mom, but I might…” I can’t believe I’m about to say this. “I might be able to hang out this afternoon.”
Nico’s smile captures me. We haven’t caught up yet. Everything has gone so fast with him being a horseman and joining in their games with me. But his smile is soft. He wants more than my virginity. Even Caden seems to want more.
The others, I’m not so sure of yet.
I’m also not sure how that will work. I mean, relationships with multiple partners exist, but I’m not sure how it works long term.
And we’re only high school seniors. Our whole lives are spread out before us.
How many people actually end up with their high school boyfriend?
Especially five of them, and all probably going to separate colleges.
Maybe I should enjoy them while I have them and not get too attached.
My gaze stops on Eli. His dark hair and eyes have held me captive on more than one occasion. I could see him being a lawyer. He’d look good in a suit, and with his commanding presence, he could rule the courtroom. When he notices me noticing him, he winks.
A little spark ignites in my chest.
“By hangout, you mean?” Jack scratches the scruff on his chin.
I turn to Jack. “I mean hangout, not just play sex games all afternoon.”
“Maybe we can alternate.” Caden’s deep voice in my ear makes me want to sink into him. “A movie, some spin the bottle, Monopoly, seven minutes in heaven, a little swimming.”
“Monopoly?” I glance over my shoulder at him. I can’t imagine these guys sitting down and playing Monopoly.
Caden’s grin is sinful as he lifts his hand to cup my breast. “Strip Monopoly with more interesting ways to get out of jail.”
I can’t help the laugh that comes out of me. “And you’ll all play Monopoly?”
I raise my eyebrows as I look around the table. Everyone agrees until my gaze stops on Luke. His eyes burn into me, and my core clenches, knowing that look. He wants to fuck me. And part of me really wants to rip off the Band-Aid and feel him inside me.
Feel them all inside me.
But I also don’t want to give in this easily. After all, this wasn’t my plan to begin with. They bullied me into being with them. I’m still afraid once they get what they want, they’ll leave me. Words are all good, but I don’t know if I can trust them yet.
Though they’ve been building that trust, little by little. They seem determined for me to give them my virginity, and even though they’ve had opportunities, they haven’t taken it.
I can’t forget their “punishment.” The seven minutes in the closet at school. A shudder rolls through me. When will they decide to punish me again? How far will they take it next time?
“Sure, princess, I’ll play Monopoly.” Luke’s gaze doesn’t release mine.
I shake off the feeling. “Who’s driving me home?”
I follow Nico to his car, and he opens the door for me. The guys actually played rock, paper, scissors to figure out who got to take me home. I guess alone time with me, even in a car, is precious right now.
When he starts the car, I turn to him. “Tell me about your life.”
He grins as he backs out of Caden’s driveway. “New York was a trip after growing up here. I went to a really good private school. Made some friends, but no one as close as you guys.”
My mouth tightens. “When did you become friends with the horsemen? Seriously, we spent all our time together, so how didn’t I know?”
Nico cringes. “I might have wanted to keep you to myself. We were all noticing girls more in fifth grade, and I worried you might like one of them more than me.”
I shake my head. “You were my best friend. I would have stayed with you.”
The guys weren’t as badass back in fifth grade, but they were still popular and cute. I might have had a small crush on Luke once upon a time, but nothing I would have acted on. Especially once they rose to power.
“Besides, being around them was different than being around you.” Nico blew out a breath. “You and I still played together. The guys and I were in football camp, and that year we blew everyone else out of the water. We were unstoppable. It felt good to be part of that.”
It makes sense. I still don’t know how they all became the horsemen, but that story can wait. “Okay, so back to New York. Did you have a girlfriend?”
He glances at me warily. “A couple. They didn’t last long. I never fell in love with them.”
My chest tightens. Huh? It kind of hurts he had someone special enough to date regularly. The other guys never have and that made me feel special, even if the only reason they’re with me is because I am—was untouched. I don’t know why I assumed Nico would never have had a girlfriend.
“Honestly, those other girls never compared to you. Maybe I put you on a pedestal. This girl who was my best friend. Who was gorgeous, wild, and free. I wanted to recapture that, but those girls weren’t the same.” Nico glances my way, and I blush at his compliments.
Exhaling, I glance out the window.
“When the horsemen started to take over, I went into lockdown mode. I couldn’t go to their parties when we were in middle school, so I kind of snuck by them.
” Pushing my hair out of my face, I turn to him.
“I didn’t want to add to their numbers. I didn’t want to be one of those girls who was proud the horsemen fucked them.
It just seemed like the horsemen used those girls, like those girls were some sort of reward for their hard work. ”
“And now?” Nico pulls onto my street.
I blow out a breath. “I don’t know. At the beginning, it seemed like they were using me to finish their list. But then they wanted to own me for the whole year, but how can I trust them to want me all year? Especially after they get what they want from me.”
Nico stops in my driveway and puts the car into park. “And what do you think we want from you?”
My breath catches on the we. It’s so hard to remember he’s one of them. But he’s also mine. But where does his loyalty stand if he’s tested? Will he stay with me or go with them?
“Promise not to tell them?” I hold up my pinkie finger, hoping our bond is stronger.
His face softens, and he holds up his pinkie finger to wrap around mine. “Promise.”
I inhale. “They want my virginity, but once they have it, what will keep them with me? I think I’m starting to like them more than I used to, and the thought of them with another girl makes me feel queasy.
But once they get the prize, what will be left for them?
The novelty of a girl who will let all of them have her at the same time.
I know they’ll want to continue to have sex with me, but how long will that last? ”
Nico takes my hand in his, and his dark eyes hold me. “You’ve got it all wrong, sunshine. Your virginity isn’t the prize. You are.”
What? “That doesn’t make sense.” I start to take my hand away.
“We all want you.” His hand refuses to release mine.
“They don’t even know me,” I spit out. “They know my body, but they don’t know me.”
“Then stop hiding yourself from them.” Nico’s other hand tips my chin up. “I think they already suspect you’re this amazing girl. You’re just afraid to let them in. To let us in. You’re afraid if you let us in, even if we see the real you, we might leave you.”
I draw in a shuddering breath. “It’s not unreasonable to think that.”
He smiles, and his thumb traces over my bottom lip.
“You’re right. You have to trust all of us.
And maybe at some point you will. But you can trust me when I say I’m here for you.
I want you. The girl with the skinned knees and the potty mouth.
The fearless girl who climbed to the top of the tree just to beat me.
I want the girl who would call me on my shit. ”
I smile and roll my eyes. “I’m not that girl anymore—”
“Yes, you are. And even though I hate to say it, I think that’s the girl they want too. They want you, Harper. Probably as much as I do. I’m not saying you have to give in to what you feel for us, but consider there may be more to this than just sex.”