Chapter 5
Koa
“I’m sorry if I put you on the spot the other day.”
I faltered a bit with the pan of chicken parm I was holding at the sound of Knox’s voice.
“Hold that thought for a sec,” I told him, then quickly focused on getting dinner in the oven.
There hadn’t been a chance to talk to Knox about the things he’d implied a few nights ago. Hell, I still hadn’t decided if I should even bring it up to him. But now that he was the one broaching the subject, I was glad to help him figure it out.
Once the food was in and the timer started, I turned to Knox. He was sitting on one of the barstools and fiddling with the hem of his hoodie. I leaned on the counter and waited for him to continue.
He didn’t speak immediately, but I had patience. That was one thing you learned quickly when dealing with the St. James siblings. If you pushed them, they shut down. I’d become an expert at waiting them out.
I knew why Knox had chosen to bring this up now.
Riot was at the studio getting some work done, and he had brought Wynter and Hawk with him.
Wynter so she could work on her own projects, and Hawk because he loved Cara.
She had all kinds of sensory toys that he loved and could keep him occupied for hours.
And if he did become overstimulated, then she had a blanket fort set up in the corner and a tablet with his favorite movies.
Storm was taking his afternoon nap, while Cruz, Rue, and Bel were playing Minecraft in their room.
Finally, Knox looked up and met my eyes. “I know you love Riot.”
My breath caught in my throat. “Of course I do. I love all of you,” I replied carefully.
Knox rolled his eyes, not believing my bullshit. “That’s not what I mean and you know it.”
There was no point denying it. I took a deep breath, hoping he couldn’t see the tension in my shoulders. “Okay . . . ” I prompted, hoping he’d continue.
Knox huffed, slouching back in his chair.
“I know you’re in love with him, and I think he’s in love with you too, even if he doesn’t realize it.
I’m sick and tired of y’all bouncing around each other.
But also, I know it’s not my business, and I shouldn’t have put you on the spot with the Frieren comment.
Though, Riot is so fucking oblivious, it didn’t matter. ”
My shoulders shook with amusement. “You’re right.
But yeah, I did feel uncomfortable. I have my reasons for keeping my feelings to myself.
And I get how you might not understand them, but at the end of the day, it’s mine and Riot’s relationship, not yours.
Thanks for apologizing, Knox. It means a lot. ”
“For the record, I think you’re both idiots, but I’ll leave it alone, at least for now.” He grinned playfully at me.
Before I could respond, the baby monitor went off, Stormy crying as he woke up from his nap.
“Well, the peace was good while it lasted,” Knox muttered, but I knew he didn’t actually mind being around the younger ones. He was a good fucking kid.
I left the kitchen and headed toward Storm and Hawk’s bedroom. Storm was standing up in his crib, his honey-colored hair sticking up in all different directions, face scrunched in annoyance.
“Hi, Stormy boy. Did you have a good nap?”
“Up!” Storm cried.
“Coming, sweetie. Do you need a diaper change?”
Storm didn’t answer, of course, but practically leaped into my arms as I picked him up out of the crib.
He did, in fact, need a diaper change, so I went over to the dresser that had a changing pad secured to it and made fast work of the dirty one.
I was snapping up his onesie when the doorbell rang.
I frowned, wondering who that could be. We didn’t get a lot of unexpected guests.
The last time I remembered someone just showing up here had been nearly two years ago, when CPS had shown up with Cruz after his mother had voluntarily relinquished him to the state since she could no longer take care of him.
“I’ll get it,” Knox yelled from the other room.
“Are you thirsty, Storm? Do you want some milk?”
“Duice and ‘ookies.”
I kissed his cheek, loud and annoying, making him laugh. “You can have a little juice, but no cookies. It’s almost dinner. How about some apples?”
“Apples!” He was so easy to please sometimes.
“Okay.” I placed him on the floor and took his hand. “Let’s get you a snack.”
“What the fuck are you doing here?” Knox’s voice was dark and deeper than I’d ever heard it. Dangerous. Something was wrong. “You need to leave now.” I could hear him loud and clear despite being upstairs.
I didn’t waste another second. I scooped Storm up in my arms and rushed out of the room.
Theirs was the farthest down the hallway, so I couldn’t look down the stairs to see what was going on.
Cruz and the twins’ room was the closest to the stairway, and they’d clearly heard Knox because they were all crowding the hallway.
“W-what’s going on?” Cruz asked when he saw me. He sounded terrified. The twins were silent, even Rue, which was alarming.
“It’s okay. I’m going to see. Can you take Storm please?”
Cruz didn’t hesitate, reaching for his younger brother. “I want all of you to stay in your room, okay? Lock the door and do not come out until either Knox or I say you can. Understand?”
“What’s happening?”
The voices were getting louder downstairs. I could hear mostly Knox, but there was the muffled sound of someone responding to him.
“I don’t know. But it’ll be okay. Go back in your room and stay there, got it?”
I could see that Rue wanted to argue, but Bel grabbed his arm, shaking his head slightly. “We will,” he told me, his voice quiet. Cruz nodded, and finally the four of them went back inside. I waited till I heard the door lock before rushing down the stairs.
Knox was in the doorway, using his full size to block whoever was on the other side. Even from here, I could see the tension in his body. The closer I got, the more I could see him shaking, even as he held his ground.
“What’s going on here?” I boomed, coming to stand directly behind Knox.
“Who the fuck are you?” My eyes fell onto the man at the doorway. He was probably in his early forties. He had dark, curly hair and dark eyes. He had gang tattoos running up his neck, peeking out from the collar of the leather jacket he was wearing.
“I should be asking you that question.” I very carefully pushed Knox so he was behind me and I was between him and the perceived threat. Knox was vibrating with anger and so focused, I wasn’t sure he even realized I was there, and I didn’t want to startle him.
“Knox, tell this asshole to let me in. I want to see my daughter!”
Daughter. This was Wynter’s father, Aren. Immediately, I could understand why Knox was reacting the way he was. The first thing Riot had done when he’d learned that Aren Azarian was out of jail was get a restraining order against him. One he was violating by being at our door.
“Fuck you!” Knox screamed over my shoulder.
I reached my hand out behind me, trying to calm him. Aren attempted to push around me, but the effort was laughable. I had about half a foot on this fucker and probably close to fifty pounds. He wasn’t going anywhere.
“Knox,” I said, my voice icily calm. “Can you please call 911? Tell them Aren Azarian is here and in violation of his restraining order.”
Aren’s eyes widened in surprise. He might not remember me, and I’d be honest, I hadn’t recognized him immediately either—he looked a lot different—but now I knew exactly who he was.
He featured in one of the memories that would haunt me for the rest of my life.
Wynter had been four, Knox eight, and Riot sixteen.
Aren had been high as fuck and had tried to smother Wynter with a pillow.
Riot had gotten her away, and he and Aren had beat the fuck out of each other.
Knox had grabbed Wynter and run barefoot with his little sister all the way to my house for help.
By the time I’d gotten to the scene, Riot had been unconscious and barely breathing.
I’d broken Aren’s arm by throwing him through the wall.
“Wait, that’s not necessary. I’m not here to cause trouble. I only wanna see my kid.”
“Yeah, well, that’s not gonna happen, so I suggest you leave now. You must still be on parole, right? I gotta imagine a restraining order violation is against the terms.”
Aren’s eyes narrowed in annoyance. He opened his mouth to say something, but then I saw when the recognition clicked. “You! You’re the asshole who broke my arm.”
I grinned, but it wasn’t pleasant. Straightening my shoulders, I utilized my full height. I was a big guy, but I tried not to use it to intimidate often. Of course, there were exceptions.
My one hand was still behind my back, and Knox took me by surprise when he slipped his into mine. His fingers were clammy, and I could feel the tremors running through him. He wasn’t just angry; he was terrified. I squeezed reassuringly.
“And you’re the asshole who tried to smother your daughter and nearly killed my husband. I gotta say, you got off easy.”
“Husband?”
I didn’t acknowledge his question. It was none of his business. “You have three seconds, Azarian, before I call the cops.” Aren didn’t move. “One . . . two . . .” I pulled out my phone.
“Okay, okay! I’m fucking leaving. I only wanted to talk, Jesus. I’m clean now. Did my time. I want to see my daughter. It’s my right.”
I unlocked the phone. “Fuck.” He ran his hand through his hair. “I’m fucking going. But you tell Wynter I was askin’ about her. And you tell Riot that this isn’t over. He can’t keep my kid from me!”
Aren walked away, getting into an older model Honda that was parked on the road. I didn’t blink until he sped away. Didn’t breathe until I could no longer see the car.
I didn’t move immediately. I knew once I turned around, I’d have to be in Dad mode.
Knox was barely holding it together. The boys were upstairs and probably scared out of their minds.
There were cops to call, and social workers, and I needed to get Riot back here.
But if I didn’t take a moment to get my anger under control, I’d never be able to do any of those things.
The kids were the priority, but seeing that fucker again had brought me back to that night, to how fucking scared I’d been when I’d sped in my aunt’s car to Riot’s trailer.
I could hear the fighting from outside, and I’d had no idea what I’d be walking into.
I wondered if this would be the time that things went too far and Riot wouldn’t make it.
And for a second, when I saw his limp body lying there, Azarian still pounding his fist into his face, I’d thought that it was.
I’d thought it was the last time I’d ever see my best friend.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, pushing back all the memories. Riot was safe. Wynter was safe. That would never happen again. I wouldn’t allow it.
I turned around and faced Knox.
“Koa—” His voice broke.
“Oh, c’mere, kiddo. It’s okay.” Knox launched himself into my arms, his fingers clawing into my shirt, fisting the fabric. I held him tight and gently got us out of the doorway, kicking the door behind me. “I got you, Knox. He’s gone.”
Knox sobbed, and I knew he was remembering that night too. “You’re safe. They’re all safe. He’s gone.”
“He can’t see Wynter, Koa. He just can’t.”
“I know. He won’t. You know Riot and I won’t allow it.
” I prayed that I wasn’t lying to the kid, that we would be able to keep him away.
If Azarian went the legal route, I didn’t know what would happen, but we would do everything we could to keep the asshole away.
I didn’t care if he’d served his time. He wasn’t getting anywhere near my family.
It took a while for Knox to finally untangle himself from me, but when he did, he was no longer crying. He wiped away the stray tears with the back of his hand and straightened his shoulders. When Knox met my eyes, he was full of determination. “So what next?”
I couldn’t help but smile. I was so fucking proud of this kid, and his protectiveness of his family nearly rivaled Riot’s.
“Next, we let the boys out of their room and call Riot. Then we do everything we can to keep Aren Azarian away.”