Chapter 19
Nina didn’t understand how, exactly, she had healed Kasik. The memory of it felt like a dream that faded the longer she was
awake.
The attay was there, simmering in her veins, and though she felt as if she had only just peered beneath the surface, she knew
the implications of this power would change the course of her life all the same.
More than anything, Nina wanted answers. An explanation. Shayim seemed more than willing to guide her, but Nina only wondered
how she could use it to her benefit, and what it would cost her. What was she expected to do with this gods-given power?
It felt like shackles around her wrists dragging her toward an unknown future, like any hope she had in returning to her once-normal,
boring life was dissipating into the wind. No longer was she a forgotten nobody. No longer could she claim ignorance.
This power and the choices that came with it were hers to command.
As she and Kasik walked through the camp, she felt the pressure of curious eyes on her, and she returned their attention tenfold.
In each of their chests were threads of light calling to her and begging to be used. Nina swallowed and glanced at Kasik,
who was also watching and assessing everyone they passed, a furrow between his brow and his hands balled into fists at his
sides as if an enemy might spring upon them at any moment.
What a pair they made, each seeing something entirely different. Where Nina saw life, Kasik saw threats. He was wary, and
it made her wary. How much longer could they remain without consequence?
Hatun stalked ahead of them, his contempt clear with every step he took. Nina had no doubt he would kill them if it was his choice. But it wasn’t. It seemed that Shayim was the leader of this group, and it was Shayim she needed more answers from.
The woman had known about her attay. More than that, she knew how it worked and had some of her own. There were more people
like her. She wasn’t alone, and she had one day to learn the answers to all her questions.
Hatun led them toward the large fire at the center of the camp. There were other people milling about, but most were seated
on stools or on the ground, steaming bowls of food in their hands. They all wore varying shades of green, and the tents were
green to match the trunks of the trees. The space was open but somehow closed off at the same time. A thick canopy of leaves
provided shade from above.
It was beautiful here. Peaceful. It made her feel at home.
Kasik’s shoulder brushed hers and she was tempted to lean into his touch, to take from him the strength and confidence he
seemed to exude despite the precarious situation they were in. Once again, she wondered what it felt like to navigate life
with such faith. How he kept on his feet when it felt as though everything was set on tearing them down.
Hatun came to an abrupt stop and gestured vaguely to the right. Nina saw Shayim seated alone on a large tree trunk, a bundle
of strings in her lap and her lips moving silently as her fingers ran over a thread.
“He doesn’t seem to like you very much,” Nina murmured once Hatun was out of range.
“The feeling is mutual.” Kasik shifted closer, his body blocking Nina’s line of sight to Shayim. “We don’t know what they
want, so be careful what you say. It’s best we keep who you are to ourselves.”
Nina looked into his eyes and saw the sincerity in them.
Always committed to keeping her safe. His duty, she reminded herself.
But she agreed that it served no purpose to disclose her role in their strange relationship of emperor’s betrothed and protector.
“I won’t tell,” she agreed, and the furrow between his brow softened the smallest bit.
They walked to where Shayim sat. She watched them approach with a serene smile. “Sit,” she said, pointing to the bench across
from her. “You look much better than the last time I saw you.”
“She helped me heal you,” Nina clarified for Kasik. He nodded but said nothing. The tension in the air felt like sludge, making
everything seem slower and louder than it was. Nina opened her mouth to fill the awkward silence when a girl appeared with
two bowls of porridge.
“Thank you, Mika,” Shayim said.
The girl looked about Nina’s age, with copper skin and short brown hair. Her green tunic was darker than the others, and around
her waist was a thin piece of fabric embroidered with familiar pink flowers and red-and-green birds. A gold band hung from
her wrist, and she smiled when she saw Nina inspecting it. “I can make you one, if you’d like.”
“I’d love that,” Nina said, surprised and delighted by the offer. She reminded Nina of Sacha, with her bright eyes and infectious
smile and the way she always made others feel seen and included. Nina felt as though she could never get a proper read on
people. She was always unsure of motives and emotions, constantly withdrawing to decipher her own thoughts and feelings, but
the girl’s intent was plain as day.
“I’ll find you later,” she said before walking off. Nina watched her go and was nearly blinded by the force of the girl’s
will. How easy it would be to wield.
Next to her, Kasik shifted, and his thigh brushed hers. The touch grounded her.
“It’s always interesting,” Shayim said unexpectedly, “to See certain choices made. I’m endlessly surprised by how the threads
shift.”
Nina froze and leveled a look at the woman, trying to convey a message without words. She felt Kasik glance at her, then back to Shayim. “What is that supposed to mean?”
Shayim’s mouth tipped into a secretive smile. “Only that life is like a tapestry, and weaving is an intricate and tedious
affair. One stitch, one small misstep, can make all the difference.”
“Then you understand why we need to leave as soon as possible,” Kasik said. “One day can set us far from our intended path.”
“Tell me, Kamayuq.” Shayim shifted forward, elbows on knees, and stared intently into Kasik’s eyes. “Should I allow you to
leave now that you have seen this place?”
“I’m not entirely sure what ‘this place’ is, or where exactly we are. Cover our eyes and lead us out. We’ll be sure to never
return.”
“And if I don’t?” Nina felt Kasik tense with Shayim’s words. She wondered, if he had a weapon, would it have been in his hands
then? “Cover your eyes, that is,” Shayim added. “Will you scurry back to your emperor and tell him what you have seen? What
is the weight of your word?”
“My word,” Kasik started, his tone sharp, “is all that I am. And my loyalty lies with Emperor Maicu. As it always has and always will.”
He peered at Nina, a quick, sidelong glance that softened the tension in his jaw. “But I admit to knowing little and remembering
even less in these last few days. Especially if you allow us to take an achipuma with us when we go.”
Shayim smiled and leaned back. “Clever boy,” she said. Her eyes flicked to Nina and away. “And are you loyal to her?”
Nina pressed her lips together, waiting for an answer she knew better than to want. Kasik was loyal to the emperor only, she staunchly reminded herself. Despite the fact that they had saved each other’s lives, and despite the bond that came from such a thing. That was the only reason she hoped.
“It is because I am loyal to her that I honor my word,” Kasik said, his voice dangerously low, the conviction in it sending chills up Nina’s
arms. “Anything else would put many lives in jeopardy.”
The sounds of the camp seemed to fade into the distance. It was only the three of them surrounded by a vast forest and an
uncertain path out.
“Kamayuq Kasik,” Shayim said. His title sounded more like a taunt than an honorific. “Is that a threat?”
“It is a promise. If anything happens to us, Emperor Maicu will find you all, and he will not be as forgiving as I am.”
Shayim chuckled and shook her head, but her mirth set Nina on edge. It felt like whatever she said next would push them over
an invisible line. “Your tayta’s temperament simmers beneath that carefully constructed facade.”
It was Nina’s turn to glance at Kasik in confusion. He was eerily still, animosity pouring off him in waves. Nina was certain
now that if he had been armed, they all would have been in danger. But it was no coincidence that Shayim made that comment,
and Nina was eager to find out what it meant.
“Whatever you think you know about me or my tayta will not change anything. Do not believe that I am so easily distracted,”
Kasik seethed.
Anyone else might have turned away from his anger, but Shayim leaned closer. “There are many secrets between us,” she said
softly. “But I will share one so that there is one less. Once upon a time, I served Emperor Yachua. My sister was betrothed
to him, and we journeyed to the capital together. Her name was Aliyma, and you are a spitting image of her.”
Kasik stood abruptly, his bowl of porridge splattering to the ground. Nina gasped and slid sideways.
“Do not—”
“I served as the emperor’s Seer,” Shayim interrupted, her voice firmer than before. “A position that made me more powerful
than your tayta, much to his dismay.”
“Now I know you lie,” Kasik seethed. “There is no such thing as a ‘Seer.’ ”
“I can assure you there is,” Shayim said pointedly.
“I have been beside the emperor for years. I would know if there are Seers, or—”
“I never said there still were,” Shayim said sadly. “Only that there was. You can choose to believe me or not, but consider whether you know as much as you think you do, or if you only know what
you have been told.”
Nina watched Kasik closely, ready to reach over and . . . what? Comfort him? Sheild him? She only knew that his body had stiffened
before her very eyes, and what was at first confusion and then curiosity had morphed into something colder and sharper, as
if he had come to a decision and would not be persuaded otherwise.
“I need some air,” he said before stomping away.
Nina watched him go and fought the urge to follow.
“The achilla around his neck,” Shayim said, turning to Nina. “Did he tell you where it is from?”
“It was his mamay’s,” she said quietly.
Shayim snorted. “It seems as though he’s been led to believe many false things. And you, Nina from Limac, what do you believe?”
Nina thought of all the things she had been led to believe. The sacrifices she had made because she had thought they were
her only choices. If she had been more aware of her attay when the emperor’s men had come for her, would she have given in
so easily? Could she have used it to do something more than surrender?
She could still feel the golden thread of Kasik’s will within her hands, the way it had fallen under her complete control, and wondered what else her power could do.
“I don’t know anymore, but I’d like to find out.”
Shayim smiled. “Then you’ve been led to the right place, my child.”