Chapter 17 #3
I thought he wasn’t being dramatic, but here he is blowing my mind with a look but being so damn casual, like we’re talking about buying a different flavor of cookies at the store.
I don’t know what to say. And I suspect they both realize I need a minute or two to take in what he said.
Neither rushes to fill in the quiet, letting me run over everything they said and figure out how I feel.
I sense that they both want to keep talking and sharing and discussing, but they don’t push it.
I’m sure they can see I’ve got more questions than answers; some are things I need to sort out by myself, and others do probably involve them, but through it all, they wait for me to be the one to speak again.
“Why are you here, Kade?” I ask softly, plucking dog hair off my leggings as a way of avoiding getting lost in his eyes.
“You’re my friend, Quinny.”
I huff a small laugh under my breath at the way he throws my words back at me. But there’s no malice in the tone he uses, because there’s no malice in Kade.
“I’m not here in a professional capacity. I can stay for as long as you need, so you have someone you trust near you.”
I tip my head, not looking at him but making it easy for him to see my expression. “You get we’re currently in Sergey Petrov’s house, right? He is Russian Bratva. How do I know I can trust you?” I stop avoiding looking at him.
“I don’t care about Petrov; I care about you.
Your question about trust? That’s a hard one, and I’m not sure if anything I say would help.
Only you can decide if you trust me. I want you to, don’t get me wrong, but I’m not pushing you, because I know I really, truly, terribly screwed up.
I hurt you when I lied. I’m sorry I lied, Quinny.
I promise I’m only here as your friend.”
I can see everything he’s not saying, but I can see he’s listening, too, and in a way, he’s telling me what I want to hear.
For now, at least, because there’s also a determination in his eyes that wasn’t there before.
We’re not friends—we have never been just friends—but if that’s how we both label the deep-seated bond we share, then perhaps it's okay, given the circumstances.
The same could be said about the connection I have with Santiago. We’re not strangers, and despite not knowing anything about him, I feel like I know enough.
I stand up and put the kettle on, needing to keep busy while I work through their suggestion that we twist our relationships and fake being acquaintances only. “Coffee?”
Of course, they both take their coffee the same way I do.
Can the universe make it any more obvious?
All these signs, one after the other too; I’m relaxed around them; I feel real happiness inside a part of me that I’ve hidden from the world; I’m comforted by them simply being nearby.
Even right down to the stupid things like coffee, and how they both eat their vegetables first and meat last, exactly like I do, only continues to stack up the things we share because we’re each other’s complementing half.
Putting their coffees down in front of them, I stay on my feet. “Why don’t we go upstairs? I don’t want to be down here in case Sergey gets back.”
They are both standing up before I’ve finished speaking.
“Where is he?” Kade asks, automatically adjusting himself so he’s more focused and less friendly. Falling straight into the role he said he would, as a guard.
“Apparently on a business trip.”
Santiago wears how he feels about the situation on his face, not hiding anything.
He doesn’t need to ask any more questions to tell me he’s completely offended at what Sergey did.
Except he’s an Alpha, and they deal differently.
He tips his head to the side, his eyes becoming colder by the second.
“And you were left completely alone? No guards and no staff here?”
“I have Nalla and the black dog. But yes, no humans were here.”
His anger rips through the room like a storm sweeping in.
I have to breathe slowly through my mouth.
But as quick as it started, the onset of his sudden emotion fades and is replaced by his sweet amber scent.
And then Kade also reacts. His perfume is more subtle but no less powerful, and together, they intertwine into a unique cinnamon-amber scent that makes my insides dance, whispering of safety and protection.
Together, they become a better version of each other, giving me exactly what I need from my scent-matched mates. It’s a solid reminder, a really freaking nice one, but I’m already dealing with so much. That small reminder pushes me over the edge.
I walk out into the hallway, giving us a chance to work through the issue without the influence of scents and designations.
The dogs are already on either side of me.
I wait in the hallway for Kade and Santiago to join me before I pop my head back in to make sure I locked the back door.
I don’t even glance at the man who attacked me before flicking the lights off and pulling the door to a close, checking the handle to make sure it’s locked before leading them back to the foyer.
I keep walking, and they follow quietly. It feels so normal having them close, and I need to figure out if that’s a good thing, or if that’s me being selfish as fuck.
Stopping at the entrance to the living room, I point inside. “My room is across the hall. I don’t use the first two bedrooms, but if you need to rest, you could use them.”
“This is fine, Quinn,” Kade says, but I cut him off.
“There’s a kitchenette and television, so help yourself to them.”
“What are you going to be doing?”
I blow out a noisy exhale at Santiago’s question, trying to figure out the best way of answering it. “Trying to decide what the hell I am going to do about you both being here. I can’t do that while we’re in the same room.”
The unsaid reasons hang in the air between us as obvious as their scents.
Taking a deep inhale of the beautiful, tainted air around them, I keep my expression as blank as possible as I cover my hand over my mouth, talking fast to get everything out before I lock myself in my room.
“I don’t know if my room is bugged, or if I’m being watched.
There’s going to be situations that come up that you won’t like, but I need you to always remember, no matter what, that I’m here by choice.
Whatever we had previously isn’t on the table and won’t be again.
I think we all need some time apart to think about this. ”
And then I lock myself in my room.