Chapter 26 Nova
Nova
When I’m done showering and I step out into the hallway, I glance at Rachel’s bedroom.
Taking a deep breath, I walk inside, and when I smell her scent lingering in the air, my heart constricts.
Hi, Rach.
I walk to her dressing table and look at all the flash drives. Just needing to be close to her, I sort them into neat little stacks before I look through the envelopes.
Lainey’s 1st birthday without me.
Lainey’s 1st Christmas without me.
Lainey’s 12th birthday.
There are letters going up until Lainey turns twenty-one, and ones for when she starts dating, her prom, her wedding, and when she has her first child.
Rachel thought of everything.
When I look at the next envelope, it’s addressed to Easton, and the last one has my chin quivering.
Nova. Open after I’ve self-destructed.
I let out a sputter, something between a burst of laughter and a sob.
God, I miss your sense of humor.
With the letter in my hand, I walk to her bed and sit down on it. Folding my legs beneath me, I reach for the bedside table and grab the box of tissues. I place it on my lap before I open the envelope. My hands tremble as I unfold the page, and then I can’t read the words fast enough.
Hi bestie,
I’m sorry for the epic disappearing act I threw on you. Trust me, I didn’t want to leave you.
I suck in a quivering breath while blinking like a crazy person to keep my sight from blurring.
I need you to listen to me. Okay?
I know your love language is acts of service, but girl, you need to start putting yourself first. Please. Do it for me.
Don’t weave your entire life around Lainey. I want you to love my daughter and be a mother to her, but I also want you to be happy.
If you haven’t yet, go to Easton and tell him you love him. I promise your heart will be safe with him. He’ll never hurt you, and he’ll give you the life you deserve.
A sob bursts over my lips, and I have to stop reading for a moment.
I’ve been wishing that I could talk to Rachel because I knew she would tell me what to do, and all this time, this letter has been lying on her dressing table.
Rachel understood me so well.
And while I’m asking favors, can you do me a big one? Can you always show Easton and Lainey to appreciate the little things so they don’t get swept up in all the glam?
Love them, Nova. Love them for both of us.
Also, you’ll see I’ve packed all my clothes. You’re welcome to take whatever you want. Especially the Dolce & Gabbana dress I wore to the Oscars when Easton won Best Actor. It’s my favorite, and I think you’ll look beautiful in it.
And for the love of God, please use my handbags. I spent a lot of time building the collection. Just let Lainey have the first pick, then you can go crazy. I hope you’ll think of me when you wear my clothes.
I think that’s everything.
If there is a way for me to watch over you, I’ll find it, so if you feel a sudden burst of love, that’s me hugging you.
I love you, Nova.
Thank you for being my best friend until the end.
Rach.
With tissues squashed to my nose, I reread the letter over and over while I sob my heart out.
I lie down on her bed and press my face into her pillow. Smelling Rachel, a sense of calm washes over me, and my sobs eventually lessen.
I promise I’ll live every day to the fullest in memory of you, Rach.
I take a few more breaths of her scent before I sit up again. I carefully tuck my letter back into the envelope. Climbing off the bed, I grab Easton’s letter and leave the room.
I head downstairs, and when I get close to the couch, Easton glances up. Instantly, worry tightens his features. “What’s wrong?”
I hold the envelope out to him. “Rachel wrote you a letter. I was going through the flash drives and envelopes when I found them.”
“Them?”
“She wrote one for me as well, hence my swollen eyes.”
He sets the script down, and while he takes the envelope, he stands up. “Thanks, Nova.”
I watch as he walks out onto the veranda before I take a seat on the couch.
Easton
I stare at Rachel’s handwriting, trying to build up the courage to read her last words to me. Over the past few weeks, I’ve done my best not to break down because I know she would have hated it.
I open the letter, and the instant I begin to read, my jaw clenches hard, and tears prick my eyes.
Hi, Easton.
I know I’ve said it a million times before, but damn, I totally won the lottery in the brother department. You are such an incredible man that you made it impossible for me to find love.
I compared every idiot I dated to you, and obviously, they paled in comparison. I want you to teach Lainey everything you taught me. Don’t let her settle for anyone who doesn’t measure up to your standards.
Now, let’s talk about Nova. Don’t let our world dim her light.
And for the love of God, if you haven’t told her how you feel about her yet, then get a move on. Life is too short to wait for the perfect moment.
Nova loves you. I’m breaking my promise to my best friend, but I feel it’s something you need to know. She’ll be scared to start a relationship with you, and she’ll put Lainey first. It’s Nova’s nature to sacrifice her own happiness for others, and it’s up to you to make sure she doesn’t.
I hate to admit it, but I’m pretty sure she loves you more than me and Lainey combined. Don’t let her slip through your fingers, or I swear, I will haunt you.
Shocked, I reread the words. I know Nova is attracted to me and she cares, but reading that she loves me is the final push I needed.
Come hell or high water, I’m going to keep fighting for a relationship with Nova.
Let’s get back to you. I wish you everything that’s beautiful in this life. I hope you get to become a father and hold your own baby in your arms. (Even better if Nova’s the mother)
PS. You’re not getting any younger. Just thought I’d remind you.
God, what else can I tell the man who’s taught me everything I know? Who’s given me the world? Who’s loved me so unconditionally since the day I was born, I’m sure I’ll still feel it in the afterlife?
Thank you isn’t enough.
It will never be enough.
I love you, Easton.
Your baby sister, Rach.
I let out a shuddering breath and wipe the tears from my cheeks before I glance out over the yard that’s lit up with garden lights.
I love you, Rach.
A breeze plays around me, and I inhale a calming breath. Exhaling slowly, I fold the letter and tuck it back into the envelope.
Thinking about what Rachel wrote to me, I’m sure she wrote something similar for Nova.
God, I hope so. If there’s one person Nova will listen to, it’s my sister.
Climbing to my feet, I head back into the house. Nova’s sitting on the couch, her eyes instantly locking on my face. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” Instead of grabbing Nova and kissing the ever-loving shit out of her and forcing her to agree to dating me, I take a seat on the other couch. “Want to watch a movie? Maybe Twilight?”
She lets out a chuckle. “You’re willing to sit through Twilight with me?”
The corner of my mouth lifts as I look at the woman I love. “Only if you make popcorn.”
“It’s a deal.”
I watch as she gets up and walks to the kitchen. Her body seems tense, and she keeps shooting glances my way.
“Everything okay?” I ask.
Her eyes flit to me again. “Yes. Of course.” The moment she’s done answering me, she looks away.
She’s nervous.
Once Nova heads back to the living room with the popcorn, I grab the remote and switch on the TV. She holds out the bowl to me, but I ignore it and take hold of her arm so I can tug her down beside me.
The moment her butt touches the couch, I wrap my arm around her shoulders and pull her closer so she’ll lean against me. “Try to relax.”
“I am relaxed,” the words burst from her.
No, you’re not, beautiful, but it’s something I’ll work on with you.
I press play, and as the movie begins, I grab some popcorn from the bowl. When I bring a kernel to Nova’s mouth, her eyes dart to my face. Her lips part, and getting to feed her makes me grow hard at the speed of light.
Desire ignites in her eyes, but she tries to hide it from me by focusing on the movie.
It’s only a matter of time. You’re already mine. You just need to realize it.
It takes more restraint than I thought I possessed not to take what I want. Instead, I settle for wrapping my arm around Nova’s front and pulling her back until she’s leaning against my chest. I brush my fingers up and down her arm while fighting the urge to kiss my way up her neck.
The memory of kissing Nova fills my mind, and remembering her moans and how she said my name like it was a prayer has me growing even harder.
Jesus, I’m going to die of blue balls at this rate.
I suck in a deep breath and try to watch the movie, but it’s impossible.
Holding Nova and not acting on my desire and feelings becomes the sweetest torture I’ve ever had to endure.