4. A Lonely Goddess
4
A Lonely Goddess
Aditi
A diti carefully slid her jewellery onto her lobe and screwed on the backing, giving her head a slight shake, happy to see her earrings dangle about prettily. Picking up the packet of bindi , she selected a simple round one in a dark maroon colour and applied it onto her forehead, bringing it to the centre of her brows.
“Is that so? And then what did Appa say?” she asked, listening to her sister’s voice trickling through the speaker on her phone. Her younger sister, Anika, was catching her up on all that she had missed with her family. This was their usual Sunday morning ritual, and despite being in different cities, they had refused to give up on the joys of sisterly gossip.
She laughed as Anika imitated their father’s irritated grunting when cornered by Paati , their maternal grandmother who also resided with them. The suburbs of Bangalore had been home to Aditi and her family since she was a young child. With nearly all their extended relatives also living in the same city or nearby, she had never had a dearth of company while she’d been growing up.
This was the first time she’d been away from her family members for an extended period of time. As much as she missed them, sometimes she found herself breathing a little easier at the lack of constant focus on her and her life.
“I miss you,” came Anika’s small voice, cutting into her thoughts, and immediately, Aditi’s guilt ramped up.
“I miss you, too, Anu,” she said softly, smiling at her sister on video. “I’ll see you in a couple months for Amma and Appa’s anniversary party.”
“Are you sure you won’t forget me by then? You weren’t even paying attention before,” Anu grumbled.
“I’m trying to get ready for the temple. I promised Nanamma I’d join her. It’s some auspicious day today.”
Anu nodded. “Paati is making us all go also. I just hope we don’t run into the Hebbar family again. I cannot stand Mrs. Hebbar.”
Aditi stopped midway in the application of her lip balm. “You met her recently?” she asked, her focus now on her sister.
“Yes.” Anu frowned, looking like thunder. “Amma and I saw her at the market a couple days ago. She was boasting about all the proposals she is getting for her son and Amma was fuming. I don’t know why you ever dated that fool.”
“I know you don’t like Harish,” she started, only to be interrupted by her annoyed sister.
“Even street dogs don’t like Harish. Other people named Harish don’t like Harish!”
“Anu!” she admonished, unable to hold back a chuckle. “No matter how mad you are, please don’t mention to Amma and Appa that Harish is in Mumbai too, okay? They’ll make me come home otherwise.”
“I cannot believe that he got into the same program as you.”
Aditi grimaced, nodding in agreement. She’d been delighted at her acceptance into the rotation at Sanjog Hospital with the mentor she had wanted. It had come as an unpleasant surprise to see that she would have to work alongside Harish Hebbar, her ex.
Aditi and Harish had dated each other in medical college. Young and naively in love, she had hoped to marry him once they graduated, planning on working on their post-graduate doctoral degrees together. Nearly three years into dating, she had finally admitted this to her parents who, despite their conservative outlook, had agreed to meet with the Hebbars to finalise a proposal. They were all part of the same social circle, and Aditi had been hopeful that despite the differences in their language and background, both families would find a way to come together for the sake of their kids.
In the end, it was Harish who had broken that dream and blown it to smithereens.
Aditi looked back on that outcome with relief.
She had no doubts whatsoever that marriage to Harish would have given her only two things—mental health issues, and an ugly divorce.
She supposed she should be thankful that the only side effect she was still experiencing from that embarrassing episode in her life was the pressure to get married soon, and well.
Both families had been in silent competition ever since the break up. The mothers would inevitably exchange barbed comments when they met in any social setting, gloating over which of their children was more in demand on the marriage market.
For that reason alone, Aditi was glad to be living away from home for a few months. She didn’t like feeling like she was about to be auctioned off to the highest bidder at any given moment. Not that she had much respite from thinking about grooms even here, she accepted grimly, brushing her hair as she absentmindedly nodded at something Anika said .
Meeting more suitable men that her parents had picked had been one of the conditions she’d agreed to in order to be allowed to come to Mumbai alone.
It seemed silly that as a twenty-six-year-old educated woman, she still required her parent’s approval for this. But in a culture that discouraged girls from leaving their homes unless their destination was their husband’s house, she knew it was a reality that thousands of other women like her dealt with every day. At least her family loved her immensely. It made it a little easier to put up with the many restrictions she still operated under, knowing that these limitations came from a place of sincere care.
“Adi?” Anika called, bringing her attention back.
“Hmm?” Aditi stood up, adjusting her dupatta along her shoulder before picking up her phone once more.
“Are you okay with having to see Harish everyday?”
“I can’t be bothered with him anymore, Anu,” she replied, pulling a pair of matching sandals that she’d left at the foot of her bed. “Maybe extra prayers at the temple will work today and I’ll find myself a good guy in Mumbai.”
“You do that, and don’t let Harish stress you out! You’re eating well, aren’t you?” She heard the worry in Anu’s query.
“Yes, yes, I’m eating. I won’t forget.” Aditi pacified her sister, listening to the same lines that she’d been told to repeat as a mantra if ever she was tempted to skip her meals.
“Remember, your body is your temple!” Anika chirped.
“Okay, if my body is a temple then where is the devotee who’s supposed to worship at my altar? I’m a lonely goddess, wilting away,” Aditi grumbled, pushing her foot into her sandals, letting out a frustrated grunt when it slipped off again.
In a hurry, she picked up her phone and shoe both, irritatedly thrusting the phone under her chin, keeping it held against her collar while she fumbled with the strap. “It’s been so long since I’ve been worshipped, I’m forgetting what sex feels like.”
Just as she said this, she turned and gasped, finding Rian standing stock still at the doorway to her bedroom. She straightened immediately, uncaring that her phone slipped down her front and toppled onto the floor, face down, the video on it hidden from her view.
Aditi barely registered her sister’s dull hellos after that, nor the click of the call ending, her entire attention on this man who had appeared out of nowhere.
“Nanamma’s waiting in the car,” he said, his expression indecipherable.
Aditi had no idea what to do with that information.
Why was Rian here? Did he hear her say that she can’t remember sex?
MOTHER EARTH SWALLOW ME WHOLE!
Rian stared at Aditi for a second, and then, as though having made up his mind, walked into her bedroom instead of walking away. Without a word, he reached for the shoe.
“May I?” he asked, his voice low.
Aditi nodded mutely.
Rian bent down on one knee and wrapped his long fingers about her ankle, lifting it to slide her naked foot into her sandal. Bracing her hand on his shoulder automatically for support, Aditi felt a strange shiver pass through her at the feel of his roughened fingers against the delicate arch of her foot. It was a gentle graze, and suddenly, instead of the gurgle of embarrassment, there was an uncomfortable clench of desire swirling at the pit of her belly.
It was no great effort for her to accept that Rian was a prime specimen of masculine beauty. Tall, broad shouldered, and handsome beyond measure with equal parts charm and broodiness. He was like a character who’d escaped the pages of the romantic novels she devoured in her free time.
This was before they’d even made peace .
Now that he’d stopped avoiding her existence altogether, she’d begun to see flashes of his dimpled grin and it never failed to spark a flutter within her gut, like a butterfly had been let loose.
They’d developed an oddly teasing relationship over the last couple weeks since their truce. Not a friendship quite yet, but no longer the awkward tension of before. They shared meals if they were both around with Nanamma, spoke about random things, and often found themselves watching TV together late at night to wind down.
She’d thought the initial spark she had experienced with him—primarily physical—would fade. He was a nice man, but obviously not interested in her.
It took just this light touch, this unexpected moment, for attraction to come knocking at her door again. When did wearing shoes start feeling so intimate? She wondered dazedly, trying to recollect her wits. She gaped at his dark head as he delicately wrapped the flimsy strap around her ankle and straightened the tassels.
A man like Rian, at her feet, worshipping her. Like she’d just been wishing.
The butterfly turned into a swarm and her stomach lurched.
Rian glanced up, and it was all Aditi could do to remain standing. From this viewpoint, he was easily imaginable as a fallen angel, waiting for her to command his services.
Aditi’s chest grew tight as he held her gaze, slowly unfolding to his full height, and she had to tilt her head back to meet his eyes. Fuck, the height difference made him hotter.
Yep, she was definitely starved for sex if the simple touch of a very good-looking man made her hormones go on a rampage. Either that, or she was getting close to her cycle. Her sexual cravings usually ramped up in the days leading to her periods.
Breath stuck, she waited, wondering what he was thinking.
Probably not about periods , the imp in her head chimed.
“Let’s go,” he said after a moment, breaking into her silent spiral .
Demurely, she followed him out of the apartment and into the elevator, hating the fact that she felt so tongue tied.
The entire way down to the parking lot, Aditi kept sneaking glances at Rian, wanting to ask him but also dreading his response. Annoyed by the impossibility of her position, she whipped towards him as they neared his car.
“You heard me, didn’t you?” she accused, knowing she was right when his nostrils flared. One edge of his mouth trembled, as if itching to laugh openly.
“It’s like riding a bike, Doc,” he said instead. Light-grey eyes stared down at her, brimming with ill-concealed mirth, the slightest smirk on his lips.
Confused by the seemingly unrelated comment, she scrunched her nose. “What is?”
“Sex,” he answered simply, opening the car door for her.