Chapter 10
CHAPTER TEN
“Let’s not do this,” Gabe said.
Let’s? Not? Do? This?
It was like he turned and looked the elephant in the room directly in the eye.
And it blushed. After all these years of their usual bickering, he just went ahead and acknowledged the hate between them?
Just like that? Can he even do that? Can he really just shut down their standard operating routine with a single sentence?
Well, apparently so, and it was clearly messing with Leo’s head, because he lost in the third round of the Australian Open to Sascha, who argued with the ump every chance he got and took his sweet time stepping up to the line between serves.
Leo knew these were tactics to distract him, and he did his best to stay in the zone, taking the match to a respectable four sets, but he couldn’t secure the win.
So, he did, unfortunately, have to fly home.
He spent the long flight back to Miami going over each of his three matches in his head, and with Brian, who then spent the remainder of the flight watching the entire Bridget Jones filmography.
Meanwhile, Gabe didn’t win his match after their run-in, either, exiting in the second round.
It’s not exactly rare for Gabe to get knocked out of a Slam early—Leo would be the first to tell anyone that—but he seemed particularly off in his match.
Leo would not be the first to tell anyone that he was glued to the TV in the gym, watching every point of Gabe’s match.
Gabe’s slices mostly sailed long, and his drop shots didn’t quite clear the net.
He fidgeted with his backward hat between points, too, like he’d done during their practice session.
Squirming in his seat on the plane, Leo thought about how much Gabe must be struggling with this new phase of his career.
How could he not be? People like Sascha are yelling about how he’s throwing his sexuality in their faces.
The hypocrisy of that comment is laughable.
Sascha has always had girlfriends in his public orbit, pointing up to them in his player’s box during matches, posting about them on Instagram, trotting them out at events.
And now, he can’t stop talking about his new engagement.
“We are so happy, and we can’t wait to start a family,” Sascha has said over and over in interviews. “This is what matters to me even more than tennis.”
Bullshit.
Just two years ago, Sascha was in a relationship with Liv LaRochelle, a Canadian player who, at that point, was still climbing the rankings, but had recently won Indian Wells, officially putting herself on the map.
Not long after, the two were spotted everywhere together, and hard-launched their relationship on Instagram with a selfie in Paris.
Sascha oozed arrogance whenever he had Liv on his arm, smiling proudly, showing her off like one of his trophies.
But that season continued to be a breakout one for her.
As soon as she started to win more trophies of her own—including her first Slam, Wimbledon—Leo started to see Sacha’s attitude change.
Whenever he caught one of Sascha’s post-match interviews, Leo noticed that journalists only asked Sascha about Liv.
By the end of the season, Liv had won more titles that year than Sascha had.
Then came the Forbes article that reported she had made more money than he did that year.
The next season, about a year into their relationship, it all came to a head.
In another interview, asked about his reaction to his girlfriend’s continued success for the umpteenth time, Sascha replied, feigning sincerity, “It is amazing to me, to see her achieve this, especially after all she has been through. The pregnancy with her last boyfriend, then losing the baby, then him leaving her. It was just awful.”
The reporters lurched forward in their chairs. No one knew about a pregnancy. Liv must have told Sascha in confidence. This was the beginning of a media frenzy that surrounded her everywhere she went.
Liv didn’t play the past two seasons. As far as Leo can tell, she has only said that she’s taking an indefinite mental health break from the tour. Her new sponsors dropped her. Her ranking dropped, too.
Sascha went on to win two more Slams.
The rest of the flight home, Leo thought about Liv, and Gabe, and how Sascha can say whatever he wants and nothing ever changes.
At most, he gets a slap on the wrist. His comments would certainly never get him banned from tennis.
The powers that be care too much about him bringing in fans and publicity and money.
So, he’ll continue to spew hate, and players like Liv and Gabe will continue to suffer for it. And Leo will continue to stay closeted.
“Can I have some wine, please?” Leo asked a flight attendant and then put on Bridget Jones’s Diary.
With the first Slam of the year in the books (another victory for Russia’s sweetheart, Sascha), a decent third-round appearance kicking off his season, Leo now has his sights set on the Delray Beach Open.
Gabe mentioned to Leo that he’ll be playing Delray, too, the event like a homecoming for both of them.
He desperately needs Gabe to stop getting in his head as he tries to bump his ranking back up this season, and he knows that staying out of Gabe’s head would be the right move, too.
Gabe has far too much to deal with already—he doesn’t need Leo getting on his case, too.
Yeah. Queers supporting queers. Or something.
It’s complicated. Maybe he can at least try to be on his best behavior around the guy.
But first, he has to make it out of this interview with Paul, yet another guy who truly tests Leo’s ability to be on his best behavior.
“The wife told me this shirt is ‘giving AARP,’ ” Paul says with air quotes that could be seen from space.
The shirt in question is a frumpy white polo with a stitched logo from Paul’s favorite golf course in Boca.
“Whatever that means. I told her, ‘Honey, we booked that trip to Yosemite last year with AARP, so you must think I look pretty majestic!’ ”
Paul’s wife is nearly half his age, if that wasn’t already clear.
Best behavior. Best behavior. Best behavior.
Leo is repeating this new mantra in his head as he sips his iced coffee, chuckling politely and waiting for Paul to stop blabbing so they can start recording and he can get back to training.
His dad is sitting in the swivel chair beside him, inside a studio at the Tennis Network offices in Miami.
Johnny hasn’t quite been himself since Leo got home from Australia.
And not just health-wise. Leo expected that Johnny would still be moving more slowly than usual, sometimes using the cane that stays in the hall closet unless he’s experiencing an MS flare-up.
There’s something else going on here, though.
There are no longer ten thousand miles between them, but his dad still feels distant.
“Now, Leo, how has it been on tour without your old man? Did the Australian swing feel different since it was the first time you were there with only Brian?” Paul asks a few minutes into the episode.
Leo’s been waiting for this question, but, with his dad right next to him, it still sets his teeth on edge.
He just has to stick to what he rehearsed, a diplomatic answer that both gives Brian credit for the incredible job he’s been doing and assures his dad that it’s not the same without him. No more, no less. Stick to the script.
“I said this in my Instagram post last fall, but my dad has been at all my matches since I first started playing tennis at five years old. So, of course it hasn’t felt the same without him,” Leo says, making sure to turn to his dad and give him a caring smile.
Okay, sweet. This is going well. “But Brian is doing a great job, I have to say. He has that cool, tough exterior everyone knows him for, but can be a real goofball when you spend more time with him one-on-one. Overall, he really is stepping up. He’s trying new things, letting me play with more freedom and risk. ”
Right. So, that was the verbal equivalent of making Brian a friendship bracelet directly in front of his dad. Great work.
“What kinds of new things?” Paul asks. “Practicing with Gabe Montoya? That was certainly something new for you, training with your rival. And, now, the first homosexual player in ATP history.”
“Well, the first player to come out as gay in ATP history,” Leo says.
“But yeah, that was something Brian set up ahead of AO. He was just hoping to pair me with somebody who plays really opposite from how I do, study him outside of a match. Maybe even”—Leo practically gags on these next words—“learn a little from his variety to help round out my game this season.”
“So, right, let’s get into this season. You went to the third round at the Australian Open. Were you happy with that result?” He pulls off his glasses, fogs them up, and cleans them with his polo.
“You know, I was,” Leo says. “Putting together a couple solid wins felt great after my hiatus. I told myself going into Australia that I would at least win a couple matches, and I did that.”
“But we’re hoping for more than a couple at the other Slams,” Johnny chimes in, and Leo’s brow furrows. “I’m planning to come back on tour with Leo and get things back on the right track.”
“That is so wonderful to hear, Johnny,” Paul says. “I know I speak for all my listeners when I say you’re just so inspiring.” Whoomp, there it is. “Even suffering from MS, and now from a stroke, you’ve managed to bounce back and plan to get out on the court again.”
“He doesn’t suffer, he just has it,” Leo mutters.
“Say again?” Paul asks.
“I, uh, well, I just said that he doesn’t suffer from MS, he just has MS.”
Johnny shoots Leo a look that unsettles his nerves again.