Millie
Millie
M illie woke before the sun was up the next morning. She was excited about seeing the baby today. Although, she wasn’t sure how she felt about having Ranger with her when it happened. It was going to take some time to get used to him being around. Keeping her secret was easier than sharing her pregnancy with him. She wasn’t sure how any of this was going to work between then, but they only had three months to figure it all out. Then, their little person would be there, and they needed to have their shit together. Their baby deserved at least that much from the two of them.
Going back home with Ranger was the right thing to do. She was going to need help and there was no reason for her to hide away now that he knew about the baby. Plus, it would be nice to see her friends again and share her news—especially with Ruby. Millie had to be careful about everything that she said to her friend over the past few months, but now, she’d be able to ask Ruby a gazillion questions about being pregnant. Plus, they could have playdates and talk about everything baby, once their little ones were born. She was actually excited about going home. What she wasn’t excited about was having to live with Ranger. She was sure that decision was a mistake, but what choice did she have? She couldn’t impose on Ruby with her baby coming in just two months. She’d really need to be settled in the next few months and living in someone’s spare room wasn’t her idea of home. Millie would give herself some time, but as soon as it was safe for her and the baby, she’d find an apartment nearby Ranger so that he could help out with the baby.
“You’re up early,” Ranger said when she walked into the kitchen to get a glass of water.
“Yeah, I guess I’m excited about the sonogram today. I can’t wait to see him or her,” she admitted, rubbing her belly. “Do you think that they’ll be able to tell us what we’re having?” she asked.
“Do you want to know?” Ranger asked.
“I think that I’d like to know,” she said. “I’ve picked up a few things for the baby, as money has allowed,” she said nodding to the few items that she had been able to get second-hand. “I would like to buy some gender-specific clothing and decorate the nursery when I can find my own apartment.”
“Your own apartment?” he asked. “I thought that you said that you’d stay with me.”
“Your spare room isn’t a home for our baby. I mean, I’m sure that you’ll want a room for him or her, but our child should have a place in both of our homes.”
“When did we decide on two separate homes, Millie?” Ranger growled.
“Well, I certainly don’t remember agreeing to one home for the three of us, Ranger,” she said. “I mean, you only just started talking to me again after six months of ignoring me.”
“And I said that I was sorry about that. I acted like an ass,” he countered.
“You did, but your apology doesn’t mean that we’re living together now,” she said. “I mean, I’m still trying to get used to you knowing about my baby.”
“Our baby,” he shouted. Ranger sighed and took a step back from her. “Listen, this isn’t good for your blood pressure. Let’s just have breakfast and I need coffee. Then, maybe we can sit down and figure some of this mess out. There has to be a compromise in all of this, somewhere.” She wasn’t sure if they would find a compromise any time soon. She hated feeling so unsure of not only herself but of Ranger too.
“I just want to see the baby and make sure that everything is all right with my pregnancy,” she admitted. “After that, we can sit down and come up with some ground rules. I appreciate you letting me live with you, but I won’t cramp your style. I don’t want to be a burden. I hope that we can be friends, Ranger,” she said, “for our baby’s sake.”
He paced the floor in front of her, something that he did a lot, and ran his fingers through his already unruly hair. “What if I wanted to be more than friends, Millie?” he asked.
“We tried that, and it didn’t work,” she reminded. After their night together she wanted him to move in with her, but not to keep her safe. Ranger went on and on about him moving in with her for her own safety and that just pissed her off. Millie wondered if he had slept with her just to get her to agree to let him move into her place to keep an eye on her. She wanted to ask him if he felt anything for her, but she was sure that she already knew his answer and it was only going to hurt her feelings.
“We slept together once,” he said. “That hardly counts as us being more than just friends. I won’t fuck it up again, Millie. Just give me another chance to prove that to you.”
“Can I think about it?” Millie asked. She noted the disappointment on his face, and she felt bad for making him feel that way, but she didn’t want to rush into anything that would affect her baby. If she moved into Ranger’s place permanently, and it didn’t work out, her child would be the one paying the price and she couldn’t allow that to happen. This decision was going to be one that she wouldn’t take lightly, even if her not giving Ranger an answer right away, upset him.
“Sure,” he agreed. “You should shower and get dressed while I make us something to eat. We’ll need to leave for the hospital in just over an hour.” They had given her the earliest appointment that they had for her sonogram. She was thankful that she wouldn’t have to wait all day to make sure that her baby was all right. It was torture trying to sleep last night without having all of the answers that she needed to hear. As soon as she found out that the baby was all right, she’d find a way to sit quietly and decide what to do about Ranger’s offer.
By the time she checked into the hospital for her tests and sonogram, she was about ten minutes late. “How is it possible that I’m up before dawn and still late for my appointment?” she asked Ranger.
“You took forever in the shower,” Ranger grumbled.
“Hey, you took forever to make breakfast,” she accused.
The technician who had gotten her ready for her sonogram giggled. “How long have you two been married?” she asked.
“What? We’re not married,” Millie insisted. “We’re not even together. We had sex once and I got pregnant, but then, he ghosted me.”
“Jesus,” Ranger moaned, “can you not tell everyone our personal business? I mean, I’ve apologized a few times now. What will it take for you to actually forgive me, Millie?” he asked.
“I’m not sure yet, but I’ll let you know,” she hissed. The technician pulled up Millie’s shirt exposing her belly and she almost wanted to tell her to cut it out. It was the first time that Ranger had seen her belly since the night that he got her pregnant. Her body had changed so much, that she worried that he’d find her gross now.
“Sorry to bring it up and cause a tiff,” the technician said. “You two just act like an old married couple. You certainly argue like one too. This might be a little cold,” she said, squirting some gel onto Millie’s belly.
“Will we be able to find out the baby’s sex?” she asked.
“I’ll try,” the technician said. “Sometimes these little guys don’t cooperate. If I can tell, do you want to know?” she asked.
“I’d like to know,” Millie agreed.
“I don’t know that I’d like to know,” Ranger said. “I like to have some things be a surprise.”
“Well, I just surprised you two days ago, letting you know that I was pregnant with your baby. Wasn’t that enough of a surprise for a bit?” Millie asked.
“If you don’t want to know, you can always step out of the room,” the technician offered.
“But then Millie will know, and I won’t,” Ranger said.
“Right—we’ll both get what we want. We’ll be compromising just like you said earlier,” Millie said.
“You didn’t let me finish what I was going to say,” Ranger said.
“Go on then,” Millie prompted.
“I was going to say that you have a big mouth and will tell everyone in town, including our mutual friends and I’ll eventually find out what we’re having. So, it’s not really a compromise. I’ll eventually lose.”
“I’m not sure what you want me to say here, Ranger. I want to know the sex of the baby—my baby,” she said.
“Our baby,” he shouted, causing the technician to jump. “Stop calling him or her your baby. We made that baby together and it’s our kid.”
“Fine,” Millie spat. “I’m going to find out what sex our baby is since he or she is inside of my body and it’s my decision to know.” The technician was bobbing her head back and forth between the two of them as if she was watching a ping pong match.
“Have we made some kind of decision here? I have a full schedule today,” the technician said. “How about if I can tell the baby’s sex, I’ll write it down and put it into an envelope. You two can decide what to do with it later after you’ve had some time to think about it, and maybe some couple’s counseling.” Millie wanted to point out that they didn’t need couple’s counseling because they weren’t a couple, but that wasn’t the truth. Even if they weren’t together romantically, they were still two people who were going to raise a child together and that made them a couple, for better or worse.
“That sounds fair to me,” Ranger agreed.
“Me too, as long as you promise not to destroy the envelope before we decide what to do, just to get your way,” Millie said.
“I wouldn’t do that,” Ranger challenged. Millie made a humming noise in the back of her throat letting him know that she didn’t believe him for a second. He’d do it and then tell her it was for her own good. Kind of like when he told her that he wasn’t jumping into bed with her again for her own good. She was sick to death of Ranger telling her the way things were going to be. He was the one who had decided to stop talking to her. He was the one who pushed her aside as if their night together meant nothing to him. It’s one of the reasons why she quit at McTavish. She loved her job there but working under Ranger with him not speaking to her, was almost too much.
“Let’s see what I can find,” the technician offered. She put the wand over the gel and moved it around. It felt cold and clammy on Millie’s skin as she spread it around, trying to get a good picture of the baby. She got to work, taking measurements, and assuring them both along the way that the baby looked good.
“Ah,” the technician breathed.
“Can you tell what we’re having?” Millie asked.
She smiled and nodded at Millie,” I can. I’ll write it down and give you each your own envelope. That way, you can make the decision together. Or, if you go your separate ways, you’ll still have your answer.”
“We aren’t going our separate ways,” Ranger insisted. “Millie’s moving in with me once we get back home.”
“I thought that we weren’t telling strangers our business,” Millie challenged.
“Right, sorry,” Ranger grumbled. “I just want you both to know that I’m in this for the long haul. I’m that kid’s father,” he said, pointing to the screen. “I plan on being here for him or her, and for you too, Millie, if you’ll allow it. I’m not going anywhere.” Hearing Ranger say those things to her gave her so much hope, but Millie had been hopeful before. The night that they shared gave her hope that something more was happening between the two of them than just sex, but she was wrong. He only wanted her for one night, but now, he was stuck with her forever. They’d forever be linked by the child that they created that one night together and they were going to have to find a way to get along somehow.