Chapter 29
29
Zach
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
He was panicking, and he knew it, but he didn’t know what else to do. The words were out of his mouth before he could think about them. Before he could stop them. He didn’t do well on his feet.
Krista had told his parents he had a girlfriend? Was that what she’d said? No, she wouldn’t have told them that. Whatever she’d said to his mom, his mom had misinterpreted.
And now he’d just introduced Amy as his girlfriend.
Fuck.
She’d gone still beside him, but at least she hadn’t immediately contradicted him and told his mom that he’d just lied to her.
“Oh, it’s so nice to meet you!” His mom held her hand out to Amy, who took it, smiling weakly. “Oh, you’re so pretty! Isn’t she pretty, Stuart?”
“Last time I told you another woman was pretty, I had to hear about it for a year, so I’m just going to keep quiet this time,” his dad said cheerfully, coming up behind his mom. He eyed Zach. “No offense, but I’ll skip the hug this time, son.”
Both of them were dressed for church, which they must have just come from.
“What are you doing here?” he asked, feeling a little desperate. He needed to know what they wanted so he could make them leave. Immediately. Preferably before Kincaid got back. Fuck. Forget sweating over the bushes; he was pretty sure the wetness on his skin was no longer due to the water Amy had just sprayed him with. He was leaking nerves out of every single one of his pores.
“Oh, you didn’t get my text? I was going through the back closet when I found a box of your books this morning, and I remembered you telling me that you were looking for one of them a few months ago.” His mom turned to frown at his dad. “Stuart, you didn’t bring the books.”
“Well, I wanted to come meet Zach’s girlfriend first.” His dad grinned at Amy, who smiled back weakly. “I’m Stuart, Zach’s dad. Did Lauren introduce herself?”
“Um, yes,” Amy lied. She cast a glance at Zach, which he ignored, keeping his arm slung around her shoulder. As soon as his parents left, he’d explain everything. Then he’d call Mistress Julie right away and see how soon she could talk to him because he needed to get this whole hot mess sorted asap.
Before it blew up in his face.
“Sort of,” he told his dad. “Here, let me get the books, then Amy and I need to get inside and get cleaned up. We’ve been gardening this morning.”
“Of course, we won’t keep you.” His mom peered over his shoulder. “Is that nice boy still living here, too?”
“Um, yes, Kincaid is still living here, too, but he’s out right now.” Zach stepped away from Amy, making a subtle movement with his arms to try to herd his parents toward their car. “We’ll have you over some time. Soon.”
“Oh, that would be lovely,” his mom said, brightening. Since he’d just offered her something she wanted, she didn’t put up a fight about moving away, though, of course, she did have one last thing to say to Amy first. “I can’t wait to get to know you better, dear.”
“Um, me, too.” Amy waved, a strained smile on her face.
Fuck. He was going to need to apologize to her as well as explain to her.
“She’s so pretty, and she seems nice, though I don’t know if I approve of you hauling her around over your shoulder like that in public, dear,” his mom said quietly as they approached her car. “That’s more for indoor activities.”
“In my defense, she had just sprayed me with the hose.”
“Ah, is that how you got all wet?” His mom’s lips twitched. “I like her.”
“Me, too.” At least that part wasn’t a lie. “We’ll have you over for dinner soon and talk about… everything. Okay?”
“Sounds good, sweetheart.” His mom went up on her tiptoes to give him a kiss.
“Here,” his dad said, lifting a small box out of the car and hiking it up on his hip before reaching up with his other hand to close the trunk. “Are you sure you want to carry this while you’re that wet?”
“I’m sure the water won’t work its way through the cardboard that quickly,” Zach reassured him. Even if it did, he would rather have completely waterlogged books than have his parents stay here one second longer than they needed to. “Thanks for bringing them over.”
“Of course.” His dad winked at him. “Have fun with your girl.”
Oh, fuck. That was probably why his parents were so willing to leave. They thought they’d just interrupted his and Amy’s foreplay. That’s why his mom had told him to keep things inside. He was so panicked, his brain wasn’t working properly.
“Thank you.” It was the only thing he could say. “I’ll call you guys later.”
“Of course. Bye!” His parents waved to him, then his mom waved to Amy as they pulled away. Zach turned around to see that she was turning off the water to the hose, though she did lift her hand to wave goodbye to his parents.
Pure relief slammed through him as he glanced up and down the street. Kincaid was nowhere in sight. He’d gotten through it. Somehow. He could have cried.
Except he didn’t have time to enjoy his relief because Amy was storming toward him, and she was pissed.
“What the fuck was that?!” She shouted the words at him from halfway down the yard.
He stepped back, physically taken aback, because he didn’t think he’d ever heard her cuss before. Not even on her wedding day at Jeremy or Noelle.
Having her curse at him wasn’t on his bingo card.
“I… thank you for covering for me,” he said, not entirely sure what had set her off like that.
“Thank you for letting you use me as a beard, you mean.” She stopped about ten feet away from him, hands balled into fists, as though she couldn’t get any closer or she might try to hit him. “Your parents think I’m your girlfriend? I knew you hadn’t told them about Kincaid yet, but that’s one thing. Telling them I’m your girlfriend? Are you serious ?”
“I didn’t tell my mom that, she assumed… I’m sorry, okay? I panicked. I didn’t know what to do!” Now his voice was rising, too, some of the pent-up emotion coming out. Fuck. He was shaking so hard, he could barely hold on to the box, but he also couldn’t let it go. He clutched at it with both hands, like a teddy bear, except it was far less snuggly and far less comforting.
“You tell them the truth! That I’m not your girlfriend!” She threw her hands up in the air. “How are you this dense? All you had to say was no, Amy is just a friend. She’s not my girlfriend.”
“I know… I know… I just…”
“And now, what am I supposed to say to Kincaid? How are we supposed to tell him that your parents think that I’m your girlfriend?” Amy’s chest was heaving, and she looked on the verge of tears.
“We’re not! You can’t…” The panic was clawing its way back up his throat, making it harder and harder for him to think. Everything was falling apart. He didn’t know what to do. He wanted to run, but there was nowhere to go. He wanted to hide, but eventually, he’d have to come out and face this. “Just… I need a minute to think.”
If she heard him, Amy didn’t give him any indication.
“What do you mean we’re not? I’m not going to lie to Kincaid for you, Zach. You have to tell him! And you have to tell your parents that I’m not your girlfriend! You have to stop lying to everyone!”
The pounding in his head was so intense, he almost didn’t hear the quiet words from the side.
“He won’t.”
Amy’s face went pale, as white as Zach’s felt, and they turned as one. They’d been shouting at each other so intently, so distressed, they’d blocked everything out.
Including Kincaid’s approach.
He was pale. Stoic. Staring between Zach and Amy rather than looking at either of them.
“Kincaid…” Zach croaked his boyfriend’s name, taking a step toward him.
“Don’t.” Kincaid held up his hand. “Just don’t.”
Fuck. Amy whirled around, dashing back to the house, leaving Zach and Kincaid staring at each other.
Kincaid
Hell of a way to end a run. When he’d seen Amy and Zach facing off across the sidewalk, Zach holding a box, he hadn’t been able to figure out what the hell was going on. As soon as he’d gotten within earshot—which hadn’t been hard to do considering they’d been shouting at each other—it had only taken him a moment to realize what had happened.
Zach’s parents must have stopped by and seen Zach and Amy. Zach introduced Amy as his girlfriend. Amy hadn’t outed him, and now she was pissed.
Maybe the two of them could form a club.
The ‘We’re Fucking Pissed at Zach Marshall’ Club.
“My parents showed up and assumed, and I?—”
“I said don’t! ” Kincaid shouted, holding up his hand in the universal gesture for ‘stop.’ He was too fucking pissed right now to even attempt to try to understand or have sympathy for Zach’s position. He took a deep breath, lowering his voice back down. “Like Amy said, all you had to do was tell them she’s not your girlfriend. It’s not like you had to admit that you have a boyfriend.”
“Krista told them I was seeing someone! When they pulled up, Amy was over my shoulder, and I’d just slapped her ass. They would have thought I was cheating or something if I’d said she was just a friend.”
Heartsick sliced through Kincaid. “Well, weren’t you? We sure as hell never discussed you spanking her when I’m not around.”
“It wasn’t like that!”
“It never is with you, is it? You can’t have it both ways, Zach. At some point, you have to make a decision.”
Zach was paler than ever, clutching the box in front of him like a shield. Because that’s who Zach was. He was someone who always ducked behind a shield.
“I had, I was going to tell them, I promised Krista?—”
“Oh, you promised Krista that you were going to tell them, so now you were going to?” The heated rage that crawled up Kincaid’s spine took hold and wouldn’t let go. “The fact that you promised me wasn’t enough?”
“It’s not that! Krista told me that she was going to end up telling them if I didn’t!”
“Then you could have just told them, Zach. That was one of the options.” Kincaid threw his hands up in the air. “I don’t know why I would expect that of you, though. You never make a fucking decision. You’re so damn afraid of making the wrong decision, you’d rather not make one at all.”
“There’s nothing wrong with needing time to figure things out! I just want to tell them the right way.”
“There might not be a right way! And while there’s nothing wrong with needing time to figure things out, eventually time is up.” Kincaid huffed. Fuck, this hurt. Because he did want Zach to decide. He wanted Zach to choose. “I keep waiting and waiting along with you, and every day you wait, I hurt. Every day you wait, I feel less important to you. And you keep sitting there, waiting for something to happen so you can make the ‘right’ move or waiting for someone to do it for you. I wouldn’t be surprised if you let the month run out just so Krista had to be the one to tell your parents, and you didn’t have to.”
“Your parents supported you. You don’t understand.”
“My parents supported me, and I was still scared to tell them at first. That’s why I do understand.” Fuck it. He was done coddling Zach. “I understand being scared of losing your family. But either you have to tell them, or we can’t be together, no matter how long you put that off… that’s what the end result is always going to be. I’m willing to wait for a while, but I’m not willing to spend the rest of my life as your housemate.”
It was the same damn fight all over again. A little different. A little rawer, a little more vulnerable, a little more pointed. But the same damn fight.
“But I am telling them. Before the end of this month.”
“Because Krista gave you an ultimatum.”
“What do you want me to say, Kincaid? You wanted me to tell them? I’m going to tell them. I told my mom that we’d have dinner with her soon. I figured I’d tell her then. So, it’ll be even before the end of this month. And then I might lose my family, if you even care.”
“Of course, I care. And if you do, you’ll have me.” Even as he said the words, he knew it wouldn’t be the same. Couldn’t be the same. But they also couldn’t move forward unless Zach told them.
“Will I?”
Kincaid stared at him. That was the last thing he’d expected Zach to say. If he’d said that having Kincaid didn’t make up for the loss of his parents, that was something Kincaid could understand, but asking if Zach would have him?
“Why would you think you wouldn’t?”
“You already left me once.” The accusation hurled out like a knife. “You’re asking me to trade in my parents, who have never let me down, for someone who already left once.”
“I left because you weren’t going to tell them!”
“And what happens if we break up again?” Zach heaved in a huge breath, tears glistening in his eyes. “What if I give up everything for you and we break up? ”
Throwing his hands up in the air again, Kincaid shook his head. This hurt too much. He couldn’t argue against a hypothetical. He couldn’t reassure Zach that would never happen. Anything was possible. Did he think it would happen? No. But it wasn’t like he could promise it was impossible.
He didn’t know what to say, and it ended up being a moot point because Zach suddenly started in alarm, his gaze going beyond Kincaid. Spinning around, he turned to see Amy coming out the front door, still in the wet clothes that were clinging to her, carrying a suitcase.
“Amy—” They both said her name at the same time.
She held up her hand, in the same ‘stop’ gesture Kincaid had used, and kept moving toward her car.
“I can’t be here right now.”
“Amy—” He and Zach were like a fucking Greek chorus.
She came to a stop.
“No. Red.” She pointed at Kincaid and then at Zach. “And red. I cannot be here right now.”
They both stood there, helpless, as she got into her car and sped away. Kincaid stared after the car as it disappeared, feeling like they’d opened Pandora’s Box, but instead of keeping hope locked safely inside, they’d just let it escape.
Fuck.
He didn’t know what to say. Didn’t know what to do.
Maybe there wasn’t anything to say. Maybe the words didn’t exist.
Feeling incredibly numb, he turned away from Zach and walked into the house alone.